Are we ?

[CassieW]

Are we really free? We have to hope for an understanding SO that will accept us for who we are. When we get the encouragement,but we still hide in a way, fear of being found-out.Your SO love's you you for you and only you no matter what you like to wear,but you still have those nagging fears. Do you like the cold weather so you can be what you want but still hide? Society really sucks, when they keep people from being who we really are!When will we really be able to be ourselves, with no reprocussions? I don't know about anyone else, but I get sick of the closeminded SOB'S that make it hard for the people that are a little different from themselves.

Huggs,
Cassie

[Kate Simmons]

The time is now Cassie. Ignore the idiots. You have to be in control of your own destiny. I am. I couldn't wait for things to "change" and if you do, they never will. The time to enjoy being yourself is right now. :happy: Ericka

[GG Vanya]

In my opinion, the only thing stopping you from being free is your fear of those repercussions you mention.

[Deidra Cowen]

I'm not free due to needing to make a living and to take care of my kids when I have them over...but I am pretty happy with what I have arrived at. Guy at work and while I have the kids. Then I convert over to Tgirl on free weekends and a lot of evenings.

Right now once da kids are outta college I will be 50. Might just go FT at that point which I think is a good age for still having a lot of fun. I would not need the big income then and could probably find a job here in liberal Atlanta where I could be a woman. Who knows...just dreamin!

But don't give up or get discouraged babe! Lots of people are not free these days in this nutty economy where the object is for 'the man' to load us all up with lots of debt buying big houses, even bigger SUVs and lots of crud to keep up with everyone else...then working like dogs to keep up with it all.

Opppss...commy Deidra on da loose ....will chill now. :tongueout

[Karren H]

No one's free.....dressed or not!!! That's a democracy! Rules and bounds.....but you learn to live within them as best you can!! I do! and I'm not complaining about it, just out there having fun and enjoying my enfemme self!!! Life's too short to get bent out of shape over things......... I'd rather go shopping enfemme!!!!!!!!! hehehe

Love Karren

[Calliope]

We have to hope for an understanding SO that will accept us for who we are.

Self-actualization is a solitary trip. No mate will ever bring out your best, it's up to you. When you're ready to live your life as you please even if you never find a mate (or end up in another town, or accept a disappointing job, whatever), then you're free.

[lela]

Society doesn't have a clue about us. Until society is brought out of the darkness about cross dressing we will always be battered verbally, and looked at as freaks. Believe it or not, there are psychologists out there who have come to the conclusion that we were in fact born this way. They call it inappropriate androgenation of the brain. Something that is suppose to happen at a precise time in the womb, but misfires leaving us with male bodies, but female tendencies. It happens in girl babies too. We are not freaks of nature, and we are not sick people. If you would go to a reputable psychologist and ask to be cured of your cross dressing desires, they'd say we cure diseases, you don't have a disease. We were born this way, and until society gets educated on this subject, I'm afraid widespread acceptance will be a long time coming.

[hotbobbie]

It is up to us to change how people think of us. We have made big strides but still have a long way to go but we will get there. Each one of us must be true to ourselves and live our lives to its fullest and then and only then will we reach our goal.

[Iniquity Blonde GG]

if we were all free, wed loose our identies. having something "secret" adds something to ur persona. yet "freedom" is given to low lifes who walk free for harming people/children/animmals !! c/d must be one of the hardest things u HAVE to keep secret for all sorts of reasons. but then think of it as well from SO's side. we have to keep it secret from family/friends as well. it isnt something u can just go and talk to anybody about if their is a problem between the SO and c/d . sometimes u sit and wanna run and scream @ top of ur voice for help, when often as not ur crying ur eyes out, because u carnt talk to anyone, confide in someone.
yes true, if soceity allowed c/d to be accepted, then alot of other barriers would be brought down +? who knows +? its catch 22 really . damned if you do, damned if you dont :rolleyes:

[Shelly Preston]

Freedom is an illusion

We all do the best within the rules we set ourselves and others too

All we can do is support each other

[Amy Hepker]

Well I wil say this, I do live in fear that someday my SO will have had enough of it and leave. I do not have any indications of this as of yet and hope and pray that I never do. But I have been in this before with a GG and got burned big time. I do know that the GLady I am with now is completely different, but it will a;ways be in the back of my mind that she may leave someday.

As for everyone who is against crossdressing, I don't think it is us they fear, but the fear to be labeled themselves. They don't want everyone talking about them being with a crossdresser. These people are not stable in their own world and can't accept us as we are. It's not fair that we have to hide ourselves, but do we really want to drag others into our world. I know we don't mean to, but if they know us, and then we turn out to be crossdressers, we are dragging them into our world. That is, if others know they are our friends and relatives, then they are part of our world. The crossdresser world, even if they don't crossdress.

Yes, it can be a cruel world. What about the people with disablities, what about people who don't look good enough to others (ugly). The world is not accepting of people that don't fit the norm. Wars have been started because of this kind of thinking.

[MJ]

In my opinion,
the only thing stopping you from being free is your fear of those repercussions you mention.

Vanya stole my answer .. fear is the biggest problem. just let go your fear. and go out have fun ..hugs

[Lauren B]

Self-actualization is a solitary trip. No mate will ever bring out your best, it's up to you. When you're ready to live your life as you please even if you never find a mate (or end up in another town, or accept a disappointing job, whatever), then you're free.

Quoted for truth.

[Kelsy]

Society doesn't have a clue about us. Until society is brought out of the darkness about cross dressing we will always be battered verbally, and looked at as freaks.


I think alot of society , More than we know are into cding and don't want it exposed. Some of the worst homaphobes have homosexual tendencies!! It's uncomfotable for them because It strikes to close to home!!

Jennifer

[Sasha Anne Meadows]

Hi girls!

We may not be free because society as a whole does not accept us. But accepting ourselves sets us free. We each struggle with our own situations. But just understanding and embracing who we are is just wonderful. Love each other you beautiful sisters.

Sasha Anne

[GypsyKaren]

The only way fear can rule your life is if you let it, simple as that. I used to be afraid of everything, now I fear nothing because I took control of my life and chose to live instead. Now I see how petty and small fear really is, it is nothing. We all have the ability to do this, it's just a matter of planting your feet and facing it, if you can do this fear will back down. Two years ago I stayed hidden in my prison of a closet, now I live full time as a woman with total confidence in myself. I'm not saying that getting to that point was easy, but I did it and so can anyone.

Karen

[renee k]

Hi Deidra,

Well stated! My sentiments exactly!

Huggs, Renee

[Kimkandy]

Society isn't fixed, it changes. If you don't like it you can try and change it.

Society is to blame is a cop out. You get a lot of say in how you want to live your life.

If you want to go out from tomorrow dressed as a woman, no one will stop you. If you don't pass and people notice or take offence :tongueout that's their problem.

What if 50 % of guys started going out dressed as :devil: women... then it wouldn't be unusual... it would be accepted as something some guys do and no one would bat an :rolleyes: eyelid.

Kim

:dom: :kissing: :kissing:

[crusadergirl]

So far all my friends are cool with me being a crossdrssser, i was scared to go out and i didn't want anybody to know. Like many of you were saying don't worry about what other think of you, the only thing that matters is what you think of your self. They say theres no cure for crossdressing there don't need to be one. I'm going though a stage that i just don't have the urge to cd, its just not that important to me anymore i don't know why that is.

[Delila]

I have to say I dont think that there is even enough knowledge in general to know what a crossdresser is. It was a long time before I even knew what I am imagine all of the people that are out there that have no exposure to cding there are just too many people who dont know what is going on. Hopefully considering that we live in the age of information people will start to learn and accept things that they previously did not. Sadly only time will tell but ignorance is one of the major obstacles that every cder has to overcome. Its not always as easy as people lacking knowledge as people not wanting to hurt you for being different which I have encountered more than I would like to admit. Time will tell dont give up on society its not all bad... Just mostly.

[Eugenie]

Society doesn't have a clue about us. Until society is brought out of the darkness about cross dressing we will always be battered verbally, and looked at as freaks.

Thanks for your most enlightening post.

Let me jump in to inform the forum readers that a discussion on the possibility to organise an annual "International day for Trans*" people started on a French language forum. (Trans* = Transvestites, Transgender, Transsexuals and anyone identifting as Cross Dresser or gender challenged...)

Such a day might help providing a more accurate image of who we are in our diversity.

:hugs:
Eugenie

[tekla west]

You are only free to the extent that YOU are free. If you are dependant on someone else for that freedom, you might as well jump down, turn around and pick a bale of cotton.

As the great thinker - Hephzibah Menuhin - once said: Freedom means choosing your burden. That rules out anyone else choosing your burden for you.