why?

[mysteryUser]

This has more then likely been said before but..

why are some people (normally the ones who see CDs in a bad light) can see 1 or more guys out dressed for nothing other then a joke be ok and not a problem, and a person who will do it normally (trying to pass or not) so strange and or wrong.

i.e. the guy who takes more effort is some how different from the one who made the effort (or not much) but for fun.

(i.e. i have been with people out and about when they have seen from 1-5 people out dressed, who looked like they were doing it for a laugh, and they get little comments. when with the same people see someone dressed either trying to pass or not, but not look bad in what they have on have bad comments made about them.)

Its a strange world we live in.

[Joy Carter]

It's amazing how much hate some have for us, when we try the hardest to present ourselves as a proper woman.

[Sweet Jane]

Hi

I have no idea, but honestly I have seen so few CDs out that I haven't been able to guage how people react to them.
However I am too self conscious (and maybe my ego is too fragile!!!), to open myself to this kind of abuse. I'm staying home for now.

[Kate Simmons]

The difference is that those guys are doing it as a joke and have no investment in it. We are expressing a part of ourself that is very near and dear to us, so we take it to heart and can be more hurt by that.:happy:

[Marla S]

Well, I am not sure if I got your post right, so forgive me if I write more BS than usual.

It always becomes tricky if something strange becomes real. People react with vague fear if they can't sort it in. A vague fear usally causes menacing gestures or aggressions (we are animals finally).

A "joke" is no threat because it is unreal.

[mysteryUser]

i have been in and around a number of partys, bars, where on different days, (in the same sort of place) the two different type of CD will show up.

now the former will get a lot of laughts, and light hearted convo. in and around the room and them. now bring in someone who wants to take it more serious, and its mostly negitive, and bad comments. of course there is always exception to the rule.

Edit

True, i think it plays on peoples fears, like they cant figure us out. they prob. see that for a laugh or a joke they would do the same, but to actually take an interest and like it is a whole other thing.

my experience is limited to it. perhapses over 3 or 4 different times. (twice the fun kind, and once or twice the more serious kind). as well as how people react to things thy see on TV.

[CarmenG]

They do not understand, are ignorant, lack education, afraid, insecure, unable to change. Take your pick. I am sure there are other words I could of used, but then the list would be endless......
Best bet, be your own person......:hugs:

[Kate Simmons]

Good advice Carmen. Be yourself, enjoy yourself and have fun. Don't let others gauge your happiness for you.:happy:

[mysteryUser]

not that id let it stand in my way once im ready. i just though of it as an intresting point. how depending on the reason for dressing the mood of the person can change.

[Marla S]

my experience is limited to it. perhapses over 3 or 4 different times. (twice the fun kind, and once or twice the more serious kind). as well as how people react to things thy see on TV.

A similar phenomenon you have with female impersonators.
A lot of GMs and GGs go to the shows and enjoy it (it's not real, it's a show).
Watch the same people when they realize their hubby, brother, father, son outs as CD. The laughters fall silent immediately and are replaced with fear, reproaches, lack of understanding, etc.

[kerrianna]

not that id let it stand in my way once im ready. i just though of it as an intresting point. how depending on the reason for dressing the mood of the person can change.

That's true of anything people find frightening (for whatever reasons they do - ignorance being top of the list). If you're doing it in a light hearted way they can always take the out "oh, it's just a lark"

If you're serious then you force them to confront their own perceptions. Most people don't like to be forced to look at themselves, at least not on terms other than their own. I also find that generally people, in my culture anyway, tend to shrink from serious people or subjects. "lighten up" "don't worry, be happy" "chill" etc....ie don't spoil our party. Don't rock the boat by daring us to think outside the box.

Pretty shallow dish we're swimming in. We're bound to stand out.

[mysteryUser]

I also find that generally people, in my culture anyway, tend to shrink from serious people or subjects. "lighten up" "don't worry, be happy" "chill" etc....ie don't spoil our party. Don't rock the boat by daring us to think outside the box.

This part is at least true of my mums other 1/2 so much so he wont talk to me much, where as at times i often have a joke and a laugh and am very laid back. i will also talk about things, and question them, (discuss things) he (in his family) is use to his and their word being gold. Which i have never been able to take, and he'll never explain him self as he wont like being wrong. (my mum as brought me up to be open minded have my own views, but looking into his upbringing i can see where some of these views come from). and its not a generation thing as hes from the same generation as me.

so i guess this is just another form of Ah, CDers, panic, fight back, i don't like this.

Some people take things as read, and they say it is so it must be. Others discuss, try and work out and (try to) understand.

[JulieCDorlando]

Hello,
In only my own opinion I believe laughter can defuses what MIGHT be a precarious situation to anyone that is TG. In other words guys that dress up for the fun of it, want to get a few laughs from others.Nothing more than as a joke. A CD/TG takes crossdressing to a higher level than the ocassional comic than dresses for the fun. In other words, A CD/TG could confuse a straight guy or girl, where by they look at themselves as being dupped by a 'guy in a dress" and will retalliate with violence, giving their very narrow view on sexual orientation, crossdressing and/or transgender issues. :2c: