Grocery shopping enfemme

[Gizmo, Debbie]

Went grocery shopping "enfemme" and was read and followed and haggled by a group of about 5 girls ( all around 13ish). They followed me into and around the shop and as i was comming out of the shop one of them asked me if i was a man, my reply was "both". They continued to follow me and ask all the usual questions = "why did i want to be a girl" & "how long have i been like this"?
All i wanted to do was run and hide, i felt so embared and couldn't cope with the speed with which they were firing the questions at me.:angry:
There is a small childrens play erea within view of my house and 2 of the girls saw me enter my house so now the neighborhood knows where there is a tranny living. :angry:
Sorry for ranting on but i just had to vent off :sad:
Feeling better for that :happy: thanks for listening :happy:
(With a bit of luck there should be to photos attached to show what i was wearing??)
http://debbiegizmotv.mysite.wanadoo-members.co.uk/

[Eileen]

Good for you Debbie! You are getting out and yes we all get read from time to time. By your account, you seem to have handled yourself quite nicely. Your site is very nice and you look very feminine. Keep that positive attitude, a smile on you lips and most of all a smile in your heart.

Eileen

[uknowhoo]

Awww, Debbie, I'm so sorry to hear you had such an unnerving experience. Teenage girls can be merciless. :( FWIW, you did look lovely en femme, and there's no real harm done (except maybe a lil bruise to your alter ego:o ). Take care, Tammi

[StacyCD]

There is no good answer as to why some people are so intolerant of others. Just know that there are a lot more people out there that are more accepting. It's hard sometime to remember that we do this because it's fun!

[JenniferR771]

I hate when that happens!
---Perhaps there is a lesson to be learned here. Myself and all of us should be prepared for this situation. And be ready to respond. Perhaps even to turn the tables on them. Ask them, why are they following you? If they have questions perhaps they would like to sit down for a cup of coffee and you can answer all their questions one at a time. "My name is Debbie--what is yours? Does my hair look OK. Does this skirt look OK with this top? I am just learning about fashion--does this skirt make my butt look fat?"

[MJ]

aww i am sorry to hear that, but you did good and please don't worry the best thing to do is get out there again very soon, so you won't lose your nerve,
i am full time and have my bad days too , just log it up to experience

[trannie T]

If you can survive the Torment of the Tennybopper you can survive most anything. Sounds like you did well.

[Lori SC]

Debbie,

It sounds like you did a great job handling the questions... Since you were so polite to the girls, I think you did all of us a great service. They met a TG individual and saw her doing normal everyday things. I'll bet you made an good impression on those 5 girls! :bighug: It's not all about french maid outfits and fishnet stockings!

Yes, the girls were probably rude to ask all those personal questions, but the young are rude sometimes... remember back when you were?:confused:

Out in public, everyone of us comes upon situations that we are not expecting and frustrate us the first time. But if we get through them, we are prepared the next time it happens.

Thanks for sharing your story. I'll have to prepare for when that happens to me...

And you look very nice in the outfit.

Hugs, Lori:thumbsup:

[susie evans]

hang in there debbie you will just befine i had that happen to me about three years ago i an albertsons no far from where i live i was mortified the first time but learned from that experince what i do now is stop and i start asking questions like i'll bet you hope you look this good when your my age or you must be jealous because i have the best of both worlds the main thing i have learned is that old age and persiverance can out last youth and ambition any time :hugs: :hugs:

susie

[bobbie anne]

I also went geocery shopping ONCE. I was made as soon as I walked into the store. Some sales girls were huddled together and pointing and giggling. It was too much, I dropped the basket and got out of there. Do not want that experience again. Bobbie

[Gizmo, Debbie]

Thankyou everybody for the kind words:happy: Although i haven't post much on the forum i have been reading it for a while and fined the place so welcoming it's amazing:hugs::love:
I have had time to unwind and process the thoughts / emotions of the time and it hasn't put me off any :happy: i will go out again in time:happy:



A journey starts with a single step.

[Synchronicity]

If you go out, you're going to get tagged, there's no way around it. I've been fortunate that I usually just get looks and smiles, and have never been inundated by questions from a gaggle of young girls. All in all, however, I think it sounds as if it went pretty well, despite your nerves. The girls seem to be just curious and full of questions, and not disrespectful to you.

As for you now being the talk of the neighborhood..., well, that can be a little nerveracking at best, and I hope it works out for you. Who knows, maybe the girls won't say anything. :happy:

[Phoebe Reece]

If you go out a lot (and I do), that sort of thing is going to happen. I always try to turn it into a positive opportunity to educate someone. I smile and let whoever it is that's curious know that it doesn't bother me that they are asking questions. I answer their questions as honestly and politely as I can. I let them know I'm married and that my wife doesn't mind. I try to clear up any misconceptions they may have. I part company with them with a smile and I usually get a nice compliment from them on my appearance. Rather than fear such encounters, I actually enjoy them and look forward to them.

[krisla]

Teenage girls have cd/radar, I was also read when out with a GG freind, don't worry about it, they r just rude. u looked nice. Krisla

[Holly]

...Who knows, maybe the girls won't say anything. :happy:And maybe they'll come over and share makeup tips :eek: . Seriously, Debbie, I think you did fine. I was once stopped in the middle of a busy casino in Las Vegas by "inquiring minds." I spent about 15 minutes answering their questions and trying to educate them about who the transgendered actually are. Must have gone alright; we parted with a hug.

[Glenda58]

Sorry to hear about your encounter with the teenagers. But I have found that if you talk to them like you don't care what they think they lose interest in you. I have talk to many teenage girls while dress. Also when shopping I try to dress like all the other women so I blend in if women wear jeans shopping so do I. That way you don't stand out. So good luck on your next time out don't let this one time stop you.

[Jesse69]

I don't need to shop a grocery store in drag unless I buy womens items. Might accidently have a man hit on me there.

How did they read you first - by looks or voice? You don't look like a "guy in a dress."

[NatalieGirl]

One thing to remember: You don't have to answer any of their questions if you don't want to.

[ArleneRaquel]

I am very glad that you escaped this encounter without any physical harm coming to you, I am sure that it was a very frightening experience. I have had a few encounters with teenage boys, they are not very nice, but while not phyiscally threatening I did have a number of verbal insults thrown my way. " Drag Queen " is a favorite epithet :love: & :hugs: Trina - Old Irish Dame

[dods460]

I must say well done, I get thoughs kind of questions from my friends and it is a little frustrating, so well done for handling teen strangers. This almost makes me feel like going grocery shopping.

[Gizmo, Debbie]

I don't need to shop a grocery store in drag unless I buy womens items. Might accidently have a man hit on me there.

How did they read you first - by looks or voice? You don't look like a "guy in a dress."

I was read by looks:sad: as i approched the shopping centre they were standing huddled together in a fire-exit and i never gave them a 2nd look, but as i drew level with them they started giggling and i heard 1 ask her friends "is that a man or woman" (so they werent sure to start with:happy: ).
I got passed them and into the shopping centre and 2 of them ran past stoppped and turned "Told you" 1 said to the other.
They followed me into and around the shops.As i left 1 plucked up the courage to ask, my reply was "i'm both".
Upon reflection there actions and questions were that of genuien curiosity and i now think that taking the time to talk to them would have been a good idea.
I'll chalk that for experiance and hopefully i'll cope better next time?

[Penny]

I was read by looks:sad: as i approched the shopping centre they were standing huddled together in a fire-exit and i never gave them a 2nd look, but as i drew level with them they started giggling and i heard 1 ask her friends "is that a man or woman" (so they werent sure to start with:happy: ).
I got passed them and into the shopping centre and 2 of them ran past stoppped and turned "Told you" 1 said to the other.
They followed me into and around the shops.As i left 1 plucked up the courage to ask, my reply was "i'm both".
Upon reflection there actions and questions were that of genuien curiosity and i now think that taking the time to talk to them would have been a good idea.
I'll chalk that for experiance and hopefully i'll cope better next time?
I think you did marvelous. If we realize our mistakes, that is how we learn.
Next time you'll do even better. But above all, do not let this experience diswade you. The more we do, the better we get.

:hugs:

[RachelDenise]

Debbie, you were wonderful. You held your ground, finished shopping and probably showed some teenagers what real courage is. You represented and were positive. Thank you!

[Michelia]

Debbie:

It is probably a good thing you made it through this unscathed. Now you will be better prepared in the future. Just do not let it keep you in the closet. You looked fine out there.

I did have my first experience like this last week in a store and ended up talking to the girls after one had called me a pervert. Of course it was not the same because I was in drab. But we became friends. They had no idea we can be married and that we are not gay. It changes their perspective when they find out a little bit more about you.

Their following me home would really bother me, though.

Michelia

[Kahlan51]

In our society we push kids to be grown up as fast as possible. I think we need to realize that teens are still children and as such they are not easily repressed so take it as that. It seems to be a lot easier when I do that. I think you dealt with a difficult situation like a real lady Congratulations
Love Kahlan

[Cheyenne Skye]

Next time, consider what time of day you're going out. Is it the time that school let's out and the teenagers are going to be hanging out at the local mall? Maybe you'll encounter less resistance earlier in the day. Just a thought.