I've reached a dilema

[bredalee25]

It seems that now that i've got what i wanted. My GF accepting my dressing that i'm thinking why did i really want this. Was it because i thought it was not possible or was it because it's what i really wanted. These are questions i'm asking myself right now. Ever since she accepted my dressing i've been dressing most of the time and it doesn't seem to feel the same way as it did before she accepted it.

Have any of you experienced this sort of feeling after being accepted? It's like now i dress when ever and in front of her and it makes no sence to me why it doesn't feel the same way anymore. I once read a post by another member that said being accepted takes away the luster of dressing. Maybe thats what happened to me it's just not what i thought it would be and i'm really confussed right now. I hope someone can shed some light on this for me i'm all out of answers right now.

ttfn
:love:

[Karren H]

Maybe you have always been excited or attracted by the "danger" of doing something you weren't supposed to be doing (like getting away with something) and now that it's "legal", that "danger" has evaported....

I know It's like that for me somewhat.....

Love Karren

[Michelle (Oz)]

Coming out of the closet had the opposite effect for me ... dressed whenever I could to the extent of abusing the acceptance I had achieved. The degree of acceptance went the opposite way for some time. Now stike a balance with frequency and I very much look forward to my opportunities.

[Phoebe Reece]

With you dressing all the time, it has become less a "special" activity and become more of a "normal" activity. Take a break from dressing for a few days. It will seem more special when you do it after that.

Remember, you can get too much of a good thing. If you overdo the dressing around your girlfriend, you can quickly turn that acceptance into rejection. Avoid the "pink fog".

[susie evans]

i think it's like karren said now that you have won the race you need a chalengeing race going out shopping dinner other cd friends just a thought:D

susie

[Amy Hepker]

I would say that is what you feel inside that makes the difference. If you feel like you got what you wanted then I guess you got what you wanted. I always want more myself. No matter how much I get I am never satified.

[MJ]

being accepted takes away the luster of dressing yes it does, but now there is no danger in what you are doing you won't get caught and well now you dress a lot more the thrill is not there,

let me see you have a gg and she accepts you and your problem is ??
i only wish i had a gg
well take your cding to the next level that might help

[Kelly Greene]

I think the others have correct that when your SO does not know about your cding there is a thrill of doing something that is considered in your mind as taboo, but when the taboo is lifted the thrill is lost.
On the other hand loosing your SO or having her tell you that you can't crossdress is now something you don't have to fear. And a life with less fear leaves you free to find more thrills.

[marie354]

I was talking to my SO one evening about my dressing all of the time and asked if she was still sure it was ok with her.
She originally thought (hoped) that the novelity would wear off after a while and that I wouldn't want to dress as oftin.
I told her... Are you kidding? You've given me the greatest gift any CD'r could want. I love you for letting me do it all the time that I can.
Then I asked her the same question again. She still said it was OK!
The novelity may have faded a bit, but I'm still loving it, although going drab now sometimes seems odd.
:hugs:

[Stephenie S]

Dear Bredalee,

If you don't like it, don't do it. If the thrill is gone, leave it alone. We ALL know it won't go away so you know it will be back. Just give it some time, love. Take a break and relax for a while.

Lovies,
Steph

[Kate Simmons]

When the "cloak and dagger" stuff goes away, it does seem for awhile that the "thrill" is gone but that is I have termed for myself "GG syndrome". What that means to me is that things have settled out and it has more or less become the norm for you to be dressed. While it doesn't affect your overall attitude, it does somewhat affect the excitement part. It becomes your normal course of action and a regular thing. We talked about this before in respect for finally reaching your goal, what do you do for an encore? To me it means improving yourself as a person and doing little things to not only enhance your appearance but also your personality. We can always grow and improve in this way as a person, whether it's as a feminine person, masculine person or both. That in itself can be somewhat exciting. You have a distinct advantage Bren in that your SO is with you and supporting you and the two of you can grow together. The fact that it is not just about you anymore but the both of you is really nice and I wish you both nothing but the best.:love: Sal

[Jammie Lyann]

Little bit of both for me I will ALL ways be who I am , cant change that eccept for one way :heehee: however I dont get to dress as much as I would like an I am out to my wife an childern, I feel some times knowing that my wife knows has taken some of the luster away, but then a wait till I know she is going to be gone for several hours then I sneak or pretend she doesnt know and it make things better for me. anyhow it helps me hope it give you an idea. :love:

[Sandra]

Before there was always the chance of being caught the thrill the rush now that has gone. How about enjoying it and not worrying about it.

[Kristen Kelly]

Dear Bredalee,

If you don't like it, don't do it. If the thrill is gone, leave it alone. We ALL know it won't go away so you know it will be back. Just give it some time, love. Take a break and relax for a while.
Lovies,
Steph

I agree with Stephenie let it go for a while. Don't let other deterimine what is right for you, we all do not have the need to dress 24/7, find your level that makes you happy.

[Tamera]

It seems that now that i've got what i wanted. My GF accepting my dressing that i'm thinking why did i really want this. Was it because i thought it was not possible or was it because it's what i really wanted. These are questions i'm asking myself right now. Ever since she accepted my dressing i've been dressing most of the time and it doesn't seem to feel the same way as it did before she accepted it.

Have any of you experienced this sort of feeling after being accepted? It's like now i dress when ever and in front of her and it makes no sence to me why it doesn't feel the same way anymore. I once read a post by another member that said being accepted takes away the luster of dressing. Maybe thats what happened to me it's just not what i thought it would be and i'm really confussed right now. I hope someone can shed some light on this for me i'm all out of answers right now.

ttfn
:love:

I don't want to make this feel off track. But I once liked a beer that wasn't readily available in Ohio. It was Coors beer. But I had a girlfriend that new someone and when they would go out of state they would get me some. Then it became readilly available in ohio and it just didn't seem the same. I still drank it cause I liked it but it wasn't the same.

Sometimes some of us have a side of us that likes to be mysterious and when that is broken into things don't feel the same. But not everone knows your other side so you are still mysterious to most of the population. Be happy that she has accepted. Many have SO's that don't so you have crossed a major milestone in this. Also she may have a mysterious side of her that you by dressing is fulfilling. You seem to have a good relationship going, one that many of us wish had. Continue your questions, we will be there for you.
Tamera

[jodie]

My girlfriend actually wanted to take me shopping this weekend....for panties...It was quite thrilling and very erotic to be walking around having her tell me what she thought I'd like good/sexy in...which were ones were cute and playful and which ones felt wonderful....which styles looked good on me...

I eyed other things like camisoles and a baby doll pj set in Victoria Secret....
We haven't reached that level yet, but I think she really is turned on by me being in panties....I don't know where it will go...

I am enjoying the ride, but as I said, i consider myself a lucky man to have someone in my life who understands and wants to participate. i know that is not the case most of the time.

HONESTY and being true to yourself is the key.

Above all else, you have to be honest and true to yourself.

If I have learned anything it is that.

I wish you all the best.
Hugs,
Jodie

[Marla S]

Before there was always the chance of being caught the thrill the rush now that has gone. How about enjoying it and not worrying about it.
Reading the replys your are absolutely right.
Thrill and luster are misconceptions of CDing IMO, if you want acceptance or accept yourself.
Acceptance is a silent joy, learn to listen to it. The thrill is loud, but has its ugly sides too.