breaking the ice

[satin-and-lace-for-m]

Hi,

My wife of 27 years founf my "stash" about 7 years ago....been thru hell since, almost got divorced twice over my crossdressing. She's never seen me dressed, only know that I do it on business trips.

I've never talked to hew about my cd'ing, and she's never asked. All these years I tried to tell her but could not.


I don't/can't pass, never been outside.

Thinkg have improved over the last 2 months, we been seeing a marriage counselor. We are going away for a long weekend to celebrate our 27th anniversary. It's 4 hours car drive each way. I'd really like to talk to her about my cd'ing....and ideas on how to ease into the conversation?

Cheers,

Satin...

[Stephenie S]

My advice? If you are seeing a counselor, talk about your CDing there. Don't MENTION it on your trip. Not even one little bit! Just give your wife the best time you can. Try and remind her of why she married you in the first place. Vacation trips are for pleasure, not for bringing up family problems. She (and you) will only be sorry if you use this trip to try and talk about your CDing.

Lovies,
Stephenie

[Trinni]

I have to agree with Stephanie, If you chose the wrong time it could just make it worse if she doesn't agree.

[EricaCD]

Agree with the others. A vacation trip together is not the place to bring up a subject that is plainly (at this point) an unpleasant one for her.

Counseling sessions are an ideal place to make it clear that you are ready to discuss whatever she wants to discuss, whenever (i.e., not just in the session).

Your best bet, however much YOU want to clear the air, is to follow HER lead.

Good luck!
Erica

[satin-and-lace-for-m]

Wow, thanks for thew quick replies. All your advice seems sound, I will not mention it during the trip.

Cheers,

Satin...

[Sandra]

I wouldn't say anything on your vaction unless you want to ruin it, wait till you get home a to try to explain things to her. If you wait until you next see the councillor together she may not like it you bringing it up without already talking to her before hand.

Hope you can work it out. :)

[Sheila]

My advice? If you are seeing a counselor, talk about your CDing there. Don't MENTION it on your trip. Not even one little bit! Just give your wife the best time you can. Try and remind her of why she married you in the first place. Vacation trips are for pleasure, not for bringing up family problems. She (and you) will only be sorry if you use this trip to try and talk about your CDing.

Lovies,
Stephenie

:iagree: Enjoy your vacation lots of TLC 27 years is a long time Celebrate it well

Jess

[Iniquity Blonde GG]

enjoy your trip first hun, as everyone has said you could get all the way there, then bring it up, and cause such a atmosphere, and things could get even worse. at least with the counsellar theres some "neutral" there, who isnt taking sides, so thats probaly the best way for it to be approached :hugs: in the mean time enjoy your anniversary :hugs: relax and celebrate what you have :love:

[Amanda Jane]

why do people always want to do this before a vacation or at christmas

[Karren H]

Definately don't bring it up on the trip out!! Could be a terrible vacation!! Maybe on the way back.. Closer to home!! Maybe real close to home!! Lol.

My wife doesn't like to talk about it either... Doubt she will ever.. She even repremanded me last night for putting on chapstick in public last night!! "You put it on like a woman does lipstick"!! Dahhhh!!! Hehehe. But I can live with that!! And I find a way to dress when I have time!! Sooo good luck!!

Karren

[Kate Simmons]

Congratulations on your 27th anniversary and enjoy your trip together Hon.It's a nice time to rekindle the old feelings and romantic either way.:love: :happy: Ericka

[wabnaok]

I recommended you enjoy the weekend to celebrate your anniversary and leave the crossdressing at home. Do not bring up crossdressing unless she does! It is important to let her know how much you care about her and your marriage!

[Brianna123]

I understand it can be hard to tell the person you love about your crossdressing. I have wanted to tell my girlfriend about my dressing for several months now and still haven't found the right time or the courage to do it.