Potency and sensuality and the Difference as a Female

[Susan Saunders]

I love to love. I love to be sensual.From 16-17 on I loved sex and sexuality.
As a male I can love but find I am more sensual than aggressive (not passive though) just more sensual.
As a woman Im more sensual and it really fits more my style but I want control in the sense and feel I dont want to be someones girl except for a short time to feel more like a girl (if that happened)
I dont want to give up that need to be in control (I also respect the other person so dont need to control but need to be IN control)
Im suddenly accepting my sexuality as confusing as it has been over the years but still hold back from a certain amount of fear (I mean there ARE things to be afraid of for anyone)
Would love to hear some views about this.

[Karren H]

Hmmmmm.... What's sex again?? Been married over 30 years and I'm kind of getting forgetfull in my old age!! hehe

:D

Love Karren

[Susan Saunders]

Karen Ive always love it (sex and sexuality) even at times when I havent had it...its so much a part of me..but I hate ****ty and love sensuality...

[michelleliz]

Don't worry Honey The Sex Will slow down with age. Age and meds will kill the feeling So look what you have to look fordward to

Michelle Liz

[Robin Leigh]

I can take on either a dominant or submissive role, but really I prefer to relate to my lover as perfect equals. This can be easier to achieve in a group scenario than in a couple... :devil:

:hugs:

Robin

[Lanore]

I have found, that as I get older my sex drive slows down, but my femm desires speed up. It's like trading one feeling for another. I can live with that.

Lanore

[susie evans]

sex it does not seem as important as it once was but i still enjoy it and it takes longer now don't no if it's the meds are the old age butt i'am young when it comes to dressing:hugs:

[ABJanel]

yes as I age my libido is not what its used to be but dressing up seems to make up for it...:rolleyes:

[Susan Saunders]

I guess part of the question was from my male side. As a male Ive always been a good lover but more a lover than a hard nosed screwer.I always adored women.I always questioned my ability to screw hard but my sensuality was always intense.

As a woman,and to be frank Ive not done this physically with any male,I am very sensual and comfortable with the sensual feminine bottom.I do think about it every day and with my wife even want to be like that.
I would love to try it out there but really am afraid of getting into territory I couldnt handle.

[Trinni]

That is a tough question to answer. I'm not sure if you are afriad you will lose control or your wife won't take your desires in a good way. If she doesn't know about your feelings you might want to take it slow and try to get an idea how she feels about it first. Some time people will surprise you and feels what ever makes you happy will make them happy. Unfortunaly that is not always the case. When it comes to losing control, only your heart can answer that.

[Susan Wade]

I feel much more sensual as a woman. As a man I am considered attractive, but as a woman I feel feminine and KNOW how to act as a woman. I love appealing to men and feeling sexy.

Truth is that most men and pretty simple ...it is much more fun being a woman. I love being sexy and in control and the men that I have been with love that too.

I am submissive but always in control. It is really enjoyable and exciting.

For me on the bottom is the place to be. But, I can be flexible ..I just want to know that my partner is enjoying himself and is satisfied.

I find sex as a woman richer and more pleasurable.

Happy New Year ....Hope this is a wonderful one for you.

[Susan Saunders]

I think its a conundrum of sorts.
Ideally I would like really the best of both worlds.I like the feeling of my comfort zone and yet would love to experience my desires.The gamble is big though,obviously .She wouldnt understand and really who could blame her.
For me when I was younger it was confusing to have the feeling of dressing and also be a straight male.It took me lots of time to understand my feelings and accept them.So in some ways I am still within myself.Its of course safe but also frustrating at the same time. The sexual element to dressing is big for me and I see that we CD's are all different.Some have little sexual component.For me its what brings the dressing to light or more so the other way around.Its not just sex infact its more being at the height of sensuality which I feel is a great feeling. Just wearing fine hose makes me feel that way.But to experience it alone is limited really I find as anything even a movie.

[Susan Saunders]

Susan Wade,I guess we wrote our posts at the same time!
Thank you for your comments,I can relate the feeling at least if not the action yet.
And a good year for you too and everyone else here!

[marie354]

After the teen thru 20's ''lust'' days, I learned that relationships aren't about sex. Yea, it's great when it happens, but I let the pieces fall where they may. Most women I have known, except the ones that were sexually driven, don't want to thought of as ''sex objects''. Neither do I. I've always respected women as I do respect all of the wonderful ladies here. I see no differance there.
As far as fears... There are people out there that will never understand us, and we should be fearful of some of them that may cause us harm. These kind of people probably beat their wives or girlfriends as well as they can't understand them either.
Stay in the light... Go into the light, go into the light, there is safety in the light... Not to make a joke out of this, but dark alleys can be dangerous.
Sensuality? Of course! I feel more sensual when I'm dressed because I feel women ARE more sensual.
Now Control... I don't know if you have noticed, but women usually have the last word about most things. If that isn't control, than what is?
Women are the major buying power. Not only do they shop for themselves, but their husbands, kids, grandkids, and friends. Now there's real power!
A lot are just housewives. Not that that is an easy job. My first wife and I swapped roles for a day and there is really a lot to do just to be a homemaker without kids, and when children are in the picture, it's much harder.
I hope I havn't gone too far off the subject, but I'm a gabby person.
Love you girls,
Sandy :hugs: :love:

[RobertaFermina]

I KNOW that I will get pleasure from sex through the pleasure of my parther, and by getting what I want as, or after she gets her attention/release fulfillment. I feel I get both Love and Sensual Richness and Sexual Release by committing first to give it with gratitude that my partner wants me to be there and give. (gratitude also that TheUniverse/Mystery/God(pick one) has given us the opportunity to exist, encounter, and serve each other).

This feels feminine to me, and has always been my way.

Lately, I have been having non-sexual relationships, where cuddling of my parther, and sensual play, or even childish play is the bedroom activity. It heightens intimacy and takes the pressure of performance away. I don't feel I lose very much, and gain a lot. In this mode, It feels like there are two feminine presences, and my unconditional giving feels both feminine and masculine - can't really analyze that one - just how it feels.

As I sit here I realize sometimes I cuddle feminine-to-feminine, or masculine-to-feminine, and sometimes all gender is obliterated and it is being-to-being.......

With Sex, I trade control, letting the woman's needs and desires dominate foreplay and initiation of the act, and, usually, once the woman is open, she grants control for more vigorous and dominating control to me. Not always that way, however that is the common pattern. I like that.

I have never expeienced sex "enfemme", or as Roberta. All this experience has been in the past as Bob.

[Susan Saunders]

Thank you all so far for the enlightenment.Marie354 your post was great.I feel though although I am much older than 20's that I still feel that sexual lust feeling.It just IS. I agree though that the light is most important and THE most important ultimately even if we have human and personal needs along the way.Its certainly al least a balance.it just frustrating if the balance is more light and less of some of those things.But those things come with a price,you are right.It would be so nice to have it all wouldnt it and STILL bask in the light! Your post brought me down a little to earth though.Thanks.