Question For The GGs

[Brianna Lovely]

Recently I was watching a rerun of a Law & Order episode. The story line was about a man who had been suspected of killing his wife. The man was so harassed by the media, that he changed his name and was living as a woman.

The thing that struck me was when the District Attorney (male) and the ADA (female) are walking through the courthouse and she says "You know, Cross-Dressing is worse than murdering someone".

Ok, so I'm asking the GGs of this forum, because they're in touch with so many "straight" GGs in society.

It seems to me, that society thinks that the worst people in the world are,
(1) CrossDressers, (2) Gay people, (3) child molesters, (4) Terrorists, (5) murderers

What is so upsetting about a man who wears women's clothing?

[GG Vanya]

Well personally I think that statement is preposterous, if she meant it literally. Perhaps she was making reference to the deceit factor. But even then I don't agree. I realize the story was fiction, but I can imagine a DA or ADA being angry that he had changed his identity and thereby was escaping the scorn they felt he was due.

CD's wouldn't even make my list, here's mine:

Child molesters because they prey on the helpless innocents.

"Hawk" gay men, because they only desire and prey on/convert the virgins, which then sometimes results in young men who live a life wishing they were dead.

Rapists, for the same reasons. (can't believe I omitted this one)

Terrorists because they are multiple murderers and think it is their (pick which ever God they serve)-given right to be so.

Murderers, unless it's in self defense, then they won't make this list at all.

Spouse abusers and I think this needs no explanation.

Some might not agree with my priorities here, but know that I have my reasons for them.

[Joy Carter]

I'm sorry but do let me chime in here. I have known many a molestation victim in my official capacity as a police officer. The victim got a life sentence from the perpetrator. They may never be normal or in most cases react to another in an normal intimate way. On short their life is destroyed. I think a molester of any sort should pay the same price by having his life permanently disrupted with a like sentence of life. For someone who touches a child then I suggest the death penalty just so he never gets the chance to get out and repeat his crime. :Angry3: :Angry3: :Angry3:

[GG Vanya]

Joy I agree. That is why I put child molesters at the top of the list. In my foggy morning thought process I neglected to include molesters in general.

[CaptLex]

"Hawk" gay men, because they only desire and prey on/convert the virgins, which then sometimes results in young men who live a life wishing they were dead.
You know, Vanya, some straight guys do this too.

I agree that child molesters are the worst of the worst (and, of course, crossdressers don't belong anywhere near that list). What I don't understand is why pedophilia is considered a paraphilia - it should just be considered criminal. I recently did some research on fetishes and paraphilia and was surprised to learn that it's on the list. I know it's a mental disorder (to put it mildly), but it shouldn't be on the same list as people who are into leather or uniforms - not to mention crossdressing. No wonder they think we're all mental. :thumbsdn:

[Marianna]

I agree with all that molesters (male and female) should have thier lives totally disrupted. Next would be terrorist, I lost some friends in 9/11 and as far as I am concerned they need to shipped somewhere in a box and never let out. Next would be murderers, rapists, and people that prey on the elderly and innocent. Just my :2c:

[Brianna Lovely]

"What is so upsetting about a man who wears women's clothing?"

To me, it's akin to:
(P1) I hate (blank)!
(P2) Why do you hate (blank)?
(P1) Because they are (blank).
(P2) Have you ever met a (blank)?
(P1) NO!

[renee99]

What I don't understand is why pedophilia is considered a paraphilia - it should just be considered criminal.

People can't help what their fetishes are. They are only in control of how they act on them. Criminalizing the thought process does not prevent the crime, simply because we don't have enough police and prisons to jail everyone who ever considers doing something harmful to another.

[GG Vanya]

Brianna,

Sorry I didn't answer exactly as you asked it. But you see I can't answer it that way, as I don't see anything upsetting about a man wearing the clothing of a female.

To get your answer, you'd likely have to visit a forum entitled: Haters of Crossdressers, A community for haters, their family and friends.

[Stacy GG]

Brianna,
I'd love to know the answer to this. The closest I can get it a quote from my school paper(which I think is an unfair standard) " Women can wear men's boxers and it's cute, men wear..well real men just don't. It's sexy when a hot chick wears guys clothes. If a man does the same thing, she's calling the cops and asking for a restraining order." Ram Page - Angelo State University

[Brianna Lovely]

I understand your difficulty in answering this question. I just thought that through your social contacts, throughout your life, you would be able to shed a little light on the subject.

As far a child-molesting goes, that's a very touchy subject for me. You see, I live in the Wacko State.

Example: A 19 year old collage student moons some players of the loosing football team. He is issued a summons for indecent exposure.
Fast forward to last year.
A hurricane is heading to his area, so a 38 year old man, his wife and his two children go to the nearest hurricane shelter. They are turned away by police, because he is listed as a "Sexual Offender". (Under Florida law, there is no distinction between a child rapist and a collage prankster). Also, his family may not go to the shelter by themselves, because of his Sexual Offender status. In Florida you're on the Sexual Offender List, for life, no exceptions.

[GG Vanya]

I understand totally Brianna, as Trudi and I used to live in Tampa Bay.

I've told the story of the man and woman who were in a bitter divorce/custody battle in FL. Her savvy lawyer put him on the stand and asked if he'd ever engaged in oral sex with the wife. He answered yes. (Oral sex is a felony in FL) He was immediately arrested, right there in court for having just confessed to a felony.

Of course, the wife had been advised if cross examined to plead the 5th, which she did.

The result was that the man will forever be on the "list" in FL, and not only did he lose custody, he lost all rights to even see his children except for supervised visitation.

I even have mixed feelings about this case, as the man is wealthy and was using his money to the fullest extent to play dirty pool in the divorce. The only reason he was fighting for custody to begin with was so he wouldn't have to pay precious $ for child support. I guess he got his wish in that regard.

[Iniquity Blonde GG]

ok.... i was marrried to someone for seven years. for six of those years i suffered domestic violence. put in hospital etc etc. when i met my b/f , i didnt know he c/d. he told me after wed known each other over fifthteen months. to be what i suffered being married, and c/d ?? narh, id know which id choose. and just because he c/d, he's still the same man i met/fell in love with. but.... if u had a convo with someone else , and said "oh i was married to someone who beat me up, they would say oh dear thats awful, he must have had other problems. BUT if you said, well im really happy , and my b/f /hubby c/d ... :eek: they would say "god thats disgusting u shouldnt be with him blah blah ".
people are scarred of what they dont understand, or DONT want to understand +?

[Brianna Lovely]

people are scarred of what they dont understand, or DONT want to understand +?

I'm afraid that I'm inclined to agree with you. I guess we're still in the cave-man days, kill or destroy anything that you don't understand.

Just my feelings, but I think that I'm "more of a man" then most men.
I can fight with the best of them, if need be, but I'd rather wear a dress. I can fix a car or cook the dinner.
Recently a man made a comment about my long/colored finger nails, saying that I couldn't make a fist to defend myself. Well, I looked him straight in the eye, and said "Then I'll just have to bit*h slap you, honey". He stepped back a bit, smiled and walked away.

I think that the average TG person has much to offer, in any relationship.

[Sandra]

What is so upsetting about a man who wears women's clothing?


Worry that something is wrong with you "the GG" and not being able to understand because sometimes it is not explained well enough.

[Kerry Owens]

In the homeless community the younger members learn quickly enough of the "chickenhawks". Although I never heard it referred to solely the homosexual adults.

[Vicky_Scot]

ok.... i was marrried to someone for seven years. for six of those years i suffered domestic violence. put in hospital etc etc. when i met my b/f , i didnt know he c/d. he told me after wed known each other over fifthteen months. to be what i suffered being married, and c/d ?? narh, id know which id choose. and just because he c/d, he's still the same man i met/fell in love with. but.... if u had a convo with someone else , and said "oh i was married to someone who beat me up, they would say oh dear thats awful, he must have had other problems. BUT if you said, well im really happy , and my b/f /hubby c/d ... :eek: they would say "god thats disgusting u shouldnt be with him blah blah ".
people are scarred of what they dont understand, or DONT want to understand +?

I just read your post and it is spot on. Then I read it out to my wife and she agreed. She would rather have me, a loving man who treats her with affection and respect and oh dresses than a human being who abuses them physically or in any other manner.

The sad thing is that crossdressers are seen by many as being Gay, a child molester, a weirdo or a pervert. I also think that society looks on rapists and murderers with less revultion than they do crossdressers. The media certainly is to blame a lot for portraying us in this manner also.

I am very proud of who I am and all other men who cd should hold their heads high. Remember there is a lot worse thing we could be than crossdressers.

xx

[kittypw GG]

For me the crossdressing is really not seen as weird or strange by itself. It is the fact that a lot of crossdressers have mood swings, unbalanced lives, tend toward the obsessive and have unrealistic views of women in general. Notice that I did not say all. I have heard of some that actually live "normal" lives with everything in proportion like priorities, mundane everyday tasks, being male, and fitting in time to be all of the other tittles people hold in their lives. Like father , husband, Employee etc. When someone is unbalanced and hard to live with well it is really hard not to see the crossdressing as one of the main problems with that person or part of a bigger problem. Balance should be the goal of every individual wether or not you are into crossdressing. Kitty

[Brianna Lovely]

When someone is unbalanced and hard to live with well it is really hard not to see the crossdressing as one of the main problems with that person or part of a bigger problem. Balance should be the goal of every individual wether or not you are into crossdressing. Kitty

I think you really touched on something here. And looking back on my life, I think I've done all the right things, in being married, raising children and on the job, I've always appeared to be the most balanced person you could meet. But, the truth is, I was always struggling with who I felt I was, inside. Luckily I believe that all people are in a constant state of change, whether they realize it, or admit it, does not matter, we are all changing.

Luckily, I was able to look at my feelings and admit that I did not know what they were or what they ment, but I accepted them and therefore accepted myself.

[Sheila]

I'm sorry but do let me chime in here. I have known many a molestation victim in my official capacity as a police officer. The victim got a life sentence from the perpetrator. They may never be normal or in most cases react to another in an normal intimate way. On short their life is destroyed. I think a molester of any sort should pay the same price by having his life permanently disrupted with a like sentence of life. For someone who touches a child then I suggest the death penalty just so he never gets the chance to get out and repeat his crime. :Angry3: :Angry3: :Angry3:


:iagree: as the mum of a child who has been molested there is nothing o n gods earth that society can do to make anything better for my child, her brothers or me as her mum. Molesters of anybody require the same treatment.


Brianna,
what on earth makes you put crossdressing as no! on your list let alone on it ????????????????

[Brianna Lovely]

:
Brianna,
what on earth makes you put crossdressing as no! on your list let alone on it ????????????????

Because I've spent many years observing people's reactions to the word "Cross-Dresser".
It's like the reactions,
Statement: Joe is an ax murderer.
Reaction: Oh my, that's terrible!
Statement: Bob is gay.
Reaction: Oh no, I hate fags.
Statement: Fred is a child molester.
Reaction: They should kill him
Statement: Sam pretends to be Sally, he's a cross dresser.
Reaction: Oh my God, NO, hide the children, lock the doors, call the police!

My original post wanted to know why so many GGs react so negatively to CDs.

I really don't think they know why it upsets them so.

[Tamara Croft]

All posts in this thread that are 'off topic' have been removed. This is the question - What is so upsetting about a man who wears women's clothing? If you can't answer that, then don't post, it's quite simple. Anymore off topic posts will be deleted.

[JoAnnDallas]

It has been used in dirty politics, such as the Congressonial race over in Ft. Worth TX, where the forrunner was discovered to be a CDer and the other side used it to win the election.

[Nigella]

Because I've spent many years observing people's reactions to the word "Cross-Dresser".
It's like the reactions,
Statement: Joe is an ax murderer.
Reaction: Oh my, that's terrible!
Statement: Bob is gay.
Reaction: Oh no, I hate fags.
Statement: Fred is a child molester.
Reaction: They should kill him
Statement: Sam pretends to be Sally, he's a cross dresser.
Reaction: Oh my God, NO, hide the children, lock the doors, call the police!

My original post wanted to know why so many GGs react so negatively to CDs.
I really don't think they know why it upsets them so.

I'm afraid you may be asking the wrong GGs here. Most on this forum either accept a "bloke in a frock" or are trying hard to. TBH those who don't understand or "cant" accept are more than likely following the shepherd, like little lost sheep. Where you lead I will follow.

[mona lisa]

...the character on the show was exaggerating for effect? (Did not see it so I cannot say.)

[27th Jennifer]

If there was something wrong with it, then how did hair metal get so big in the 80's, and how David Bowie EVER manage to sell so many albums? People seem to make a big deal about things that they either don't understand, or things they might have deep issues with themselves.

[carla smith]

1. She thought that i was mentally ill, and needed help.

2. Was hurt because she did not think that I loved her anymore.

3. I had nicer clothes than her. :heehee: just kidding!

There was more, but these are the main things she was upset about.

[mylitta]

Recently I was watching a rerun of a Law & Order episode. The story line was about a man who had been suspected of killing his wife. The man was so harassed by the media, that he changed his name and was living as a woman.

The thing that struck me was when the District Attorney (male) and the ADA (female) are walking through the courthouse and she says "You know, Cross-Dressing is worse than murdering someone".

Ok, so I'm asking the GGs of this forum, because they're in touch with so many "straight" GGs in society.

It seems to me, that society thinks that the worst people in the world are,
(1) CrossDressers, (2) Gay people, (3) child molesters, (4) Terrorists, (5) murderers

What is so upsetting about a man who wears women's clothing?

I really don't know. As a gg who has just recently found out about her man, I have had to take a close look at my own reactions, and think about those of others. My reaction- first I was upset, but then thought, okay it seems weird to me, but there are a lot worse things he could be doing- he's not doing anything illegal or immoral, he's not cheating on me, not hurting anyone. But I still don't know why society reacts with such revulsion. We fear what we don't understand, perhaps. There is no logic behind it- but then there is no logic behind a lot of society's mores. So sorry- this is not a lot of help really, except that the more people know about it the more accepted it will become.

[surc777]

Part of it is, I think, that the outside view of crossdressers is to assume several things:

1. That we are gay.
2. That we all dress as women, all of the time.
3. That all crossdressers are flamboyant drag queens.
4. That we are so insecure with ourselves as men that we have to pass ourselves off as something we are not.
5. That we are wimps.

Of course the responses in order would be:

1. More corssdressers are straight than not.
2. Most of us could not pull off being dressed all the time, whether we want to or not.
3. Most of us AVOID drawing attention to ourselves when dressed, and would prefer to pass and blend normally.
4. This one I leave to the psychiatrists. Perhaps some truth to this for some of us. (I know it is probably true to a certain degree for me)
5. I am a 6' 3", 215lb man with a 2nd degree black belt in Tae Kwon Do, 2nd degree black belt in Chinese Boxing, who was the youngest certfied instructor in the state, and trained under a national champion fighter. Perhaps we like to play the sissy sometimes, but I defy anyone to call me one to my face :tongueout

Just my :2c: