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View Full Version : First night out with my SO (long)



Topaz
01-30-2005, 01:58 PM
Hi Ladies,

This post is going to be a little different, cause it's from the prespective of a gg. I have mentioned in a few posts that my so and I were going out for the first time with her being dressed and got replies of let us know how it went - so here goes.

We were to meet a cd friend that we had met on a chat line and had never met in person. She asked us to support her being interviewed to join a local support group. The weekend before she was busted by a friend and had missed her original interview. Our daughter wanted to go along so we asked our friend if it would be ok and she was fine with it.

I've time lined this because it's way too long otherwise.

10:30 am - Daughter shows up to get ready for the evening - have to be out the door by 2:00 pm for meeting our friend at 4:00

11:00 - Jamie (my cd SO) asks me to find some blush for her because she ran out. I tell her I have to take a shower first.

11:30 - I've just finished my shower when my daughter tells me that a male friend of ours has just shown up unannounced (they are scrambling to get signs of Jamie put away before answering the door.)

OMG - 20 minutes later and he'd have met Jamie.

11:45 - My daughter and I are getting ready while Jamie talks to our friend and tries to tell him in a polite way he needs to go, we have places to go today.

12:30 pm - I'm out the door to find blush for Jamie and get gas for the car. Small town drug store closed, no blush at grocery store either - go get gas.

1:30 - Back from running erands, friend is still here. Tell friend we REALLY need to be gone in 20 minutes. Friend still hangs around.

2:15 - Friend finally leaves and WE'RE LATE! Jamie can finally start to get ready, but it takes girls such a long time.

2:25 - Jamie emerges from shower, starts to put make-up on. I'm also trying to finish getting ready. Get a "Honey can you find my gaff?"

We've just moved and things are a mess because of construction and not being fully unpacked yet. Run up stairs and start throwing clothes we don't have a dresser for onto the bed in search of a gaff.

2:35 - Found gaff - "Honey can you find my black stockings" - "Why didn't you ask me that while I was searching for your gaff?" Re-throw clothes all over the bed in search of stockings - find three no match on any of them.

2:45 - "You're on your own on finding stockings." Jamie runs upstairs settles on a pair of nude stockings instead. Meanwhile daughter is combing out wig for Jamie.

3:00 - Jamie is half girl half boy and we're out the door, finishing getting ready in the van. How much can I speed and not get a ticket? (tried to get ahold of friend to tell her we're running late, no luck. I never did have time to finish getting ready myself.)

4:48 - We made it to St. Paul but can't find a parking spot. Around the block 3 times no luck. Drop daughter off to make sure our friend is still waiting for us.

5:10 - Found a spot and into the club. Finally. She was still waiting for us, thank you, thank you, thank you!

I was nervious about meeting her and am rather shy, but we got along good. What surprised me was Jamie who was the one to clam up.

Our daughter had a delightful time talking to our friend and kept the conversation going. I'd chat a bit, but trying to get Jamie to talk was almost like pulling teeth. I've never seen this side of her before but we have always been one on one and not in a bar with other people. I did find myself keeping an eye open to see if anyone was going to say anything but no one did.

It was a gay bar with a group of cd's using the back room for a meeting. A couple of times when I went to the restroom I would have a cd in there with me, which didn't bother me at all. I just got to chat for a few seconds with another lady was the way I took it.

We all had a good time and Jamie needs to process all this for a while before she goes out again. I don't think it will take her long to process all the feelings she was having before she want's to go out again. She says she felt like a school girl going out on a first date. My hope is to plan a shopping trip in the spring when it's warmer with our new friend.

Sorry this is soo long.

I'm feeling really good about the evening and so is Jamie.

Hugs
Topaz

Tamara Croft
01-30-2005, 02:16 PM
Hiya Topaz

I'm so glad it went well for you. I can relate to ur SO clamming up... I showed a side of me Tammy hadn't seen before and it shocked her LOL... When I met another CD'r for the first time, it was a shock for me like it was for your partner. Was this the first time your SO had met another CD??

Tamara x

DonnaT
01-30-2005, 02:39 PM
Is Jamie normally quiet around others, especially new people?

I know I am, and it takes a while for me to warm up. Not a good conversationalist at all. Been rather shy my whole life.

After a second or third meeting, then I may open up.

racquel
01-30-2005, 02:56 PM
Topaz,thanks for sharing.You and your daughter sound like wonderful people.Jamie is very lucky to have you in her life.

Topaz
01-30-2005, 05:21 PM
Hi All,

Jamie's seen other cd's but never talked to one before that I know of, and I think that was part of it, but I also think it had alot to do with being in a bar for the first time dressed. Even though we were in a gay bar she was worried about the sideway looks etc. And she doesn't like crowds, never has.

Even though she claims to be shy in her male form you wouldn't know it. Meeting people for the first time as a guy is much easier for him than me. Get him going on the right subject and he'll talk his head off, first meeting or not. But in female mode she was doing the shy female things; will she like me, am I obvious, what do I say etc.

I think it might take another meeting or two for her to get used to being out dressed and talking with the friend we met, and others, to get her over her jitters. After she gets comfortable with herself being in public dressed it may be a whole different story.

Only time will tell.

Topaz

DonnaT
01-30-2005, 08:16 PM
Here's to more outings then! http://smileys.smileycentral.com/cat/7/7_4_13.gif

Helana
01-30-2005, 11:53 PM
Hi All,

Jamie's seen other cd's but never talked to one before that I know of, and I think that was part of it, but I also think it had alot to do with being in a bar for the first time dressed. Even though we were in a gay bar she was worried about the sideway looks etc. And she doesn't like crowds, never has.

Even though she claims to be shy in her male form you wouldn't know it. Meeting people for the first time as a guy is much easier for him than me. Get him going on the right subject and he'll talk his head off, first meeting or not. But in female mode she was doing the shy female things; will she like me, am I obvious, what do I say etc.

I think it might take another meeting or two for her to get used to being out dressed and talking with the friend we met, and others, to get her over her jitters. After she gets comfortable with herself being in public dressed it may be a whole different story.

Only time will tell.

Topaz

I was thinking that myself, that she was overwhelmed about appearing dressed in public and also perhaps talking in public - female appearance and a male voice don't match. When I have appeared in public I find myself almost whispering to my girlfriend as I am uncomfortable with my voice. Like all things in life, practice makes perfect so more outings are needed to build up her confidence.

I am always really excited and nervous at the same time that when I step through the door into the outside world I cannot say anything for a while until I can adjust my mind to the fact everyone can see me. Usually I don't regain my balance for about 30 minutes and my actions and behaviour are awkward initially. Then I get into a rhythm and have a blast.

ChristineRenee
01-31-2005, 04:02 AM
Topaz,

I deleted my initial response to your post from this thread...another smart azz attempt at humor gone awry. I just wanted you to know that I was really very pleased that your outing went so well and I know Jamie will do fine and be more herself the next time. Congrats to both of you!:cool: :)

Sorry again for my original response...didn't mean to make light of your triumph in any way.:o


Love,
Christine Renee

Topaz
02-01-2005, 01:47 AM
Hi Christine Renee,

You didn't offend at all, we both got a good chuckle out of it. I'm entirely used smart as*'s, I live with several and am one myself after I get to know someone. I know that in your heart you were happy with our triumph.

I'd like to thank you all for your encouragement, Jamie reads this also and it lets her know that people back her. I just need to get her involved in the forums more, right now she's having too much fun on the chat line here.

Hugs to all
Topaz

ChristineRenee
02-01-2005, 02:17 AM
Thanks Topaz...I'm glad you understood. I try to remember to keep my rather "unique" brand of humor confined to the Lounge where it belongs and use the other forums for serious dialoging. I am getting better about it but every once in a while I slip up. Thanks for being so understanding of me cause I know I'm not everyone's cup of tea necessarily.:D

That said, I hope Jamie will find the time to post here too. We would love to have her input and comments about her experiences...it is what we are all here for.:)

Thanks again for sharing your experience with all of us here. We'll look forward to hearing much more from you both in the future!;)

Love,
Christine

Tristen Cox
02-01-2005, 04:38 AM
Quite the adventure. I can understand why she clammed up I probably would too the first time and probably the second. However thats a step on to bigger things, and next time it may be much easier once she feels more in her element. Glad to hear you all had a good time. Thank you for taking the time to share your story. Sorry for not replying sooner. *hugs*


Love
Tristen

Emerald
02-12-2005, 08:02 PM
Hey there all... this is Emerald and Topaz's daughter. It was a fun night out... I had a blast myself.... though next time if Jamie doesn't talk more I might have to have mom do tickle torture while I merrily poke in the ribs!!! I can't wait to go out again with the girls... I'm bi and a little sexually ambiguous myself, so I just have a blast encouraging Jamie to do her thing and find herself and her style. I think it's great they found you all and this forum... I think it'll help. I'm sure if I kidnapp Jamie to some quiet little bars and get her out to meet more people she can talk to about this part of her life she'll open up... it's all kinda new so far. You've all been there, I'm ue you understand. Anyways, you rock!!! This forum is great and I'm so happy my parents found some compassionate ears. Huggles to you all for being so cool!!! Love, Gwen

Rikki
02-13-2005, 05:48 AM
Topas,

Thank you for sharing your story, It is incouraging to hear a story liked that. Jamie is so very lucky to have you and your daughter for support. My daughter and four granddaughters know that I cross dress, but haven't seen Rikki. I am not ready to show Rikki off yet. They all think it is alright and we have not talked about it, just to grandma. Anyways, I hope that you have many more stories to tell soon and the next time Jamie will open up some.


Rikki

carolynhcd
02-13-2005, 07:09 AM
Jamie, you are so lucky! I have a gf who completely surpports me emotionally as Carolyn and I only wish I had a bi daughter to push me into another man's arms. Best wishes