TG and age

[Maggie Kay]

I'm 55 and while it is pretty obvious that I am TG, it is also clear that gender at my age is really a different matter than it was when I was 30. Had my TG issues surfaced back then as fully as they are now I would be thinking about SRS and full time living etc. However, now what it is the point? No matter how well I dress or look, I will be viewed as an older woman. The desire for the feminine drives my thoughts constantly but every time I look in the mirror I see this old person. Many women at this age have similar issues. Why dress nice now? Why have fancy clothes or makeup at this age? There is something of a Fellini movie going on here for me. To be sure, these thoughts arise partly from "andropause" and a change of life due to loss of career ambitions and children growing up. I suppose that we all have to come to terms with how we are going to live into our "golden years". I try to imagine what I will look like at 80. Will I care then what we look like? Does anybody?

Nonetheless, I have to get up every day and put something on and take care of myself as a responsible adult. SO choices have to be made. I choose to cater to the femme within and that is actually very comforting. It doesn't matter so much what I look like as it matters what I feel about myself and who I really am. Instead of learning to live as an aging male, I'm learning to live as an aging female. In some ways, this is like a rebirth. There is so much to learn and experience. It is all new and that does make me feel younger. "It's a good thing"

Kay

[Lisa Golightly]

I intend on being gloriously decadent till I drop.

[Calliope]

I think being an older female is a great gig! Less pressure to 'look marvelous' and act demure! My primarily inspiration is my mother who has finally 'found herself' at the age of 65. She kicks butt - and I plan to do likewise!

[Holly]

Maturity and femininity are not mutually exclusive. And for Pete's sakes, don't tell the Joan Collins's of the world that they are not still sexy looking ladies. For me, the "golden years" along with the empty nest have given me even more time to explore and embrace my TG. It's been one of the highlights of my life, so far... my :2c:

[rickie121x]

I'm 55 ...... I suppose that we all have to come to terms with how we are going to live into our "golden years". I try to imagine what I will look like at 80. Will I care then what we look like? Does anybody?

.... In some ways, this is like a rebirth. There is so much to learn and experience. It is all new and that does make me feel younger. "It's a good thing"
Kay HI Kay!
Interesting that you have thought about these things - I am sure many have, but not too many write about them. I am 72, and am still nearly as active in my crossdressing notions and activities as ever - actually more as I have a house where no one says un-unh, anymore. That's good and bad....

One of the neat things is that my male reproductive system is not so strongly in control of my brain! Yes it still has a lot of effect as I still react to the late teen age girls looking like full grown women and dressed even more provocatively. That's a tough one.... But I am also taking low doses of hormone influencing herbs, and that has made a nice change in that sexually dominant, combative, superiority seeking male syndrome, and I feel so much more calm and serene. Love that!

Yes, I really care what I look like! As much as ever! But it is a little more difficult to use makeup appropriately and to keep from trying to dress like an appealing 24 year old - I loved that! I also loved the "office look", and the "going to the kids soccer game look", and the "leather Domme" look. Actually I still love that leather look! ...and the feel of the leather. Actually for me not much has changed - just the marks on the calendar.

Rickie :doll:

[Kimberley]

I'm 54 and for me a "look" isnt that important other than to look presentable.

I do wish though that when I was young, the state of medicine we have today existed then. There would be no doubt of my transitioning as a late teen or even young adult. Alas, I took the "safe" route so many of us did, thinking marriage and macho career etc would cure me.

The rest of the story is well documented here on other threads.

All I would like is some peace.

:hugs:
Kimberley

[MarinaTwelve200]

Hey, Im 57, And I dont think I look bad at all---Indeed I can look 20 years or so younger if everything goes right.

I have to say though I looked every bit my age 3 years ago, when I CDed, but I had a breakthrough when I dressed up as a gypsy fortune teller for Halloween 2004. ANd used a different wig and makeup etc. I was shocked at the difference in my appearence---Within a few weeks I was able to use some of my new discoveries to make my self look like my avatar and signature pics.

I was doing everything all wrong. I found that longer wigs were more flattering than short wigs (for me any way) and should have their full color---no greys. I needed more makeup around the eyes and a good foundation.--- Facial expression helps too. women hold the muscles in their faces differently and smile or sorta smile a lot more.

Of course what worked for me wont work for everybody, but dont be afaid to try something radical with your CDing, you might have a happy accident like what inspired my improvement.--In my older pic U can see that I look terrible, like my own mother compaired to the image on the right that is more recent.( I look even better now)

http://i146.photobucket.com/albums/r266/Marina_Twelve/Thennow.jpg

[Sarahgurl371]

I have often pondered the future and how I will age. I really don't care how the male looks at an old age. But really care how the female will look. And it kinda bothers me that I spent all my young years as a male. When they would have been so much better as a female. Obviously so much of this is appearance driven, and to have had the opportunity to be a young woman would've been great. I find myself actually jealous of them. Worrying that I have wasted the best years of my life. And wondering if transitioning would even be worth it because I am only going to get old. Does that make any sense?

[Kimberley]

Oh yeah Tammy, it makes perfect sense. We can age or we can fight it. There are lots of options but in my books, FFS should be done prior to the RLT just to make life easier in transition. I dont know if you have thought about that one or not but the results are worth it by all standards I have seen.

:hugs:
Kimberley

[Maggie Kay]

I envy you gals that can fully express yourself and it is clear that you have turned back the clock with your efforts. I wish I could be as free to express myself too. However, my societal and family situation restrains me and that causes some degree of discomfort.

I think that after 50 many men really give up on the little that they did to keep themselves up and look much older than they really are. They often just have short barber shop hair cuts, let their eyebrows become as bushy as a wild boar and wear just anything to get along. That "old guy" look is actually frightening to me and I suppose it reinforces my efforts to not look that way. I think it is partly because of some old guys that hurt me pretty bad in my youth.

At any rate, there is always tomorrow and I am sure better times will come.

Kay

[Linda Daniels]

Well you all probably know that I am new here. I also feel the regrets of not accepting myself long long ago. I am 58 now and fully realize who I truly am...and I find myself unable to know what exactly to do about it. I think that it must be easier for the girls now to become themselves with all the information & medical services that can be found on the net. ...so much history ...time spent pretending & doing a good job at it ...all I know for certain is that there is now denying it any more. I must move forward. I think I am doing the circular talking thing, sorry...I think that I'll think about all of this and write more later, ok?

Linda

[Joy Carter]

Chin up Kay. I'm fifty seven and I have just gone out for my second time since Halloween. Since coming here I have come to terms with who I am. I'm not the little boy any more who longed to dress as girl every day. I'm a Sr. who has accepted her self as she is. I'm by no means passable when dressed. But dam I do dress nice, even if I do say so. I walk with my head up and show no fear. I make all my contacts with others positive one's so they have more to say about me other than "some guy in a dress". I know it's hard but you need to be here and learn from us gurls to see if this is really right for you. Even if you find that it's not for you. You will find some insight on your self that may help with your feelings. We hope to see you here.

Take Care Joy:D

[Marcie Sexton]

You're not alone, I'm 52 and providing I'm breathing, which I am, getting older every second...I have been a good provider, husband and father...Now is my time ! I have not and will not take away from my family, but I want something for me now...My wife, who is very supportive is amazed how much younger I look enfemme...my advice...get up, get dressed, and get going...I have expanded my adventures by going out in public and my wife has found a new friend to share clothes, makeup, and the girlie girl stuff, and she is no spring chicken, though not old either < 44 >

Enjoy life, it only comes around once...

[Margot]

It's always interesting to get a dialogue on issues of my age interest. At 60 I have just retired and am able to spend more time enfemme. I'm told that being dressed and made up I look at least 10 yrs younger and why not?
I'm looking at more ways to feminize myself. My brows are now plucked thinly and my nails are longer than ever. My wife is going to pierce my ears shortly to allow for greater variation in earring styles. I wear female clothing on a daily basis including sleepwear.
Andropause may be creeping in and I say bring it on. My breasts are almost a "B" and I'm not fat. I've even lost 15 pounds since I retired six months ago.
I am the housewife now and proud of the work I do. I set my hand to embroidering a stocking for Christmas and I didn't do a bad job either.
Would I change sex at this age? I don't think so but my feminine desires are blossoming and I love it.
:hugs:
Margot

[ToyGirl]

Hi Kay

Being adressed and treated as a women , not having to inhibit your emotions , movements and thoughts. Being free?

[GypsyKaren]

All I can say is this...I just turned 54, and I'm having the time of my life! I'm full time and preparing for SRS this year, and I don't care that I'm no spring chicken anymore. So what if I'm to old for Olsen Twins clothes, I still refuse to act my age, and I'm going to have fun till the bitter end. Live life for yourself, we're at the age where we've paid our dues by doing for others, so go out and see what the world has to offer.

Karen

[Scotty]

I'm 41 and in the best shape of my life......wait, that's a commercial :D :D

Seriously I am and I'm thinking since i lived the first half as a guy I'd try the other half, as much as possible since the guy part is so ingrained into my life right now....

I dont' think age matters, it's how you feel that's important.

[joanlynn28]

What do you mean that you are too old? I am 45 and transitioning and long past ready for the RLT, I'm already living it just make it official. And I have plenty of older TS aquitances that waited until their spouses passed away or until the children got older. So don't let age be the reason.:2c:

[Sejd]

Hi, great thread! take a look at me as I looked in Maj of 2006 and then later in December of the same year. Who the hell was the ol' man? I know that I'm 55 but I feel twenty years younger since I began embracing my true self.
To night at Yoga, I got the best compliment I have gotten in a long time. After the class, in the reception area, the teacher looks at me and says, "You don't really give a hoot about anything but yourself in there do you?"
I looked at her surprised and very flattered.
"No that's right, I don't, I'm here to enjoy myself. I am 55 and it's time I began doing just that."
To me, what she said was like I had truly come home to myself. And I did enjoy looking at my posture in the mirror, straight back, my hair now almost to the shoulders, and my happy face. Age? as long as we can cew Kneidalech in the Mazo soup and are not in a hospital, life can be quite great!
hugs
Sejd:hugs:

[Lanore]

When I was younger, I was attracted to older women. I always wanted to look like one. Now that I'm 55, I've become who I admired. I don't really think about my age as much as how I feel. I feel 18 most of the time, but I don't want to look 18. Those people really stand out. I like to think of myself as a nice looking older women who takes care of herself. Very comfortable in my present situation and lifestyle and look forward to what the next day will bring.

Lanore

[MarieTS]

JoanLynn28, I'd be interested to know if your "TS acquaintances" who transitioned later in life experienced successfull transitions and are happy with their choice. Did they have any common problems incidental to their advanced age, and did their grown children shun them? Would they do it again?

[janedoe311]

and am suppressing my gender confusion and paying the toll.
I am married and have two kids both under 8, and they come first.

My obsession with being a woman has to be pushed out of my mind. Not sure what to do about it. Crossdressing does not work and I have not time by myself anyway.

My wife knows of my gender confusion but not to the extent, it has been getting worse over the years.

That is why I am here it is a little release as is being a woman on Second life.

[Linda Daniels]

Hi Marie...I am also in the Pacific Northwest & would also like to know how the older TG's have made out with their transitions.

Linda

[melissaK]

Hmmm. I liked this thread and everyone's comments to date. But, I can't seem to figure out myself enough to post a meaningful response.

I guess its asking about my own future. I am emerging from someplace like janedoe311's status (be strong janedoegirl - IMHO get in counselling too) as the kids are grown, older generation of family has passed away, and after a pretty good breakdown I am moving to some place new (not physically - but mentally).

I am making up my mind about my course down the river of my life a day at a time - waiting for the 'twainsman's call to the pilot house with every course change . . . .

And, God willing, old age is downriver somewhere. We'll see if this ole riverboat makes it as the Mississippi Queen or as the Robert E. Lee. :heehee:

[janedoe311]

I guess its asking about my own future. I am emerging from someplace like janedoe311's status (be strong janedoegirl - IMHO get in counselling too) as the kids are grown, older generation of family has passed away, and after a pretty good breakdown I am moving to some place new (not physically - but mentally).

This place is great, get no support from home.

[Siobhan Marie]

This place is great, get no support from home.

Totally agree with you Jane.

:hugs: Anna Marie x

[Josie06]

and am suppressing my gender confusion and paying the toll.
I am married and have two kids both under 8, and they come first.

My obsession with being a woman has to be pushed out of my mind. Not sure what to do about it. Crossdressing does not work and I have not time by myself anyway.

My wife knows of my gender confusion but not to the extent, it has been getting worse over the years.

That is why I am here it is a little release as is being a woman on Second life.

Thanks Jane. You have stated it quite well. Me too, married with four children. Thought I'm finally comfortable with who I am after years of wrestling with myself. Like you, for me others come first I will have to wait. Unlike you no one knows. That's why I am here, to read, listen and talk with others like me. My time will come and then I'll get to be myself.

[joanlynn28]

JoanLynn28, I'd be interested to know if your "TS acquaintances" who transitioned later in life experienced successfull transitions and are happy with their choice. Did they have any common problems incidental to their advanced age, and did their grown children shun them? Would they do it again?
Well the best way would be to go and buy her semiautographic book that has recently been published entitled "Norma's Voice" by Norma Posy. I think a link to find out where to purchase a copy is probably on LadiesNightOutSanDiego. She also gave the story of her life at the last national meeting of MENSA.

[Siobhan Marie]

Well the best way would be to go and buy her semiautographic book that has recently been published entitled "Norma's Voice" by Norma Posy. I think a link to find out where to purchase a copy is probably on LadiesNightOutSanDiego. She also gave the story of her life at the last national meeting of MENSA.

I've just found it on Amazon UK and have added it to my wishlist. Here's the link http://www.amazon.co.uk/gp/product/1933720077/ref=wl_it_dp/202-3551405-9561416?ie=UTF8&coliid=IT1R4XA4JVXI5&colid=2E0BCKPRM0FLE

:hugs: Anna Marie x

[Kristina_Maree]

Janedoe + Josie,

I'm in a similar situation and although I have only recently found this forum, I think it's great - and I'm sure to spend lots of time in here :happy:

Kristina

[Maggie Kay]

I have had no success in holding the line in the progression of TG expression. The more I hold it back the stronger it becomes. The main subject of the thread is age factors in TG and one of the main thing for me is that at my age, I can't wait anymore. My life is passing by and if I don't let myself have these comforts now, I may not get to enjoy my life, ever.... I don't mean to be selfish and am dedicated to my family too. But a family is the last refuge for us to be ourselves. The world is cruel and harsh and getting worse but in our homes, we must strive to be ourselves. We ALL should have that right not just the other non TG members of our families. Isn't that part of what love is about?