PDA

View Full Version : This site?



occdresser
01-04-2007, 11:07 PM
:eek: Is there anyone out there who would not dare share this site with their significant other? Am I the only one who is affraid to show their SO this site? :hmph: I dont know what my S.O. would think about this site.

crossing-the-rain
01-04-2007, 11:10 PM
I won't tell her about this site,but I think my kids know I'm a member here.
Rain

nancy58
01-04-2007, 11:19 PM
I haven't shared this site with my SO. I have mixed feelings about it. Part of it is that I enjoy being able to speak freely without being answerable to her for what I say, and I would lose that luxury if she read my posts. But I realize that I am losing the opportunity to talk with her about CDing a little more than I do. I'm not sure whether she would want to look at it, though. She'd just as soon this part of me didn't exist.

Nancy

Amanda Jane
01-05-2007, 01:00 AM
would she feel better reading all this stuff

Eugenie
01-05-2007, 03:36 AM
My wife knows that I x-dress. She knows I'm often sharing ideas and making comments on x-dressing related forums and let me do it. But she doesn't want to talk about it.

So it is unlikely that she would ever want to get on this or any other sites that discuss x-dressing...

Knowing her she may very well have "googled" the subject since she is quite open minded in general and fond of internet sources, but with her husband, this is hitting to close to home...
:hugs:
Eugenie

Rebecca_Annette
01-05-2007, 03:41 AM
I honestly don't think my SO would approve of a site like this now.

At one time she tried to talk me into us going to a local venue which has an evening for crossdressers, at the time I wasn't ready. Now that I am ready, she no longer is, and I'm not too certain that she would even be very keen on the idea of me going alone.

(But then I'm not sure that I would be too keen on that idea, either :()

deakane
01-05-2007, 04:35 AM
Just a peice of info. Just for laughs this morning I did a yahoo search for deakane. To my surprise it pulled up atleast 2 or 3 of the post that I have made here on this forum. They were all on the first page of the search results too. Kind of made me think a little.

Gunda
01-05-2007, 05:09 AM
In the closet so I don't share my participation here with my friends or family. A shame really as it would be nice to relate to them some of the interesting discussions here.

Gunda

Joy Carter
01-05-2007, 05:23 AM
Just a peice of info. Just for laughs this morning I did a yahoo search for deakane. To my surprise it pulled up atleast 2 or 3 of the post that I have made here on this forum. They were all on the first page of the search results too. Kind of made me think a little.


Ditto's ! I'm getting spam in my gurl name as well.:Angry3:

EmmaB GG
01-05-2007, 06:48 AM
I'm a SO, and have only been with my past/possible future CDing partner for a few months, but this site has been an eyeopener for me - yes, there's lots about makeup and clothes but there are also gems like this that give me a small insight into minds other than mine and my SO's. And it's really helping me!

If your SO is supporting you anyway to even a small degree, then am sure she'll be OK with it - it doesn't go far away from her ever, and can create big lows in her even if she's the most supportive person you know, but knowing there's someone out there you can "talk" to is great!

Maybe print off some of the more insightful threads for her to read first, then decide what to do.

Good luck

DAVIDA
01-05-2007, 06:53 AM
Sorry, I tell Jean everything! She is glad that I found this forum! It has done so much for me.
Love DAVIDA

TxKimberly
01-05-2007, 06:56 AM
I wouldn't have any problem with her reading any of my posts, but there ARE posts on here by others I wouldn't care for her to see. (Wow - THAT sounds holier than thou doesn't it?!)

Kim

Sandra
01-05-2007, 07:00 AM
I can understand why some would not like their SO to see this site for some it would proably scare the living daylights out of them, but they can learn a lot from here and also realise that they are not one their own, other GGs are here in the same situation.

Christina Nicole
01-05-2007, 08:01 AM
No, I would not want her to look at this forum. There are too many threads about a cross dressing guy who wants to have sex with other men. Then there are the posts where someone writes something like "I become a real woman when dressed instead of a man, so it's OK to seduce and have sex with other men." That sounds nutty to me and I'm TG. I probably sounds way out there insane to the uninitiated.

It's hard enough being TG with a spouse who is does accept it. Some of the crazy things I have seen here would just make things worse -- much worse.

Warm regards,
Christina Nicole

Marcie Sexton
01-05-2007, 08:11 AM
My wife know I visit here often...calls it my site:heehee: ...The only thing she stresses to me is caution...for me, her and my son, which isn't all that unusual...< gotta know the area > but then I would suppose all of us need to do the same, yet I feel comfortable and at ease here with all my friends.

Gary
01-05-2007, 08:29 AM
My wife introduced ME to the site...so i never had to make that decision...i was concerned about the whole "how honest can i be here" thing so we agreed that neither of us could use in any way anything the other posted here against them or to start an argument, prove a point, whatever. so far it has worked well. i am glad she has this site as it has helped her when i wasnt able or just didnt understand, I am glad i have this site as it has helped me to understand things i could not wrap my little brain around...so for us it has been a saving place, for our marriage and our sanity, wouldnt want it any other way...gary

EmmaB GG
01-05-2007, 08:31 AM
I agree that finding something that's more extreme than the norm would be very scary, and there are some GG's who will look for it just out of curiosity. But if you're honest with them and they trust you, surely they'll understand where you stand with all that?

But you need to remember that there's plenty of info of all sorts out there for CDs, but nothing for us partners unless we go to sites like this - and when I was looking, I found many other sites that did scare me because of the obsessiveness of the writers!

If ever you feel isolated and lonely, please remember that there is a big support network out there for CD's - there isn't one for us, so how lonely is that? I'm in a chat room, talking to people I don't know, possibly 1000,s of miles away, yet not knowing what's going on in my SO's head when it's right next to me. Instead of being able to go out with a friend and get advice & support, I have to mask my feelings with trivial day to day stuff til he comes home, then try to get it all out in one go which can cause problems.

As someone said earlier on another thread, is it too much to hope that we'll understand you, when perhaps you don't understand yourself?

EmmaB GG
01-05-2007, 08:35 AM
Gary - just read your post - v encouraged by what you say so maybe I'll do the same at some point. At the moment this is my little comfort zone & want to keep it as that for a short while.

Thank you!
Ex

Samantha Lough
01-05-2007, 08:43 AM
Well My SO knows about this site and she helps me fraze my words sometimes when I pose a question or a idea but she does not want to invade my space here which I have welcome her to do, but she feels that I need a place beside my councilor and home life to express my self.... And yes I have invited her to join up

Cheryl GG
01-05-2007, 08:45 AM
I found this site before he did....I love him - this is a part of him and I want to know all I can know about every part of him....I cant hide from things - never have been able to......and its been easier on us to talk with other cders and SOs.....but thats us....I would suggest it to any couple.....just my :2c: .....xoxoxoxoxoxC/

Marla S
01-05-2007, 09:11 AM
Though my ex knew about this site, I wouldn't have recommended her to visit it, because she would have found a lot of her concern affirmed.
That's a pity, 'cause there is a lot of usufull information here too.

Emily Ann Brown
01-05-2007, 09:48 AM
My ex knew I was a member of a webgroup, but wanted nothing to do with a place where "you get makeup and sex tips!" Oh well....wouldn't have wanted to inflict her on you gals anyhow.

My current girlfriend IS a member here...HEY PRINCESS !!!

Emily Ann

Michelle 51
01-05-2007, 10:29 AM
OOCDRESSER I agree with you.This is a great site but our degree of cding and our goals go from a to z and for us married ones it could be confusing and just add to her fears of where is my husdand fit in all of this .If i do come out to the wife i.ll let her get her feet wet in some tri-ess sites because their goal seems to be more about married CDers and their family's and they carry some good info for our SO's

JoAnnDallas
01-05-2007, 12:42 PM
I would think that my SO would join this forum, but since she does not know about my other self, there is NO WAY I would introduce her to this site or any other CD site.

kathy gg
01-05-2007, 01:02 PM
Well if you are out to your wife....I guess it depends on how much her scope of knowledge if on the tg spectrum.

I mean, if you are a newbie and never even knew what crosssdressing was, and you come here, well it can be an eye-opener toa whole world going on right below the surface of the world they *thought* they knew. I certainly have seen some gg friends not involved with the community marvel at how much info can be learned on this subject, the vast numbers alone are staggering.

And if someone deos nto know all the ermanology, well it can be intimidating and scary.

I also think if you have a spouse who is pretty firmly entreched in non-acceptance then chances are, this site won't make or change her opinion to the positive. Not because it is racy or taudry...just because there are things which might contradict info you have given her about WHO you are.

I think a big mistake SO's who are new make is lumping people in the communtiy into one bg pot. Assuming all must want to eventually transition or sexualy experiment or just generally make sweeping assumptions.

I am not *jaded* per se', but I have been around it for almost ten years now as a participating part of it. I have pretty much seen everything there is to see, and nothing shocks or surprises me anymore...well on occasion maybe!:D , but mostly I am pretty much numb to anything which would ever make me question my husband. One thing alot of wives do is read somethign they consider disturbing and then start thinking that this will happen to their guy ...plants seeds of questioning, even when there is maybe nothing to worry about.

You have to know to some extent how your wife processes info....if you don't think she can handle it....well maybe she can't. Opening one's mind up to experinces which are completely outside of your life experince takes very special people.

stlmichelle
01-05-2007, 03:16 PM
A while back my wife found this site and a picture I posted, and she was very upset with me. She still thinks that I come to this site to look at pictures cause it turns me on. While this is not true, she was upset cause I was not honest about it, I violated her trust, and I do not blame her. I have invited her to join this site, but she declined and I don't really push the issue. She knows that I come to this site frequently, and she understands my need to connect with other like minded people, just unfortunately, I voilated her trust, and it kinda jaded her against this site.

Sierra Evon
01-05-2007, 04:15 PM
I dont have an SO :( , but if I did I'd pobably keep it to my self if I knew she'd dissaprove in anyway , A girl s gotta have some thing for herself....:2c:

Gretchen
01-05-2007, 04:28 PM
At this point in my life, my crossdressing is a very personal and private activity that I truly enjoy on my own. I am also thankful that I found this website a couple of years ago because I have learned to accept my crossdressing as an inherent and acceptable part of me, but something I can only share with you ladies on this forum and my higher power. If my wife were to find this site on my computer and "connect the dots", the results for both of us would be devastating.
Gretchen

Roberta Lynn
01-05-2007, 05:23 PM
Soon after I found this site I told my wife about it. I've been a Cross-dresser for over 50 years and my wife has know about me since before we were married. She always accepted and never discouraged my CDing but it was sorta like the crazy aunt nobody talks about.

Reading the threads and post here have opened up avenues of discussion that we never utilized before. We've had more heart to heart talks about CDing in that last 6 months than in the previous 40+ years.

Finding people that we can relate to has helped me understand myself more and has eased some of the doubts, I know, that have always been in the back of her mind.

Of course there are opinions we don't agree with and life style choices that are not for us. But it's the diversity here that make this site informative and educational.

Sorry for the long answer to a short question.
Short answer, yes I told my wife and it's had a positive effect on our lives.

:love: Roberta

ElleCD
01-05-2007, 08:03 PM
My SO noticed this forum address on the PC and also a corset site. She asked if I had visited these sites in a none too friendly way. I said "no" and just denied any knowledge. If she knew about my cding I would have no problem with her seeing this site. Its the knowing about the cding and her likely reaction that is the problem.

Angie G
01-05-2007, 08:32 PM
My wif knows I come here she has never been here but has asked what I talk about And I have invited her in but it has not happened yet :hugs:
Angie

Jodi Lynn
01-06-2007, 08:41 PM
Even though my wife knows that I dress, I know she wouldn't understand me coming to this group. She would think we are all sick in the head.

Rachel Morley
01-06-2007, 08:46 PM
Opening one's mind up to experiences which are completely outside of your life experience takes very special people.
You the woman! :D

Trinni
01-06-2007, 09:18 PM
I don't think the site would bother her but she would be upset knowing I am opening up about this to someone other than her.

danam
01-06-2007, 10:11 PM
I don't think the site would bother her but she would be upset knowing I am opening up about this to someone other than her.

EXACTLY!!! That is exactly my thoughts, as well.

Hugs!
Dana

Amy Hepker
01-06-2007, 10:30 PM
I have told my Lady about it and she even reads with me. She is finding out a lot about us.

marie354
01-06-2007, 10:54 PM
My SO reads with me sometimes, looking over my shoulder, so to speak. She loves the picture gallery. I put a link on her desktop, but she hasn't tried it for herself yet. I told her that are a lot of other women on here that have a guy like me. She shruggs her shoulders and says maybe later on I will. That's OK with me. she can keep peeking over my shoulder when she wants. We don't hide anything from each other. Now I havn't mentioned this site to my brothers and other friends though.
:hugs:

suchacutie
01-07-2007, 12:17 AM
I tell my wife items that I read here and any of you who have read my posts know that I can't say enough in praise of my wife for the support she's shown me. Sooo, why would I want to hide any of it from her?

She's Tina's terrific girlfriend, and that's what's wonderful about being open to your spouse and about having a supportive spouse. There are a few posts here that she would, I'm sure, consider a bit over the top as far as our relationship is concerned, but she's very perceptive and would realize that this forum attracts a wide spectrum of people. I don't know if she's been here, but I surely haven't tried to hide it!

tina