Out and Down

[bgirl]

Okay, so I am out to my wife, I can dress at home(in private), my wife has seen me dressed and even went with me to a tri-ess picnic. I have everything I need to dress, I'm dressed right now. I have started to accept myself. I don.t feel dirty or guilty or feel like purging, and I'm not out of control or on a spiral in either direction. I should be so happy!

So why do I feel like something is mising? Why do I feel down?

Once again, please tell me I'm not alone.

[Theresa(TGirl)]

Have you ever went out while dressed? That may be it.

[tekla west]

Well, the devil damn me for saying so, but life IS about more than fashion and wardrobe.

I have found it to be important to make sure that all the areas of life (finances/career - spiritual - creative - family - sex - intellectual - physical - social) all have some sort of aspect that covers my fem side too. I to Tazie prayer as Tekla, I do some exersize that way too, I go out and dance the night away, I even found a way for the girl to make some money on the side, which lets her feel good about buying new clothes. I read girl stuff sometimes, Little Women is my favortite, but I try to keep up on major femminist lit too.

Sometime I think some of us, at least at some point, tend to overcompensate for time lost and short change all the aspects that make us functional.

[Gisele]

Okay, so I am out to my wife, I can dress at home(in private), my wife has seen me dressed and even went with me to a tri-ess picnic. I have everything I need to dress, I'm dressed right now. I have started to accept myself. I don.t feel dirty or guilty or feel like purging, and I'm not out of control or on a spiral in either direction. I should be so happy!

So why do I feel like something is mising? Why do I feel down?

Once again, please tell me I'm not alone.

To tell you the truth. You are NOT alone! I went through the same feelings that you are going through right now. Give it some time and keep at dressing. You will get through it and will be happy in the long run.

I use to dress and once I got my "urge" out of my system I could not get out of my clothes fast enough. I felt dirty and like a pervert. Now I have come to terms with my inner feelings and I love to be Beth as much as time will allow.
My fiance knows and also supports me. We go out as girlfriens at times and have a blast.
Just keep working at it and it will come to you. I promise.:love:
Beth

[ubokvt]

All through time men have been motivated by the [U]promise [U] of sex, not by sex but by the promise of the dreams. You dreamed of dressing now your out, its real, not a fantasy, part of your life, normal, so there will be some let down, but at the same time, the real fun begins now you can live it and begin to explore the reality of dressing and it will be just like life some days great, sometime boring, and most of the time just average. So dress and truly explore who you are not just the fantasy you dreamed it might be.

[SherriePall]

You have been out under a very controlled circumstance -- going to that Tri-ess picnic. You have dressed for your wife. What may be missing is actually going out among the general public -- shopping, eating, and doing those things which a GG takes for granted.
Just watch out, once you start, it's like eating potato chips: you just can't go out once.

[Scotty]

I get that way from time to time with no explanation.
I think that with the support of all you girls it's been wonderful, and my ex SO watched that montel show and has a better understanding of what I am going throuh (I still have to tread safely though and not push it too hard on her).....
Sometimes I step back and realize where I am now vs when I first came to this board - knowing I am not alone in this.

When those things happen it's uplifting for me because I can be who I am.
In fact her and I are going shopping for those executive bags in a bit :)

Maybe

[BeckyAnderson]

Okay, so I am out to my wife, I can dress at home(in private), my wife has seen me dressed and even went with me to a tri-ess picnic. I have everything I need to dress, I'm dressed right now. I have started to accept myself. I don.t feel dirty or guilty or feel like purging, and I'm not out of control or on a spiral in either direction. I should be so happy!

So why do I feel like something is mising? Why do I feel down?

Once again, please tell me I'm not alone.

Is it perhaps you are not getting vibes of support from your wife? I'm in a similar situation and even though I dress at home when she is there I still sense so much negativity eminating from her. This has a direct bearing on how I feel when I'm dressed. One of those feelings is that something is missing.

Just a thought.....

Hugs,
Becky

[Tina Dixon]

I'm thinking your looking for more and you know what it is but afraid to say it.

[GG Vanya]

Ever heard the song: The thrill is gone?

For many, the thrill of crossdressing is because it is forbidden or taboo.

Now that you're out to your wife, and even out to a Tri Ess meeting, maybe you miss the danger aspect of it all.

Look around you here on this forum at the CD's who would give 5 years off their life to be where you are now.

In fact, go back and read some of the threads where the CD came out to their wife with disasterous results. If that's not enough to drag you off the pity pot, then shame on you.

Harsh? yep, it could be taken that way. But sometimes being blunt is what it takes to open one's eyes to the things they should be joyous about.

Pick yourself up by your sling-back straps and go hug your wife, tell her how much you love her and how grateful you are for her understanding.

[Nigella]

:2c: FWIW

It may not be a CDing reason that you are down, most of the post here assume that is it, but only you can tell.

Tekla hit the nail on the head, sub-consciously you may have other things going on that gives you that down feeling. Find out what that is and you may start to feel better in yourself.

[bgirl]

In fact, go back and read some of the threads where the CD came out to their wife with disasterous results. If that's not enough to drag you off the pity pot, then shame on you.

Harsh? yep, it could be taken that way. But sometimes being blunt is what it takes to open one's eyes to the things they should be joyous about.

Pick yourself up by your sling-back straps and go hug your wife, tell her how much you love her and how grateful you are for her understanding.

Tuff love, I admit. Once again I fall victum to the human capcity to overlook the worst of it. I wouldn't have called it self pity, but in fact you are correct.

And... I never let a day go buy that don,t tell my wife that I love her. I often tell her how lucky I am to have her. Her acceptance of this is ever proof of that and yes I tell her that too. Thanks for your insight. Beth

[bgirl]

my ex SO watched that montel show and has a better understanding of what I am going throuh (I still have to tread safely though and not push it too hard on her).....


When I read your post, I visualized your SO watching the montel show but when you said her...well I had been picturing a man. Iv'e started relating to the girls here as women!! Imagine that!

I like having sisters.