Life after SRS

[Maggie Kay]

I have noticed that most of the TS/TG posters here are pre-op or non-op and I got to wondering if the need to discuss these issues goes away after SRS. I have read that many disappear into stealth and are living the lives they wanted. I guess then that they don't have much in common with the rest here and have other areas of life to focus on. Actually, I hope that this is true because, there must be more to life than constantly dealing with gender issues.

[joanlynn28]

I know that most post ops seem to just dissapear into their new gender roles and I will probable be that way too, but we need to still be active in the TS community because there are always going to be others out there that will need our help and encouragement dealing with their own gender issues. I have a dear friend that helped me out when I was relatively new to the community and still coming out. And all that she asked of me in return that I do the same to the next T-girl that comes along and pass onto her what I have learned and experience. The best phase that comes to mind is that we all need to "Pay It Forward". And we need to remember our past struggles in history so that we can gain acceptance in normal society and keep progessing forward

[natasha]

That is a wonderful way of thinking. I am sure there are many of us that are wondering where we really are or where we are going. To have someone that may be leading the way (so to say) is comforting.

Speaking for myself, I am totally lost at the moment. I know where where I was and always knew that there was something underlying and now that it is coming out the thoughts, feelings, visions, desires are rampant and quite confusing to say the least.

[Sheila]

I know that most post ops seem to just dissapear into their new gender roles and I will probable be that way too, but we need to still be active in the TS community because there are always going to be others out there that will need our help and encouragement dealing with their own gender issues. I have a dear friend that helped me out when I was relatively new to the community and still coming out. And all that she asked of me in return that I do the same to the next T-girl that comes along and pass onto her what I have learned and experience. The best phase that comes to mind is that we all need to "Pay It Forward". And we need to remember our past struggles in history so that we can gain acceptance in normal society and keep progessing forward


:iagree: and I hope that as I travel further down the road with my cdr (where ever it may lead to eventually), I remember these words and remain around to help those still travelling it.

thankyou

Jess

[Marcie Sexton]

I suppose that I am like a Pit Bull, once I get ahold of something I have a hard time letting go. I do now and would continue to work for the right and recognition of all members of our community....Just my nature !

[Siobhan Marie]

I know that most post ops seem to just dissapear into their new gender roles and I will probable be that way too, but we need to still be active in the TS community because there are always going to be others out there that will need our help and encouragement dealing with their own gender issues. I have a dear friend that helped me out when I was relatively new to the community and still coming out. And all that she asked of me in return that I do the same to the next T-girl that comes along and pass onto her what I have learned and experience. The best phase that comes to mind is that we all need to "Pay It Forward". And we need to remember our past struggles in history so that we can gain acceptance in normal society and keep progessing forward

Joanlynn, I so agree with you, we do need to Pay It Foward and help the next T-girl when she comes looking for help. I for one will not be leaving this forum once I've completed my journey. I'll be here, I'm not going anywhere.

:hugs: Anna Marie x

[Calliope]

Actually, I hope that this is true because, there must be more to life than constantly dealing with gender issues.

The way I feel, there's nothing especially taxing or discomfiting about "dealing with gender issues." I will probably always be non-op and I'm fine with that - I sorta take the dialectical approach and champion permanent transition. I've always had an activist side (well, hell, I was a member of the Communist Party) and, being so close to SF, I'm sure I'll have my chance to 'activate' some more.

But to those who go stealth after full SRS or resolving a lot of psychological crap, you know I have to support that move, too.

[JenniferMint]

I see more post-ops on http://beginninglife.com/newforum/ than here.

I haven't had SRS myself, but I did have FFS on January 3 2007, and I've noticed myself visiting TG boards less these days. TG issues are less on my mind these days, and since I'm possibly non-op, I may have had every TG-oriented surgery that I wanted to now. Though I am not done transitioning, maybe I just hit a dry spell recently as far as forum-going.

[Sally2005]

I wonder if it is much like keeping hidden when exploring crossdressing? You don't want other people to know you are doing it then and after a full transition you probably don't want most other people to know about your past. Also, the part I read about getting bored of hearing about it I can understand some. It is like talking to someone you haven't known since high school -- usually a lot has changed and those old stories arn't who you are anymore.

[ToyGirl]

There are many reasons to dissapear after SRS. This site really is not much in the way of support for TS' as its mainly about crossdressing but thats why i like it here. Honestly i have chatted at dedicated TS support sites and i have never met more unhelpfull bitchy depressed lost souls in my life , all desperatly trying to hold onto the community as if it's the only thing they have , some people want to be women others want to be transsexuals.

I see constant bashing of TV/CD/TG on the TS sites and thats part of the reason im here, i'd like the everyone to know not all TS are arrogant and heartless. I also adore clothes and TS sites seem to treat clothes like a sin.

There all like "i wear sensible shoes" well i wear 3 inch platforms , get over it.

Back on point. People use sites for info and possibly support while transitioning and after wards just go back to having a normal life.

[ashlee chiffon]

is that when the cd comes home, he can't wait to put on a bra
when the transgender comes home...she can't wait to take off the bra!

the post op has transitioned...probably more comfortible in sweats and t-shirt for dress in their daily lives...
the cd thrives on the dressing and enjoyment of spending some time in feminine dress...which is the theme in cd forums...and topic of most posts...
just a difference in mindset and interests...we're a Very Mixed Bag!

[AmberTG]

I'm still not sure why some people get so bent about what a person choses to wear, TG, TV, TS, CD, issues aside. I know GGs that wouldnt be cought dead in a dress, and I know GGs my age that don't feel presentable without makeup and nice clothes. Heels are a matter of taste for women, some like em, some don't. I saw a woman at the gas station, 50 something, that was wearing the shoes with the 3 inch chunky heels, some women just like heels. I don't see too many skirts this time of year, but I do see some, on all age groups. There's no rules except what that person is comfortable in. As for fading into the woodwork, you can't blame them, all their life they wanted to be a woman, now they are, and life goes on. There are enough other things to worry about and talk about. I'm just starting transition, but I'd still rather talk about my hobbys than transition issues, my hobbys are more interesting to me than the details of my transition. Having friends that support you in transition is important, but there is more to life than just that. Just my 2 cents.
Amber

[Kieron Andrew]

I see more post-ops on http://beginninglife.com/newforum/ than here.

and on www.nuttycats.com

[Priss]

I come here with the specific purpose of passing on knowledge to others who may be in need. I don't post much as you can see, but I do read and comment now and then when I find something that maybe I can answer. I don't however have all of the answers and no one does.

Sometimes after reading here, I do have to remind myself of this.

[Natasha Anne]

I noticed that I visit less since GRS, but it's not a conscious thing. I think for a part of my life the whole transitioning process overwhelmed me and I jut need to use time to chat to others, even if I was helping them.

Now I'm still keen to help, and have physically met more TS folks in person since GRS than I ever did before GRS.

I guess after GRS things slow a little, your mind calms down and other things regain focus. In my case it is spending more time with my children and getting back into work in a big way. So my time on the Internet is just more limited than it used to be, and I tend to reply to posts where I can help, rather than initiate them.

It's different, but I'm still present, and like everyone here I still work tirelessly to ensure all manners of diversity are respected.

[Chrissycd]

I think that I'll probably continue to live in Minnesota until I have fully transitioned and then I'll probably move away (to somewhere warm!) IF I have it my way, once there I'll start fresh, make new friends, hopefully find a mate, maybe adopt a few kids and get on with life.
I hope that's not impossible. I'm so tired of being alone that I could just about puke.
My family won't miss me, and I have so few friends right now that it's not like I'd be leaving so much behind. Still, I don't know how one can fully leave everything behind. I just finished spending 40 years in a closet. Why do I want to jump into a new one???
Sometimes, I just don't know what to think.

[Rachel_740]

I have noticed that most of the TS/TG posters here are pre-op or non-op and I got to wondering if the need to discuss these issues goes away after SRS. I have read that many disappear into stealth and are living the lives they wanted.

Speaking for myself, I am dissapearing into a stealth real life, but I do still come here and occasionally post where I feel I may have something beneficial to say. Obviously I don't read every post or even thread but if a title attracts me I will have a look, as I did with this one.

Rach
xxx

PS. If anyone does want to ask anything, just PM me and I'll answer as honestly as I can (unless it's too personal).

[Lauren B]

There are many reasons to dissapear after SRS. This site really is not much in the way of support for TS' as its mainly about crossdressing but thats why i like it here. Honestly i have chatted at dedicated TS support sites and i have never met more unhelpfull bitchy depressed lost souls in my life , all desperatly trying to hold onto the community as if it's the only thing they have , some people want to be women others want to be transsexuals.

I see constant bashing of TV/CD/TG on the TS sites and thats part of the reason im here, i'd like the everyone to know not all TS are arrogant and heartless. I also adore clothes and TS sites seem to treat clothes like a sin.

There all like "i wear sensible shoes" well i wear 3 inch platforms , get over it.

Back on point. People use sites for info and possibly support while transitioning and after wards just go back to having a normal life.

To indulge your off-topicness for a little while longer, I also like how the women on this board respect the fact that transition is a unique, personal journey and the end result looks different for everyone. I've been on a few sites where anyone who doesn't get SRS and FFS is somehow "less" than other transsexuals, and I just can't stand that one-size-fits-all mentality. Transsexuals rightfully complain about how they are judged by mainstream society, yet so many turn around and do the same thing to their own. I'm happy I don't see any of that here.

[Shellybean]

You are correct in my eyes. You are only a trans while transitioning, after the transition you are a woman. Life goes on. I am pre op f/t and its already same old same old. Sometimes i pass like a kidney stone, sometimes i get called maam.
I am just me
hugz
michelle

[Colleentg]

I agree, how can you be a TS after op? You're a lady now. I would never want to be labeled post-op after!

[Kristen Kelly]

I suppose that I am like a Pit Bull, once I get ahold of something I have a hard time letting go. I do now and would continue to work for the right and recognition of all members of our community....Just my nature !

Glad to stand shoulder to shoulder with you on the issues, a chorus’ voice travels farther than a solo voice.