how do you love your so ?

[MJ]

hi all
i was talking with a bunch of men at work they were talking about there s.o
however the thing that got me was they seem so ungrateful for there so like one topic was if my old lady wont put out the she can get out or she better make sure ====== you fill in the blanks .. well all i can say is i am glad i am not a member of that group .. you how ever seem so loving to wards your so is this due to your femme side do you think? is your love deeper stronger because of your femme side ..
to put it another way do you love like a woman would ... and i mean no offense BTW just asking ... hugs Marissa

[AyJay]

I think that any relationship based on sex is doomed to fail. Our relationship is based on mutual love, respect and trust. We are really good friends, and have been since we first met. I can't say if that is because of any special knowledge or leanings on my part, but I can say that it does take work, but the work is worth the effort. As I come to more embrace the feminine I do find it easier to see her point of view and be there for her, but sometimes I find that she wants a "real man", and that is something I find trouble providing. Unlike her, I tend to walk away from arguments, and have only ever been in one or two fights in my entire life.

[Billijo49504]

Hi, I know what you are talking about. I wonder why some guys ever got married. It the old bag this or that, is this reasonable.NO!!! Now my wives were different, the first was with me for just short of 13 yrs, then the cancer took her. My second has been with me for a bit over 22 yrs, and is my best friend and buddy. I'd rather spend time with her than anyone else.......BJ

[Joni Beauman]

MJ,
Sorry to say, but that sounds like a particularly crude bunch you work with. Its hard to justify coming to the defense of males in general, but your workplace experience doesn't seem to be the norm everywhere - at least - and I hate to sound naive here, but I have not heard anything like that in my 23 years of work in a state government/univeristy community. Perhaps researchers/biologists are just a bit ahead of their time! Joni

[Penny Lane]

Hi MJ

What an original question.

I suppose the answer would have to be yes, I do love like (I presume) a woman loves. As has been said, a relationship based purely on lust and one sided taking isn't going to get very far.

I too used to work with neanderthals who made similar comments of what they wanted, what they'd better get or woe betide the "Missus".

Being a CDer has to effect the way we think, behave and our emotions, they all come as a set, a set we're programmed with from birth. I too have never been in a fight, I'd much rather everyone got on together and I could (and still can) cry at the drop of a hat. Traits I shall never change.

And yes, fabulous photos.

Love

Penny x

[Sally24]

Yes, I think we're probably more in touch with our emotional side than most men. I do notice that most of the smart men in my generation are much more sensitive than older men. My best friends aren't afraid to cry or hug when the occasion calls for it.

You may find that in some groups, like your workplace, there is alot of posturing by the men to fit a certain expectation. Much like young guys, they try to fit in more than older men.

My wife and I are best friends first and I think that makes a big difference. We like to just sit and talk and to be with each other.

Sally

[Jaki Kaye]

I used to work in an office like that in Canada and was frequently accused of being gay by one or two of the lower intelligence rated individuals – but always found the women to be quite chatty with me which really infuriated the low life’s as they were “gods gift to women”.
My ex-wife even tried to use it as a lever in our divorce but her lawyer laughed at her.

Whilst my wife has requested that I come to bed as a man when ever possible she has also said that she loves the more tender and intimate loving we have now and that I am more thoughtful of her needs than before. She wins and I win.

Love,

Jaki xoxxo:hugs:

[tanya3]

i love my wife the way a man should , with love and respect . we have agreat relationship that only get's better with time . i work with guy's like that to i think they talk that way to show there men . our relationship is not based on sex , our house is so busy that we almost have to plan dates to see each other . i couldn't imagine my life without her .

Tanya

[Phyliss]

M J says, "one topic was if my old lady wont put out the she can get out or she better make sure ====== you fill in the blanks .."

Been there, heard that, too. 20 years in USN and you hear it all. Still hear it at some construction sites. I just keep my mouth shut and go on about my business. Don't spend much time talking with some of the "less than informed" people. At my age I'm not expected to be the "stud puppy" of the crowd. For the most part, I'm looked at as the "old goat" of the group. Other guys my age have about the same feelings towards ther younger ones, "let em talk, we know better."

Has for how I love my wife...... with all of my heart and soul.

[MJ]

M J says, "one topic was if my old lady wont put out the she can get out or she better make sure ====== you fill in the blanks .."

Been there, heard that, too. 20 years in USN and you hear it all. Still hear it at some construction sites. I just keep my mouth shut and go on about my business. Don't spend much time talking with some of the "less than informed" people. At my age I'm not expected to be the "stud puppy" of the crowd. For the most part, I'm looked at as the "old goat" of the group. Other guys my age have about the same feelings towards ther younger ones, "let em talk, we know better."

Has for how I love my wife...... with all of my heart and soul.

yes but it botherd me all day. because i am full time. and there are other woman work there . these lower intelligence rated individuals hit a nerve becaues i would never treat a woman like that..
and if reg guys are like that then i feel sorry for there s.o

[janelle]

MJ, i would have to say since i admitted & accepted my fem side my wife gets alot more attension, help with housework, & all the things that she really loves todo. I do see myself alot different as when i was young in my marriage i could have said something like hows your old lady, but i know now how harmful that & stupid comments like that can be. I try to treat her like a queen & hope someday she will do the same for me.
:love: Janelle

[ubokvt]

As my sister loves to point out on some level all men are pigs!!!!!:devil: If you have come out to your SO and the relationship continues to grow and be supportive, its not because of the feminine side, although that is a nice benifit, it is becuase of the trust and mutual respect that has always been there, the trust that gave you the safety to let the feminine out. I trust my SO, I am truly safe with her, and with her support anything is possible, given that how could I not lover her deeper than I ever had, its safe to let go and do it.:love:

[Amy Hepker]

I know what you mean about guys talking about there SOs that way. I used to work around a lot of guys and it seems a lot of them always had something bad to say about there SOS. I myself have always respected my SOs. There was alot of girls (ladies) that I loved that I truely believe they don't know what LOVE is. When the going gets tough they leave. I feel a lot of GGs don't know what the meaning of LOVE is. Now don't get me wrong because there are alot of GGs out there that can and do LOVE. LOVE to me is something that is so special and a marriage is till death due you depart. I really LOVE the GLady I am with now and wish I would have met her many years before I did. I do not talk bad of her and never would. I do believe we are soul mates and made for each other. LOVE is different to a lot of people and is just sex to some and just a good time to others. A lasting Relationship is made of Trust, Understanding, and True LOVE!

[kerrianna]

Firstly I do believe that because most or all of us on this site embrace our feminine side and explore different viewpoints we do tend to be more kind-hearted and generous and GRATEFUL to our SO's and other women in our lives. And we probably get the 'friend' part a little easier. :hugs:

Having said that I know that when a group of men get togther, esp in a macho environment (esp if there are one or two loudmouths who really egg people on - my guess is these are the guys HIDING the most in their personal lives) then guys get stupid, say stupid crass things trying to not only impress each other, but mainly NOT SHOWING WEAKNESS. This starts when you're a kid I found. That's why I always wanted to play with girls. They could be cruel in their own way, but at least you didn't have to posture and pretend you were tough (read: NUMB) :(

I've found get some of these guys by themselves and they can actually be ok, sometimes they are totally the opposite of what they're posturing. They're just too insecure to show vulnerability around the others and want to be liked. Certainly don't want to be the 'target'.

And anyone who REALLY feels that way about their SO's I just pity. :loser:

[Kristi1948]

I too work in an all male environment (machine shop) and it seems that each one has to try to outdo the other in their comments and their silly macho ways.
My exfather-in-law was probably the worst of the lot , although he and I have been good friends since '76. When he would be at home he would yell for his SO Peggy make me some coffee, make me something to eat etc. Now this guy was perfectly capable of doing all these things himself, which his daughter and I more than once told him. When he would be with his male friends it was mostly talk of "conquests". He and I were at his house drinking some coffee when this type of talk came up and he made the comment to me that he never heard me join in these conversations. I made one comment to him......(Would you like for me to talk about Tammy as a "conquest)" That ended that conversation once and for all.
One day I was out enfemme with my wife and she made the comment "my god you are such a girl" as I started to apologize she stopped me and said I would much rather have you like this than like "daddy".

[Nigella]

how do you love your so ? was the opening question and for me there is only one answer...



...WITH ALL MY HEART (and yes I know capitals means shouting in forums etc, but I want to shout it from the rooftops.)

831 forever Sandra :love: :kiss: :kissing:

[Sandra]

how do you love your so ? was the opening question and for me there is only one answer...



...WITH ALL MY HEART (and yes I know capitals means shouting in forums etc, but I want to shout it from the rooftops.)

831 forever Sandra :love: :kiss: :kissing:


Awww sweetheart I love you too.

:love: :hugs:

[Nigella]

how do you love your so ? was the opening question and for me there is only one answer...



...WITH ALL MY HEART (and yes I know capitals means shouting in forums etc, but I want to shout it from the rooftops.)

831 forever Sandra :love: :kiss: :kissing:

Awww sweetheart I love you too.

:love: :hugs:

Having seen your new avatar can I recind my last statement :hiding:

[DAVIDA]

that is how I love Jean. she is my heart,my soul,my confidant,my lover,my reason for being a better person,and my best friend. There is no one else that I would rather spend my time with!

[Lovely Rita]

MJ
I have my theories but unlike the macho guys who some times seem to look down on the femme side of life. I have always admired and respected all things womanly. Woman have been my heroes in so many ways. Not all of them but many of the rough guys can over compensate with regard to hiding their feminine side.

I embrace all things on the femme side and really do appreciate my SO. I really loved my mom too. I think it has made me sensitive and considerate to my SO.

Just a few thoughts on it.

My heroes wear Nylons

Oh yea and I love her with all my heart!

[Melora]

This sounds kinda weird, but, I think that if it was not for my Fem Side, I would most likely be in Jail.. This side of me just kinda guides my "Male Mode", away from the Alternate "bad Situation", If you know what I mean, EVEN IN my Male Form.. It is kinda like a "Smart Self" = What would a proper Lady do and NOT JUST A GENTLEMAN, As a Guy would most likely do = "what benifits HIM the Best"?, I am sure. So I try to be kind of Feminine in Most thinking Situations, IE = Taking the Peacefull way out = ETC.. Letting the "More Lady Like influence than my Male side out" = Do I do Just Vengance or Mercy if great harm has been done to me!..??? Maybe I should Just have Karma do what IT WILL.....
Just some RAMBLINGSS, HeHe..
Melora!

[Melora]

Wow what a Great thread indeed! Thank You ALL!

[Joni Beauman]

how do you love your so ? was the opening question and for me there is only one answer...



...WITH ALL MY HEART (and yes I know capitals means shouting in forums etc, but I want to shout it from the rooftops.)

831 forever Sandra :love: :kiss: :kissing:

Sometimes its hard to tell when there is a rush and it seems logical to chip away at an issue from the edges, leaving the core for more insightful souls. I am a gentle person, perhaps because I wish I were a woman. This surely affects my relationship with my SO, but would so in a more emotionally rewarding way if this transness was a shared experience. There are barriers and they seem to be a limiting factor. Joni

[TeriAnn]

I believe that my crossdressing has helped me to understand wherethe GG's are coming from.I have seen from there point of veiw about the time it takes to put on make-up, pick out the clothes you want to wear and then frilly things to go with it, and the fact that high heels do hurt your feet after awhile. The pain you have is worth it and I for one am willing to put up with it. It helps me to understand what it all about and why I love doing what I do.:D :happy:

[tekla west]

You need to find men who have GROWN UP. That's all.