Hints for going shopping

[zoe jordon]

hi im zoe
sometimes when I go shopping I get really shy and just walk out!!!! I have been a few times, how do I overcome this !!!!
LOVE ZOE!!!

[Jasmine Ellis]

walk into a shop think of one item go to where they got that item have a look make sure its in your size then go over to pay for it give the money then walk out simple

[Phyliss]

Zoe, been there done that. The first time I went to a Lane bryant I must have paced back and forth in front of the store for ten minutes before i walked in. Got five feet in the store and turned and left.
The next time I walked right in, looked around and left.

The point is: take small steps one at a time. Soon enough you'll be buying like a pro. Once you make THAT FIRST PURCHASE and you realize that the world didn't end, you'll be fine. That is a hurdle everybody has to jump on their own.

[AprilMae]

And know that no one is going to care what you buy, as long as you put up your money. Any clerk or store manager is a fool to turn away a customer, and any customer in the will be concerned with their own business. If they aren't who care? You'll never see them again. Go for it.

[ashleyinwpb]

I always go and I try to be very forward with the sales people but I lean in and tell them discreetly to make sure they're cool with me shopping...most are very helpful....I found this website that allows me to express my fem side with out actually wearing ggirls clothes...wwwTGtees.com (http://www.tgtees.com) I just got my clothes yesterday and I wore them out drinking with my buddies at one of our friends new BBQ joints...have fun shopping....also do you ave a SO or close girlfriend you can go with...Regards, Ash

[zoe jordon]

And know that no one is going to care what you buy, as long as you put up your money. Any clerk or store manager is a fool to turn away a customer, and any customer in the will be concerned with their own business. If they aren't who care? You'll never see them again. Go for it.


I could drive to another town and shop there !!!!
lots and lots of love Zoe

[AprilMae]

I could drive to another town and shop there !!!!
lots and lots of love Zoe

Sure, make an outing of it. I've bought just about every item possible in a store inmale attire and never had a problem.

[Joanie]

It's easy now that things have changed...the first time shopping for a skirt I was promptly arrested, put on trial, outed to everyone I have ever know, lost my job, wife and family, house, etc. fined $50.000.00 and served a five year jail sentence but those laws are off the books now!

Seriously, the above shows you the kind of stuff we must fear happening and thus it can paralyze us if we let it when everything mention above is, of course, pure fiction.

For the first time last weekend--Two Lane Bryants, two visits to their dressing rooms, no one noticed, no one seemed to care. I had a little speech ready in case a female customer tried to give me a hard time--I was going to point to the blue jeans and say "Oh, how come it's OK for you to try/buy/wear these in public but I can't wear this skirt in PRIVATE?"

Anyway, all fears were groundless and my shopping life has gotten off the ground!!!!!!! GO FOR IT!!!

[AprilMae]

It's easy now that things have changed...the first time shopping for a skirt I was promptly arrested, put on trial, outed to everyone I have ever know, lost my job, wife and family, house, etc. fined $50.000.00 and served a five year jail sentence but those laws are off the books now!

GO FOR IT!!!

I thought they put you in the Stocks in the Town Square for that.

[Alayna]

Before I got used to it, I would try to keep in mind two things: How I would feel later if I let my fear get the better of me, and how I would feel if I went through with it and came home with the things I wanted. That was usually enough to get me to muster up the courage to walk to the register

[Wendy me]

just remember in the stores are those to die for killer shoes and all kinds of cute things that you want ...... things you desirer ...... things you deserve ....... and the only thing keeping your inner girl from getting them and wearing them is a silly guy's thinking that "HE CAN'T DO IT" so kick "HIS" but in the door and get shopping ..... it's relay simple when you think of it like that.....

[zoe jordon]

I LIKE YOUR STYLE!!!! EVERYONES SO POSITIVE !!! THATS WHAT I NEED !!!!WHEN I GET PAID IM GOING GET SOME STUFF AND SHOW YOU ALL
THE END OF THIS MONTH
ps thank god i found girls



Love Zoe xx

[Samantha B L]

Hi Zoe,I've been shopping out at shopping centers,shopping malls and department stores for 30 years.I also sometimes shop on line.I was scared the first couple of times,paced around,lost my nerve and walked out after maybe 10 minutes went by.But it finally hit me gradually that the salespeople don't even know me anyway and really don't care what I'm up to.In fact, they probably like it better if you buy something than if you pace up and down gulping deep breaths.So I've found that with rare exceptions pactically all "family" clothing businesses are tg freindly,glad to help and they will sell you anything!there are ocaisional provisos,of course.Some places won't let guys "try out" lingerie,bikinis,stockings,etc.,but if you can guess and have your size memorized,they will sell it to you,no problem.And usually,the women's clothe's changing stalls are out of the question.But actually,that's not true every place.What's just wonderful are certain businesses such as wig stores,club wear,etc.that have a big cd clientel.You can be completely flat out truthful that an item is for you and not your "girlfreind,Aunt,Sister" Samantha

[Tammi_52]

Zoe,

That's one of the GREAT aspects of this forum. You get support. Since I joined this forum just a few weeks ago I have walked into the local stores (Wally-world and Pamida) and purchased cosmetics, bras, pantyhose, blouses (not all at once, mind you). But reading posts from the other girrls gave me the courage when I realized I certainly was not the only one who had doubts about purchasing items without guilt, etc.

Don't have a Lane Bryant or Dress Barn here, but can't wait for that first road trip!!! :happy:

[jill c]

Hi Zoe,

Just 2 weeks ago, i walked through a Wal-mart, by the bras and panties. I went as far as stopping to look closely. The bras were sorted by style, not size. After a few seconds of looking through the tags, I got frustered and walked out.

Sunday evening, I decided to try again. I bought a bra, skirt, and blouse. i was relaxed most of the time. i had a few groceries in the cart to hide the goods.

once i got flustered and walked through the grocery aisles for a while. Then came back to finish.

I then went through the self checkout station.

it was "scary - but worth it!!!

The blouse did not fit. It was too tight accross the shoulders. This was not good. But i could never return it. Not to that stage yet.



i really wanted shoes. So tonight, I went to a Payless shoes Store. i announced that i had agreed to dress for halloween. THe lady was very nice and after a few minutes said that she had no women's shoe over size 12. She called another store. 20 minutes later, I had to repeat the story. This clerk was also very nice - she got the phone call form the first store. she showed me the few pairs that she did have. She asked questions like, how dressy, I was to be. I described a black skirt and hose. She told me to just try on what ever I liked. There were only 2 pair of size 13 shoes. i was not ready for the boots???? I tried on a few pair with black socks. PICTURE THAT. I made the choice, 3 to 4" heels. I went to pay and found 2 ladies with lots of kids paying. I just put the lid on the shoes and waited my turn. The shoes were $17.00, with tax.

I had never worn hells. Geeze they hurt. my toes push to the ends. Feel Good sitting. But i did it.

I paid cash, so there no fear of being "known". Keep other items in the art to hide the goods. Leave the area for a while if need be.

It felt nice once I reached the truck. Even better now that I have the shoes.... nothing else is like this.

Thanks for the idea of using Halloween for cover!!!!

Jill C.

[Joanie]

I answered earlier about diminishing the fear by thinking about all the things that won't happen-fines, arrest, etc. shopping for a skirt or whatever but here are a few more practical tips..

1. Call ahead, get the name of whoever answers (assuming they are friendly and say they will welcome you) as this gave me added confidence.
2. Shop out of town, that reduces the fear of having someone you know walk in.
3. Go to a store that is not hooked into a Mall, that reduces the chances of guys coming in, tagging along with their wives.

I almost bought a skirt and blouse at Target but chickened out when the lines were full of these redneck guys waiting to ring up purchases. I didn't feel comfortable at all. I am not worried about women seeing me try/buy their clothes--its the thought of other guys that bug me.

In Lane Bryant, entirely different--all female, all engrossed in blouse browsing or whatever. When I came out of the dressing room, one guy was there on a cell phone waiting on his wife but he didn't even notice me and they soon left. A lot of it is luck cause you don't know who will be on the other side of that changing room when you come out and even though I was back in drab, I was holding two blouses, a sweater, and a skirt.

Bottom line....find a Lane Bryant not hooked into a mall.

[Chrissy31]

The first few times I went shopping for womens clothes I decided that I wasn't going to constantly look around to see If other people are watching me or pace around nervously. I decided to walk slowly and not look at any of the other shoppers and just focus on looking through the racks and clothes until I found something I wanted and then take it up to the desk and pay for it. I only made eye contact with the cashier and no-one else, I wasn't being rude I just decided that if people pointed or stared it was best not to see them so it wouldn't effect my confidence. Most people are only interested in their own potential purchases and really take no notice of you. Of course if you pace around and look nervously to see if other people are watching you are likely to arouse the suspicion of a store detective or store staff.
Think to yourself what's the worst that can happen, in my opinion not being able to buy what you want.

[Adrienne Heels]

No one cares that you are shopping for women's clothes...they are too busy with their own lives. I was in The Limited the other night browsing...so many GGs in there, and none of them watching me. The only person watching me was one of the SA's , because she was trying to sell me things! And by the way, they can be very helpful in putting together an outfit for you. If I had had my heels and panties with me, I would have tried on some pants while I was there...in drab.

[Byllie]

There's a shoppinjg plaza halfway between home and my job, a one hour commute. That's where I shop. They have a nice Marshall's and a Kohl's. Beyond all the hints given so far, all I can add is practice makes perfect.

[DAVIDA]

Halloween-smalloween, The people at payless love seeing me walk in. They know that I will more likely than not, walk out with at least two pair. Not always for me but for the wife too!

[Joanie]

Seems a real trend here...women just don't notice us shopping and therefore don't care as long as, that is, they don't know you. Due to her busy schedule (mine is less so) I deal alot with my wife's private life, running errands for her which includes returning clothes she changes her mine on, etc. so thus I am pretty comfortable dealing with cashiers. It's that "one small step for a woman, one giant leap for a crossdresser" to the ladies dressing room that had me a little disconcerted but it was worth it! No big deal in the end!

[trannie T]

I can identify with your fears. I went through the same thing. My fears were not justified, in years of shopping I've never received a negative reaction or had any kind of problem. Keep shopping and soon your fears will be gone. Go for it girl!

[Myst]

I've had many fears when shopping for clothes. Most of the time, I would just walk out, but since joining this forum, things have been much different! Right now, I almost have a complete wardrobe - skirts, pants, tops, bras, panties, make-up, etc...

Everyone here is so supportive and helpful, it makes things a lot easier for this girl knowing that others have gone and are going through the same things... but one thing is for sure, zoe, once you get over your fears and find out how much fun shopping is, I'll bet that you won't ever want to stop!

[Glenda58]

After years of shopping in drab it became easy no fears no worries go in and buy. But now shopping dress is a all new ball game the same fears and worries guess it will take practice. And thats all you have to do is practice and you will see nobody cares what you buy even the SA.

[JennAubade]

I go to a nearby town. I used to turn beet red and get very embarrassed the first year or two I shopped for my own stuff (which started with lingerie only, which made it even more awkward). Finally I got to the point where I can try on dressess and shoes without any issues. Only once did anyone ever say anything to me, and it was just kind of surprise that I was carrying a dress into the dressing room. Maybe I was her first cd customer!

[noname]

I found the key is to not care what other think. So the saying if you don't care, no one else will. Well, it's not entirely true. Basically my additude is that it's their problem not mine. I've gotten some odd looks just shopping for jeans, and I do find it upsetting but it's their problem not mine. Besides GG shop for mens underwear without a second glance, so I say screw em.

[Kierci]

The other day I bought a pair of pantyhose at a CVS around the corner from my house. The girl at the counter asked me what they were for. My usual response to a question like that is brutally honest " Hey I look great in a skirt These help fine tune my image" usually I will get a laugh of some sort and that conversation is done from there. I have only once had a girl respond " I'd like to see that" she was actually sincere about it, although I never got up the nerve to return and show her do to the fact that a neighbor could walk in anytime. Honesty usually confuses people wo what the hell use it. LOL Have fun and keep smiling and dont turn red unless you are emfemme then it makes a cheap blush. :love:

[Vash]

Just to add one bit of advice. For me I like to find a place where I feel comfortable and then build a relationship with an employee there. They don't need to know who it's for or why (what you want to tell them is up to you), they just need to know who you are.After that when you go there they are more likely to make you feel comfortable about shopping there and know your tastes and sizes. It may take a few tries and a few trips to the place you settle on,but after that you will shop like a pro.

Vash

[Bev06 GG]

I could drive to another town and shop there !!!!
lots and lots of love Zoe

Good idea Zoe. And if you know anyone who would accompany you even better. Its often easier if you have a friend to give you alittle bit of dutch courage. My partner used to get really nervous but now he's fine. We always go to another town and we always go together.
Take care
BEVxxx

[Adrienne Heels]

Vash is right...not only is it more fun to shop in a store where the SA's know you, they can be much more helpful to you if they know your femme style.

[Muriel]

Many moons ago I used to make many failed attempts to go and buy femme stuff for myself, that was until I could convince myself I was being stupid about all this. As has been said already they are more interested in taking your money than if the skirt or whatever is for you.

One day I went determined that I would overcome this fear and arrived at the shop and needing a skirt, bra and me underwear. Not giving a second thought I engaged the attention of a shop assistant using the excuse I was buying for a SO, she couldn't have been more helpful and I came away with what I went to buy.

Even today although I don't need to I still ask a shop assistant for help, it kind of puts the shoe on the other foot so to speak.

[Beth-GDB]

hi im zoe
sometimes when I go shopping I get really shy and just walk out!!!! I have been a few times, how do I overcome this !!!!
LOVE ZOE!!!

Sheer guts and a "take no prisoners" attitude. :D I've been to boutiques a couple of times and bought femme clothes without any problems, including trying them on in the store. I've been to shoe stores and told the sales person I wanted women's shoes for me, tried them on in the store and bought them, etc. I can quite happily walk into a department store or lingerie boutique, pick whatever I want off the rack, take it to a counter and buy it. However, once in a while I'll have one of those moments when I'll take a couple of steps through the front door, feel very self consious then turn around and leave (exactly that happened last week).

I know the feeling all too well of looking through femme items by myself in a store. I keep thinking "I wonder who's watching me and what they're thinking?", but the reality is that I've never had anyone say anything to me that's been a problem, it's just my overactive imagination. I do tend to feel most comfortable when the store is very empty (eg just after they open on a weekday morning) or when it's moderately busy (but the queues at the counters are small) and I'm just another anonymous person among everyone else there.

I live in a fairly large city so it's not a problem for me to go across town to a mall where I don't usually go shopping. The chances of my neighbours, friends or someone from work seeing me trying on heels in a shoe store or entering/leaving a change room with a dress are a lot lower that way. If random strangers give me funny looks when I'm shopping for femme items (and to be honest I've never noticed if they have), who cares. It's highly unlikely that they'll shop at the same supermarket I normally use so they'll probably never see me again.

If someone else has a problem with what clothes I buy and wear, THEY have a problem, not me.