Dressing something more than a sexual feelimg

[ubokvt]

I admit that in my dressing there has always been a sexual undertone some times more than others. But there has always been something else. At one time it was a surogate for the person that wasn't in my life. At others it was the only way to sate a feeling i couldn't express as a man. Does dressing fill a hole in your life. Can you discribe it. Do you feel more complete as it becomes part of you.

[LindaG]

Can you discribe it. Do you feel more complete as it becomes part of you.

I think I am embraceing my X cromazone. nine times out of ten I will look at a
women and I would want to be with her but that 10th time I will look at a woman and I would want to be her,I really cant explain it. I do know that we were told all of our lives that men dressing as women is wrong, but If This is wrong then I do not want to be right!

Olive

[DeeInGeorgia]

I too used it as a surogate for the person that was not in my life. It was and is also there as a substitute for physical touch and physical affection. It is also there for me as a way of belonging, as in many social situations I do not feel like I fit in very well. It has been only this past year that I really feel like I am in a community that I truly identify with and fit in with.

As a pre-teen and then teen I didn't really have close friends that I did things with. I was in scouting and did things with my fellow scouts, but after the meeting or hike or camping trip, I didn't go to their houses to play.

On a few occassions, in order to play with my sister and her friend, in order to belong to a group, we would dress up in leotards and pretend to be ballarinas. I was absolutely awful at sports and was always the last person chosen, or being refused for a team for stand up games at play time. My sister was taking ballet lessons and I was able to get my parents let me take ballet one year. I got kidded some, being called twinkle toes.

So it is only recently, after coming out to my wife, that I am not so afraid of being found out. I am able to feel pleasure enjoying the look of clothing, of looking and feeling pretty. I have this lace and ruffles blouse that I just adore as well as other blouses and skirts and accessories. I never got excited over mens clothes, ever. So I am starting to be able to be freer emotionally.

Dee

[Dee Model]

Dressing, i have come to realise, defines me as a person. I mean sure, i get (a form of) sexual gratification from it but ultimately it is who i am. And we must be ourselves, otherwise: what is the point?

[Dee Model]

Society and all the rules it tacity enforces are all founded on bull****! There can't be nothin wrong with it when there are so many of us going through it!

[VTDresser]

I have finally accepted that dressing makes me feel good and I should not deny myself the pleasure. It does have some sexual feelings but lately I have not had the urge to dress and satisfy myself. dressing does that all by itself.

[Natasha_82]

For me it's for purely sexual gratification. Ifyou read my most recent post titled My CD fantasy it may seem like I have more motive behind cding but even that fantasy has a completely sexually gratifing reason behind it

[MichelleOBrien]

For me it's not even a sexual thing. It makes me feel...right. I mean, the only time I feel like I am truly myself is when I'm dressed. I guess I'm blessed to have some family members who at least try to understand and let me be without criticising me. I'm still hesitant to actually tell most people about who I really am. I've never really felt like a guy, but I played football and did all sorts of guy things to fit in. what's really wierd is that I find myself at a point in my life where I am 50-50 on what I see in women. half the time I want them in my bed, the other half I catch myself wishing I at least looked half as good as they did.

[Amy Hepker]

I have an inner feeling and an outer feeling about dressing and I like dressing in both of them. I do feel sexual release from dressing as I do an emotional release. Is it really wrong to do something that makes you feel good as long as you are not hurting others. Although there are many that say it is wrong and you are hyrting them by dressing, because it is against their moral standards. You have to decide whether you want to please everyone else or yourself. Are we being selfish in dressing, I don't think so, we are releasing that person inside of us that is there and needs to come out. It would be very unsafe to keep our other side bottled up our whole lives, and I feel that this is a big problem in this world. I do believe the world could be a better place if everyone could be who we really were inside. Some people fight this battle all their lives inside themselves, and destroy their whole life trying to meat the expectations of other or morals.

[Naomi]

I would say i feel sexy when dressed but not sexually aroused........there is a difference between the two. For sure years ago trying on femme underwear had an arousing effect, but so anylonger.
As for what motivates my c/ding, well ive given up analizing it now, it just takes up time which could be better spent dressing up.

[Andrea_girl]

For me the girl inside is always wanting to show her self off. Its like being 2 people which is a bit scary.

I think we are the 3rd gender

[RachelDenise]

In the past, the sexual part was the driving force. Now I realize that showing or expressing my fem side is a part of me and makes me whole when I am dressed. Don't get me wrong, there is still a sexual part to my dressing, just as any person would have in their life. I have the inner peace and satisfaction of expression of my true identity and it makes me feel wonderful!

[Stefanie_in_Mt]

In the very beginning there was some sexual gratifacation to dressing, but as i got older it has become more of a drug to me, When I'm dressed en femme, I feel so relaxed and at ease. It's really part of who I am.
Stefanie

[Sharon B.]

I would have to say I use it as a surrogate for not having that certain someone in my life.
As a male I am real quiet and have at times gotten depress at lot.
I can apply nail polish to my toenails and feel 100-percent better about myself and have worn panties under my drab attire and feel a lot better also.
Now let me dress fully and if someone happens to call on the phone I will feel like talking until the other person wants to hang up.
I was brought to believe that what I enjoy doing is wrong, maybe I am just in the wrong body and haven't realized it yet or been true to myself about it.
It seems society will condemn us for be feminine but turn the other way on the real issues that they should be concerned about.

[Mary Jane]

For most all my life I had an "itch" that was not getting scratched. I tried many different things to take care of this. Something was missing and I just could not put my finger on it. Then, after I started dressing completely the "itch" went away and I felt there was no longer something missing. I have been a more complete person for the 7 years or so since I really got serious about my dressing and certainly a happier person.

[Casey Morgan]

That "something else" to my dressing has been different things, sometimes a few things at the same time. Towards the beginning I was creating a character. But I eventually realized I wasn't creating her from whole cloth. She was coming from a part of me that I was locking away.

I began exploring that part of me, and dressing became a way of, I don't know, diverting my attention away from the fact that I was exploring it. As that part of me began to blossom, dressing started to become a way of visually representing that part of me. The more clearly I could see it, the stronger that part of me became.

I still couldn't accept that part of me, no matter how much it had blossomed and how true it was so I shunted it to the side. It became another me, so much so that I used to feel like there were two people standing here. Dressing became a validation of that other me. It was my way of saying "this is me too".

When I realized that there is only one me, that "something else" to dressing changed yet again. Dressing partially is me being comfortable in my own skin, a joyful claiming of all the seemingly contradictory parts of who I am. Dressing fully has come back to creating a character, but one not made from whole cloth. But I wonder if I've got that figured out right. Could it really be a way not of dividing myself again (which ties with losing one "side" of me as my biggest fear) but of embracing and further exploring my feminine side unencumbered by my masculine side? Is it a way to let that side grow even more now that I know I'm not going to lose either side or fully become either side?

So you see, uboktv, even now that "something else" to my dressing is evolving and changing its meaning. That's what it means to me now, and you've seen what it's meant to me at different points in my journey. Ask me tomorrow what it means and I may have a (slightly?) different answer for you.

I wouldn't say that dressing fills a hole in me. It's a way of understanding more about myself, a catalyst for exploration if you will. And it is helping me be more complete.

[Rachaelb64]

At first, in my teens, it was more sexual than anything, me being a frustrated teen unable to talk to girls :o .

Later on it has become less sexual, still get a kick now and again but not so much these days.

But I do go through cycles were I have no urges to dress (it can last for weeks) then bham! I cant wait to get home and dress......

But like most I watch woman and go mmmm.....nice, then other times its would that top look good on me :happy:

In years gone by when I was in a black depressive mood about my crossdressing racked with guilt, trying to give it up I thought maybe I was schizophrenic.

Recently as I have come to trems with myself I've decided that if I'm insane than hey so what!

I rather be insane and a crossdresser, than sane an ar****le :D

[Kate Simmons]

I pretty much agree with Casey. My character (myself) is continually evolving from day to day. I express myself differently each day as I know that ultimately the person doing it is ME. Sure I talk about things as Richard or Ericka but those aspects are amalgamated and complementary to one another as neither is rigid or unyielding. While there used to be a "war" going on , there is no longer and I just express myself as to how I feel at the time. My friends know me as both , so it makes little difference to them because they know I'm the same person no matter what I look like.. Lily puts it well:"Comfortable in my own skin". Good place to be really.:happy: Rich

[Lovely Rita]

I admit that in my dressing there has always been a sexual undertone some times more than others. But there has always been something else. At one time it was a surogate for the person that wasn't in my life. At others it was the only way to sate a feeling i couldn't express as a man. Does dressing fill a hole in your life. Can you discribe it. Do you feel more complete as it becomes part of you.

I don't know if I can express what it all means adequately but my dressing definitely makes me whole.

[Rebecca_Annette]

I feel 'comfortable', I feel a better person, I feel I am me

[Alice Torn]

First, Lovely Rita, grrreat legs girl! I will be honest here, hopefully not too long winded. I started putting on my sisters clothes, at about 14, then, some of my momn's. It was definitely sexuzl experimenting, and, I was aroused by some women's clothes. I was shy, and had great ly low self worth, and confidence. I was taught as a little boy, that I should not talk to girls, that it was nasty. For many years, I saw pretty ladies, in magazines, or newaspapers, and fantasized, and until a year ago. Then, I got to rent a place, where a deceased lady, had left her clothes. I put on a lot of her dresses, and most were too small, but, a few fit, well enough. Then, later moved again, saw a nice dress, at a thrift shop, got the guts, to buy it, for a "ladyfriend". Then, bought more dresses, skirts, hose, dresses, tops, and a few used thrift shop wigs Finally, founf high heels, on the internet, that fit me! Then, a delay switch camera. I do get thuned on by the lady in the mirror, and, I think it is a surrogate, for a real lady. I do masturbate, after being dressed for an hour or so. I often feel that i am playing both genders, when I do. I pretend, that some one(my male side), or some other guy, is dancing, hugging, carressing me, then bedding me. But, I feel that I am often in love wuth the lady in the mirror. I often feel guilt after, as I always have, after masturbating, anytime. I don't feel the urge to dress up, so often, lately, and my sex drive is almost nill. I tend to be very tired after doing it, and I have heard, that male sexual release, can take energy away. I work to be a better male, when in that mode, which is most of the time. I am out of work, and dressing up, is on the back burner, now. Lucille

[jo_ann]

I have many motivating factors
1. sexual
2. escape from stress (I'm not me, I'm some woman with not a care in the world
3. fullfill a missing need.. My mom divorced my dad when I was 12, didn't have a girlfriend until I was 23, even now my wife doesn't dress very femminine, so you might say I'm catching up with lost time.

[soccervixen]

for me, there was an initial sexual feeling to it - but that lasted all of about a week at most. Now, it is just enjoyment, and exploration of this side of me which enjoy the feminine in a society where gender roles are pretty clear (at least in my sub-culture). I can't say it is filling a need, but a desire I want to explore.

[diane59]

In the very beginning there was some sexual gratifacation to dressing, but as i got older it has become more of a drug to me, When I'm dressed en femme, I feel so relaxed and at ease. It's really part of who I am.
Stefanie

Ditto!

[Danigyrl29]

I find it to be mostly a sexual thing. I love women and want to be with women. I do however find myself looking at women in the mall etc. and thinking about how to look like them or where they got that dress etc. I have to tell my wife that I am not interested in them, I am interested in their look...the look that I want too.

I think I am about 70/30 on the issue. 70% sexual, 30% some other unknown reason/hobby/need for femininity.

[Bluebird GG]

from a gg's point of view dressing for a cd'er is not just a statement its a way of life, so its all good!:thumbsup:

[gennee]

It was sexual in the very beginning. When I came out to myself, I felt complete and liberated. I'm very content with who I am.

Gennee:happy:

[reneeisy]

For me I think crossdressing is 100% a sexual experience. It's just the way I feel when getting dressed and working on my makeup until I have it just right and ready to go out.

[Michelle 51]

It use to be always sexual but as i went pass lingerie and started to wear heel's full dresses etc it very seldon is sexual and i just like to dress and lounge around and enjoy the feeling sometime for hours where as when it was sexual it was do it and get it over with and go do something else. I do regret the time i spend dressing now because i can waste hrs just doing nothing but clicking my heels around the house.O well i'll do it tomorrow well maybe i'll do it tomorrow. I wait and see how i feel. Justabit

[franvonceder]

I think you've got it about right Danigyrl29. I certainly find it 75% sexual; I love woman watching and enjoying being with them. There is that certainly something in my makeup that drives me to want to look like an attractive woman but not to attract a man.

Fran

[bgirl]

Sometimes there is this amazing calm that comes over me when I dress. A deep sigh and all is right with the world, content and complete. That is the part I like best.
Sometimes it is sexual and frantic. Allthough I like the exitement part of this, I would take the amazing calm everytime if given the choice. There is a desire to dress and I go with the mood of the day. Today its a deep sigh day, so far. Truly,Beth

[Joyciecd]

No doubt about it, as I transform into Joycie I become as a female. When out as Joycie, I like to be going to a date, be it daytime or evening. If I am just out for shopping etc., I flirt shamelessly every chance I get. When I am Joycie at home, I have a steady stream of femmy thoughts and like to call my boyfriends and have 'those' chats, which I find to be very sensual. When on a date, my behavior leaves no doubt where I want the date to lead, and I have met so many guys that like to be with a CD that I never lack for company, if I want it. I have a few 'steadies' that I see almost weekly that know how to treat a girl like Joycie, wine and dine, little gifts, larger gifts at Christmas, etc. Despite the plumbing, Joycie is all woman!