It's Your Little Secret But...............

[Vicky_Scot]

Once you tell someone your secret it is not a secret anymore.

Apologies for sounding negative but I feel I must put over my point as I have experienced this first hand.

[Lisa Golightly]

I don't like secrets.

[Jodie_Lynn]

There is an old adage:

"Two men can keep a secret. If one of them is dead"


Now, my question: the point you are trying to make is.......?

[Kieron Andrew]

Now, my question: the point you are trying to make is.......?i was wondering this?

[Teresa Amina]

Trust is always risky. I'm out to two people, one new and local. We'll see what happens. But even coming in here and relaxing we drop enough hints to identify us to malevolent lurkers. Life is dangerous, but taking a chance sometimes is well worth it.

[Vicky_Scot]

Sorry if my post was unclear, the point I was trying to make was that once you tell someone your secret that you crossdress it is no longer your secret as it now belongs to the person you told and may do with it what they wish.

[Jodie_Lynn]

True enough, but that applies to any aspect of our personal lives that we care to share with others.

How many times have you mentioned to a co-worker "Hey, I'm going on a job interview today, but don't mention it to anyone."

When we interact with others, there is a certain amount of vulnerability we are exposing.

CD-ing is just a little more exposing than other things.

The point being: be careful who you entrust your secrets with.
;)

[Trinni]

I kind of figured that was something that was common knowledge. I'm kind of guessing you told someone you trusted about something, maybe CDing or mayber not, and they betrayed you and the word spead.

[Karren H]

Well the corollary to that would be if you tell your secret to someone it becomes their burden as well as yours!! Case in point... Telling your wife or SO.... They won't necessiralry do whith it what they want but the weight of your secret can be a detriment and a burden to them more so than to you!!

If you must tell someone its better that they have a vested interested in not spreading your secret!! Kind of a mutually assured destruction thing!! Lol. Wifes and SO's... Other crossdressers.... Anyone that would be embarased by your disclosure!!! If you tell someone that has nothing to loose and maybe something to gain... Then your screwed!!! Royally!!

So tell us, whom did you tell and what happened?? We won't tell anyone.....else!!! Hehehe

Karren

[Amanda Jane]

that saying tends to be attributed to Ben Franklin, but i know for a fact the hells angels use it too, but they use the franklin math which is three can keep a secret if two are dead, and i'm pretty sure they mean it

i'm with lisa and i hate secrets, if only because i know they will out

you offer no details, but if you give a secret to a wife do you expect her to keep it from her husband /

and that secrets are not kept, is pretty well known, as the below quotes would indicate

The man who can keep a secret may be wise, but he is not half as wise as the man with no secrets to keep”
Edgar Watson Howe

“When a secret is revealed, it is the fault of the man who confided it”
French Proverb

“If you reveal your secrets to the wind you should not blame the wind for revealing them to the trees.”
Kahlil Gibran quotes

the best part about not haveing secrets, is that you are free, secrets are a kind of bondage and when you tell them to others it is putting the same bondage on them, that does not sound right to me

[Kate Simmons]

One of my boyhood super heroes(Green Lantern) said this once in a story when someone asked him who he was in his other identity:"If I told you, it would be our secret and a secret known to two is no longer a secret." What kind of impression did that make on a 13 year old? A big one I guess, since I still remember it. That being the case, my Ericka self is no longer a secret but it's because I wanted it that way really.;) :battingeyelashes:

[Kenix]

A novel once said secret is information you use to trade for other secrets.

[Natasha_82]

Thats true but if that other person keeps it a secret then it's still a secret but not among you 2

[Tina Dixon]

I would say no.

[MJ]

Well the corollary to that would be if you tell your secret to someone it becomes their burden as well as yours!! Case in point... Telling your wife or SO.... They won't necessiralry do whith it what they want but the weight of your secret can be a detriment and a burden to them more so than to you!!
If you must tell someone its better that they have a vested interested in not spreading your secret!! Kind of a mutually assured destruction thing!! Lol. Wifes and SO's... Other crossdressers.... Anyone that would be embarased by your disclosure!!! If you tell someone that has nothing to loose and maybe something to gain... Then your screwed!!! Royally!!

So tell us, whom did you tell and what happened?? We won't tell anyone.....else!!! Hehehe

Karren

Karren is right, i have a friend who told there so and she said your burdon is now mine , and i now have to live a lie ..
the best thing to do is tell no one

[Amanda Jane]

most respectfully i have to disagree, tell everyone, then no secret, no shame, no fear, no worry = longer life, more free, more fun

[Barb Valentine]

most respectfully i have to disagree, tell everyone, then no secret, no shame, no fear, no worry = longer life, more free, more fun

Easier said then done

[Amanda Jane]

easier to do where you can manage the outcome - even if its damage control - than face it when you don't and can't control it / no lie stays hidden forever / nothing can be put in a place where none can find it / the truth will out

given that, might as well come clean

the earlier you do that, the better your life (and those around you) will be for it

[Brianna Lovely]

I know that I may seem a little forward, around here, but I try my best to be honest at all times. If someone asks me, I tell them the truth.

Last week I got my nails done and was sitting outside the salon for a few minutes. A hair-stylist sat down next to me, complimented me on my nails (I was in drab), then asked me why I kept them like that. I told her that I'm a transgender person and I like to dress-up now and then. She thought it was wonderful, that I could be so open and comfortable with myself.

Secrets? No, but a wish for larger breasts, yes, giggle.

[Joy Carter]

most respectfully i have to disagree, tell everyone, then no secret, no shame, no fear, no worry = longer life, more free, more fun

Oh I don't know about that. I can tell you about being outed and having to retire from a much valued career because of four years of harassment. When I came here I was a wreck about myself. And how low my life had gone because someone found out. My family now knows and what fun am I having with them knowing ? I'd much rather have told them than to have a lier embellish one small detail into a novel. You just don't know just how mean and vicious someone can be until it happens to you. Sorry to you gurls who know about me, but the newbee's have to know what they are getting them selves into.

[Tracy_Victoria]

Once you tell someone your secret it is not a secret anymore.

Apologies for sounding negative but I feel I must put over my point as I have experienced this first hand.

Very much the case! sounds like you have been hurt too! sadly we don't live in a world of kittens and mittens, and sometimes things are better to keep a secret, though lying also is not a good thing either.

I presume you have told someone about your crossdressing and the reaction was not a good one. Sadly this happens and now the only think you can do is repair as much as you can, but sadly sometimes, there is no repair available.

Good luck with what ever it is you have troubles with.