For the GGs In her space

[ubokvt]

A little back ground, about 5 yrs ago my SO told me I she felt presured/overpowered by me and wanted some space in our relationship. My response was, HUH! Complete incomprehension, but ok, sure how do we do that. "I can FIX that" And so a five year journey began, I not really close yet but I'm begining to ubderstand it.

This is hard, so bear with me, and the language, so value laden, it misses the point at times. Space seems like ying and yang in a relationship, we both couldn"t be in the same place at once, we had to move around each other. (I use big and small in only the broadest and most general terms). Our roles shifted as space shifted, we both remain our selves, persons, not girl or boy, the roles shift from big and small based on whose space we were in, and with it the emotions, feelings, and behaviors. I'm learning so much.

So GGs can your SO be in your space. Is he able to move and adjust as you move. If not why. In your space can he accept true feminine energy expressed in nurturing or does he fight it. Does he respond differently. Can you accept that shift in response as right natural. Can you see, what patriachy would see as feminine, expressed in his response to you. I'd love your coments, and insights maybe I can cut some time off this journey. I sure with your help I can FIX this.

[MsJanessa]

not to be rude but I can't understand what you are trying to say---are you seeking advice how to give an SO more "space" in a relationship? Your post does not indicate why your SO felt she wanted more space or what you and she did to ensure she had it. Could you be a little more specific please?

[Josi]

I know that YOU know what you mean ... but I am sorry .. I cant understand what you are asking.

Can you reword it for us simple folk?

Kind regards

[Julie York]

When a woman says she needs space, she really means "You are seriously getting on my nerves and I can't stand being around you."


Hope that helps.

[Snookums]

personally I think a SO needing more space is lame,no offense.

[sparks]

I'm about as lost as the next person here. All I can say is if a "woman says I need space" Than give it. Now you mentioned a five year journey. That's alot of space. Maybe time to call it quits.

[brandie]

My Theary On This Is Ditch The Bitch. There Are Many More Fish In The Sea, And Why Wast Five Years Of Your Life In Agany Makes No Sence To Me
Ps Sorry For The Slang(bitch)

Brandie

[Charity's GG]

I'm not sure I understand the meaning of this thread but I'll try to answer it so maybe it gives you some insight.

Being in a relationship takes LOTS of patience...and yes I firmly believe we all need space...whether it be 5 minutes or 4 hours...we all need breathing room...to collect our thoughts, to have "my time" etc. This does not mean that we love you less, it just means we want to be alone.

Another thing it might mean is...sometimes, even though we are supportive GG's, we need a break from the dressing. I dont mean any disrespect, but sometimes we want to recollect our thoughts and devote time specifically to ourselves, instead of dwelling on shopping and make up tips with our men.

I hope this makes sense and I hope it helps..Toodles! Charity

[Kerry Owens]

One of the things in relationships is it's elastic, a little give one day, then another it's take, like a dance, maybe you both need to sit down, and clarify where you are in your steps so to speak. Good luck to you both.

[Sheila]

I think a SO needing more space is lame,no offense.

WHY is it Lame,------------ and do you have a supporting SO. Comments like that make me understand why SO's withdraw support

Jess(SO)

[scarlet]

It couldnt have been said any better then Kerry Owens above put it although it could easily be elaborated upon. Any relationship is a constantly changing challenge to keep it working . Otherwise just think how dull life would be!

[Leasa Wells]

I live alone, I am someone who needs alot of space. Why, because of the time it gives me to reflect on the things I do. I am not sure why I need so much but I do. Is this a problem i dont thinks so, but I can see that anyone in a relationship from time to time need their own space.

Hey lighten up people repect individuality, isnt that what we want from other people too.

:2c:

[stacylynn1]

might be time to let go

[Kahlan51]

Whatever space a person needs is what they need. A request for this needs to be respected and also kept in context of the rest of the relationship. My wife and I talk it over and do whatever works with out much consideration about what "others" think. Only people that we consider is friends and family. Just do whatever works for you. Kahlan:hugs:

[Robin Leigh]

Marla S, can you translate this one for us, please? :D

Robin