Trying to build a house on a beed of coals

[CharlaineCadence]

Ok now I know how the other people feel when they try to rebuild something that has fallen in to dispair. you see I have taken over the Rhode Island Gender Community in hopes to build it into a better and greater support system for all. One of the thing I have decided to do is to join forces with another group that is trying to do the same thing for our community. [I] posted a list of questions on the board that we have asking what was wanted by the members to see what was needed after very lil response from the members and a series of quetions were posted. The only question that was commented upon was wether or not a support group be moderated for crossdressers. Upon purposing the ideas to help the community and my goal was to help them and now my idea is being railroaded.

All i want to do is to help the transgender community of RI. I am hoping that we can become just as strong as the other advocacy gay and lesbian groups. we dont have the support that we need in our state to properly support the community. Because of the descrimination against the law in RI is neither prosicuted nor confronted. How does one do this without the support of ones members. What should I do?

[AmberTG]

Without support from the members, there's really not much you can do inless you have deep pockets and are willing to take on the job alone. It sucks, but it would seem that your community doesn't really want help or they'd be more active, or at least more interested.

[Siobhan Marie]

Without support from the members, there's really not much you can do inless you have deep pockets and are willing to take on the job alone. It sucks, but it would seem that your community doesn't really want help or they'd be more active, or at least more interested.

Charlene, I would have to agree with Amber on this one.

:hugs: Anna Marie x

[Calliope]

Upon purposing the ideas to help the community and my goal was to help them and now my idea is being railroaded.


Could it be possible the "railroading" isn't simply the process of community participation? Often we (artists, leaders, whatevers) have these great ideas and it's hard to ... simply let go enough for others to get in. (I am thinking of my many frustrated attempts to get commie debating forums going without bursting into flames.) I think if you stay solid, people will eventually come to you for your leadership. (Hmm, I'm so hopeful today.)

Good luck.

[Kate Simmons]

I can relate to that Hon. I tried to get things going in the TG Org I was in. After many failed attempts, I just gave up because of lack of interest. It seems many just want to sit back , be served by others and go with the flow. I simply got tired of kicking a dead horse and spinning my wheels and left to do things on my own. They remain to this day being content being a "sewing circle" that just meets once a month with very little activity or participation. I understand that most don't want to be "outted" but there comes a time in my mind where you better start cooking or get out of the kitchen. You can't, however, make the fire bigger where none exists to begin with and if there is little or no investment, there is little or no return. Those of us who want to make a difference just have to do the best we can.:happy:

[Chrissycd]

Charlaine,
I don't think you can expect instant success. If the organization fell apart, it probably did so b/c of poor leadership, the usual political infighting that always seems to rear its ugly head, and the low public profiles alot of girls tend to have (often for good reason).
I'd just say that you should be consistent on that site, more than anything. Maybe starting a regular update so that people know that it's current and active and even having a few helpful links so that girls who visit it see its usefulness. Also, you might consider checking w/ a web search engine like Google to see how you can improve the site's visibility. If the site doesn't have any good links to the search engines, then nobody will ever even find your site. One other thing would be to consider attending a "Coming Out Day" event or something similar that's tied in w/ the larger GLBT community there. By meeting people in the wider community, you will make connections and probably get advice from them.
Hugs,
Chrissy

[CharlaineCadence]

just to let everyone know i have recently found out why it failed in the first place. It seems that rhode island has a large number of very mean crossdressers who want the spotlight on them at all times and they forced all the transgendered men and women from the site. I find this out from being invited into another group that consists of the people who openly started the group i had taken over. and they have explained everything. it pains me to see that we cannot get along as a single group. but i can understand their complaints

[Wendy me]

that's sad and upsetting , i have seen it every were people in a place were they can do some good for those that look up to them . turn things into a me fest sad things become abought them and only them the group suffers and usually just gives up and has no real interest .

before they totally lose respect they do almost anything to hold on by running the group on fear of not going along with them or as a pity me stand by me thing till there is little or nothing left .. fear miss trust and broken promises and lost agendas leave the group down and broken..


now you come along going to save the group and lead them to a better place , you have a dream a goal and this wonderful plan... after the group has seen from the last group jumping on the band wagon is hard they just fell off one.. you can do what you want they will stand behind you .. but you need to earn their trust ... go slow take small steps tone down some long term goals give them something to show they can achieve in a short term ... build their trust it's a long road to walk ... you all together can do it one step at a time...........