Phyliss
12-09-2006, 06:05 AM
Whoops, took that last corner a bit fast.
Hang in there with me while I set up the "happening"
As many of you know I've "come out" to my wife of 35+ years, recently. Quite frankly I'm a bit surprised by her reaction to all of this. While not being 100% supportive, (read: not quite ready to go shopping with me dressed or do the "club" thing) but she does allow me to be dressed at home in front of her and hasn't "gone over the edge" when she happens to se me in a bra and panties, while getting dressed or undressed for bed, and I can wear nice night gowns to bed with her.
I've gotten to a point of having an amout of freedom in most things. Not able to sit down at the supper table while fully dressed, due to having our 13 yr old grandson living with us.
So,.... with Christmas around the corner, the question arises, "what do you want for Christmas"? Now, after being married so long and having acquired almost everything we could want over the years there is very little we really need. I finally got out of her that she'd like to complete her Hummel collection of the Manger Scene. (She already has Mary, Joseph, and The Infant, along with two of the shephards) I got her the Three Kings and their camels. (not cheap$$$$). So then I get The Question put to me. Now, I've been eyeing a nice battery powered impact driver by Makita. So I mentioned this and was told that as long as I pick out the one I want she'll pay for it, but I can't have it until Christmas. O.K. fine I can live with that.
Now we all know that we're the sort of people who will "push the envelope" as far as we can. I mentioned that she was getting the better end of the deal by my spending more on her than she was on me. I mentioned that I wanted a robe like hers, that I had gotten her last Christmas.
http://www.barefootdreams.com/home.html
She has the "camel" color. These thing are soooooo decadent soft. Reluctantly she agreed, (mostly because she's financially cheap) not for any CD reason. Again I was told I had to get it myself. Mostly because she didn't know where the store was that I had purchased it from last year. (I'm NOT about to show her either, that's MY lingerie shop, not hers.)
So, I stopped in there on Thurs. to get one, and picked out a pretty, light colored lilac one. When i showed her what I got she didn't say too much. After about 15 minutes I got blasted with, "How dare you, You can't open that on Christmas Day. We gonna have company, how will that look? THAT thing screams GIRL." and then a flood of tears.
There's only one thing to do at this time. Tuck your tail and give out lots of gentle hugs and kisses to reassure her. Which is what I did. The next thing is to admit that you made a mistake and do what you can to correct the problem. Don't let a small thing like a color choice ruin everything. Friday morning I talked with her about my error and promised to exchange it for a better color choice. Took it back and got the Seaglass color, which is a sort of light green. (Kinda glad I didn't get the pink one I really wanted) That color choice is O.K. with her.
The lesson here is: If your S.O. is on the same "ride of your life" with you, and is more of a passenger than anything else drive carefully.
By this I mean, my wife is still new to all of this and isn't quite sure of how far I'm gonna go with my Cding. (I'm not either). I don't want to scare her into thinking I've gone over to "The Girl Side". (I'd liike to, but that's another thread) Friday I appologized for being so unthinking and uncaring of her feelings about all of this and re-stated my desire to not upset her in anything I do when it comes to crossdressing.
So, as the opening title suggests, I took that last corner a bit fast, and scared her a might. Told her I was sorry and meant it.
The analogy of "the ride of my life" comes from my therapist. She said to me this past week when I saw her, that I'm in control of what's happening in our life, regarding my CDing, and wife is simply along for the ride as a passenger. That made sense to me. As long as I don't go too fast or to wild about it all I can make progress. Although I want IT all now, I just have to go slowly and carefully and let her become accustomed to each step.
Hang in there with me while I set up the "happening"
As many of you know I've "come out" to my wife of 35+ years, recently. Quite frankly I'm a bit surprised by her reaction to all of this. While not being 100% supportive, (read: not quite ready to go shopping with me dressed or do the "club" thing) but she does allow me to be dressed at home in front of her and hasn't "gone over the edge" when she happens to se me in a bra and panties, while getting dressed or undressed for bed, and I can wear nice night gowns to bed with her.
I've gotten to a point of having an amout of freedom in most things. Not able to sit down at the supper table while fully dressed, due to having our 13 yr old grandson living with us.
So,.... with Christmas around the corner, the question arises, "what do you want for Christmas"? Now, after being married so long and having acquired almost everything we could want over the years there is very little we really need. I finally got out of her that she'd like to complete her Hummel collection of the Manger Scene. (She already has Mary, Joseph, and The Infant, along with two of the shephards) I got her the Three Kings and their camels. (not cheap$$$$). So then I get The Question put to me. Now, I've been eyeing a nice battery powered impact driver by Makita. So I mentioned this and was told that as long as I pick out the one I want she'll pay for it, but I can't have it until Christmas. O.K. fine I can live with that.
Now we all know that we're the sort of people who will "push the envelope" as far as we can. I mentioned that she was getting the better end of the deal by my spending more on her than she was on me. I mentioned that I wanted a robe like hers, that I had gotten her last Christmas.
http://www.barefootdreams.com/home.html
She has the "camel" color. These thing are soooooo decadent soft. Reluctantly she agreed, (mostly because she's financially cheap) not for any CD reason. Again I was told I had to get it myself. Mostly because she didn't know where the store was that I had purchased it from last year. (I'm NOT about to show her either, that's MY lingerie shop, not hers.)
So, I stopped in there on Thurs. to get one, and picked out a pretty, light colored lilac one. When i showed her what I got she didn't say too much. After about 15 minutes I got blasted with, "How dare you, You can't open that on Christmas Day. We gonna have company, how will that look? THAT thing screams GIRL." and then a flood of tears.
There's only one thing to do at this time. Tuck your tail and give out lots of gentle hugs and kisses to reassure her. Which is what I did. The next thing is to admit that you made a mistake and do what you can to correct the problem. Don't let a small thing like a color choice ruin everything. Friday morning I talked with her about my error and promised to exchange it for a better color choice. Took it back and got the Seaglass color, which is a sort of light green. (Kinda glad I didn't get the pink one I really wanted) That color choice is O.K. with her.
The lesson here is: If your S.O. is on the same "ride of your life" with you, and is more of a passenger than anything else drive carefully.
By this I mean, my wife is still new to all of this and isn't quite sure of how far I'm gonna go with my Cding. (I'm not either). I don't want to scare her into thinking I've gone over to "The Girl Side". (I'd liike to, but that's another thread) Friday I appologized for being so unthinking and uncaring of her feelings about all of this and re-stated my desire to not upset her in anything I do when it comes to crossdressing.
So, as the opening title suggests, I took that last corner a bit fast, and scared her a might. Told her I was sorry and meant it.
The analogy of "the ride of my life" comes from my therapist. She said to me this past week when I saw her, that I'm in control of what's happening in our life, regarding my CDing, and wife is simply along for the ride as a passenger. That made sense to me. As long as I don't go too fast or to wild about it all I can make progress. Although I want IT all now, I just have to go slowly and carefully and let her become accustomed to each step.