find myself wanting men

[xdmandy]

hi everyone i started xdressing around 6months ago and love doing it but in the last few months while dressed as a girl im finding myself wanting a man if you get my drift but never even thought of it before i started xdressing.has anyone else felt this way or has the xdressing just brought out my long hidden bi/gay side as every time i put on my stockings,skirt and make up the feeling gets stronger but cant give up the xdressing as i like doing it to much.

[Delila]

In my experience I have found that when I am dressed I feel so feminine that I want men. I have gone that route and I have to say dont do anything that you will regret. After being with men I catch myself trying to get my wife to do things she does not agree with. If you can avoid being with a real man I caution against it due to the fact that you will likely want it more and that can ruin a relationship.

[trannynikki]

Hi Mandy,

I understand your question very well.

When I'm in male attire I ogle everything that walks by!! I sometimes look at the way girls dress, walk carry their bag etc and pick up some tips.
I also wonder whether their clothes would look good on me.
I never , however, look at men with any interest at all.
When Nikki comes out things are a little different-it's like I'm 2 different people..
I always seem to end up deflowered when out with my tranny escort and I think it's fab-I can't wait till the next time!
If you're a little spooked by how you feel, then you could go for the best half way house ever and play with another tv/ts.
In my experience most of them start to look gorj after a few bacardis...
What have you got to lose?? Hope you enjoy.

[MonicaBella]

I'm a cross dresser about 20yrs. I never like to go with a mans. but i tried in the past. The the i like is to play with my toys and fantasying i' m a lesbian. So don't worry about. if you thing you like mans just try.

[Kate Simmons]

Sometimes it's hard not to feel that way when you are into the "role". You have to get hold of reason however. Ask yourself what you want out of such a thing. What kind of guy are you contemplating being with? Is it just a cheap thrill or are you looking for a relationship? Most guys, even the ones who are "admirers" or "tranny chasers" are just after one thing. Typical guys, you know. We've all been there being guys ourselves. When you become a "woman" however, things seem to change, at least for me they do. I tend to view it as finding someone who is really interested in me and not just what they can get out of me. It's nice to be myself but I have to ask myself what I am really looking for. I see no point in making an "investment" in something that will come to a dead end. If you just want the attention that's fine but if you can't find someone who relates to you as a person, it's becomes a "dead end". Like anything else, it's good to weigh things in the balance, otherwise you may end up getting hurt emotionally as well as physically.:happy: Ericka Kay

[sindey]

Ur not alone, i quite often have that feelin and i just treat it as a fantasy. I have been with a man before and it was alright, it was nothing compared to being with a woman though.
The only advice i can give you is too keep it as a fantasy, its a lot more better and lasts alot longer!!

Take it easy sweets!

[Naomi]

I understand where your coming from and i think its a natural reaction for some when feeling femme.
I myself have fantasies regarding men, but they are more of a flirtatious manner then sexual if you get my drift.
I consider myself to be straight although in honesty there is a bi-cuious side to me but im enjoying exploring my c/ding for now and im happy doing so.
be warned though most male admirers of cders/TV's are only after one thing and im sure you can guess what that is.
Take care

[Marcie Sexton]

In all honesty, although I can't speake for all of us, but I'm quite sure the thought has entered our mind, or it has for me...I think it is a natural thought especially being dressed as we do. Personally speaking, I've often wondered what it would be like to be a gg and be with a man, HOWEVER, with that said, I have never went down that road.

I am quite happy with what I have right here...My wife is quite a woman and deserves all my love and faithfulness...I think I'll remain hers in heart, mind, body, ans soul...

[occdresser]

I am not gay I am married,I think that some of these girls on here are very sexy and I would consider being with a cd but not a guy:D

[Kristen Marie]

I know I've had that fantasy, but only when I'm Kristen. I like to keep it as a fantasy....it's so much safer right now in my life.

[susiegrl19]

Mandy, I feel the same way as you do,but also have never acted on it. My thoughts get very confusing at times.

[Emily Ann Brown]

Many sisters seem to have had a thought or two like yours. For myself, I realized that I was just growing up as a female. I call it the 14 year old girl phase. We need romance (which is a part of gender, not sex), to feel accepted and beautiful, and touch (when training to minister to senior adults you are often instructed to touch them because it is a necessary need in life). Thing to remember is none of those things require a MAN necessarily. An accepting spouse can do very nicely (anybody got one I can borrow? giggle giggle). I find I seem to have grown beyond those urges now that I have a bit of a life as Emily Ann.

Emily Ann

[Kahlan51]

Hi : I had those feelings for a while when I was going through my "maybe I'm gay" so I had some "safe" experiences checking this out. where I arrived at was a lack of appeal totally to men as being physically attractive to me. But woman I love especially when they are dressed fem my heart aches with joy.
I love to be with other cd's dressed up there is a sexual charge there but it is for the woman they are rather than the masculine aspect. Be very cautious checking this out. It is easy to confuse fantasy and reality when you are already in the fantasy of gender gymnastics. Kahlan

[MsJanessa]

You may well be bi or gay---which is perfectly ok----don't let ANYBODY on this site or anyplace else tell you differently(in fact if you are attracted to tall blonde T-Girls, send Me a private message)---the problem is when you have an SO. That is a very sticky moral and ethical wicket---if you don't tell her, then not only are you "cheating" on her but also exposing her to a variety of social diseases etc, some of which are extremely serious, even fatal--you really don't have a right to do that. If you do tell her, then chances are one of two things will happen. The first is that she will leave, many if not most women are not interested in sharing their guy with another man. On the other hand she may be one of those relativly rare individuals who is ok with an open relationship. If that is the case be aware that it works both ways and that she will probably develop other relationships on her own, just as you have. If, on the other hand, you have no SO and are attracted to guys when dressed, by all means go ahead and enjoy yourself---just remember to practice SAFE (ER) sex. xoxo ps---I forget to add that in My own experience I prefer feminine types for sexual partners---either GGs or T-Girls--the only reason why I ever "dated" guys was to validate Myself as a T-Girl(ie I was able to attract and hold a mans interest---giving Me a sense of power over them) It may well be that the same thing is why you are finding yourself attracted to them when dressed---that they validate your sense of being female.

[cathie]

I've been with both and prefer woman. I love my wife immensely and would never consider anything else at this stage but it's very healthy to fantasize and "flirt". Just as long as the emotions are held in check when married or in a committed relationship.
Bi is a very real emotion. Some are and some are not. Just like being gay, some are and some are not. I happen to like sex very much. Whether it's with myself, my wife or another person. Sex makes us feel complete and damn good. Don't be ashamed of what makes you feel good just be careful with whom makes you feel good. Exploration can be fun too but be safe.

[MarinaTwelve200]

I think that there may be a repressed gay/bi element in some people that comes out when they CD. I , personally have never been attracted to men, and that knowledge comforted me in my early CD years when I feared I might be "gay" or somthing simply because I CD.

But I have also noticed, in my own CD and CD fantasies, a kind of sado/masochist streak (eg. forced fem/sexual "degradition") that has a turn on factor to consider. SOME of this wanting to be "with a man" or "taken by a man" might be a masochistic fantasy, which may be horrific in RL, but a safe S/M turn on in fantasy.

The above is somrthing to think about as I really do not beleive a Purely Hetro guy can suddenly become "gay" or "Bi" unless he was like that in the first place. It may be repressed or denyed. But it also may be a S/M "degradion" fantasy as above or something else(a cumpusion for perfectionisim in the female role) that might drive some of us to a relationship with a guy.

Dont accept or dismiss any of this off hand, as our own mind and mentality may fool us--the key is to OBSERVE your actions in certian situations and remember similar times, and draw your conclusions from what your ACTS tell you . not what your mind tells itself.

[marie354]

My little brother is gay and I've spoken to him about it. He really likes men so much that he whistles at them walking down the street. As for me, I experimented with it years earlier and learned it wasn't for me. I love my GGSO and would never think of relations with men at all any more. Just my own thoughts. Make of it what you will.

[Alice Torn]

I can relate. I have never had sex with a person, of any sex, except, in thought. When I am dressed up gorgeous, I look like the doll, I would like to have (gg). I usually fantasize about being laid, in my dresses, by a guy. But, I am only attracted to women. Lucille

[MsJanessa]

I can relate. I have never had sex with a person, of any sex, except, in thought. When I am dressed up gorgeous, I look like the doll, I would like to have (gg). I usually fantasize about being laid, in my dresses, by a guy. But, I am only attracted to women. Lucille

You have never had sex with another person?? Any body at all?

[Alice Torn]

And, I have known a number of older men, and, a few women, who are still physical virgins. My sister, is 59, single, proud of her virginity. Now, that doesn' mean never lusting, fantasizing, acting out solo! Lucille


now

[Jennaie]

I understand your fem desires, however, I think if you really think about it, your not attracted to men visually are you? So, what is it that your really wanting? Your really wanting exactly what a female wants, to be romanced, seduced and taken.

Would you not prefer that your GF or SO play the dominate role on occasion and perhaps be willing to wear a strap-on and seduce you in the same way that you seduce her?

I have fem desires as much as the next guy. Yes, I think all men have these desires regardless of whether or not they are crossdressers.

Personally, I would much prefer to be (taken) by a woman with a strap-on than a man anyday.

Finding a woman who is willing to roleplay this is another story.

The next time she says F---k you. Just look at her and smile saying, Don't tease me. And when she says, let's have sex, say ok, but can I be the girl this time.

You don't want a man, you want your woman to understand your fem side.

I usually don't respond to threads like these that are posted in open forums. but I think that the GG's here have a right to understand our fem desires and I think that they deserve at least a chance to please their SO without worry that he will go elsewhere to find fullfillment.

[Bethanygirl]

I understand your fem desires, however, I think if you really think about it, your not attracted to men visually are you? So, what is it that your really wanting? Your really wanting exactly what a female wants, to be romanced, seduced and taken.

Would you not prefer that your GF or SO play the dominate role on occasion and perhaps be willing to wear a strap-on and seduce you in the same way that you seduce her?

I have fem desires as much as the next guy. Yes, I think all men have these desires regardless of whether or not they are crossdressers.

Personally, I would much prefer to be (taken) by a woman with a strap-on than a man anyday.

Finding a woman who is willing to roleplay this is another story.

The next time she says F---k you. Just look at her and smile saying, Don't tease me. And when she says, let's have sex, say ok, but can I be the girl this time.

You don't want a man, you want your woman to understand your fem side.

I usually don't respond to threads like these that are posted in open forums. but I think that the GG's here have a right to understand our fem desires and I think that they deserve at least a chance to please their SO without worry that he will go elsewhere to find fullfillment.

I have to agree with Jennaie, having a woman take you is better than a man, men do not care about anything but the themselves during the act, but a woman will, even if she is enjoying herself greatly, think about your needs and pleasure. As an added plus, they have all the neccessary staying power!:blushing: :thumbsup:

[KelleyTGirl]

[QUOTE=trannynikki;665111]Hi Mandy,


I never , however, look at men with any interest at all.
When Nikki comes out things are a little different-it's like I'm 2 different people..

Same for me. When Kelley is in control, I drool over guys.

[carla smith]

I have no sexual desire for men. With that said, I am always searching for new experiences and if the right situation came along, I think I would consider it. But everything would have to be perfect to bed this one! In the two years that I have been cding and the past year and a half that I have been out and about I have not met one "guy" that even came close! I should include MtF cders and transexuals. I'm just learning how to be feminine, give me a break! I will move to the next level someday!

Have fun out there!

[JulieMichelle]

the only reason why I ever "dated" guys was to validate Myself as a T-Girl... It may well be that the same thing is why you are finding yourself attracted to them when dressed---that they validate your sense of being female.

I think this best describes the way that I feel about guys. As a guy, I am attracted entirely to GG's (though I would consider experimenting with a really feminine tgirl). But as Julie, I often fantasize about being with GG's, tgirls, and guys. I think it will be left at that - a fantasy - but I'm pretty sure the only reason I imagine it is as a means to validate my femininity.

For instance, if I'm walking down the street in girl mode, and a guy whistles at me, I'm tickled pink. ;) If I was in boy mode, I'd probably be flattered but not quite as excited by it.

*hugs!*
Julie

[michelleceedee]

I have been bi forever as well as a CD. I also love GG's so I have lots to chose from. Now is where it gets strange. When dressed I avoid guys like the plague! I much prefer the company of GG's and other CDS/TVS. Simply stated I think guys who want to be with me in drag are users, selfish and uncaring of my needs as a femme person. Meanwhile other CDS/TVS and women are curious, understanding, more caring and very accepting. The overall experience has value and I leave it with my self respect in tact. Go with a guy and you end up a ****! Used, and pushed aside. Some CDS enjoy that but most don't. Just my take from both sides of the aisle.

[Tatiana Thomas]

I understand your fem desires, however, I think if you really think about it, your not attracted to men visually are you? So, what is it that your really wanting? Your really wanting exactly what a female wants, to be romanced, seduced and taken.

Would you not prefer that your GF or SO play the dominate role on occasion and perhaps be willing to wear a strap-on and seduce you in the same way that you seduce her?

I have fem desires as much as the next guy. Yes, I think all men have these desires regardless of whether or not they are crossdressers.

Personally, I would much prefer to be (taken) by a woman with a strap-on than a man anyday.

Finding a woman who is willing to roleplay this is another story.

The next time she says F---k you. Just look at her and smile saying, Don't tease me. And when she says, let's have sex, say ok, but can I be the girl this time.

You don't want a man, you want your woman to understand your fem side.

I usually don't respond to threads like these that are posted in open forums. but I think that the GG's here have a right to understand our fem desires and I think that they deserve at least a chance to please their SO without worry that he will go elsewhere to find fullfillment.

Wow, that describes me to a T.
Although I wouldnt pass on a full time super fem TS either. I just think the womanly shape and look is so beautiful

[bebe nylons]

Like you l found l was very attracted to men when xcrossed. Since l am a single mature CD and often enfemme. l went with my attraction and have met a couple of older gay men and am totally taken with the experience to the point l have gone out in public enfemme. l am also enjoying the sex. So go for it. Hugs bebe

[mona lisa]

As I noted in another posting (http://www.crossdressers.com/forums/showthread.php?p=648307#post648307), when I am dressed up, I like the idea of a man but I have no attraction to men. It is an odd situation I am sure but it is what it is. Though I have thought when dressed about being with a woman in the role of a man if you know what I mean.

[Faye Emmette]

If you can separate Emotions from Sex then you might as well let life follow it's course.
I'm a 'never did/never wanted to' hetero but I had my first friend, like us, a few years ago and it was emotional and all. Well it ended and I'm nowhere near the stable, secure person I was.
Take care.
:hugs:
F.

[Edwina]

D**n! Now you have started up that itch again. :eek:
I am not attracted to men as a rule but there is always an exception, isn't there?
This exception, I suspect, suspects that I am CD and if he made a move I would probably respond in kind. :o
Who am I kidding? I would jump on him. :devil:
But that is not likely to happen. :sad:
Love
Edwina

[Josie06]

Like Carla, I have no sexual desire for me. That said ... when I'm dressed in nylons, heels a wonderful dress or skirt end blouse, make-up and accessories my desire, my fantasy, is to be with a man. I guess cause I fell gorgeous :gorgeous: and a woman. Really right at home.

It's wonderful to be dressed and with the girls but something about a man, a good man, and a committed relationship. As a woman that is where I would hope to be. Not with one of so many men today who seem to be in it only for the quick thrill and for themselves.

Although I will say until I can finally transition I would not be inclined to act on that fantasy. After that well ....

All my life I have been a woman trapped in a man's body (cliche I know) but true. I have had vivid dreams all my life, even now, and in most all of them I am a woman with a man, working and going though life's daily trials and pleasures. :blushing: I'm almost always the same man, over all these years when it comes to romance, but I've never seen his face. :hmmm:

I guess being of two minds and emotions, well at some point one must rule. Dressed to the '9's' Josie rules. But in the back that little voice always knows what it far enough. I'm at peace with myself having two minds cause my feminine side is most dominant and makes the male side much better. :be:

[Diana West]

Not knowing your martial status, I'd say you may just be exploring your sexuality or femininity. You may actually be coming to terms with your sexuality. Or you may perceive that in order to be complete feminine you need a man.
I have known some women who firmly believe that they need a man to be a woman. Having a man is part of their identity/self-perception. You may be experiencing the same thing.
You're still new to this so explore, honey, explore. That's the only way you'll find the answers.
As for me, I find when I'm en femme, it's the company of other women that I desire. Being feminine is more about being social than being sexual for me.

[Madeleine]

Had an affair some years ago with a bi-girl, and when I cross dressed it really turned her on and the bedroom was blazing hot!

Wish I could turn back the years....

Hugs Madeleine

[ArleneRaquel]

When I am enfemme I want another man, especially if they are also enfemme. Not enfemme only woman. Maureen

[JulieCDorlando]

Could be just a fantasy you are having. Nothing wrong with fantasies. Do not pay attention to labels that society places on people. Often enough those labels are illfitting any ways. You'll determine if and when you'll actually want to enact on your fantasies.

[Sara Kat]

I know exactly how you feel because I went through it too. But the feeling never went away and eventually I found a guy that made me feel comfortable enough and we...*ahem*...did the deed. I loved it and I'd do it again in a minute.

[tvbeckytv]

i dont think you can talk of physical attraction and sexual attraction as being the same thing.
straight woman can see other woman as being more attractive than men, but are still sexually attracted to men.
your sexual attraction is what determins your sexuality.
women tend to find attractions in more none physical charactoristics too, such as wit or intelligence.

[Angela E.]

As I noted in another posting (http://www.crossdressers.com/forums/showthread.php?p=648307#post648307), when I am dressed up, I like the idea of a man but I have no attraction to men. It is an odd situation I am sure but it is what it is. Though I have thought when dressed about being with a woman in the role of a man if you know what I mean.

It doesn`t seem odd to me.-Angela.:yrtw: :GE: :daydreaming: :daydreaming: :daydreaming:

[mona lisa]

It doesn`t seem odd to me.-Angela.:yrtw: :GE: :daydreaming: :daydreaming: :daydreaming:

I guess I am not used to trying to put this into words yet.

[SusanTL]

Hi.

Everyone is different. We all have our likes and dislikes. As for myself, it took a while but once I met the right man. I was hooked. At one time I was not sure which way I was going to go. Some of the men I have been with early on. Only cared about themselves, not thought about me at all. I was nothing but a sex toy for them. The one day I was talking to a gg friend of mine and we got to talking about me. I told her how I felt. She told me that if I wanted to meet a nice guy then I have to go where the nice guys are. She told me they are not in clubs or bars. I asked her where do you meet nice guys. She laughed and said, I meet many nice guy on Monday and Tuesday evenings at the laundramat. I laughed and said - Really.

Well that was a while ago. I have been in a great relationship with this wonderful man for a while now. There is nothing like being treated as a woman by a man. Now that I have had a taste of that, I will never go back.

It's only nice men for me from this point on.

Hugs - Susan

[Joy Carter]

While standing on a street fully dressed my gurl-pal and I saw a lovely woman strut by. My usual male side kicked in and I looked and looked again as I commented to my friend about how lovely she was. She told me that part of me should be turned off dressed as I am, or something to that affect. I have to say I never feel an attraction to men in what ever mode I'm in. No judgments here just this is how I am.

[Dee Model]

I feel only attraction to cross-dressers, like me. Other than GGs who own my soul. The bitches. Ever
yone is bi...it's just a matter of degree...

[cdjoanne]

i to am attracted to other cds and often fantasize about being with a man or other cder, i would love to take it one step further and see what it is like to be treated like alady

[Billiesmith]

well cant talk for the others but I am bi but I dont Love men I just love sex.
Having sex dressed is hot for me. Having a man take me like a woman is nothing like just having sex as a man with other men. I just wish I could have more of it.

[RandiCD78209]

I am also new to the CD world. When I dress as Randi I definitely fantasize about having a date with a man...I acted on that urge last month. I can say it didn't seem to make much difference...the end result - clothes off. No CD in your bithday suit! :silly:

[Joyciecd]

When Joycie is dressed and in the company of a man, she responds to foreplay and romancing as a femme. My boyfriends know from experience that I like to be seated on the sofa and have them bring me a glass of wine, then sit beside me and sort of snuggle as we sip and chat. I like to keep my legs up and have them caressed. I always wear stockings and garterbelt. Having those hands on my stockinged legs really gets me going. Things go on from there. On the other hand, when dressed en drab, I have no interest in being with guys. There is more to 'going en femme' for me than merely dressing in femmy clothing. As I am going through the procedure of transforming into Joycie it feels like I am BECOMING a woman. By the time I have finished with the jewelry and makeup. I am a femme and feel totally receptive to being wooed by guys. I expect my guys to treat me like a femme in every way, including the little courtesies and taking the inititive in romancing. I think and feel it is so sensual having a guy remove my clothing as things move along. Having the garter thingys unfastened and having my bra unsnapped really turns me on. I am one CD that really likes romance with guys!

[susiegrl19]

i to am attracted to other cds and often fantasize about being with a man or other cder, i would love to take it one step further and see what it is like to be treated like alady

I couldn't have said it better. My feelings also.

[Eugenie]

I think I know the feeling you're talking about. Being "en femme" and feeling so much like one, it seems to followthrough that being loved by a man would be something we would like. This applies, I think, when a CD really feel like a woman. But some may have felt that way as CD even though many have stated here that this idea never crossed their minds.

Iv'e been exploring my feelings a lot lately and Iv'e even gone through some real life experiences. My partner was another CD who reacted to my cleavage in a masculine fashion... The experience was somewhat agreable but not really satisfying.

I have thought about this a lot. I had no guilt feelings. It felt rather good, so what was missing? I think you named it: a real man plus a more sentimental relationship.

This first encounter was for me too much of an "experiment" to become a great relationship. Not that I didn't have some feelings for my partner, nothing would have happened without feelings. But the real tingle in the heart wasn't there.

Now I know what I would like: being courted nicely and gently seduced by a caring man that would take me for the woman I feel that I am when Eugenie is there. And if things develop on a more intimate level, then "why not?":love:

I feel silly to think that what I'm looking for at age 60 is still "Prince charming" :D

Sounds more lady like, doesn't it...
:hugs:
Eugenie

[susan lewis]

I have dressed for years and finally wanted to see what its like being with a guy. The few experiences i hve had with men have all been positive. They have treated me as a woman and have taken me out on dates. I love people thinking of me as a mans wife or girlfriend. I only desire a man when dressed but have to say I wish I could dress more to be in pulic and and intimate with a man.

[Madeleine]

Sorry but, yes but, no but, (with apologies to Little Britain)

The chocolate highway is a one way street for me. I would love to have a romance with a GG while dressed en femme who may be aroused in a bi-way. This has happened in the past (some 30 odd years ago) and reminicences are recurring as I type...

If only the c(l)ock could go back (sorry about the typing).

Have a lovely Christmas and New Year everyone - got to go back into guy mode for a few days over the holiday season. Get my real mind back in January. Those new forms I got today - Ooohh I could love myself!

Luv and hugs from Madeleine