Stuck up for a cd in a bar in my own little way

[StephanieCD]

I was out at my buddy's bachelor party the other night and some asshole who came with us was a little too vocal for my liking. He yelled "Tranny" out the window at some girl who looked a little manly. It wasn't a guy, 'for sure' though. I cringed and let it ride because I didn't want to cause a scene - or draw any attention to myself because almost no one knows I dress.

Later that night, when we were hanging out in a bar (with a mechanical bull of all things!), a bona fide cd came in with a group of girls. I'm 99% sure I wasn't mistaken because it takes one to know one, ya know? I heard her voice, watched her walk, saw how the girls were being extra nice to her... know what I mean? Anyway, the guy with the loud mouth was sitting with me. So far that night, he had yelled "fag" at an effeminate man more than once, called some people random names, used various racial terms, and generally gotten on my nerves. When the CD walked by he did a double take, got a big grin and looked at me (because he thought his remarks were cool and he liked to be seen being mouthy). When he looked at me, I'd had enough. I put my finger in his face and said 'dude, don't even. Just f***ng don't.' He made a gesture which pretty much said 'but look, look, look!' and then he pouted.

But, in my own little way, I stood up for her that night and I wanted to share with someone. I wanted to go and say something encouraging and supporting - even 'right on sister' (with a wink and a shhhh) but I didn't have the balls to do it in front of my friends. But still, it felt good to keep that guy's mouth shut. He could have really hurt her feelings.

Good to see you all - glad this place is still around!

[Adrienne Heels]

Good for you, Stephanie!! That jerk deserved to be told to stop. And your "sister" would have appreciated it if she knew!

[Helen in OK]

I agree, you did the right thing. We all have our issues, and no one like to be ridiculed nor humiliated.

Helen in OK

[ColleenCD]

Way to represent Stephanie! You had enough kahonas to keep the jerk in check. Had you not, that could have been a great night spoiled by a sister.

Colleen

[bredalee25]

Way to go Stephanie if I were the one sitting with a loud mouth like that I'd most likely have done the very same thing. One of my pet peeves is people who don't understand us and have to stimulate their masculinty by shouting bad thing about us in public.
What would you do if he hadn't kept quiet? Me i'd probabally drag him outside and pop him in his smart a** mouth.

ttfn

[StephanieCD]

If he had been rude anyway I probably would have gone over and apologized and bought her a drink. Then, if any of the guys I was with gave me shit (he would have been the only one) I would have brought up that I used to share a house with a pre-op TS and told him that he had no idea what he just done to that person. A buddy there would have backed me up on it because he met my TS friend way back then.

Take the attention off of me. It works for magicians, they call it misdirection, I call it survival ;)

[Jenny Beth]

Nice going Stephanie, jerks like that need to be brought down a peg or two. Usually idiots like that have identity problems and need to be the center of attention to prove their manhood. If only they knew how stupid they looked!

[GG Vanya]

And Mr. Mouth is most likely a bi/gay crossdresser himself. Those latent desires scare the bejeezus outta them, and they just *have* to convince the masses they're Mr. Macho Het. :thumbsdn:

[Kate Simmons]

Good thing I wasn't there, Hon. I'd have decked the idiot. Then again, I've always had this subtle way of doing things........:heehee: Ericka

[Barb Valentine]

Good thing I wasn't there, Hon. I'd have decked the idiot. Then again, I've always had this subtle way of doing things........:heehee: Ericka

Like turning around quickly with your elbow about his nose level
And saying did you see that
Oh I'm sorry did I do that ;Let me help you up off the floor:heehee:
Works every time

[KewTnCurvy GG]

Honestly, I would have told him in no uncertain terms I found his behavior and comments patently offensive!! If he didn't stop, I would have left. But that's me!
kew
Glad you did do something though. :)

[Kierci]

We all owe you a Thank You, Just think that could have been her first time in general public scared out of her mind, If he had gotten it off it could have led to her last time in public, granted she will never know but we can all hope that someone will do that for us in the same situation. Koodo's to you There is 1 **ATA GIRL** for you dont lose it.

[Vash]

A sincere thanks and BRAVO to you from Vash(temporarily in the third person)Nice job Stephanie


Vash

[Khriss]

..Neanderthals live !! among us ??
yeah ......such degrees of ignorace are painfull..
likely not..to the asshole ..You describe..
.. my best advice is... let it go ! letting bigots take up space in Your head ..seems like "rent" they will never pay ?? eh? xx"K"

[Joy Carter]

Steff It's called "instant Asshole" one drink and the mouth over takes the brain. And I gotta agree with Vanya about the latent HS thing, he maybe hiding something. Too bad people can't just leave well enough alone. :hmph:

[Brianna Lovely]

Although I'm glad that you said something to this idiot, your story made me very sad. After getting over my initial hurt, I'm able to write this post.

After some serious thought, I think you should dump your so called "friends". In my opinion, if none of your "friends" told this bigot to shut up, then either they're afraid of him, or worse, agree with his rude behavior.

I don't think any of us need "friends" like that.

[Sophia Rearen]

Thanks Stephanie,
I have to believe there are more people like you, than him. If it were me out with the girls (love that) I certainly would hope someone or many would behave as you. Way to go:clap:

[janedoe311]

Not much else to say on that.

[Blonde]

And Mr. Mouth is most likely a bi/gay crossdresser himself. Those latent desires scare the bejeezus outta them, and they just *have* to convince the masses they're Mr. Macho Het. :thumbsdn:

I have to agree somewhat with this statement.
He is just sooo unsure of his own masculinity he has to put on a big show.

[kateyliz]

Yeah, what they all said. Me too. Hugs, Kathy

[Ellaine]

I like your style Stephanie. Nice one, well done! He just may have grown up a little from that. :)

[sue_donim]

way to go stephanie

way back when I was still in the closet I would have just ignored it and said nothing, not wanting to draw attention to myself.

Now everyone knows what I am. Even if it was someone I'd only just met. I would lean over and quietly say I found his attitude offensive and proudly state I also wear female clothing, then slap him across the face and tell everyone it was because I had just admitted being transgendered to him, and he had tried to touch me up.

Hugs Sue_donim

[Shannen]

Stephanie, does this guy know it's the 21st Century? It amazes me how much b/s people used to put up with. We all deserve to NOT be yelled at and called names. I even teach my children that name calling is not right!

Remember "sticks and stones..." well, I think it's been a few years since humanity realized that names can hurt.

Thanks for sticking up. I know how awkward it can be in situations where people start to degrade other crossdressers. What they are lacking and what we have is called empathy. I'm glad I have it, I know why he'll never get it.

-Shannen

[Ms.Susan]

This is a great example of why we are all here. We need to look out for and stick up for each other out there. It's a small world. Why to go GIRL. :love:

[Jestina]

YES Stephanie!!!!!!!!!!

I love it.
I am only borderline passable, and then only if my girlfriend does my face.

I still haven't ventured out though.


I was recently told that I can be very intimidating When in my guy mode, even though I am only average size.

When my friend told me that recently I immediately laughed because in my mind I thought of how embarrasing it would be for some jerk just like that guy to have his ass kicked by a man in a dress.

It makes me smirk, I am actually very demure you know!!!

GO Stephanie that was one for all of us.

Jestina.

[gennee]

It's great that you stuck for a Cd. It also shows how ignorant this guy is. What would he have done if the CD told him where to go?

Gennee


:happy:

[Jennifer Giovannetta]

That was very nice of you. Maybe the asshole with the big mouth has some gender, or sexual issues of his own.

[Diana West]

Maybe it's because I sometimes see the funny things in life too much, but I think what you did was hysterical.
Here he is calling people "fag," "tranny," etc. But when someone stands up to him (a CD, no less) he backs down real quick.
I kind of wished he would have said something to our sister and she would have decked him.
He'd be in therapy for sure.

[ronnie06]

I am very proud of you.

bullies and idiots come in all sizes shapes ans forms.

thank you, for your warm note here.


dear santa,
there ARE nice people out there.
signed
veronica in wisconsin

[Bethanygirl]

Good thing I wasn't there, Hon. I'd have decked the idiot. Then again, I've always had this subtle way of doing things........:heehee: Ericka

Good thing I wasn't there either, or my wife would have decked the idiot. Then again while she has always been pure gg, she's always had an usubtle way of doing things...
:heehee:

[linnea]

Honestly, I would have told him in no uncertain terms I found his behavior and comments patently offensive!! If he didn't stop, I would have left. But that's me!
kew
Glad you did do something though. :)

I'm glad you did something too. I've been in similar situations, but I have not consistently "stood up" for my convictions. However, I know that when I do, I always feel better about it, and I'm sure that our sister would definitely appreciate what you did had she known about it. I appreciate it in a vicarious sort of way. Thank you for doing what you did and for sharing it with us.

[Madeleine]

Right on Honey,

You did it right without losing face. And saved another's face at the same time - Well done.

I hope someone does that for me if and when I need it.

Hugs all round - Madeleine...

[Lawren]

That's just the kind of guy that I do not want to be around. His bad mouth makes everyone with him look like scum. I don't party with people like that, not more than once anyway.

[Penny]

Way to go! Some people just have to be loud; it's difficult for others to hear them with their reckdom and they know it too.

:hugs:

Penny

[Diana_BiMale_CD]

I think a couple of the gurls hit the nail on the head, I have found that most big mouths who have that homophobic attitude are latent homosexuals themselves, or are afraid they are. I have known a few like that in my years. Society deems it necessary that men act macho, if they are a little afraid they aren't macho enough they ridicule anyone that looks less macho then they think they do. Kind of stupid really, as when I meet a guy like that I and most of my friends look askance at him wondering why he is making such a big thing of such a small thing. Of course it may be that they are thinking of their own shortcomings, if you know what I mean. "The guy who turns the light off in the restroom so his shortcomings don't show". Way to go Stephanie.

[S. Lisa Smith]

Very good, bravo!

[Lauren Richards]

Timing is important when making a point. Your choice of when to let him know what was acceptable, and being firm but not beligerent, were critical in getting your point across. Nice!

[ReginaK]

It's great that you stuck for a Cd. It also shows how ignorant this guy is. What would he have done if the CD told him where to go?

Gennee


:happy:

What would he have done if that crossdresser got up and beat him down? :lol:

[RachelDenise]

Your Bunny is proud of you! Way to go. You did very well to keep things under control.