life as a crossdresser

[saskia]

All you girls seem so happy here my life has been anything but, started a journey at about nine wearing moms underwear and feeling the electric pulse when you put on pantyhose for the first time!!! Two marriages later, numerous purges and then the excitement of building a new wardrobe, alcoholism, but still the urge to dress in female attire WHY?????
Have any other girls felt the same torment or do the just secumb to the desire to be oneself ( I am doing that at the moment by my self and when home from work into a hot bath with bubble bath, then into a pair of panties and matching bra. possibly a dress and blouse then to the kitchen to prepare dinner. how nice it feels!! a counsellor once told me it was me trying to escape from my male role full of stress, get dressed, then I am not kevin any longer but Saskia with a different life..... do others feel any way similar
By the way love this place :hugs:

[Penny]

Crossdressing: the escape from which there is no escape. If handled properly, crossdressing can be great therapy. Conversely, it can be a nightmare.

[missattitude]

Well, I am to young to have been threw any marriages because of my crossdressing, I have found places like this to go to make me feel better as a person to deal with my life. I have been wearing womens clothnig since I was 3 or 4. I am now 22. Wasted the better part of my up untill recently, on drugs and beer because of a lot of things. One can only judge on why he or she does things, not threw stress, or guilt and shame, but because we all like certian things and that is the way things are. The sooner people can accept who they are, they no longer have to feel bad whatever. I LOVE crossdressing and would never change that fact of my life even if I had the chance to. It is part of me, and I can't wait to explore more of my Sexuality.

Miss Thangz

[saskia]

Thank you miss thangz
Your thoughts are really welcome I cannot stop crossdressing I love it also I love to look at the clothes on the rack at shops would rather buy girls jeans than mens they fit better but zip is other way around.. I love cooking (feminine trait) so you enjoy what you are doing I waited 40 years to be able to enjoy Hugs and Kisses Saskia

[missattitude]

It was either accecpt what I am and hold my head up high, or drink my life away and run from it all my life. As like you, I love to stare at females because I get jealous that they look so dam good, but then again , I aint to far away when fully in drag. I have legs to die for, lol, that is another story. Anyways... Just love what you do for you.. Pleasing yourself is the first thing that ALL crossdressers need to do.. Who gives a dam what people think. I dont.

Miss thangz

[cathie]

The challenges for me were when I was not honest with myself or with partners. I am on my second marriage but I also told my second wife of me wearing pantyhose. She naturally assumed there was more than just pantyhose and I agreed with her at that point.

I also became honest to myself. At first it was merely a sexual experience for me and I'd change the minute I was "done" but I'd find myself changing back into "things" an hour later or sooner. So I decided to stay dressed as long as it didn't hurt my family.

I'm fortunate to be married to my best friend and the most amazing woman I've ever met, my soul mate. I'm also lucky that I'm a stay at home dad. So I get the opportunity to dress all day at home until the kids come home from school. I'll change out of the dresses and heels but usually leave the pantyhose on under a pair of jeans.

I also battled the bottle for years too but that was because I realized was not happy with who I was in life. That comes from other ways. Some find religion some find help thru sites like this, remember you are not alone. We're all hear to listen and try to help.

For me, my outlet became athletics again. Just finding something that makes you happy on the inside as much as on the outside. I can wear my skirts and hose all day and be happy or ride a bike and run with nail polish on and be happy too. I just can't ride or run 5 miles in the 4" heels.

Some people need more help to understand. Maybe a therapist and not the massaging kind. There are a lot of therapists in most cities that are CD/TG/TS friendly. Most won't try to change who you are but help you understand why you do what you do. Cross dressing is only wrong because people see it as different than who they are in life. That's their problem. People need to be more open minded in life. It's the person inside that is important to judge not the outside. It's not wrong, you just need to understand you better and be happy with that person.

[Charleen]

Hi Saskia and welcome. My story is like yours except for the divorces. Dressing young, alcoholism(clean and sober over 23 years), couldn't figure out why I had to dress in woman's clothes, purging, ect.. I just knew I had too. I then came across this site and got my answers! I know now that I have no choice, and because of the great people on this site I've become comfortable with that and finally accepted who I am. Like you I am alone as my wife passed last year, so I have the freedom at home to be who I am, and that is extending to my every day life. Going en femme on my days off, panties and hose at least at work. Stick around. You're going to learn alot here. Love and xxxx, Lily