Valerie Nicole
02-12-2007, 10:02 PM
Hey everyone. I made a thread about this before, asking people if they thought I should come out to my parents. Many of you suggested I didn't. Somehow, this only further incited me to do so. Maybe it was reverse psychology. Maybe the people who suggested I not tell my parents were giving me reasons that seemed to be the opposite of how things are for me. All I know is that I ultimately decided to listen to those who supported the idea of coming out to my parents, and also those who told me to do what I thought best.
Let me set the scene for you. It's early afternoon/evening (5pm-ish). I'm in the car with my parents, about a half hour into a two hour car ride following a doctor's appointment. At this point, I'm considering telling them later in the week. So I say to them, "there's something important I need to talk to you guys about, can we commit to a time later in the week?" They agree to this...but my mom started getting worried and asking questions. She also told me several times that they are my parents and that they will accept, support, and love me no matter what. Finally, I decided I was going to tell them. I asked my dad to pull the car over (didn't want him getting any kind of shock while driving). After struggling for about 5 minutes (though it seemed more like 5 hours), I managed to form a complete sentence..."I...am...a........................................ ..crossdresser."
At first what I got was two blank looks. My dad said, "really?" I said yes. That was about as bad or negative as their reactions got. We talked about it for a while. They had questions they wanted answered. My mom wondered if maybe it was her fault for discouraging me from wearing girls' clothes when I was little. They also wanted to know if I was gay. The questions were nothing out of the ordinary, and certainly nowhere near offensive or negative. They asked me if I had or would ever go out in public. They told me to be careful who I share it with. They said they were worried, not because I was doing anything wrong, but because this way of life is largely unaccepted by the world. They're right, I couldn't deny that much of it.
I'm glad I told them. I mean, I'm not going to go flaunting Jessica around them. They don't even know about Jessica as a person. We've just scratched the surface of talking about this, but the fact remains that they know and all we can do is work through it together. I'm glad I told them, because I no longer have to live in fear of being discovered. I encouraged them to do some online research and come to me if they have anything they want to say or ask about. They told me that I can do the same with them. This was a positive experience, and I realize just how truly lucky I am to have the parents that I have.
Let me set the scene for you. It's early afternoon/evening (5pm-ish). I'm in the car with my parents, about a half hour into a two hour car ride following a doctor's appointment. At this point, I'm considering telling them later in the week. So I say to them, "there's something important I need to talk to you guys about, can we commit to a time later in the week?" They agree to this...but my mom started getting worried and asking questions. She also told me several times that they are my parents and that they will accept, support, and love me no matter what. Finally, I decided I was going to tell them. I asked my dad to pull the car over (didn't want him getting any kind of shock while driving). After struggling for about 5 minutes (though it seemed more like 5 hours), I managed to form a complete sentence..."I...am...a........................................ ..crossdresser."
At first what I got was two blank looks. My dad said, "really?" I said yes. That was about as bad or negative as their reactions got. We talked about it for a while. They had questions they wanted answered. My mom wondered if maybe it was her fault for discouraging me from wearing girls' clothes when I was little. They also wanted to know if I was gay. The questions were nothing out of the ordinary, and certainly nowhere near offensive or negative. They asked me if I had or would ever go out in public. They told me to be careful who I share it with. They said they were worried, not because I was doing anything wrong, but because this way of life is largely unaccepted by the world. They're right, I couldn't deny that much of it.
I'm glad I told them. I mean, I'm not going to go flaunting Jessica around them. They don't even know about Jessica as a person. We've just scratched the surface of talking about this, but the fact remains that they know and all we can do is work through it together. I'm glad I told them, because I no longer have to live in fear of being discovered. I encouraged them to do some online research and come to me if they have anything they want to say or ask about. They told me that I can do the same with them. This was a positive experience, and I realize just how truly lucky I am to have the parents that I have.