Back in Time

[CaptLex]

If you could go back in time and speak to your younger self, what wisdom, advice or encouragement would you impart with yourself and at what age?

I would probably offer much encouragement that things will turn out alright in the end, and not to sweat the small stuff (and maybe some stock tips :heehee:). This question is open to all.

[Kimberley]

Brilliant Capn.

First. Marriage would have been out.
Second. Make my parents understand even as a child instead of taking the lumps and "conforming".
Third: Get good help from a counsellor as young as possible.
Fourth: Transition as young as possible.

The problem here is that that was a different time and place. The resources we have today didnt exist back then. Christine Jorgensen was a freak on the talk show circuit. Discrimination was very high towards her.

I guess this and a lot more forms my thoughts on support and advocacy for TG youth.

:hugs:
Kimberley :sad:

[Kate Simmons]

Captlex, You saw "Back To The Future" right? By buying that book in the future, Marty caused an alternate timeline to be created causing all kinds of grief until he and Doc fixed it. In spite of that, I would probably go back as Ericka and slap the bejesus out of young Richard telling him to never, ever wear a dress or try to look like a girl. I'd probably end up creating my own "time paradox" and because of what I did, young Rich was more determined than ever to crossdress, meaning if I hadn't gone back and done it, I probably wouldn't exist as who I am today! Confused? I know I am!:happy: Ericka/Rich

[Poltergeist]

I would tell myself to be tougher... I've been through a lot of really bad stuff in my life, and I can't blame my younger self for not being able to handle it all, but if I had been a better surviver then, I think things would have been a lot easier for me now.

[Lisa Golightly]

Never buy a Mercedes Benz.

[Kieron Andrew]

Never buy a Mercedes Benz.
never would anyway beemers are nicer

[Lisa Golightly]

never would anyway beemers are nicer

They work... That's for sure :)

[Adam]

there would be so many things i would change if only i could go back i n time :(

[CaptLex]

:happy:
there would be so many things i would change if only i could go back i n time :(
Like what? Tell us one, please.

[Amy Hepker]

Wow Capt. That's a tough one like ericka said I would be afraid of making it worse. But you know what, I would take that chance. I would let myself know that my father was going to die when I was 18 and to enjoy the short time I would have with him. I would also let myself know that the 2 wives that I have had were the wrong choices and that I should look in the right places to find my present Lady that I am with now. I would also give myself other insights to help me in the life ahead and how to invest in the right areas as to make life easier for myself. As far as Crossdressing I would let myself know that someday it would be alright and that there is someone out there that would help and want to be with me. I think that I would miss the pleasures of having my 2 kids that I wouldn't have if I didn't marry my 2nd wife, but that is the one who hurt the worst. Well, I guess I would tell myself never to be a semi driver (not home enough). Man, I just don't know, by this time my life would be so messed up, Oh man it's messed up now. Capt. this isn't a fair question. I just don't know.

[Kate Simmons]

When a butterfly flutters it's wings in one part of the Earth, it can eventually become a hurricane in another. There is the possibility of changing the past. If we did, however, we wouldn't know it. Who knows, maybe we've done this already and we are living the results now. Be careful what you wish for, my friends, it may (have already) come true.:happy: Richard

[Adam]

:happy:
Like what? Tell us one, please.

one would be id save my brother he was only 19 ffs

[Evert]

First of all I would recommend to myself that I shouldn't be afraid of the schoolcounselor. I think life would have been different if I had spoken with her when the FTM thoughts popped into my mind for the first time. I've waited 2 years with it.....

[Felix]

A good thread CaptLex! As for me well I always think I am weak so I guess I would wanna be stronger and yet from the weak times I have gained strength so maybe I wouldn't want to change that. I always said during my most sad times that if I could turn the clock back I would do things differently but then my life may not be as rich as it is today with all the experiences I have had, good and bad. As there is something to be gained from all of them. xx Felix :hugs:

[Kate Simmons]

Getting back to your original posting Captlex (time warps aside), I think I would do exactly what you said you would do. Encourage and re-assure myself that everything would turn out all right. The spooky part about this whole thing is that when I was a kid, some old guy came up to me and did just that. I never saw this guy again but remembered his words. You can imagine how I felt when I read your post. Like Yogi Berra used to say:"deja vu, all over again". Kind of creeped me out in the beginning but , well, since you all know me pretty well, I figured I'd share that. I'm still getting goose bumps while I'm writing this though. Ericka

[Victoria Anne]

okay Captlex, that is a good question but how should one decide for even the slightest change then could be major changes now,that said I must agree with you, evrything will be alright! good question

[Calliope]

No joke, when I was 11 or so, I just loved Yoko Ono. Her crazy records, her wacked-out look, nutty art and her bitchy attitude - the whole bit. I printed up a T-shirt with her name to wear at school, 7th grade. 'Woman Power' was my fave tune. I sent her a fan letter (1972) and she actually mailed me a copy of her book - autographed (along with what's-his-name) with 'love + peace.' That slayed me. Years later, I started rocking in a band - often buying blouses (ostensibly for the wild colors) to wear onstage. Psychedelic punk. A bit later (grunge), I got the notion to have my band perform a Yoko Ono tribute set, doing techno versions of her outrageous 1st album. I was the singer - er, screamer in this instance. I had superlong hair so I dyed it black. I was going for the 'Yoko look.' We got a gig in NYC at CBGB's.

My big regret in life is not taking the tribute all the way and wearing the characteristic pushup bra and black hot pants so I totally looked like Ms. Ono.

Boo hoo, it's really been a major shoulda for me.

[Sierra Evon]

I would go back to see myself when I first realized , I wanted to dress like a girl , and then tell myself to just be myself , and just show up to school as Sierra the girl.....and here is some shopping money,........

[JenniferMint]

Try to get on HRT pre-puberty.

Use my knowledge of the future economy to get rich easily (e.g. buy Microsoft stock).

[Abraxas]

I would have just told my younger self I was TG, and that there were others who I'd find later on. I don't really have regrets about this aspect of my life.

[Joy Carter]

I'd tell myself to stop being a pain in the a--. No, but I would at lest encourage myself to settle down and grow up. That things will get better and that I will be loved by someone worth wile. And to not get mad so easily:Angry3:. I think that was a major hold back to my success in life. I did well but I would have had want I wanted in life sooner.

[Taylor105]

Definitely I would tell myself that I did not need to conform to Christianity and my parents wishes for me to get married. My ex husband would not be as mentally messed up if he had never met me. :(

[Marcie Sexton]

Be yourself...Don't worry about others opinions...Take that big step to womanhood...

[ZenFrost]

I'd warn myself about the worst day of my life before it happened. I'd also tell myself to start transitioning pre-puberty so I could avoid becoming a woman altogether. I'd also tell myself to start worshipping Mandelbrot as early as possible, heh heh (okay, that was geeky). And I'd warn myself to NEVER interact with ANY of my mother's family because I HATE THEM ALL! (except for that one cousin and maybe her dad) and it would've been better if I'd never even bothered to try to get along with them (the things they've done are truly unforgivable).

[MJ]

that's a good question but would you listen to yourself ?,
i think the best wisdom i could in-part is listen to your heart and trust your gut
you know who and what you are. trust yourself do what you feel is right and let go your fear. fear will cause you more pain and heartache let it go

[kerrianna]

...but was too confused/hurt to do anything about it - open myself up to accept and give love. It's the one thing I wish I had been able to do sooner, but I was building those castle walls for a reason and it's not easy to open the gate.

So I think I would just go back and give myself a big hug :hugs: , even if my younger self tried to squirm away.

[pocoyo]

Lol erm well I didn't know how to answer this thread even though I thought about it a bit.
But I just found something I wrote in April 2005 after I'd just listened to a recording of me singing a sad song I'd written when I was about 15 or 16. It's really crap but seems relevant.




Boy


I heard his voice

It was young, tainted, strained with sadness
But also defiant, hopeful
With a little gladness

He spoke of confusion and grief
Fear and longing
A grovelling need for relief

He was worried, upset
Tortured and taunted

I saw his pale face
Drawn, dark shadows
Like an addict, haunted

Haunted by the feelings
The terror
The memories

I wanted to hold him in my arms and tell him not to be scared, not to worry
Give him a hug, help him relax..let go…
Tell him it’d all be ok

That I knew he’d be fine
One day

That I knew ‘cos I’d been there
And I am here now

But how could I tell him this?
How?

When I stumbled through Tuesday, wracked with confusion
Disorientation, disillusion

Staggering broken-hearted, faint yet lion hearted
Scared, furious
Through the bright, fuzzy landscape of drunken dreams
Where nothing seems
As it should
As it would
If I were normal

How could I throw that poor lad false hope
A life rope

But how could I not?

He was longing

Longing for someone to set him free
Did he find release?

He simply turned into me.

[kerrianna]

Hey, I really liked that. :hugs: :love:
Yeah, 15 or 16. What a wonderful age. :rolleyes:

Thanks for posting that Pocoyo - it's very moving. :hugs:

[happyfish]

That was really touching, pocoyo, and not crap at all. Better than anything I wrote when I was that age.
To answer the question, I don't think I'd say anything, or even go back and try to tell my younger person anything. Sure, I had bad times and did some really stupid things (who hasn't?), but that's made me who I am. Maybe who I am is confused and weird and whatever; it doesn't matter. I like who I am, and that took a while. I wouldn't want to mess that up by trying to 'make things better.'
Plus I was kind of a brat, and probably wouldn't have listened to anything I have to say.

[Abraxas]

That was really touching, pocoyo, and not crap at all. Better than anything I wrote when I was that age.
To answer the question, I don't think I'd say anything, or even go back and try to tell my younger person anything. Sure, I had bad times and did some really stupid things (who hasn't?), but that's made me who I am. Maybe who I am is confused and weird and whatever; it doesn't matter. I like who I am, and that took a while. I wouldn't want to mess that up by trying to 'make things better.'
Plus I was kind of a brat, and probably wouldn't have listened to anything I have to say.

I agree 100%
Especially the last bit. I was a horrible child. Wouldn't listen to anyone. Ugh.