Would you do a total transformation?

[michelleupnorth]

Hi everyone, my first post and I'm glad I've found this site. Other people that I can relate to. I've been dressing in womens clothes ever since I can remember. I'm 43 and just out of a second relationship, (free to be me again.) I find that now that I'm on my own, I'm dressing all the time in woman's clothing. I still haven't gone out of the house yet in full dress up but it's going to happen soon. I'm thinking about going all the way with the whole transformation. I'm talking about removal of facial hair thru electrolisis first, then eventually hormones, implants, FFS and what ever else needs to be done in order to make me passable.

I'm wondering if I'm the only one feeling this or are others thinking the same if given the oppertunity how far would you go to be a woman?

Just wondering, confused and scared.

I'll be posting my pic soon.

[laura47]

Love dressing but never had the courage to go public fully dressed . I would not change the plumbing for anything.

[Marla S]

Living alone, dressing 24/7, but having skiped to try to mimic women, I have the impression right now that I am further away from transitioning than ever.
Might change some day, who knows.

[Sharon86]

Hello Michelle, i'm pretty much sure that you are not the only one having those feelings, me however, would have to be dragged kicking and screaming out through my front door, what ever you decide to do with your life, i wish you well. Sharon. xxx

[Staci G]

I would go all the way with it up to SRS but that would never change the fact that I love women and have no inclinations toward men at all. So I guess i would have to be a lesbian. My only hold back is $$$$$$$$$$$

[franvonceder]

Hi Michelle
I'v been crossdressing for many years and enjoy dressing up. Yet to brave going in public dressed, but I know I will soon. No wish to have body changed by drugs or the surgeon's knife.

Fran.

[MJ]

well for me yes i am on hrt and in plants well lets see what happens with my hormones my mom and sisters are d cups so over time i may end up a full b or c enough for me time will tell , and ffs well again let time and hormones do it's thing and see.. oh and the boy's have got to go ,, i think working on that it all depends what happens in march .
this is a big step don't rush it take your time be sure this is want you want
After srs you can't go back

[marie354]

If this old bod of mine would handle it, and my SO would let me, I'd go ahead with the HRT, but nothing more. I already fill an A cup and would like to have more along with the softer skin, etc. that comes with HRT. Even if him shrinks a bit... It's not the size of the wave...... Sex is not as big of an issue at my age, but I love my woman and am always there for her whenever she needs.
:hugs:

[RobertaFermina]

I am getting a significant emotional shift, and feminine experience through dress and attitude change alone.

I imagine a game-board like in "chinese checkers" where there are circular divots where the marbles can be trapped and come to rest.

So far, my marble is rolling past these as it circulates between the masculine and feminine zones. I can't predict whether my marble will ever or never fall into one of these feminine divots where I decide it is THE place for me to stay. If it did, I'd have to reconsider.

Till then, lassiez les bon temps roulez !

:rose: Roberta :rose:

[PaulaJaneThomas]

I'm talking about removal of facial hair thru electrolisis first, then eventually hormones, implants, FFS and what ever else needs to be done in order to make me passable.

And if you still don't pass after all that?


I'm wondering if I'm the only one feeling this or are others thinking the same if given the oppertunity how far would you go to be a woman?

I'm more concerned about being me than I am about emulating a gender stereotype.

[michelleupnorth]

I'm positive that with today's technology I would pass. How much needs to be done is not sure at this point. Could cost me lot's of money but if I do decide I'm sure it would all be worth it.

[Phyliss]

".....if given the oppertunity how far would you go to be a woman? "

I guess that last question just about sums it up for me. IF given the OPORTUNITY I'd go "all the way" BUT I can talk a good game when I know that it would never happen. Would have to consider the rest of my family and how they'd react, $$$$$$$, career, and a host of other things, BUT if all the planets were to align correctly and I REALLY had the choice, I'd do it.

[Jenn S.]

I plan to spend money in the future on facial surgery, but for now I'm just trying to keep my hair in good shape while growing it out and am about to start the facial hair removal process.

[marie354]

It would take a lot with me....
Facial hair removal.
Eye lift and brow waxing.
Nose and chin augmentation.
Breast enhancement.
Not to mention the HRT/SRS to go all the way.
We're talking literally 10's of thousands of dollars here, maybe more. As well as a few years for the physical changes from HRT.
Just a nose job would be at least 1500-3000 dollars alone.
If that's what you want to do and you can cover the costs, I'd say go for it.
:hugs:

[jessica.M]

i dont no if i would go all the way i like have @@@ with girls and wouldent want to change that but it probly cost around 30,000 or more dpeends on all you are geting done but good luck with it and if u have the money and go thorugh all the theory and drugs u ahve to go one years dressed as a women i think or something like so good luck:2c:

[Nigella]

wouldn't change a thing, quite happy being me a "bloke in a frock" albeit 24/7.

No dreams, thoughts or desires to change what nature gave me!!

[danielle40I]

Hi Michelle

Perhaps you should take a moment to think about the fact that what you are considering is truely permanent. It's quite normal to become wrapped up in that feeling of "gender euphoria" after a relationship ends...new found freedom to express yourself as you've always dreamed you wanted to. I've been there.
And the question has already been posed...what if after all your effort and expense you don't attain the presentation you desire. There aren't any do-overs at that point.
Do what you feel is best for you in your heart and, with courage, proceed as your heart dictates.

Talk to us...we all will listen.

Dani

[Ugly Michele]

I did brave going out in public for first time today micky d's tight top, leather skirt, amd stockings was great. Plan to do it again very soon. You should try it first then decide your life changes. If you can't do now would you be able to as a woman? Good luck.:happy:

[michelleupnorth]

I do know that there is no turning back once I start. I'm not having these feelings because of my relationship break-up, I've been wearing womens clothes so that I can feel like a woman since I was about 9 yrs old. I've always hid it from everybody. When I'm out in public I'm looking at all women and wishing I could be them.

[Margie]

I, like others here, wouldn't dream of going out in public alone. I only do it with my wife and my dressing is very limited so as to not be very noticable. I've often fantasized what it would be like. At 61 I'm satisfied with both sides of me. Read "Crossing Sexual Boundries" by Ari Kane-DeMaios & Vern Bullough. It's a real good book and gives you what is really entailed in going the route.

[kerrianna]

Hi Michelle, good advice here so far.

What you're proposing is a huge huge step, and will involve a lot of difficult procedures and put you through an emotional roller coaster, so take your time examining that path if you chose to. I notice that many TGs serious about transitioning get themselves a therapist specializing in that issue, which I think is a good first step. If you are serious about it make sure you go in with your eyes wide open, know why you are doing it, what it entails, and have an idea what to expect later.

As for me it's way too much pain and work considering I'm not unhappy being male some of the time. Not to mention everything else in my life anchoring me in who I am.

I notice that a common feeling amongst people who really feel they HAVE to transition is a deep disgust of their birth gender. I don't have that so it's not a serious consideration for me. For those that do I can see why they might want to move forward. But you'll never be a GG, you'll always be someone who bought the package.

[Violetgray]

My friend Gary went through this same ordeal when he was maybe only 2 years younger than you. He tried and tried to resist, he had an ex-wife, a kid, he moved in with his mother, to stop himself from transitioning.. His mom passed away, and Gary became Kristina.So I guess my point is, no, you're not the only one going through those things, and we are what we are...

[Brianna Lovely]

I dress on a semi-daily basis and I do go out in public dressed.

I'm happy with the female attributes that are a part of my mind and Spirit, every day. My body presentation will have to remain a matter of illusion, so there's no SRS in my future.

Would I consider SRS, if I was much younger? Maybe.

[Sierra Evon]

Love dressing but never had the courage to go public fully dressed . I would not change the plumbing for anything.

I would never change my plumbing !!!!

[Karren H]

Well I don't want to BE a woman so I've gone as far as I want right now... Just enjoying my fem time when I can fit it in!!

And how far you want to go depends on your situation... Jor job, family...and your age... In my opinion!! The younger you are the more bang for the buck you get by going all the way!! Pun intended!! Hehe

Love Karren

[Tamera]

If I was younger and knew then what I know now and had the money I would do everything except, for now, change my plumbing, and I'll tell you why.

If you have a part of your body removed, like a leg or arm, there is a pain called "Phantom Pain". I'm afraid I would have this pain if my plumbing was removed.

Maybe after all the changes were made I would think of this last task a little more in depth.

I don't want to seem rude or crude but a doctor once said it was easier to make a hole than make a pole.

[Andrea Nicole]

Michelle,
You have been "dressing" for about 30+ years and haven't been out of the house yet. I really think your are quite a ways from these monumental and PERMANENT changes.
The "passing" aspect should definitely not be your number one objective.
Confidence and presentation are well above passing with regard to objectives.
Take Care,
Andi ....

[Teresa Amina]

But how far? I'm having my beard lasered, I've had an unsightly scar removed from my forehead, and I'm learning the chemistry of all this HRT stuff. The temptation is huge, as are the consequences. After running from myself for decades I've turned about to face Me. I must be dealt with now, and have the freedom to do as I wish. Yet this is itself the danger. To go too far is easy. What you need can be had with or without official blessing, everything that needs monitoring can be done. But only by testing yourself out in the world can you know if it's really for you or not. So I guess my position on this is Kinda-Sorta-Maybe-We'll See:D

[Andrea_girl]

change my plumbing? not at this moment in time.

Although the thought had crossed my mind.

[MJ]

well changing the plumbing does not make you a woman, you can do everything else and still keep the twig and Berry's, it's how you feel that counts. anyway , and Confidence and presentation are well above passing with regard to objectives. are so true
why would you want to change the plumbing, unless you want to be with men .. and that takes a very long time to decide if it's right for you
i am still not sure myself and i have been on this road a long time
there is a lot of good advice here take it to heart

[viky carr]

I think some of us have the desire to do the complete transformation, implants, hormones ect. but personally i would not do it, i feel good the way i am and i'm glad that i can be her whenever i want to, :thumbsup:

[jazmine]

Sometimes I fantasize,I would love to do the whole nine-yards(hormones,implants,ect). But there are so many people in my life that I think it would hurt. I know I shouldn't give a rip what they think, and they should be supportive unconditionally,....but that's not how the world works.I have no problem in remaining in my born gender. Anyways, I like being a guy who loves crossdressing. I look at it as a wonderful gift.......something I really LOVE doing. I'm still trying to work up the courage to to go out as "Jazmine" with my wife to one of the TG friendly places in my area,.........but for some reason,,,,,,,I am SO nervous and scared to. All of you have been such an inspiration to me, that I think I may be able to do it one day soon. I just wish that I knew another CD near me, that my wife and I could tag along with, that has already been to those places and knew people. It would also be nice to know another CD, as to get ready over their house,.... as my relatives live RIGHT next door to me! AW WELL......I'll make it out soon.

[michelleupnorth]

Thanks so much for all the advice. I've just got off the phone with someone who is very supportive of my lifestyle and still wants to be my SO. I think that my first step is going to be to see my family doctor so I can get referred to a specialist for some counselling and take it from there. I will be going out in public as soon as I feel that I'm passable enough. I'm so tired of trying to hide this side of me and I'm glad that the woman in me is coming out (slowly).

I do agree that it's not what is between my legs, it's what is between my ears. That is what is telling me that I am a woman inside. I'm attracted to women and even if I do get the hormones and everything else needed to make me look like a woman in the mirror I'll probably keep my package down there because I can still satisfy my SO whoever that is going to be. I guess you could say that I'm a lesbian.

I look forward to hearing from more of you out there that battle with this and once again thanks for making this site a home for me.

[Glenda58]

Michelle before you go do the hormones go out dressed for a week to see how it feels. Then a month and don't wear any male clothing. because that's what's going to be like. See your family dressed because once you change you can't go back. I like both worlds so I won't do hormones again. And I do go out for days at a time.

[joanlynn28]

It is all the way or nothing, to do anything less would leave me incomplete. I have been on the path for a very long time 35 years plus, just did not have the courage to do anything about it until I hit my forties but this is something I suspected about myself for most of my life. I am just happy know that I am able to leave as my real self from now on. Been on HRT for three months and running and SRS is in my plan 2-3 years in the future, by than I will be near retirement eliglibility and will take whatever my path leads me to in that point in time.

[michelleupnorth]

Joanlynn 28 your words are such an inspiration to me. I'm still scared but would love to talk more with you about our challanges and what to expect.

[ToyGirl]

yes :) wouldn't have it any other way.

[Lisa Golightly]

I'm more concerned about being me than I am about emulating a gender stereotype.

Right on the nail badger girl :)

[PaulaJaneThomas]

Right on the nail badger girl :)

I had an inkling you might agree Lisa :D

[JenniferR771]

Dr Renee Richards well-publicized transexual (and professional tennis player in both the men's and women's curcuit) from the 1960's has a new book out, "Second Serve".
A respected eye-doctor.
In her 70's now, seems she is not so sure the SRS was a good idea.
I think she has a book interview on NPR public radio today--but I couldn't find the exact time or show.
Amazon link:
http://www.amazon.com/Second-Serve-Renee-Richards/dp/0812880757

[susie evans]

this is a very serious question for me i will stay as i am the way i see it i'am extremely fortunate to have the best of both worlds and don't think it would make me any happier in life :2c:

susie

[Samantha Lough]

I would and in fact I am trying to work toward that.....

[Ranee Daze]

It is a giant leap from closet dressing to GRS (Gender reassignment surgery) and I wouldn't cionsider it so lightly. I have a friend here who went all the way, and was shunned by his family, children, friends, lovers....
All this to say that there is more on this plate to consider. Here in Canada there is a reason they insist on psychiactric sessions before they cut you with the scalpel.
For me, I don't need HRT and sur-ger-y to feel like me as a she. I just need a good block of time, a break in the finances and Ranee is out shopping and visiting salons. Then I can come home, shower off and store the trappings and enjoy the other of my wonderful lives. Going all the way would trap me in the femme mode....what a bore!

[michelleupnorth]

So I've decided to come out and do the transformation. I've told three of my girlfriends and all three were very supportive of my decission. I will begin my transition slowly and I'm seeing my Dr on the 27th to get reffered to a specialist. As you can see from my pic I will be doing surgery of some sort (look at that apple in my throat, lol) and whatever else is going to be required to get me to the end result that I want. I thank all of you who are supportive of my decision and for those that are not I welcome your thoughts as well.

The picture of me is wiyhout any make-up and it shows. I'll be posting a picture in the future with make-up and something sexy on.

I love all of you.
Michelle

[michelleupnorth]

noticed that my pic didn't load how do I do that now. Confused like the body I'm in

[Courtneygurl]

Don't be too sure about your sexual orientation post-transition. It's only natural, with T still poisoning our bodies, to assume we'll still be attracted to women. Estrogen has it's own effects, and many girls out there have been (pleasantly) surprised that they now find men attractive. Who would've thought?

[Penny]

The only reason to be a woman would be to be able to wear woman's clothing, smell like a woman and wear makeup with longer hair plus tossing in jewelry. Sorry, but that's not good enough for me. I would have to assume the role and that would require years of psychotherapy with the end result having to live in a man's world. Woman still face discrimination.
I do go out in public enfem. For the most part, I dress however I feel. I do appear approriately to my true gender when necessary or when I want. I don't visit a therapist now and don't wish to create a reason to see one.

:hugs:

[eleventhdr]

I would change my sex IE gender givien the rela chance to do so also would like to, be much much younger once again.

But you know money is the stil the ket\y here oh oh i wish someone would also come along that would give us girls a real chance to be who and what we do deisere to be.

OH well

maybe someday this will happen just hope i am still around when it ever doeI would want t way to change once and for all to female without al of the hassel of sugurey and all of the stuff about couseling and wating and wating to become what i am inside female.

Oh well
you know what they say good stuff maybe happens to those who wait well i ma wating and waiting..
Here i am plaese come along and help us all who evcer is out there that ever can do so we are all wating.

Thank's Suzy!

[michelleupnorth]

Hi Suzy, I plan on keeping my job in the military so that I can afford the funds required to finally fix what has been broke for so long. The pain and money are such a small price for me to pay and it's secondary to me.

[SANDRA MICHELLE]

Not this girl. i do wish to have fuller and larger breast and would have implants if I could get away with it or if I was totally out to everyone. I love my time as a woman and hope for more oppurtunities as they present

[Cristi]

I want (and think I am close to having) the 'best of both worlds'. The ability to go out enfemme whenever I want, but then to easily go back to boy mode to enjoy the many advantages of being male in this society.

[Billie Renee]

Yes in a heart beat if I could afford it but for now I'll just have to be me and luckly I don't have much body hair and it is easy for me to shve it off and no sign of it for at least a week as for face hair never even could grow a mustache or a beard so no problem there either.

[janelle]

Give me the money honey & it is a done deal. I can start living life to the fullest. Isn't that what its all about.:2c:
:hugs: ,
Janelle

[Maija]

I would if I were younger and single

[Marcie Sexton]

If there was a pill that would give me 25 years back, I would with out a doubt, but now I'll settle for life as it is...

Before you take the big step, go the pro way...Find a gender therp. and go from there...

Good luck

[Kelly Greene]

Being able to fill our a bikini would be great.

Having to live life as a woman, because of my apperance would be a major adjustment and would require a great deal of counseling.

Having SRS is something that I can't to because I only want to look like a woman not become a woman. I am attracted to my wife and for me men are just part of the wood work.

[Trinni]

As for me no I wouldn't because I like being a guy and doing guy things. Just take it slow and easy. Make sure that is what you want to do before you take steps that can't be easily taken back if you change your mind.

[paulaN]

I have thought of leaving everything behind and going for it, up too srs. But I'm to old to start over. the thought keeps coming back in my head. I can't seem to shake it.

[michelleupnorth]

I keep hearing that I'm too old, if I were younger I would do it. I'm 42 and that is what I was thinking as well. I've also thought about the rest of my life. I'm still good for at least another 40 plus years so now is the time for me. I'm not wanting to settle, I've done it all my life so far and it has to quit

[Teresa Amina]

I keep hearing that I'm too old, if I were younger I would do it.

It seems like a good excuse for some, another handhold to keep from sliding even further towards the big T-word. At 51 I could use it if I wanted to, but I've read enough now to know that really isn't much of an excuse. It's been successfully done at much older ages than most are using as "too old". I think it depends on how much you want it whether or not it's successful.

[Felica_ann_lendy]

well i am not sure if i would go all the way but i am considering implants

[Lanore]

I already feel female even though I was born male. I've felt this way for a very long time. Rather than figure out why I feel this way, I just go with the feeling. The older I get, the more I know I need to make some serious changes, all good. I figure that's the benefit to being single. The only opinion that matters is mine.

Lanore

[Sally24]

I do electrolysis for my facial hair now. Can't wait for next year when it is all gone! I've considered some minor plastic surgury, not a full FFS or anything but have decided against such a large change. If I had the money I would have laser on all my body hair (I eppilate it all right now) and have some work done on my facial skin texture to smooth it out more. I would also have liposuction done on my belly to try to get it flat, but wouldn't have anything added anywhere. I do pretty well in public now, so only a little fine tuning would be nice. I still want to be able to "pass" as a guy so major changes would be too much.

Sally

[JenniferMint]

I'm thinking about going all the way with the whole transformation. I'm talking about removal of facial hair thru electrolisis first, then eventually hormones, implants, FFS and what ever else needs to be done in order to make me passable.

I think electrolysis/laser for permanent removal of facial hair is a pretty safe step to take for any M2F here, unless one might want to grow a beard in the future!

[Beth J]

Transitioning can be a daunting endeavor. Cross dressing is entirely different mindset than transitioning. Cross dressing is a great segue for moving toward that goal. Be prepared, however, for a SIGNIFICANT change in lifestyle. Be financial prepared as well. FFS and electrolysis are very expensive. I have spent upwards of 35k in my journey. I have much, much more to do. It IS worthwhile IF and ONLY if this is what you need to do. I anticipate total cost of facial hair removal alone to be 5k. Factor in the cost of hormones, doctors and therapist visits and your piggy bank becomes quite lean. Finally, there is SRS and maybe breast augmentation. I'm not trying to discourage anyone considering transitioning, rather just offer what I have learned in my journey. Oh, but it is SOOOOOOOO worth it!

[michelleupnorth]

Transitioning can be a daunting endeavor. Cross dressing is entirely different mindset than transitioning. Cross dressing is a great segue for moving toward that goal. Be prepared, however, for a SIGNIFICANT change in lifestyle. Be financial prepared as well. FFS and electrolysis are very expensive. I have spent upwards of 35k in my journey. I have much, much more to do. It IS worthwhile IF and ONLY if this is what you need to do. I anticipate total cost of facial hair removal alone to be 5k. Factor in the cost of hormones, doctors and therapist visits and your piggy bank becomes quite lean. Finally, there is SRS and maybe breast augmentation. I'm not trying to discourage anyone considering transitioning, rather just offer what I have learned in my journey. Oh, but it is SOOOOOOOO worth it!


I guess that I'm lucky. Living in Ontaio SRS is covered and my health plan also covers 80% of my drugs. Being in the Military it may be possible for them to pay for some of it and if not I have income coming in. I so look forward to it and I'm getting excited.

My Dr is sending me to a trangender clinic for testing and I hope it doesn't take too long. I've been waiting 43 years

[Lovely Rita]

I respect your wanting to, but not for me. I love the masquline side of myself just as much so I am happy with the minimal, like shaving legs and dressing up. I do understand others have the need to do more.

thanks for letting me share.

[btmgrl6]

I am doing it.....It's right for me.. I have been living as a female for years. I am a female..no doubt about it.

Steph

[Gina_darling]

Over here we have the NHS that pays provided you get referred by your psychiatrist for gender reassignment. Unfortunately there are thoseout there that rushed into it not fully ready for the change and have been left wanting to come back. It is a HUGE decision, one I will never make. In my job I remove many sets of testes daily and am aware of the effects it has on the body afterwards. You will lose your sex drive almost totally, your metabolism is vastly reduced but your appetite goes up the perfect combination for ballooning weight. So be sure to think long and hard, but otherwise good luck! :hugs:

[JoAnnDallas]

If I could now go back to my life when I was in my 20's, single, rich enough that I did not have to work, I may well considered either going full time or transistioning. Also if I was single and rich, I may well go full time when I retire in 8 years.

[Angie G]

Not to thatextent bit if it were possible I'd dress 24/7 :hugs:
Angie

[Lovely Rita]

I love my plumbing so I would not go much further than what I am doing right now.
Happy as I am.