tg = costume?

[princessmichelle]

A dress and impants are not a woman.

From a Superman costume : WARNING: WEARING OF CAPE DOES NOT ENABLE USER TO FLY

I laughed, but I also wondered if cd-ing is much different: I can wear female clothes, even get surgery if I could afford it, but who am I kidding?

I wish I was female, but I'm not. And can't be. Is grs much more than a _better_ costume?

Michelle

[CaptLex]

I guess I don't really get that. I'm male, regardless of what I'm wearing - the clothes help me express that, but they don't make me male. Even when I take them off and look in the mirror and see what's underneath, I don't feel that way. As I see it, my body is the costume and it's what makes others not see the real me. Not telling you what you're feeling is wrong, just that I see it differently in my case.

[Kieron Andrew]

As I see it, my body is the costume and it's what makes others not see the real me

im with Capt on this one.....i see it different

[Marla S]

From a Superman costume : WARNING: WEARING OF CAPE DOES NOT ENABLE USER TO FLY
I think it works the other way round: IF YOU ARE ABLE TO FLY, YOU BETTER WEAR A CAPE.

But you are right in a way. Sometimes, if it comes to herbal hormones or temporary breast enlargement, this sounds a bit like the extension of the wardrobe.

[MarinaTwelve200]

You are not confusing CD with TG /TS are you?. CDing is something one does , not what one is. A TS, for example, WILL CD---as dressing in female clothing may feel approprate.

For us non TS types, I think that CDing is "prop" of sorts that we may use to present the outward appearence of a woman, which indeed may BE a disguise, technically. (It is certianly more than a disguise to a fetisht CD,) its lilely used to AID the fantasy of being a woman or "non-male" person to push the fantasy up to another notch of reality--to the point where part of the brain can be fooled into having taken on another identity.

I think ACTORS do this too---Change identites for their "jollies"---but us CDers have to push it a bit more to get our kicks than an ordinary actor type would---we vicariously change our "sex" as well.

[Kristen Kelly]

Half empty/ half full, chicken or the egg.......Questions without an answer, it's how you look at it. The clothes are an extension of my personality and who I perceive myself as. The real me is who I am, no matter what I am wearing, and that is femine

[SilkenPrincess]

As I see it, my body is the costume and it's what makes others not see the real me.

EXCELLENT analogy! I agree wholeheartedly!

[Teresa Amina]

But a costume is temporary, grs is permanent, therefore not the same. Unless you're going to use superglue with that superman cape:D

[pocoyo]

I think Cap an Marina are right.
Too tired to make much sense but TS is a different thing than plain CDing, although the 2 obviously cross over (as transexual people will obviously dress in the opposite physical sex's clothes).*
We are all a mixture of male and female anyway, the outside is just how other people will see us and how we may feel comfortable. If someone is mainly a woman inside, it is nice to be seen as such.

Of course due to so many shades of grey (different levels of CDing etc) things can get very confusing too. It could also be confusing for a man who enjoys CDing very much, but likes to be a man, yet finds himself drawn deeper into desiring to be a woman... all sorts of questions arise... is he really a woman in a man's body and he had kept that repressed? Or does he just want to permanently stay in his relax/playtime? etc etc.

I get your point about adding to the costume if it was a male crossdresser who just dressed for fun (CD), but a woman in a man's body (TS)... well that is different and she should transition to make her complete and happy... so her outsides match her insides!.

I know that this doesn't make too much sense but I really am too tired to get it into a coherant post!! You will get the drift I'm sure hehe :o

*Incidentally, interestingly, most FTM's are not just "crossdressers" but actually feel transexual. (A boy in a girl's body).

[Calliope]

Ultimately, I think it's all about living the life of the gender you know you are.

Most people thought was Van Gogh was crap. Was he?

[Felix]

Great thread...I've looked at this twice and now I think I am ready to say how I feel. I think what I wear does express what is going on inside me I feel good when I'm expressing the inner me to the world. It feels right even if all the bits aren't right xx Felix :hugs:

[princessmichelle]

Ultimately, I think it's all about living the life of the gender you know you are.

Most people thought was Van Gogh was crap. Was he?

Hi Daytripper,

I love your first point, but I am confused about your second. What about Van Gogh?

Michelle

[Kimberley]

I agree with Felix. A TG or TS will WANT to be 24/7, will want to transition but may not. That does not make them any less but does make things a lot tougher.

For the TV/CD then dressing is mostly expression of a part of their personality.

I also think Marina has hit on an important point, that of mass hysteria (which we have seen all too often) where one fools themself into thinking they are TG or TS. I dont want to get into that pandora's box but it does happen all too often.

:hugs:
Kimberley

[michelle19845]

what can make one ts is that they are not comfy and depressed or anxiety-like about their birth sex and want to not be it they have emotions that are more towards the female side and interests also.when someone sees a man they may say grab a shove! a woman,they say "excuse me mam,would you like to help dig?" in lots of cases atleats.point is women are generally more sensitive and emotional and can't handle the same treatment always that men get.read "men are from mars,women are from venus".it explains a general difference.
men tend to care more about cracking joke s in a lot of cases but not all to make their egos bigger and women are mostly more caring and feeeling for others and more understanding.men express by what they do,women by what they wear.some cases it changes who one likes men or women for sig other.they transition due to a big effect on how they live day to day because it is so hard on them being viewed as what gendr they aren't ,but they were born to.examples are depression,anxiety,suicide thoughts,not be intersexed;meaning not have both reproductive organs or combos,interference with family,social life and or work also the person doing things of what they can to make their appearance more towards the desired sex such as styling hair more of the desired sex,plucking eyebrows,shaving always to not have hair showing on body.when these things are happening it shows that the person is gender dysphoric and needs treatment towards being able to be at one with themselves.
when they are viewed and read as the desired sex they feel better and calmed and have a successful life and can now live.lots become lawyers,doctors,scientists,etc ,due to the wide expanded brain.most times a cder posts ,they misspell words and represent the theory men are more mathematic and women are more grammar related/spellers. hope that fills ya in.

[Kimkandy]

I laughed, but I also wondered if cd-ing is much different: I can wear female clothes, even get surgery if I could afford it, but who am I kidding?

I wish I was female, but I'm not. And can't be. Is grs much more than a _better_ costume?

OK costume or getting your :eek: balls chopped off and your :confused2: penis turned inside out... you don't want to be confusing these two things...

A costume is something you choose to wear or not... surgery is forever.

Kim

:dom: :bonk: :bonk: :bonk:

[AmyCarter]

Who is ever a 100 percent of anything? This entire topic seems moot to me. Everything is merely what that single person makes it out to be.

[Lisa Golightly]

Beware deconstruction.... Is language a costume... Is civilisation... Is existance? That way lies beards, muttering, and madness, or as its costume name would have it... Philosophy.

[Marla S]

Beware deconstruction.... Is language a costume... Is civilisation... Is existance?
Yes, as long as you are not transcultured.
Existance is a differnt category though.

[Sarahgurl371]

Well If I was confused enough before! I think the problem here is that everyone has a different definition of what the terms mean. The problem is that we are dealing with people. People are all different. We have different life experiences. Different opinions. And try as we might, communicating our thoughts and emotions regarding all these feelings is extremely difficult.

How do your perceive the color blue? How do you explain the color blue? I think we can all point to it and say "that is blue" but how do we know that we all see the same thing?

We all sit here, trying to determine what we are. Where do I fit? What am I? And yes, I believe that some, even me perhaps, can be confused. Fact of the matter is, to me anyway, is that for some reason certain people are happy and comfortable with CDing, or makeing some body changes, or having surgeries. No one knows where the line will be for me, or you. We only know ourselves, when we get there. And although some may think it a huge burden, thankfully there are mental health professionals to assist us along the journey.

About the costume thing. I think that most people in society wear one. Some more than others. But most are costuming something. We are just not that good at being ourselves. The risks are high. The question for me, is which one is the costume?

The point I would like to get to is that I am happy with the appearance, and comfortable inside with it. Then, if I possess that, I really don't care what anyone else thinks of it. The goal here for me, in determining what "costume" I wear everyday, is what I think about it. Not what you think. After all, you are not me.

[Maggie Kay]

I can fully relate to the idea of your point. Even with GRS, we still have not been our desired gender by birth. Every cell has the tell-tale signature of the XY chromosome when we wanted XX. There is no growing up as a girl for most MTFs. This is a sad fact. It is "water under the bridge" as my grandmother used to say. Still, we do have to get up every day and wear something and interact with the world. I too have grieved over not being the "real me" all these many years. Sorrows are not everything in life but we do carry them with us daily. Coping, any way we can, is all we have and if that is a form of a costume, then fine. The point is that this "costume" is not trivial as it is in the case of the Superman example. The TG's costume is a way to get through an otherwise impossible contradiction.

I go through cycles of giving up on the "costume" and temporarily return to "normal" attire. Almost immediately, I am reminded that the "normal" attire makes me feel very "abnormal". In fact, today I am writing this in drab. I have had a downer weekend and the effort to once again go against society's and family's norms is too much. However, even in these down periods, I can't reverse the effects of hormone treatment and the breasts are a permanent reminder of my inner identity. They are a comfort and show me that my TG issues are not going away. Tomorrow, I'll get it back in the road again and continue my real life...

Kay

[janedoe311]

If someone is wearing an outfit that is not “normal” for their gender it is not a costume but a self expression of ones inner ID.

GRS is not a costume it is a treatment for an illness,(birth defect), even if some refuse to see Gender Identity Disorder as a birth defect.

GRS does not make a woman or man it is simply is a “peace of mind” for those who are in the wrong body. I am not religious so I do not have that bias, but most people are religious and for them you cannot change your gender, (ask the Pope), only the outward appearance. I see GRS as a lesser of two “evils”.

A question for you “What percentage of transsexuals are sorry they had GRS or still not happy afterward?”

It has been said, that we cannot be who we are because of this society needing everyone to have a static label, either male or female. Androgynous is not acceptable, (look into those that are actually born androgynous and the ID problems they have their entire life!)

So to make the society happy and us sane we get GRS, not the best solution but the only one available at this time. (Until gender changing booths are invented).

[SilkenPrincess]

But a costume is temporary, grs is permanent, therefore not the same. Unless you're going to use superglue with that superman cape:D

I understand where you're coming from, but I think I should expound on my meaning, so I can be understood. I am a person of faith. I view the body as temporary, but the soul inside as eternal. The body is just the shell that I, the one inside, lives in. Scripture refers to it as a tent. Something I sit in, carry around, and take care of, but not who I am. In that view, even grs is temporary. It is not my body that will continue, but rather that which is inside. Regardless of how my shell looks, I am the same inside. And also, regardless of how it looks, it IS temporary.
Steph

[RonnaDee]

I am in agreement with Kristen on this: "The real me is who I am, no matter what I am wearing, and that is femine."

Many you meet in public do not show their true selves and thus are in costume.:tongueout