I told my first person today

[tall_brianna]

I didn't really intend to, it just happened. He's gay, I've known him for six years and all he has ever known - what everyone else outside of people that I've met here and elsewhere as Brianna know - is the scruffy guy with over the top boy antics (read: overcompensating). We went to lunch and we got on the subject of his partner who came out at a late age, 10 years younger than I am now, and how much that messes you up mentally. I practically, no, did, burst out in tears, "Yeah, I know."

He's a really good person. After the initial shock we talked and he made me feel really at ease. It was easy with him because he understands. The next time will be much harder I know.

It's a start. A small step forward to living without secrets. His advice was don't get too overwhelmed by the sense of freedom and go telling everyone just yet. Most people don't deserve to know. Just drop the facade and not work so hard at being an a-hole and people will start to just figure it out.

I so want to thank everyone here. I know I've been posting a lot in the last week and ticking some off, but reading and corresponding with a lot of you has given me the courage and will power to do this life without secrets and lies thing. A special thanks to TreeGG, your "load of BS" really made me angry but also made me think. If I hadn't had that heated exchange this morning I wouldn't have been worn down enough to ever let it go.

-b

[fiona_libby]

Hi Brianna

I am glad that you took the step, it is a step I am trying to make myself and I have come so close on a lot occasions and it just cannot be done at the moment. I am hoping I can take courage from your success and bring about some changes in my life. So thank you and I hope I may be able to post a message like yours very soon.

hugs :hugs:

Fiona

[MJ]

hi bree
good you you Hun. i am proud of you i know it's hard i felt the same way but you only need tell real close friends for now until you become comfortable with your self i wish i could be there to give you a big hug :love: talk to you soon ....hugs

[Amy Hepker]

I have a friend and he was my friend for many years before I met my second wife. Well, my second wife (exwife now) after we had been married for about 5 years was trying to get me to stop dressing, so she said she was going to tell all my friends and family. I don't have that many friends because I have been screwed over by quite a few. Anyway I contacted the one she said she was going to tell and I told him. He is totally Hetrosexual and as I am, I could not believe he was totally accepting of me. He had seen me dressed a few years before at a Halloween Party. He is still my friend and has never once tried to blackmail me or give me any grief about it. He accually was supportive after telling him about what my wife was going to do to me. He has helped me many times with solving problems I was having with her. I do believe that most people that know you will not harrass you about it and may even help. If they are real friends they will still be real friends and these are the kind we need around.

[Lindsay Marie]

I remember when I told my first person. It was my stylist at the salon, my first trip in. I was getting my first pedicure and while she was working I asked if many guys got pedicures done and if so were they gay or hetro. She said "Yeah and we get both in, why are you gay and if so it's ok by us here" I paused for a second and said "I'm not gay but I am a crossdresser, and you're the first person I have ever told that to." She paused a second and said "Well that's a first for me too, it's a pleasure to meet you" I ended up deciding to get my toes polished and then used the opportunity to tell my parents. Telling that first person is hard but then it just gets easier from there, I have 6 people that know about Lindsay now the 4 girls at the salon and my parents. If I had to have decided on it though I most likely would have told my gay friend first though, who still doesn't know yet it just played out that my stylist found out first.

[sarah-smith]

congratulations! :D

its such a great feeling when you open out to people and they understand who you are! :happy:

[MJ]

i told my stylist and makeup artist at the salon. i went in with my new wig they do wig service so i took it over. talk about dumb i thought i would just drop it off and go back and pick it up. the sale's lady said oh no we do it on you.. i guess the look of horror on my face gave me away. she said you have never done this before have you. i said no.. she told me to come back dress up and they would put the layers in. that was a problem because i had never gone out in public before. well there is a first time for everything so i made an appointment and went in and got it done oh and got my makeup done too..
that was also the first time i did not get much change back from $150.00 welcome to womanhood ... hugs

[Billijo49504]

I've walked in those shoes. I told a few of my internet friends, and was really surprixed when they said "SO". That is besides my wife, who took the pictures for my avatar. It really blew my mind. I figured it would make a big difference and they siad it's just you. There are those relitives that I can't tell, but a lot of ppl now know. Hell, I might show up for my last day at work, in a dress, before I retire....BJ

[Phyliss]

"Spilling the beans" at your favorite salon/spa must be "the thing" lately. This past Wed I had my appt. for a pedicure (I go about every six weeks). I've been seeing her for about a year now and as we all know we can get very comfortable with some people. Well, since July I've been getting my toes painted. At first it was a very light pink, almost non-existant, but gradually I've gotten it darker each time. For some strange reason, this time I felt so comfortable and at ease with her the feelings just kinda fell out and I told her about myself. Not a single negative comment. In fact she allowed that she had sorta suspected but wasn't going to say anything until I spoke first. Now that there are no secrets I feel so much better.

MJ says,..."that was also the first time i did not get much change back from $150.00 welcome to womanhood ... "

I can relate to THAT. three weeks ago the owner of a dress shop I know opened up an hour early just for me. Dropped a bundle of $$$$$ when I sorta winced at the bill she said, "Welcome to the GIRLS WORLD" Kinda made me feel special and took away some of the hurt on my plastic.

[MJ]

hi Bre
just wanted you to know you inspired me to write my sister she knows a little and send her pictures she does not know i am on hrt or that i am going to go for surgery i am shaking here but i am going to do it thank you ...hugs

[AmberTG]

That's a really tough thing to do, I was scared when I told my wife, about 2 months into our relationship, way before we got married. I'm always on the edge of telling people, but my therapist told me not to just go dropping the bomb, go slowly with that, because you can't take it back once it's out of the box, and you might not want everyone to know until you're really ready for it.

[Joanna Renee']

Bre I told an old high school friend of mine back in January. He's gay and was since high school. It was a gutsy move but I was going through a rough emotional time and when we were talking we met for a drink I was wearing my undies under my male clothes. He said what's wrong and i said I have something to tell you and you will be shocked. And When I told him I felt like i was more a woman than a man he was speechless. He then asked how long and then he said even in school and i said yes We got together not too long ago and i was dressed and he again was speechless My next step is my family wish me luck.:love: Joanna Renee'