why are we......?

[cocopuff]

why are we the way we are? this is a question i'm sure that most of us have asked ourselves. is it genetics? is it a hormonal imbalance? or is it personal preference? i'm sure there could be other explainations. doctors, researchers and others have come up with theories. but that's all they are is theories. an opinion. cd's are for the most part, the same as everyone else. some are single. some are married and some have kids. some are in meaningful relationships (like me) and hope to marry that person someday. we all go to work everyday. we enjoy our hobbies. we enjoy going out to eat. and we enjoy spending time with family and friends. in the olden' days...men wore short dresses, high heels, tights and wigs. that was normal for those days. somewhere along the timeline...society redefined how men and woman dress and present themselves. in the mid 1900s...society was up in arms about woman wearing pants. these days...designers have run out of design ideas, so they started taking mens clothing and putting a womans clothing tag on them. and wouldn't you know it...woman started buying and wearing them. in the days of disco, men wore platform shoes ( high heels ). but that was ok..it was the style. but through all the ages, men are men and woman are woman. nobody thinks twice about a woman wearing mens clothes. that doesn't make them any less of a woman. just because we wear womans clothes, doesn't make us any less of a man. i guess the bottom line of all this rambling is...we each know who and what we are. if you are secure, comfortable and happy with YOU....that's all that matters. i say..the heck with what society says. yes, i am a crossdresser. yes, i am secure with my manhood. yes, i am in a relationship with a beautiful, loving woman. hopefully she will marry me someday. she has a wonderful son and mother. i have a good job and a nice house. i wouldn't change my life if i had the opportunity. i am happy and proud of the person that i am and won't let society bring me down. society will someday have too accept us. we are not the ones with the problem. as long as we are honest and true too ourselves...that's all that matters. i am proud to be associated with each of you.:hugs:

[Karren H]

Well girly.... You'll probably get a whole lot of theorys on this and that but when it comes right down to it ....... Why, doesn't matter one bit!! And the search for "why" shouldn't be undertaken in my opinion!! Because if you knew "why" and spent a lot of time and effort finding it, would it change a thing in your or my life?

NO!! Wouldn't change the way we feel or what we love to do!!! So finding out something that has no effect, isn't worth finding out!!!

So go buy a new dress and don't get caught up in the why thingy, silly woman!! Hehe

Love Karren

[Staci G]

" and thats all I got to say about that"
Forest Gump.

And I Agree

[marie354]

I so glad that you feel right with the world. That the way that I wish all of could feel.
My first outing is getting closer and closer all the time. I reciently was in touch with a CD friend that I met through this site and neither of have been out anywhere before.
We are making plans to go together soon to a gay bar to see "how it goes" and find out if that's a cool place for us to go. I've never been there, but I'm hoping it will be OK as some gays don't care too much for CD'rs. Time will tell, I guess.

Well anyway... It's nice to have you here as all thoughts and comments are welcomed.
:hugs:
As far as it being a hormonial imbalance or whatever... It really doesn't matter to me anymore. I tired of wondering about the whys. Now it's just the wheres... Wheres me going? out to have fun I hope.
:hugs:

[Charleen]

Gotta agree with Karren on this one! I've read so many threads on this, and there are as many theories as threads.I tried to figure it out for years before I found this site and only drove myself buggers!
For me today, the why don't matter. I am, and have found that working on accepting that I am rather the why, is time better spent.
Welcome to the site!
Live and xxxx, Lily

[Wendi0012]

You couldn't have said it better. If you want to be accepeted you have to respect yourself first and be true to yourself in all that we do!

[Tina Dixon]

Well there you go, some one found the pot of gold at the end of the rainbow:thumbsup:

[SandyR]

And who cares! I enjoy dressing, it feels right and it is fun! In my opion, quit trying to figure it out and go with the flow! Go buy some new shoes, always helps me!


Hugggss.....
SandyR

[sami1952]

Does it really matter why we are the way we are? Now this is my own opinion,the only person that can really explain this is god himself.No doctor or expert in human behavior can explain this.We were born this way and that the end of this story.

[Mary Morgan]

Karren has got it right. It really doesn't matter in terms of how you will act. If there was any value at all in knowing why, it might come from a change in the societal attitude toward us. I think many of us feel that if we could convince society that it is natural, genetic, etc., society would make it easier for us to be ourselves. On the assumption that no answer will come in our lifetimes, or that the answer won't be the one we want, or maybe there are as many answers as there are CDs, it remains up to us to be who we are, and make our own way. Sure it may require a little thicker skin, but who isn't struggling for acceptance at some level?

[susie evans]

i agree with karren i don't want to change any way i have the best of both worlds :heehee: :heehee:

susie

[MarinaTwelve200]

There is no ONE ANSWER to to WHYwe CD. There are several different reasons for CDing---At least 10 or more, usually unrelated to each other and will vary from person to person.

Its the devil to get at what causes it in one's self or another individuals as sexual, social and psychological issues associated with CDing tend to cloud one's thinking in these matters, not to mentionon has to KNOW ALL the different reasons, before one can begin to evaluate how each of the different reasons may apply to them.

As a "Scientific type" I can't imagine someone not having the curiosity to get to the bottom of why one may behave in an unusual way. KNOWING why I CDhas been helpful, as it has releived me of worrying about other, "more distressing" possibilities that may have been causing it. There is also the satisfaction of having solved a mystery, and also, the benifits of knowing exactly what to do to make my CD experience evenmore rewarding.

Knowing WHY you CD dosent make you quit, only more comfortable with it.

[Kate Simmons]

I personally know why I do it. In the long run, though, it really doesn't matter. Accepting yourself for who you are and enjoying that is the main thing. Life is just to short to fuss and obsess about it and a waste of energy really. I prefer using that energy discovering myself and making friends. Just seems like the natural thing to do to me.:happy:

[RobertaFermina]

Too busy exploring *what* to wonder about *why*.

Anyhow, when I ask *why* I answer "Cause MMMMMmmmmm, Yummmmmmmm! Wow !......Verrrrry Interesting ! OH and Let's Play!, and What Fun! and....."

That's why !

[Trisha]

i dont ask why i just do it and get on with life as life is far too short to ask why

[eleventhdr]

I do not know about you just maybe.

But i dress because i like it and want to when i do dress and besdies that i reallly do want to be female it is something i do desire just as well since i have been female in many many past lives i do want and desire it yet again it is far better to be female thenn male far better!

Suzy!

[PaulaJaneThomas]

why are we the way we are?

Incomplete masculinisation of the Sexually Dimorphic Nucleii in utero.

[Dragster]

Like most of you, it doesn't matter to me how I developed my CD tendancy, but I'm an engineer, and I'm always curious to understand things. The only theories I've seen that seem to make sense is the hormonal balance in the mother's womb during the first 3 months of gestation. Testosterone results in a pre-wired masculine brain, programed to be attracted to women and male pursuits; oestrogen results in a female brain, attracted to men and female pursuits. Most male babies are programmed with a male brain, and females with a female brain, but it's no wonder that different combinations of hormones give a complete spectrum of orientations between 100% gay and 100% hetero, and we CDers fall somewhere within this spectrum. We know we can't help it, we were born this way, so we make the most of it. I think there must be a trigger point at some time in our lives, when we actually put on an item of female clothing and feel the excitement that becomes "addictive", otherwise we'd all feel CD from birth, and there are some who only get to it later in life. But I wonder what motivates us to take that first step!

Unfortunately, my wife can't accept any of this (yet), she still thinks it's like an alcohol addiction, I should just be able to stop, cold turkey! I must say that since I discovered this "explanation", I've become much more accepting of gay behaviour, even though I've only met an odd one or two. As they say, with knowledge comes enlightenment, with enlightenment comes acceptance. Now how do I get my wife to accept the knowledge???

Tony

[darling_felicity]

I'm with Karren and most of the rest. If it makes you feel good and it doesn't hurt anyone else, "Why" doesn't matter.

If it does effect someone else it means you have to be more careful. "Why" still doesn't matter.

Luv, Felicity

[PaulaJaneThomas]

I think there must be a trigger point at some time in our lives, when we actually put on an item of female clothing and feel the excitement that becomes "addictive", otherwise we'd all feel CD from birth, and there are some who only get to it later in life. But I wonder what motivates us to take that first step!

I think there's often some event in our childhood which makes us aware that there is something we would like to do only to be told "boys don't do that" or something.

[Iniquity Blonde GG]

if id known what made me what iam id have asked for a refund :straightface: sometimes i sit and wish i could erase my life, and be a BETTER person, and start again, failed marriage, rubbish @ realtionships !! , mother, the list goes on.
theres no a mannual to tell you how to live ur life, and it will pan out , wish there was , but..... you learn by your mistakes, so ...... its natures way of testing us & making us what we are i reckon :rolleyes:

[Stephanie Stephens]

Spending time thinking about why I like to wear womens clothes takes away from the time I can spend shopping for womens clothes.

I do believe that I am woman and I do believe that I am man and the two of us need to get dressed.

I just love you all for for being the way you are.

Stephanie Stephens

[Angie G]

At leastfor me I dress because I can and I don't care why :hugs:
Angie

[Karren H]

Incomplete masculinisation of the Sexually Dimorphic Nucleii in utero.

......... Induced by Alien abductions...... Yeah! Saw that on the SciFi channel too!!

:D

Love Karren

[PaulaJaneThomas]

......... Induced by Alien abductions...... Yeah! Saw that on the SciFi channel too!!

:D

Love Karren

Scoff if you want to but there's evidence which points to SNDs being the key to GID.

[JenniferMBlack]

The reason why is as unique as the person I belive. There is no one reason for a group of poeple or a series of some what like individuals to do what ever it is they do. So I say stop trying to figure it all out because humans are not made with a cookie cutter and noone is programed like a robot, thats just life and as I call it the human factor. Thasts my :2c: worth.