if ?

[Iniquity Blonde GG]

i just wondered what you would do if someone you knew pretty well, friend /family member came to you, and said that they suspected you wore womans clothes , would you tell them honestly that you do ? :rolleyes: or would you be so embarrassed and avoid the question ? i suppose it depends on trust and how much you value that person !

[Wendy me]

just to kinda stun them i would say no i don't ... there not womans clothes if you buy them for your self ... thy are your's....

[heathr1]

Good question.

I would tell.

Mother asked me when I was about 16 after she found a denim miniskirt in my room, but I denied it was mine saying it was a friend's.

She was sympathetic when she asked and promised to tell nobody and it was obvious I was lying.

She never mentioned it again and I'm nearly 40 now.

I regret not telling her.

I've never fully dress and only wear lipstick and/or a skirt maybe once a month, or less often for several minutes.

I have no problem in telling girlfriends/partners about this.

[Brenda Love]

totally avoid the question,no doubt about it!:o

Hugs
Brenda

[Paula G]

It would really depend on how well I knew the person and what their level of acceptance would be.

[Iniquity Blonde GG]

good answer wendy !! :thumbsup:

[tvbeckytv]

it only hapened to me as a youngster at home. I didnt really acknowledge it when asked, not so much because of shame though, just because i was, and am, a very private person.
I never talked to the family about it, other than being told off for having 'borrowed' something of mums.
They knew, i knew they knew, they knew i knew they knew...and that was good enough fo me

[Jocee]

Been there and done that...... and yes.... I told..... with no repercussions at all..... it's just "my little thing"


:)

[Trinni]

The las part of your question was exactly my answer. It all depends on how close they are to me and How much I can trust there confidence. Some of my friends I consider brothers and sisters, but only some of them know how to keep their mouth shut. It would have to be on a case by case basis.

[Iniquity Blonde GG]

when people are put in a corner/caught out, its like a rabbit caught in headlights, you panice, and not sure what to say/do. everybody reactions are differant :o

[sammantha_flowers]

It would depend on how sure I was that they knew anything and the tone of there voice.. if they said it in the tone of voice as in "did you sodimize my mother?" or "isn't that fun and kinky" but everyone has to weigh the consequences and there will be some, lets not be naive. Some will be accepting and others will turn their backs.. and you will never know which is which until afterwards.

[BeckyAnderson]

I'm at a point in my life where it no longer matters what other people think of me. If it were only up to me I would tell anyone who asked. However, there is more to this than meets the eye. My wife knows I crossdress and I dress at home when she's around but she would be absolutely devastated if anyone found out. So, if anyone we knew asked if I crossdressed, I would dodge the issue. After 52 years of dodging and hiding one gets pretty good at it :devil:

Hugs,
Becky

[Joy Carter]

I'd ask them what they know and who told them. Chances are someone with a motive has been talking.:p

[Katiegirl]

I was caught by my ex wife 20+ years ago, so I could not deny I wore women's cloths, she proceeded to tell the rest of the family and our then friends and I didn't deny it to them either.
I don't know if my kids know as they were young when my marriage broke up ( My Ex says she never told them) but if they asked me now I would not deny it since I intend to "out" myself to them in the coming year. I would not deny it if anyone else asks, it would be a relief in a way even if it broke friendships. I'm not living with any one so I don't have a problem in that respect.

Katie

[Stephanie Scott]

As with many things, "it depends." Depends on who's askin, depends on how they're askin, depends on when they're asking, and it depends on where they're askin.

In some ways, it would be a relief to be able to tell certain people about whom I'm fairly confident they would be fine. But I don'tplan on volunteering unless I see a clear cut opening that includes the recipient of the information being ok w/it.

E.g., If a good friend just starting discussing CDing in general and expressed a nonjudgmental positive view, I would likely tell them.

[Daintre]

You have to be sure before answering that you know that you can trust this person whole heartedly. If it were just a person of interest asking you do not know what their ulterior motive will be. I was asked by a "friend" if I dressed, I told him and my volunteer work with the Scout movement was over. I am very careful who I tell

[Marla S]

Well I guess my neighbours and the postman already know or at least think there is something strange going on.
If they would ask, I'd most likely tell them.
A question about some details, i. e. nailpolish, makeup I answer focused on this detail and not with the whole story (wouldn't make much sense).
It would depend a bit on the situtation though.
If I am depending on the person I might hasitate. I dress down (sadly) meeting such people.

[Lisa Golightly]

I've always been honest. I never saw any point in lying.

[Kristi1948]

I don't advertise it. But if asked directly I would have to say yes as I am not prepared to lie about it either. :D

[Kate Simmons]

I would say:"Why do you ask?" and go from there. Many of my family members know already however.:happy:

[Amanda Jane]

if you are open and out you never have to worry about the "do you" question, nor do you have to suspect anyone's motives - however a lot of people might ask 'why' but that's a different kettle of fish

there is more than enough fear, paranoia, and worry in the world, why add to it

besides, i'm a lazy as the day is long / if you tell the truth you never have to bother to think about what you told that person

[Iniquity Blonde GG]

i just find it a pity that as soon as you confide in people they are soon to quick to judge, and "some " are just plain nosey !!

[Lisa Golightly]

Quick to judge and plain nosey are the cornerstones of 99% of the human race... :)

[Tracy Lynn]

About a year ago I would have avoided the question. Now I am in a frame of mind to just tell the truth. Honestly it would probably be a little relieving to be open and honest to my family and closest friends.

[Lady Jayne]

After numerouse Fancy dress nights out with a drag theme, it has been suggested that I enjoy it a bit too much. If anyone comments that I like wearing womens cloths or something similar I always say "Yes but only on weekends!" :D

[BOOTLOVINGGIRL]

I've been in this situation twice. First time was a male friend who mentioned it out of the blue and could only have found out about it from one other source. I acted surprised and didn't answer the question but I'm sure he had been told about my CDing. That was years ago and I see him all the time and we're friends and it has never come up again. I have a feeling he had a brother who was into some CDing but never heard the whole story and never asked. The 2nd time was a much more indirect query from a female who was employed by my friends. She had mentioned CDing to my friend(who does know about me) and I think she'd noticed the stash in my closet. I ignored her inquery because she said it in front of someone else and I didn't fully trust her. Didn't come up again. This was also years ago. Not sure how I'd react today. Might blow them off, might tell them all depending on situation.

[Iniquity Blonde GG]

its said "honesty is the best policy" , but sometimes its not always the case :(

[Raychel]

I like Wendy's answer. I only wear my clothes. :heehee: :heehee:

[pantyhose_clare]

I remember when i was 14 ish and had been trying on mascara. Went out for the day and it started to pour down. My friend said to me "you look like you have a black eye". I didn't really think about it at the time but when I got home I had a look in the mirror and realised I hadn't taken the mascara off.

If I had been out with a girl instead of a guy I'm sure I would have been busted.

[Iniquity Blonde GG]

lol you would have with th mascara :D i dont wear make up, ( never have ) but when GG friends have had it on and either been hot, or out in rain it has ran and ive told em they look like a panda lol

[Brenda Love]

When I read the posts from CDs who's wives have divorced them because of their dressing it makes my want to stay in the closet forever! I would not want to lose my wife nor the respect of my family and friends.:(

Hugs
Brenda

[suchacutie]

Anyone who has the arrogance (or simply stupidity) to ask such a question is one of those people who attempts to control everyone and everything. I know immediately what my response would be and it would be to bring this infantile need for control out into the open. I would turn it back on him/her and then suggest that there is no answer that question that anyone would believe.

But no doubt that I would ride this person hard...I cannot stand to be manipulated like that.

tina

[Bev06 GG]

Well If I may I can answer this on behalf of my partner. I know that if it was a family member my partner would tell them. He's already indicated that he'd like to tell his 20 year old daughter if the occassion ever arose. I dont think he'd just come out and tell her, but if she asked I dont think he could lie to her, and I think there would be a sense of relief too.
Bev

[Joyciecd]

This actually happened to me. Once at a business meeting when I was in my 1% en drab mode, a guy took me aside and posed the question. I asked him why he asked. He said he felt an attraction to me, but as a femm. I revealed that I dress, and he asked me for a date, if I would come en femme. I did, and I still date him 3 or 4 times a month.

[Diannna]

Very good question. A family member, maybe! A close friend, probably not. Still in this day and age, we are not accepted, and that is a very sad thing for us, especially when you think about it, gay's are almost readily accepted. If I were gay I believe I could just go about my business and most all would be fine. My brother was gay (now past on ) and my sister is a les. Neither had or has any problems so to speak, and yes they know about me and agree I'm a complete different problem. Just my 2 cents worth.

[Rachaelb64]

Interesting question.

Five years ago I would definitely would of avoided it let the plague!

Today however, there is high probability that I would not deny the fact that I was a crossdresser.

Mind you, my problem would be, would they beleive me? You see I am a bit of a wind up merchant with a near prefect poker face. Even my best mate who has known me for over 25years cant tell sometimes :D

[Andrea_girl]

It would be a trust thing.

If it was a woman who asked I would say yes if I trusted her.

If it was a Man I would probably say no and avoid the issue

[Iniquity Blonde GG]

no-one should be ashamed of who they are !! no matter what you do. ( within certain reasons of course ) ! but the world is full of so many predujuces, we try and bring up our children to understand about everyday life, but it seems that even when we do that we are wrong :sad:

[Penny]

Yes! All of my family knows. My children know and have seen me dressed. Mind you, it is not something that I run out and tell the world but it is, to me, not a secret since there are very few places I don't go dressed however I want, including all the stores close to home.
I refuse to allow other to dictate how I want to look just by what I think they might think. When you think about it, doesn't it sound really wrong to allow other to dictated how you live your life.
If I am dressed and need to go to the store, I go to the store. If people don't like the way I look, they don't have to look. Should someone figure me out with a gauck or stare or snicker, you can not believe how a dissapproving look with daggars in your eyes can be. In reality, I find most people too sheepish to continue.

:hugs:

Penny

[Tina Dixon]

They would probley find out real soon becouse I'm sure i would be starting to sweat:o

[vicky lee]

like wendy me answer
i would say yes guilty i wear the clothes that i feel are right for me

[pedebra]

It would depend almost entirely who was doing the asking. There are quite a few people that I would have no problem admitting that I dress; there are others that in no way would I admit it.

[Franki Kate]

The subject was brought up with the wife of one of my best friends, about 6 years ago. I had gone to a Holloween party dressed to the nines. My wife and I had spent the better part of two weeks gatheing the clothing for the event. Well, some of the neighbors at the gathering had cameras and I was asked to pose.

The wife of the dear friend had a chance to view the photos taken and the question was later asked of me. I admitted the truth without hesitation, asking her not to mention our talk with her husband. Over the years she was kind enough to help me buy cetain clothing. She recently passed away from cancer, after a heroic two year battle. I sure miss the talks. About two weeks before she passed, she called and asked if I would come for a brief visit, I idd. Her husband had gone to the store and she had a package for me; four skirts that she knew I admired. What a friend.

The other person has been a sister-in-law. She has done house keeping for us from time to time. I told her, because I did not want to have her accidently find things I might have left laying around, by mistake. She has even done some sewing for me, on a three piece suit jacket, by extending the sleves.

The sister-in-law has even tried to find a dress in my size that would match one she has, that I really admire. What a gal. She has never seen me dressed, nor do I have any such plans for such an event. The friends wife had seen me more that once fully dressed.

[Iniquity Blonde GG]

thank you all for your input :love: makes intresting reading !!

[Naomi]

well Angie, i want to come out of the closet so to speak. So if someone confronted me with suspicions of my cross dressing i would happily admit to it.

[Angie G]

2 years ago I got my wife to let me wear one of her skirt it was hot out and most of our time that weekend was outside just after that I was wearing some of her blouses thats she asked about it and I told her everything and I got to take my thing out of hidding :hugs:
Angie

[Sweet Cindy]

My answer hinges on the most important person - my wife.

If she came and directly asked me, I'd tell her everything. In fact, that's what I'm hoping for. A bit of a coward's way out, I know. I came close to telling her once, then got the deer-in-the-headlights sensation and dropped it. This is old news for anyone who's read my first post. I've worn her shoes, she's painted my toenails, even offered to mascara my eyelashes but then said "but that's it, I don't want a crossdresser for a husband". I'm sure she has her suspicions and I'm leaving it at that for now. When the right time comes, I plan to tell her. If she asks me before then, I'll tell her.

As for telling others if they ask, it would be dependant on what my wife and I have decided regarding the limitations on my dressing. If she doesn't want anyone else to know, I'll deny that I dress to anyone who asks. If she's ok with certain people knowing (my closest friends, for instance) I would love to tell them. The only shame I feel regarding crossdressing is that I hide it from my wife.

Cindy

[Emily Ann Brown]

Let's see.......wife is divorcing me over my gender issue, grown kids all know now and still love me, several friends and my EX secretary know......yes, if confronted I would tell. What have I got to lose?


Emily Ann

[Stephenie S]

The questions I get are "WHY do you wear women's clothes", "WHY do you want to be a girl", and "Are you gay?".

No one yet has asked me if I do wear women's clothes. I guess this means they all know already.

I like the answer, "They aren't women's clothes, they are mine. I have the receit".

Steph

[EricaCD]

At this point in my life, in most instances I would be inclined to give a truthful response if asked directly. Based on the way you phrased the question I would proceed on the assumption that the person was probably pretty damned sure anyway. In that case what's the point in poisoning a friendship with a pointless lie...

If the opportunity presented itself to delay giving an answer (for example, if asked in an E-mail) I would ask Helene for her opinion as to how I should respond. At present, this is not "my" secret; it's ours. As I was the one who forced her to share it, it seems quite unfair not to give her an equal say in deciding how to reveal it.

Erica

[Jenny Beth]

Good question, I think I'd fire back with a few questions of my own like, "What makes you think I wear women's clothes"? and "Would it make a difference to our friendship if I did"? Whether or not I came clean would depend on their answers.

[vicky lee]

nice answer wendy me
i would say yes of course i do i wear what i feel good in