Oooh buuuggggerr! Bittersweet....

[pocoyo]

I just got a call from my GP and she said she can refer me for gender therapy... but it's to somewhere about 2 hours away. And I'm such an idiot about travelling at the moment due to my balance stuff/anxiety.
There is nowhere local :(

She said I can think about it and then get back to her.

OOoooh nooooo.. What do I do? :( :(

On the one hand.. wahey... I could be referred for gender therapy today....
but on the other hand.... B*LLOCKS... I probably couldn't get there without a lot of panic and fear and trouble and.....grrrr, feck!!

[Abraxas]

Nowhere local? Aww man that sucks. Sorry. :(

[pocoyo]

Yeah it is a tad annoying. Ho well!

Perhaps I will be able to find someone local by doing a bunch of research myself :happy:

[Abraxas]

Yeah, that's the spirit!

You're so optimistic... I try to be, but sometimes I forget. :heehee:

[pocoyo]

Haha so do I sometimes... I WAS tempted to swear a little... :heehee:
Meh... pas de probleme. Where there's a will, there's a way!

[Kate Simmons]

Too bad I don't live there . I would take you of course. Too bad I'm not younger also, you cute little ....oh don't get me started. Hey, I'll swear instead #@!*&^%$:p

[Holly]

Pocoyo is there someone that could give you a ride? How about public transportation? Is that an option if no local counselor can be found?

[pocoyo]

Hehe thanks Salandra :happy:

Holly, yes there I people I could go with but even WITH people I have a hard time travelling right now. :( Oh well.. I am sorting that out, slowly but surely.
Public transport wise...I prefer having a car near because then it's almost like a little base while I'm away from home.

Thanks peeps :hugs:

[dancinginthedark]

awwwwww Pocoyo that sucks not having a local person for gender therapy. :hugs:

I have suffered from anxiety and it sucks big time. :( I know for some the idea that travel can cause so much stress is foreign but I get it. Heck I live it. :strugglin Toss in a new situation and it can be nearly unbearable. I suggest what I smo-- erm use but it's illegal. hehe

Right there with you on wanting my own car or a friend’s to jump into when traveling, kind of a safe haven when you’re swimming in a sea of anxiety. I tried the bus once and it was not good. Never again. Well at least not till I get myself together more. Getting there and so will you hun.

I use books on tapes now or some good music to help distract myself. And it helps having an understanding friend to keep the conversation going and that knows me well enough to zip it when needed.

I think the idea to keep researching is a good one. Hey maybe get the name of the one a couple hours away and ask them if they know of someone closer. I’ve done that with other specialist in the past with good results. They know the field so well it’s likely they know where others are too.

dancin

[bi_weird]

Dang that sucks! I know how the travel thing is - my Mom hates to travel. I'm going to school an hour from my home town, in the same place that my older brother went, so my whole family has been up and down the road here a lot, and Mom still almost never drives up. It'd really be tough to combine the whole "OMW GENDER THERAPY" with that travel stuff. I wish you luck figuring that out.

[CaptLex]

Oh crap! Sorry to hear that - two hours is a long trip, especially when you're dreading it. I hope you can find something closer. Got my fingers crossed. I suppose therapists don't make house calls or do phone sessions, huh?

[Tina Dixon]

Dude, look at it this way, ROAD trip:thumbsup:

[Adam]

that sucks its the same for me though its so far i have to stay in a hotel the night b4 but its worth it to get things sorted well thats what i thought anyways :D

[Dasein9]

I know this is nowhere near the same scale, but for a while I was scared to travel in New York. (Go ahead and laugh, Cap'n! You were raised here! )

One thing that helped a lot was getting an MP3 player. If you don't already have one, and if your finances allow, maybe having familiar music piped directly into your ears could help.

Good luck on finding someone local. And if you have to do the travel, then remember:

You're Poc the Brave!!! (*strumpet blast!*)

[RevMoonSerpent]

The two hour travel really stinks. I know what you are going through Poc. I have social anxiety disorder and if I have to travel any longer than 15-20 minutes I need to be heavily medicated first.
The only thing I have found to help is the same suggestion Dasein made. Get yourself some music that you can plug into with headphones. It allows me to daydream and block everything else out. It doesn't always work but in most cases it does make things a great deal better.

[CaptLex]

I know this is nowhere near the same scale, but for a while I was scared to travel in New York. (Go ahead and laugh, Cap'n! You were raised here! )

One thing that helped a lot was getting an MP3 player. If you don't already have one, and if your finances allow, maybe having familiar music piped directly into your ears could help.

I have to laugh, Das, 'cause now you're a Bronx tough guy.

I second Das' advice, Poc, I won't travel on the subway or buses without my MP3 player - or at least with a friend to help me take my mind off the crowds. Find something that will help you stay distracted (maybe a Playgirl magazine). :D

[kerrianna]

:hugs: awww, like you said 'feck!'

I hope you can find someone closer. 2 hours is a long way away for anyone if you ask me. I thought you lived on a blooming island. Isn't everything only 30 minutes away? Sure looks small on a map.

Apparently Tina is willing to go over and give you a ride on the back of her bike. That should just about finish you right off.

Seriously, I do hope you can find someone closer. The music idea is good, but you're still looking at a long trip eh? Good luck. :hugs:

[Kieron Andrew]

I thought you lived on a blooming island. Isn't everything only 30 minutes away? Sure looks small on a map.
The whole of the UK would sit in the size of Alabama

[kerrianna]

The whole of the UK would sit in the size of Alabama

And you can get quite a few Alabamas to fit into Canada.

Not that we'd want them...oops...any Alabamans (Alabawomans?) here? :p

[pocoyo]

Alabanians? :lol:

[Kate Simmons]

Aldebarans maybe, Poc.:heehee:

[ZenFrost]

Some therapists do house calls I know, but they are very few. And some do over-the-phone therapy. There also may be a way to have therapy over the internet in the form of a video chat. You should try calling and asking about options, there may be a way to compromise. (ie. you drive halfway, the therapist drives halfway, and you meet somewhere in the middle).

[pocoyo]

Dancin' - urg yeah it totally sucks. The annoying thing is it's all mixed in with my balance which can make me feel sh*tty anyway. So even if I'm staying calm sometimes I will feel rough and have anxiety-inducing type symptoms anyway. Grrr. Thank you! Yeah it's hard to understand if you've never felt it. I'm sad that you have though :( I'm glad you too are slowly recovering. That's awesome. Keep up tha good work! ("It doesn't matter the size of my steps, as long as I am faced in the right direction"!) Ah yes... I will try ringing them.

Bi - hehe yeah 2 stressors together.. meeeep! Thank you very much.

Cappy - Er I dunno... not that I've heard of but I will investigate! Thanks mate.

Tina - hahaa awesome. That's a good attitude.....

Adam - ahhh you're so cool :D I'm glad you do that. What a cool dude!
Meh. Maybe I'm just not in a place to "get it sorted" right now? Hey ho...

Das - awwwwww poc the brave :hugs: Thank you. Yeah I do have an ipod mini, but it's been playing up a lot lately. Perhaps I will get it fixed/save up for a new one/cheaper version. That's a cool idea. Sometimes that used to help me be able to take my dog for little walks when I was more anxious. Although the only bad thing about listening to music is that being cut off from the world like that can make me feel even more disconnected and odd sometimes. But usually I think it does help. Music is magical :) (So is Stephen Fry... one of his audio books helped me travel to and stay at my Dad's at Christmas 2005 hehe).


LMS - awww no :( I hope you are going to get much better soon. That totally sucks. It's nice to know that others know how I feel, but it's also horrible that they know how I feel! Yes music is a great consideration, thank you.... feel better soon!!

Cap - hey that's awesome that Das is now all brave and tough and used to be scared... hoorah! :D
Yeah music, goood plan. Yes things often feel far less scary if you have a friend with you. And as for Playgirl magazine.......what a good plan ;)

Kezmo - it's reassuring that people are saying it's even hard work for a "normal" person. Because I've felt under a lot of pressure to travel there (same place I SHOULD be going for my ears) ... like I should just be saying "Hey ok then... wheee!" lol. Hehehe Tina!
Yeah I will try and find someone closer :happy: Thanks!

lol Sal!!

Zen - they do??! Woah. Never heard of that here... I hope they do though!
I can't imagine anyone here making that much effort to help, but excellent if they would! Thanks for the ideas :happy:


Cheers for your support mates and matesses lol :bighug:

[Felix]

Sorry to hear that Poc, it's a real shame they couldn't get ya one nearer. Lets know how it goes hun ok xx felix :hugs: :hugs:

[pocoyo]

Thank you lovely Felix! I will :)
:hugs:

[RevMoonSerpent]

Originally posted by Pocoyo
LMS - awww no I hope you are going to get much better soon. That totally sucks. It's nice to know that others know how I feel, but it's also horrible that they know how I feel! Yes music is a great consideration, thank you.... feel better soon!!

Thanks for the support Poc. :hugs: Unfortunately I won't be getter better. This is about as good as it gets for me. I have a psychiatrist and psychologist. On medication also. Sometimes I have good days but, more often than not I'm trapped in my small world. It can be sad at times but at least when I'm home I'm not physically ill.
I just hope you will be able to find away to get the type of care you need. I've got my fingers crossed for you.:happy:

[pocoyo]

Waat? :(
Well I hope that sometime in the future you can get better....
Have you ever read any books like Feel the Fear and Do It Anyway?
or the survival guide to panic attacks?
Or... seen this....

http://www.panic-attacks.co.uk/panic_course_contents.htm

Wow that's just so harsh. I think probably if you believe you can do it then you can... it just takes a lot of getting there.....
Oh LMS I'm so sorry you are having to feel so horrible :( :hugs: :hugs:

[Edit: ... perhaps if you get the right counsellor/therapist for you, then they will be able to help you work through little tasks and goals and gradually, gradually get better. Maybe you just haven't found the right counsellor/therapist for you...?! Some are not very clued up at all, but some can be excellent. :thinking: Perhaps cognative behavioural therapy would help? My mum has never got on with any of her counsellors, but now she does art therapy and that really helps her. That could even be worth a try! :happy: I hope you do get some good help and get much better soon anyway. :hugs: ]

[Dasein9]

Poc, if you like audiobooks, please allow me to recommend The Iliad and The Odyssey on CD or Mp3. The Robert Fagels translations are excellent. I've never been able to read epic poetry without falling asleep, but it's a whole different thing to listen to it! And they're rich enough to listen to again and again and again.

[pocoyo]

Oh wow Das that's so weird... I had been meaning to check those out!
Ok then, if you think the audio versions are the way to go (and could be helpful in some situations too ;)) then I will sooo check them out.
Groovy advice. Thanks Cool Das :D :D

[bi_weird]

I've never been able to read epic poetry without falling asleep, but it's a whole different thing to listen to it!
Even the catalog of ships? Wow but that was boring to read. Well okay, to be honest, I skippd a lot of that part...but the rest of The Iliad was quite wonderful.

[Dasein9]

Actually, I think the audiobook of The Iliad is a tad abridged. I talked to a Classics major I know about it, and she said not to worry, the only things removed are things that only Classicists care about. :D

[pocoyo]

Kieron Andrew is my hero!!!!


He's only gone and given me the information for a cool counsellor who is going to TRAVEL TO ME!! Yes ladies and gents you heard that right... the kind lady is going to TRAVEL TO ME... and she KNOWS ABOUT GENDER STUFF (like the only person in this area that does!)!!!

WOOOO!!!!

Awww Kieron you can have my cookie rations for a year mate!!!

:hugs: :hugs: :hugs: :love: :love: :bighug:

[kerrianna]

YAY! Way to go Kieron! You are such an awesome dude!

Don't eat all the cookies at once though. :sick:

That's great news Pocs. I hope you like her and it all goes well. As much as we love and support you here, I know seeing someone who has experience with gender stuff will really help you. Good luck. :hugs: :love:

:love: for Kieron :hugs:

[Kimberley]

POCS, this is good news. Even so, please be a bit wary.

This counsellor is coming to you? How and where will you meet? Is she establishing an office in your area? What are the credentials? What is her approach? These are just a few of some very important questions.

The reason I ask is, Red Flags have gone up because I have never heard of such a thing; anywhere.

I really do hope this is on the up and up for you.

:hugs:
Kimberley

[pocoyo]

Aww thanks Kerrianna... ooh I hope you didn't think I meant I was going to use her to talk to instead of you guys!
I meant that it is very very very rare to get to see someone (counsellor-wise) with experience in gender matters here, without having to travel (instead of a "normal" counsellor).

Thank you :D :hugs: :love:

[pocoyo]

POCS, this is good news. Even so, please be a bit wary.

This counsellor is coming to you? How and where will you meet? Is she establishing an office in your area? What are the credentials? What is her approach? These are just a few of some very important questions.

The reason I ask is, Red Flags have gone up because I have never heard of such a thing; anywhere.

I really do hope this is on the up and up for you.

:hugs:
Kimberley

Haha don't worry I think she is legit.
She did tell me her credentials and was suggested through Kieron by someone that's seen her.
She is travelling to me because she does home visits and because I am "disabled" at the moment due to my balance thing. And because she knows that it's very hard for people with gender issues in this area to get help.

But I will double check stuff with her don't worry :) Thanks Kimbs!
My mum is a trained counsellor too.. and she was naming the same qualifications and stuff that mum has done.
I will double check with my mum too.

Thanks Kimbo :D :hugs:

[Abraxas]

Too cool! :D :thumbsup:

[pocoyo]

Too cool! :D :thumbsup:

Woo! Thank you sir :D

[Kieron Andrew]

POCS, this is good news. Even so, please be a bit wary.

This counsellor is coming to you? How and where will you meet? Is she establishing an office in your area? What are the credentials? What is her approach? These are just a few of some very important questions.

The reason I ask is, Red Flags have gone up because I have never heard of such a thing; anywhere.

I really do hope this is on the up and up for you.

:hugs:
Kimberleyshe is legit! there is no way i would give Pocs name or anyone elses over for that matter that wasnt legit....she see's many MTFs i think however Poc will be her first FTM lol............there are lots that do home visits over here if the need is there......

Poc just out of curiousity how much is she charging you???

[Kieron Andrew]

Kieron Andrew is my hero!!!!


He's only gone and given me the information for a cool counsellor who is going to TRAVEL TO ME!! Yes ladies and gents you heard that right... the kind lady is going to TRAVEL TO ME... and she KNOWS ABOUT GENDER STUFF (like the only person in this area that does!)!!!

WOOOO!!!!

Awww Kieron you can have my cookie rations for a year mate!!!

:hugs: :hugs: :hugs: :love: :love: :bighug:
yvw only too glad to help, even if you did say dont worry about it lol............do i get your tequila rations too?:heehee:

[pocoyo]

The price - erm well that may vary as she didn't realise how far it was a 1st (she gave me another call).

Hehe well I didn't want to put you out and anyway I only said don't worry about it in relation to telling people where I live cheeky :p

Thanks so much dude :D :hugs: :hugs:
Of course you can have my tequila rations :D :bighug:

[Kieron Andrew]

Of course you can have my tequila rations :D :bighug:
what about your time with the ladies rations??? no??? i guess thats pushing it a bit far eh lol

[pocoyo]

Hehe well I guess I could allow you a little babe-time....... :thinking:

[Kimberley]

Hmmmmm. Dont I have something to say about this??? Hmmmm?:tongueout

Okay, you can have Queen Kong....:D

[kerrianna]

*shyly raises her hand*

I'll volunteer to spend some time with that nice Kieron fellow. :battingeyelashes:

[Kimberley]

Figures.... you volunteer for everything. Why didnt the crew just about go half crazy when you climbed up to the crow's nest to be the lookout? :devil:

Dropped a couple of kegs of the Captain's private stock as I recall.:D

[CaptLex]

Wow, that's fantastic news, Poc! :D I always said Kieron is a great source of information. K, you deserve free cookies . . . for life! Poc, I hope you hit it off with the new therapist and you feel comfortable opening up to her. Keep us posted.

[Kieron Andrew]

*shyly raises her hand*

I'll volunteer to spend some time with that nice Kieron fellow. :battingeyelashes:
yay!!!!!!!....... i could get used to this! Poc got anymore favours you want doing in return for girl time lol

[pocoyo]

yay!!!!!!!....... i could get used to this! Poc got anymore favours you want doing in return for girl time lol

:yikes:..... no comment hahaha :lol2:

[Kieron Andrew]

:yikes:..... no comment hahaha :lol2:
dare ya!

[pocoyo]

Oh well, I'd get banned..... :D

[Kieron Andrew]

Oh well, I'd get banned..... :Doops! i'll take the dare back lol

[Casey Morgan]

Alright Poc! I am so happy for you. :D (That grin is meant in a nice way.) Sometimes when you dare to take that first step, things start to fall into place.

And three cheers for Kieron! Dude, that was awesome. (Sorry, sudden T spike there.)

[pocoyo]

Haha thank you Casey, yay! :happy:
Yeah... give it up for Kieron :D
Alriiightt!

[Kieron Andrew]

Haha thank you Casey, yay! :happy:
Yeah... give it up for Kieron :D
Alriiightt!
ok ok enough with the bloody praise! i didnt do it for that reason! so quit it already!:o

[pocoyo]

Bahaha... WE LOVE KIERON, WE LOVE KIERON..... :lol2:
Oh come on you must know by now that saying that would have the reverse effect on me :heehee:

I know you only did it cos you luuuuurrvee me....

Just kidding.

Hey Kieron I am uploading another video which is for you and the gang. Don't expect it to be viewable any time soon though... you know youtube! :rolleyes:

[Kimberley]

ok ok enough with the bloody praise! i didnt do it for that reason! so quit it already!:o
*******************8
You mean you didnt do it for the cookies, women, tequila? I'm shattered....:tongueout

[Kieron Andrew]

*******************8
You mean you didnt do it for the cookies, women, tequila? I'm shattered....:tongueout
oh ok i did it for that reasons but not for the praise :heehee:

[Kimberley]

That's okay then. We wouldnt want any inflated egos.... such a trait of ..... oh never mind.
:D