rachel_in_mi
11-28-2006, 10:30 PM
Hello All,
I have been lurking for a long time and have finally made a few posts. Now I finally have the nerve to share my story with you. I love this place and really feel comfortable here. I have learned alot and feel that it is time to "bear my soul" so to speak. I have had these feelings since I was young and of course did all the usual stuff like "borrow" panties and try on clothes of anyone that I could get access to. I separated from my wife a few years back and really began to explore my "feminine" side. I did all of the usual things....went nuts, ordered tons of things online, PURGED (oh my GOD the things I used to own :sad: ) and explored my bi-side. Through all of this I have grown and then regressed again. Eventually I got divorced (dont feel bad as we now have a much better relationship and get along much better than we ever did married which is great for our kids). I have had relationships and with each one I surpress my feminine side as it progresses only to return with avengence. Each time it comes back stronger and better. The best thing is that each time it returns I am smarter and stronger and know what to do and where to shop. I have learned the lessons of buying cheap and now shop well. This time I am going slow and really spending time on beauty.....skin care, proper makeup and buying things in a rational manner. I love women very much but definitely have a bi-side and feel a strong attraction to the "right man". I am not sure if I will ever find a girl who not only understands but who will also support me but at this point I can survive either way. I wish I could find a girl that I could be completely open with as I am COMPLETELY IN THE CLOSET. My life now is not one that I can be open with and I have many secrets but someday I hope to be open with at least someone. I would like to meet another CD who I can share things with however it will still be hidden as my life is on a path that I cannot change. I really appreciate everyone here and love the posts. I hope this makes sense to you.
take care :hugs:
rachel
I have been lurking for a long time and have finally made a few posts. Now I finally have the nerve to share my story with you. I love this place and really feel comfortable here. I have learned alot and feel that it is time to "bear my soul" so to speak. I have had these feelings since I was young and of course did all the usual stuff like "borrow" panties and try on clothes of anyone that I could get access to. I separated from my wife a few years back and really began to explore my "feminine" side. I did all of the usual things....went nuts, ordered tons of things online, PURGED (oh my GOD the things I used to own :sad: ) and explored my bi-side. Through all of this I have grown and then regressed again. Eventually I got divorced (dont feel bad as we now have a much better relationship and get along much better than we ever did married which is great for our kids). I have had relationships and with each one I surpress my feminine side as it progresses only to return with avengence. Each time it comes back stronger and better. The best thing is that each time it returns I am smarter and stronger and know what to do and where to shop. I have learned the lessons of buying cheap and now shop well. This time I am going slow and really spending time on beauty.....skin care, proper makeup and buying things in a rational manner. I love women very much but definitely have a bi-side and feel a strong attraction to the "right man". I am not sure if I will ever find a girl who not only understands but who will also support me but at this point I can survive either way. I wish I could find a girl that I could be completely open with as I am COMPLETELY IN THE CLOSET. My life now is not one that I can be open with and I have many secrets but someday I hope to be open with at least someone. I would like to meet another CD who I can share things with however it will still be hidden as my life is on a path that I cannot change. I really appreciate everyone here and love the posts. I hope this makes sense to you.
take care :hugs:
rachel