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Avsblues19
12-16-2006, 02:59 AM
I have a problem. Well, not really a problem, more of a question. There is a skin care store in one of the two major malls in the Dayton, OH area. I know the owner. She is my mom's cousin. My brother, uncle, and I stopped by (before we went to a hockey game) and said hello. We began to talk since it had been such a long time since we had seen eachother. After talking about some personal stuff she asked if we wanted any skin care products or some soap. We said no. She then asked if we needed any lipstick. I smiled and chuckled a little bit and said no. However, even though I am not a big makeup person, I would love to have her help me with picking out some. She doesn't know I crossdress. I would also love to have her help in shopping.

My question is whether I should tell her I would love some makeup, which would result in my outing to her, or should I just keep it down inside. I don't know her well enough on where she stands on such issues. I am also afraid she will tell family members, which would be devastating. What should I do?

Marla S
12-16-2006, 03:16 AM
The best one to judge this is you.
If you don't know her good enough to make an educated guess, I wouldn't tell her right now.
She might know something about TG in general, because it is likely that she had TG customers already.

I'd visit her once in a while, start some small talk, show interest in her job, etc. and see how it goes.
I think you will know better than what to do or not.

suzy
12-16-2006, 03:20 AM
This question is one that you have to decide on your own, I'm afraid. Remeber to be careful in deciding when to disclose....once it's out....it can't go back in.

Careful consideration as to repercussions is in order....and smile a lot.:hugs:

Robin Leigh
12-16-2006, 06:36 AM
What a dilemma, Avsblues!

Do you come out to her, getting assistance for your femme side & doing your part to improve TG awareness? Or do you keep quiet, knowing there's a possibility that she will tell other members of the family?

Only you can decide, we don't know your family well enough to give much advice. :)

If she is professional, she shouldn't blab about her clients' private lives. Sure, she can share stories if she so desires, but "true names must not be revealed, in order to protect the innocent".

I'm curious though. What were 3 GMs doing, "dropping in" to a skincare place? Is she a hottie? :D

:hugs:

Robin

Avsblues19
12-17-2006, 06:15 PM
I'm curious though. What were 3 GMs doing, "dropping in" to a skincare place? Is she a hottie? :D

:hugs:

Robin

I think she is a hottie. We were in there saying hi since she is a relative.

jjjjohanne
12-18-2006, 08:08 AM
There are skin care products that are supposed to help reduce the red bumps that arise from shaving your face. You can start a conversation talking about products for men. If she gets into sales mode, she might not make jokes about selling you feminine products... You can make a joke like, "...And what lipstick color do you recommend for me?" Then laugh. If she starts telling you about any product, then you can just ask some curious questions like, "What does that mean?" or "Why are there so many shades?" If you seem impressed, or show interest in what she knows a lot about (not feminine interest) she will feel appreciated and important. If the conversation goes anywhere, you can say, maybe I'll let you give me a makeover one day if I have a costume party to go to. You can possibly leave out the costume party comment.

Do be careful. You are probably not the first CD to cross her path. She will probably be able to detect you if you are not very discreet. You know your personality and what will work and what is "not like you."

Sedona
12-18-2006, 08:35 AM
Hi,

I think the real question is do you want to come out to her and your family?

There are lots of other places to get quality cosmetics advice from, so there's really no special reason to ask her, other than you probably have some desire to come out to your family. Other than marching in with a slip of paper and saying "I think my SO wants this for Christmas/birthday," it's tough to buy any of the super-girly products like lipstick or mascara without suspicions being raised.

You don't know her well, and unless you have a LOT of trust built up, assume that she'll out you.

Sorry, but that's how I see things. Best of luck!

Avsblues19
12-18-2006, 11:27 PM
Thanks everyone for your advice.

JJJJohanne, I think everything there is made for women. But maybe if I ask her if she has any male stuff she could reply no and maybe give me some information on some womens products that will do the same thing.

Sedona,
The reason I want to tell her is because she is family. The internet has many dangerous people out there, not on this board, and having a family member help would keep that dangerous element out.

Felicia Conti
12-18-2006, 11:35 PM
Thanks everyone for your advice.

JJJJohanne, I think everything there is made for women. But maybe if I ask her if she has any male stuff she could reply no and maybe give me some information on some womens products that will do the same thing.

Sedona,
The reason I want to tell her is because she is family. The internet has many dangerous people out there, not on this board, and having a family member help would keep that dangerous element out.

I would think long and hard on this one. There are people that I thought about coming out to in the past and am thrilled that I chose not to as I found out they were not trustworthy later on. Someone said earlier that once you do this, you can't take it back. Good luck!

sandra-leigh
12-19-2006, 12:27 AM
My question is whether I should tell her I would love some makeup, which would result in my outing to her,

Do you know a local crossdresser, not known to her, who could go in and do a trial buy? Then if she doesn't treat them well or doesn't know how to sell to them, you'll know it couldn't work for you.

Avsblues19
12-19-2006, 12:49 AM
Do you know a local crossdresser, not known to her, who could go in and do a trial buy? Then if she doesn't treat them well or doesn't know how to sell to them, you'll know it couldn't work for you.

I had a crossdressing friend from about an hour away e-mail her saying this: "I was wondering if u could help a crossdresser with a consulation and
makeup. And would it be a problem if I were to arrive dressed up."

Her reply was:
Hi!

After the 1st of the year, you are more then welcome to come in for a
consultation. I am here Mon-Fri 10-5.

Thanks,
Debbie

Robin Leigh
12-19-2006, 01:22 AM
Her reply was:
Hi!

After the 1st of the year, you are more then welcome to come in for a
consultation. I am here Mon-Fri 10-5.

Cool! It sounds like you should be fine to visit her. But it might be wise to wait till you get a report back from your "spy". :)

:hugs:

Robin