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View Full Version : Are you worried about indirect outing?



tall_brianna
11-04-2006, 04:08 AM
I know, I'm paranoid, it's a leftover byproduct, but sometimes I worry that I'm indirectly outing myself by posting too much information to this forum.

Knowing full well that if someone is trolling they are probably at least curious, I still worry. Part of that is the name. If you have a name like Tomisita anyone who knows you as Tom might connect easily. Plus all the details of postings.... Ahhh. :lame: but, I remember a circulation among friends ~4-5 years ago of a site that was a spoof of hot or not with TGs, I think it was called Male or *******. It was actually quite amusing. But ahhhhhh, there I am. Half laughing and half shaking right now.

Hopefully I can convince our wonderful moderators to allow a name change for peace of mind. I just want one place where I can be totally open and honest even if it's incognito (for the immediate future anyway).

And now for more TMI, I'm rambling on tangents because I went out drinking with friends tonight (completely male). I'm definitely feeling more at ease with myself. I think I even slipped in, "I love her top". :heehee: Heck, they're all cool - I doubt any of them would reject me although I do think that one of them would not have been so adamant that he "loved me" in his drunken haze :)

And furthermore!!... It is a bad idea to post after taking the piss (isn't that what they say in the uk).

Good night and thanks to everyone for a great experience.

hugs,

-b

p.s. and if one of my dear friends should stumble on this revalation, please, just ask me. From one coward to another, be brave and don't talk about it without me.

trannie T
11-04-2006, 04:15 AM
I really don't care that much anymore. I'm still hidden deeply in the closet but it would be no big deal if I were to be outed. I've given enough information about myself on this forum that someone who knows me could identify me.

Angela Burke
11-04-2006, 04:16 AM
I'm at the stage now where I don't care.
Whoopee!

Kate Simmons
11-04-2006, 06:12 AM
Not me Hon. If Alfred E. Neuman isn't worried, why should I be?:happy: Ericka/Rich

Charleen
11-04-2006, 06:27 AM
Nah, not worried. I have put out enough info on this site that I can be found. My avatar is how I dressed for Halloween, and the people I work with either saw me that nite, or asked to see a picture, which I did. The only comment I got was that I have great legs! As long as I don't show up at work like that, they don't care. As far as friends go, I have told a few, and they're cool with it, and I have no SO so that's not a problem. Love and xxxx,Lily

Tina Dixon
11-04-2006, 07:12 AM
Well my wife did find out about me a few months back, and I have leaked a few details of my real life here more and more along with many pictures, so I guess if I get outed I'll have to live with it.

Raychel
11-04-2006, 09:25 AM
I would really rather that my father did not find out. But as far as the rest of the world, I will deal with that if it happens.

Shannon CD
11-04-2006, 09:44 AM
My ex already outed me to everyone she could think of. I gues I just don't care at this point. If someone figures me out from here the first question I would have for them is why they were here in the first place.

Amy Hepker
11-04-2006, 09:56 AM
Anymore I truley believe that anyone who would give you grief is not happy in their own world and just want to ruin it for everyone else. They just are not in control of their own life and feel they can run someone elses by making them accountable. They don't deserve the time of day. I drive semi and believe that alot of people out there drive as if they are in control. They will pull out in front of a semi to be in control of that truck, it gives them power or so they think. Someday it catches up to them and they end up pushing up daisies because they pushed to hard and found out the hard way.

Karren H
11-04-2006, 10:41 AM
Not worried... It will happen oneday! and the more your on here the more comphy you get the more info you release... Think I've put out way too much that you should be able to figure out everything except my SSI number. Lol

So who cares.....

Love Karren

SherriePall
11-04-2006, 10:49 AM
I'm not worried about here. Hopefully, the vetting process weeds out those who don't belong and some of you can smell a phony a mile away. And those casual visitors don't have complete access to everything here and besides they would have to be specifically looking for something. And if they found something, the question does come up: what were they doing on here or how did they find out about this site? Throw that back at them and see them squirm.
Now, out in the real world, a couple of GG SA's know both of me, but they know less about me than you do. Besides, they like my money.

Sedona
11-04-2006, 10:51 AM
Brian(na),

I understand your concerns. I'm kind of in your boat in that I try to stay troller-safe in my postings. I really don't think I've given enough info out to be outed, except perhaps for a couple of exes I've had who might recognize a story or two, or could say, "Hey, that birthmark and set of shoulders looks awfully familiar, hmm, I wonder if it's _______" Do I worry too much? Yes, I think. Should I worry? Nah, probably not.

<edit> If you want to have your user name here changed, contact an admin (Sharon or Tamara) via PM and make the request. You may want to check the member list to make sure the new name you've selected is not already being used</edit>
Best,

Cristi
11-04-2006, 11:11 AM
I'm still just a bit cautious about the details I post and wonder if somebody local could put all the clues together and figure out who I am. It IS a small town, after all!

But when I get past the anxiety of being 'outed' I wonder what it would really mean. I'm sure I'd get talked about behind my back, perhaps a few unwelcome comments... but then? Probably not much.

So in reality, though I get nervous about it happening, I really don't think it would be much more than a 'Did you hear that....?' event that would fade away after a week or so.

I was speaking to a woman I work with the other day and she mentioned that a guy from her previous job was gay and a CD. She was perfectly OK with it and got a kick out of the fact that they used to bitch together about how difficult it was to find a comfortable pair of heels. :) What I found funny about it is that he has the same job titel that I do... perhaps my specific job attracts CDs? :)

Sweet Jane
11-04-2006, 01:01 PM
Hi

I do have an irrational fear of being outed by what I post on here, but at the same time the pictures I post do not really look like me....at least the me that everybody knows. I wont post where I live...and I won't use my "real" name either. The world is a fairly large hiding place!!!!

I would be mortified if I was found out..but I suppose the sun would still rise tomorrow.

Annette_boy
11-04-2006, 01:12 PM
Hi Ladys
I guess the trip to jail and the rescue by my friends cured me of worring about folks knowing about me though I would rather not have my 81 year old mother know I think she has suspected all my life but I do not want to rub it in the rest of the world Hi my name is Annette and I am a boy under all the girlie clothes
Love and Kisses to all
Annette XXXXXOOOOO

kerrianna
11-04-2006, 01:15 PM
Hmm, I realize now I don't really care too much. I have gone from being super-safe to WTF. Almost like I want to be outed so I can just be me. Life's too short to spend it hiding and worrying about what others think. :Peace:

Han
11-04-2006, 01:19 PM
I thought about it. Then I thought, who the hell would be trolling these sites that would know me. If I did know them, then why are they looking on these forums in the first place.

Chances are, you are more likly to indirectly out yourself to your best mate who is looking to out himself too.

Blonde
11-04-2006, 01:32 PM
I am paranoid too about being outted, and know it is just a paranoid feeling.
But....Part of my location WAS guessed by a member here through what I had posted....AND at a family dinner la couple of nights ago, I heard that my niece's BF went dressed en-fem to work for halloween..... So for those of us parinoids, it does "pay" to try and be careful.

Jen.A
11-04-2006, 03:08 PM
Posting too much information or bad luck? I was found on this very forum, although I think it was mostly bad luck and a little careless planning it still happened. My little world here received a gash and started leaking into the rest of my life. At work I'd hear one thing after another, comments related to posts I made just earlier, subtle but very direct in a way, I was lucky with the cards but I was found theres no doubt about it. At that point I had a lot of questions I wanted to ask like how did it happen and who knows, things were out of my hands and I was starting to picture people in my family reading my posts. My boss knew and he drinks with my uncle, great!


Lets be real, if you are posting a picture of your face in the picture gallery your taking a risk, next to that unfortunately is your location. You can search members this way, its no longer possible without ten posts but still just as hard to hide when your on the list.


The world can be a very small place, if your posting something you probably shouldn't cause you need support or need to vent, your best not giving to many personal details.


Jen :)

Fallen Angel
11-04-2006, 03:30 PM
Ive made a few comments as well that have leaked out,But I know who the culprit is and I do think he/she has been banned any who and if there back under another name sooner or later they will be found out.

Im out any way so theres realy not much some one can due to hurt me any way
xxxxxxxxxx's
Im like wax fruit I dont bruse to easly.

AmberTG
11-04-2006, 03:47 PM
If I get found out, so be it. I get tired of hiding it, I mostly do it because of my fundamentalist father-inlaw who would make a really big stink with his twisted religous views.

KarenSusan
11-04-2006, 05:11 PM
The older I get the more I don't care. Besides, if someone is searching this forum and finds me out, what were they doing here?

MJ
11-04-2006, 05:18 PM
I thought about it. Then I thought, who the hell would be trolling these sites that would know me.
If I did know them, then why are they looking on these forums in the first place.
Chances are, you are more likly to indirectly out yourself to your best mate who is looking to out himself too.

hi there i am not worried if someone finds me here i would want to know what they were doig here. now they would out themself's

Kristi1948
11-04-2006, 05:24 PM
I have only partially outed you might say. At home I sit with the the door open and have had people come to the door (VERY scarey at first, but OOOOOOHHHHHH what a rush). I am NOT an exibitionist, but just sit and stare outside and wish I could be out there as dressed. I am not out at work as I know it would cost me my job. I work with nothing but (macho) men. At 58 I don't need to be looking for another job. LOL

sandra-leigh
11-05-2006, 05:13 AM
Indirect outing... I have written a lot of electronic technical material, and I suspect that my style and vocabulary and usual spelling mistakes are sufficient that I could be tracked by anyone who bothered to use an "author analysis" program.

The more I post here, the more I think it likely the one or more of you already knows of my public life, and may even have already put the names together.


I think a bit more about a more direct "outing": I have been so many places around the city partially en femme (recognizably me), or shopping for femme things, that someone is going to see eventually. I know for sure that my next-door neighbours have; fortunately they are cool people. And I am about 75% convinced that one of my neighbours two down has seen me shopping for nylons/tights (one time) and trouser-socks (different time, same place.) When you shop for womens' clothes in the department store two blocks from work, eventually someone you know will see!

There are relatively few people in the city that I am "hiding" my CD from.
- Work to some extent -- I would not get fired, but gossip can be cruel.
- My wife; fear that it might damage our relationship
- One of the nearby neighbours, who is old and not well and is going through a bad time. She has some definite opinions, and if it just so happens that one of them is about crossdressing then she might feel quite hurt, at a time when she doesn't need the trouble.

I'm not sure what my other next-door neighbours would think; they are kind of hard to read. I'd also prefer not damage my relationship with a couple of the other neighbours around, but someone I get the feeling that they would adapt. My intuition is that the ones I am thinking of wouldn't be too phased if I wore a skirt (that wasn't too short) when I was visiting them; a dress... it'd depend on the dress.

loki_uk
11-05-2006, 05:29 AM
I suppose my wife could find me online, but then why would she be looking unless you had her suspicions so not exactly a major concern, and probably not a bad way to be outed

RachelDenise
11-05-2006, 07:40 AM
I worry, but I would wonder about who found me here. I don't do photos and I've tried to be relatively anonymous in my location. If they can out me by my language and tales that I don't think most know, then they are CSI material!

Kelsy
11-05-2006, 09:03 AM
I've had this thought pass through my head! what if someone I knew called me Jennifer:eek:


Jennifer:eek:

Jillian310
11-05-2006, 10:05 AM
I recognize a tendancy by some of the above to rationalize being exposed in the least harmful ways. On the other hand, however, the event could be a lot more traumatic. I have outlined a more drastic event on the string Plan B. Which is the more realistic? I hope we never have to find out!

Eileen
11-05-2006, 11:00 AM
Brianna many of us do things ,without thinking, that could out us. I leave the house enfem and sooner or later as I am leaving someone I know will be pulling in the drive. When that happens, I will no longer worry about hiding!

Eileen

Country girl
11-05-2006, 03:12 PM
My ex already outed me to everyone she could think of. I gues I just don't care at this point. If someone figures me out from here the first question I would have for them is why they were here in the first place.

How sad that someone could be so vindictive. I know she is not the only one but there are a few of us GG's who would never think of wielding that knid of power. I sincerely appologize to you from the decent GG community. As far as the rest of you go I agree, if someone is on here trolling, they must have a reason!

:gh: Country girl GG

Billiesmith
11-05-2006, 03:36 PM
Hi All I am new to thie sight but have been xdressing for some time. I dont think any one I know would talk to me any more if thay knew. But I dont care much about then I just do not want my Dad to find out his son likes to dress as a woman. I am not ready to come out but I want to find friends that would understand and let me be me around them.
The more I dress the more I want to dress.
Will tell more when I wake up
Billiesmith

Laurie_Myles
11-06-2006, 08:48 PM
Shannon... your situation is the potential risk we take by revealing to our SO. So far, I have been fortunate in that the handful of people that know have not revealed to anyone else. Did she approve of and partake in your CDing while you were together?

Despite the risk, CDing is SO much more fulfulling and exciting with a supportive and participating SO! I cannot understand how so many gurls here do not tell their wives or SO's. They are missing out.

Laurie