The Next Steps

[Marissa Mae]

Greetings ladies!!! :hugs:

Things have been great for me in regards to dressing and my girlfriend. Halloween was a dream come true, and I surely thought that she would be completely open after that. But thinking in to it more, I think Halloween may have sort of hindered my total "coming out" because she saw me dressed as a French Maid, and not as an actual woman. So, since Halloween, the only dressing has been done in the privacy of my room :(

Now, my girl is great. She is so open minded, and has even admitted of being partially bi-sexual. This in itself tells me that she is quite open minded. We have both talked openly about our "fantasies", and she knows that i yearn to travel out en femme once again, this time in normal, feminine clothing, and not a gaudy Halloween costume. But I think that she is timid due to the first impression.

But last night she told me that if we were to ever go out with me dressed up, she knew of a place to go :happy: I was shocked that she was the one proclaiming this!!! So maybe I just have to take it slow, have more heart to hearts with her, and help her more understand what this is all about. I have even suggested she come here and read up :heehee:

I think the first thing I want to do is show her how I would dress, but she is still afraid to even look at the clothing. How should we go about getting her warmed to the idea? I am not forcing the issue at all as I don't want to suffocate her in this matter. What do you all think I should do? I think it is time for both of us to take the next steps. Or maybe not, I don't know. Help! :eek:

Callie

[carla smith]

Just a suggestion.....

I would start by asking her what she would want me to wear to the place that she wants to take you.

Have fun out there!

But fun doesn't just happen. You have to make it a priority in your life or it'll go missing. Life's too short to not have it.

[Megan_Girl]

I would do just what your doing.

Take it slow and talk... Allot!!

I jealous of you and your relationship with your SO.
XXX
Megan

[Marissa Mae]

I will definately talk to her more and get her used to it, but I really just want to have a session with her and show her bit by bit what this is all about. What do I start with? having her watch me get dressed? Telling her I am dressed and then appear for her? have her dress me?!! ha

And what should I wear to ease her in? Panties? boots? bra?

[nancy58]

I think the others have already given you lots of good advice. Talk to her. Seek her opinion on how you ought to dress when going on this outing. Besides giving you fashion tips most of us sorely need, dressing as she thinks you ought to dress should make her more comfortable with the idea. And there's your in to showing her how you look. Certainly she's going to want to see you dressed before the time comes to go out. And you may need makeup to look more natural that you don't have at home.

Be prepared for cold feet. If she's never seen you dressed, she may get them, and you may get them as well.

Cheers,
Nancy

[Lori SC]

One idea for you:

Before my wife saw me dressed the first time, she looked at pictures of me. Pictures are a stepping stone, they aren't "real life", just small images - sort of like television fantasy.

I agree with you about the clothes. If she can't even look at your clothes, she's not ready to see you dressed.

Keep on talking about it. Her curiosity will get her to look in the end.

Don't forget, you don't have to go out the first time you dress for her. Another step, is for you to have lunch or dinner at home with you en-femme. (Again a stepping stone, and what I did).

Just give her some time to adjust to her comfort zone. You'll be out shopping together in no time. (Another stepping stone if you haven't already done so - shopping together for womens clothes, but you're en-homme).

Hugs, Lori :bighug:

[susie evans]

i would kind of let her leed the way and see where it goes from there :heehee: :heehee:

[Ellisia_Lynch]

My wife is warming up to my dressing too, and I don't know if all women feel the same but she insists I don't get dressed and just appear or that she comes home to me dressed up. She wants me to get dressed in front of her.

I guess that's the best way forward for you - when she is finally able to look at the clothes, show her an outfit & see if you can progress to putting one on infront of her. Maybe you don't even need to go this quickly - we started by painting each other's toe nails, and it was quite some time between that and full dressing.

Another thing that might help: for years I wondered (and researched) what would be the best way to go - dress as best I can to look as good and as passable as possible so I don't look ridiculous, or tone it down so she can obviously see that I am still a guy? It turns out she can handle it so much more when she can still see the male me, so that's what I do. Slowly she will hopefully get used to seeing me in feminine attire and I can gradually add the extra touches.

Good luck!

Ellisia

[bgirl]

Please pardon me, I seem to be in a stange mood today , but what is partialy bi-sexual mean? Maybe you could tell her that your partialy trans-gender. Gender challenged? Challeging gender?

[Marissa Mae]

I am liking the ideas here about showing her pictures, then showing her me in a few things, and then dressing in a few items but not fully en-femme so she can still see me in male clothing :o I think she would appreciate that better rather than blindsiding her with me in high heels and skirt on day!

Instead of "partially" bi-sexual, I think maybe I should rather have just said "uncertain" or "still questioning" her sexuality, but I think she merely fantasizes about being taken by another woman :devil: