Cross-dressing (the fetish): What's it all about?

[QZ2]

This forum is the best, not much need to look anywhere else. But I just ran across a well thought out essay that I found interesting (and quite long). It starts out:

Subject: Cross-dressing (the fetish): What's it all about?

Why do we do it? Who does it? When do we do it? What do we get out
of it? Is it just a fetish? What do we do? Are we Gay, Bi, Hetero
or unique? Is there a cure? If there was would we want it anyway?
What does it mean for our Significant Others? Are CDs (Cross-
Dressers), MIPs (Men In Panties) and TVs (Transvestites) different...

And goes on. I especially liked his hints to the SOs.

It is too long to post here but if you're interested you will find it at: http://groups.google.com/group/alt.support.crossdressing/msg/a1b896516e4d8cd2?

Love to all, Susie

[Kawigirl]

This forum is the best, not much need to look anywhere else. But I just ran across a well thought out essay that I found interesting (and quite long). It starts out:

Subject: Cross-dressing (the fetish): What's it all about?

Why do we do it? Who does it? When do we do it? What do we get out
of it? Is it just a fetish? What do we do? Are we Gay, Bi, Hetero
or unique? Is there a cure? If there was would we want it anyway?
What does it mean for our Significant Others? Are CDs (Cross-
Dressers), MIPs (Men In Panties) and TVs (Transvestites) different...

And goes on. I especially liked his hints to the SOs.

It is too long to post here but if you're interested you will find it at: http://groups.google.com/group/alt.support.crossdressing/msg/a1b896516e4d8cd2?

Love to all, Susie

Ok, just for grunts and giggles, here are my short & quick answers to the provided questions:
Why do we do it? It feels just too good! Besides, does anyone question why a GG wears jeans & sneakers or work boots, then a mini & 5” stilettos?
Who does it? More people then you know!
When do we do it? Depends, some, like me, as much as possible.
What do we get out of it? For me, a feeling of satisfaction, it’s also an escape from reality and at the same time, a chance to taste what I wish I could be.
Is it just a fetish? For some, others it’s a craving, for some it’s an addiction.
What do we do? From wearing just a little around the house to full dress in public.
Are we Gay, rarely. Bi, some. Hetero, mostly. or unique? Sure, you’re unique just like everyone else!
Is there a cure? Is there a cure for love? Duh, It’s not a disease! If there was would we want it anyway? It’s a desire, a “want”! Wanting to change would be in effect, wanting to not want a want, Double DUH
What does it mean for our Significant Others? For some it’s a fork in the road, it’s something to share, to play with, add spice into the relationship.
Are CDs (Cross-Dressers), MIPs (Men In Panties) and TVs (Transvestites) different...
MIP’s are afraid to “Go all the way” or are on the way!

[CDTiffany]

i love crossdressing!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! YA!!!
xoxo tiffany

[Trisha]

simple because im me end of story yawn

[Peggy55]

That was a very good article. While I have only been at this for 6 months or so I do enjoy it. It does bother me however that it is a very reclusive "hobby". Social interactions take a back seat to the desire to stay home with the curtains drawn and dress up ALONE. One other worrisome thing is the "no cure, won't ever go away" thing. I have not had a girlfriend during my dressing escapades and I worry about continuing to live a life of solitude, lonliness and reclusiviness. I will never be an out of the closet dresser...just don't have the desire to go there...... so what to do?

[Peggy55]

Here's more reading for y'all.....

http://www.jenellerose.com/htmlpostings/darkside/Temperament.htm

[Angela E.]

I`ve read this on another thread.Me to a tee, really.:hugs: Angela.:koc: :GE: :kissing:

[Katie-Jayne]

God this makes sense to me. If only I could get my SO to read it but I think it's too late for that.

It seems to be escapism to a large degree for me - which I seem to do with alot of my pastimes/hobbies.

[Melinda G]

One other worrisome thing is the "no cure, won't ever go away" thing. I have not had a girlfriend during my dressing escapades and I worry about continuing to live a life of solitude, lonliness and reclusiviness. I will never be an out of the closet dresser...just don't have the desire to go there...... so what to do?
__________________


I dressed through 17 years of marriage. Then I had two five year relationships, and my share of short term girlfriends. The sex was OK, but highly overated. Never quite lived up to the expectations. Very few women want to put on nylons and heels, and a lingerie show for you. Always went back to the CDing. So do what I do. Develope non sexual relationships with women for the companionship, and exploit the CDing to the fullest. I'm also in the closet for life. It's just not something I care to share with anyone. But not being in the sack with anyone, leaves me free to shave myself as often as I please, keep my toenails painted, dress up whenever the urge strikes, dress around the house as often as I wish, etc, with no fear of being found out. Works for me. I'll never get married again. Too restrictive.:2c:

[PaulaJaneThomas]

http://groups.google.com/group/alt.support.crossdressing/msg/a1b896516e4d8cd2?


Total mindless b*****ks.

[Tina B.]

Total mindless b*****ks.

I don't often find myself agreeing with woodland creatures, but i have to agree with the badger!
and if he is going to write things like that,he needs to learn his terms. he has TV and CD backwards from everything I have ever read. I think going that deep into the subject should be left to the pros. sometimes if you are to close it's hard to see the forest for the trees.
Tina B.

[marie354]

I don't often find myself agreeing with woodland creatures, but i have to agree with the badger!
and if he is going to write things like that,he needs to learn his terms. he has TV and CD backwards from everything I have ever read. I think going that deep into the subject should be left to the pros. sometimes if you are to close it's hard to see the forest for the trees.
Tina B.

:iagree:

[Roxi Loh]

I think the article is right on the money for me but I am sure not for everyone. I have often toyed with the idea of quitting...knowing in the back of my mind I wouldn't. I have never been with another CD although I love to fantasize about it. I suspect it may never happen. I have gone to a mistress who has dressed me up and made me up and has been a wonderful gg friend. This has made the solitude of being a transvestite more tolerable. I love everything about it except the loneliness.

[Peggy55]

Angela, I've posted this link on several occasions. It's always worth a re-read. Amazing how many aspects of thgat article ring true for so many of us!


I`ve read this on another thread.Me to a tee, really.:hugs: Angela.:koc: :GE: :kissing:

[Peggy55]

I for one need that sexual side of a woman so my situation is a bit more perplexing! Somethings gotta give!


I dressed through 17 years of marriage. Then I had two five year relationships, and my share of short term girlfriends. The sex was OK, but highly overated. Never quite lived up to the expectations. Very few women want to put on nylons and heels, and a lingerie show for you. Always went back to the CDing. So do what I do. Develope non sexual relationships with women for the companionship, and exploit the CDing to the fullest. I'm also in the closet for life. It's just not something I care to share with anyone. But not being in the sack with anyone, leaves me free to shave myself as often as I please, keep my toenails painted, dress up whenever the urge strikes, dress around the house as often as I wish, etc, with no fear of being found out. Works for me. I'll never get married again. Too restrictive.:2c:

[Sugar01]

My dressing is fetish-based, not lifestyle-based. Just like in the genetic world, CD'ing has many variations.

[Chloe Jean]

I enjoy dolling myself up. Love painting lips, coating my lashes with Mascara.
Being ladylike is such fun- . I don't know Category I fall into and really don't worry about. I do want to get an extreme makeover, be turned into a glamour girl and have pics taken. My goal is to go out completely en femme.
Hugs to all you girls.
Amerlia

[Kate Simmons]

I just do it when I feel like it. I'm totally in control and do it because I want to. As far as classification, I don't classify myself, never did, never will.:happy:

[Rachaelb64]

You know if take out all the pseudo-intellectual cr*p then there is some reasonable stuff in that 'essay'.

:happy:

[jayseedee]

Thanks for the kind words Susie,,,,, James (jayseedee)


*******
I'm sorry if it strained your brain! Jay

[tracy_Trevor]

I dress therefore I am. (Apologies to some French gentleman).

[MJ]

Why do we do it? because there is this drive compulsion to do so

Who does it? 2.5 out of 10 male's do it

When do we do it? when we get the urge or time to do so

What do we get out of it? for me it's who i am, the chance to be me. but it is different foe everybody


Is it just a fetish for me no never was

What do we do? just go out have fun, shop anything i want
Are we Gay, Bi, Hetero or unique? i say unique

Is there a cure? If there was would we want it anyway? i am not sick or ill so i don't need a cure ..... that said i would not want a cure no way

What does it mean for our Significant Others? a difficult time of adjustment or divorce , either way a lot of hurt feelings and pain , we come out of the closet then lock our so in the closet

Are CDs (Cross-Dressers), MIPs (Men In Panties) and TVs (Transvestites) different... yes keep reading all the post :happy:

[jayseedee]

I don't often find myself agreeing with woodland creatures, but i have to agree with the badger!
and if he is going to write things like that,he needs to learn his terms. he has TV and CD backwards from everything I have ever read. I think going that deep into the subject should be left to the pros. sometimes if you are to close it's hard to see the forest for the trees.
Tina B.

Odd that you seem to be the only one that thinks I have it backwards! Perhaps you need to read some more. And who said I wasn't a "Pro"?:tongueout

[jayseedee]

You know if take out all the pseudo-intellectual cr*p then there is some reasonable stuff in that 'essay'.

:happy:

I'm sorry if you didn't understand all the words Rachel but thanks for the compliment anyway. James:rolleyes:

[Joy Carter]

No fetish her babe. I'm the real deal. :be:

[noname]

It's kind of like asking why do women like to wear pants and skirts. Obviously because it's what they want to wear.

- women who wear pants and skirts and shocked, just shocked their husband would like to do the same thing.

[jayseedee]

Total mindless b*****ks.

You seem to be in a minority of three so far of the hundreds who have read it. You can read can't you?:rolleyes: James Brown MSc (psy).

[jayseedee]

It's kind of like asking why do women like to wear pants and skirts. Obviously because it's what they want to wear.

- women who wear pants and skirts and shocked, just shocked their husband would like to do the same thing.

I can see why you have no name!:rolleyes:

[jayseedee]

Ok, just for grunts and giggles, here are my short & quick answers to the provided questions:
Why do we do it? It feels just too good! Besides, does anyone question why a GG wears jeans & sneakers or work boots, then a mini & 5” stilettos?
Who does it? More people then you know!
When do we do it? Depends, some, like me, as much as possible.
What do we get out of it? For me, a feeling of satisfaction, it’s also an escape from reality and at the same time, a chance to taste what I wish I could be.
Is it just a fetish? For some, others it’s a craving, for some it’s an addiction.
What do we do? From wearing just a little around the house to full dress in public.
Are we Gay, rarely. Bi, some. Hetero, mostly. or unique? Sure, you’re unique just like everyone else!
Is there a cure? Is there a cure for love? Duh, It’s not a disease! If there was would we want it anyway? It’s a desire, a “want”! Wanting to change would be in effect, wanting to not want a want, Double DUH
What does it mean for our Significant Others? For some it’s a fork in the road, it’s something to share, to play with, add spice into the relationship.
Are CDs (Cross-Dressers), MIPs (Men In Panties) and TVs (Transvestites) different...
MIP’s are afraid to “Go all the way” or are on the way!


Pity you didn't actually read the whole thing.

[Girlieboy]

It's a girl thing: we do it to be ourselves, hun.

Diane XX

[jayseedee]

It's a girl thing: we do it to be ourselves, hun.

Diane XX

Do you know what the word "rhetorical" means? Unfortunately you have to read the whole thing:straightface:

[Casey Morgan]

I will never be an out of the closet dresser...just don't have the desire to go there...... so what to do?

Do you mean that no one will ever know you crossdress, no one will ever see you crossdressed, or no one will ever see you crossdressed outside your home? (Or something else perhaps?) Those are three different scenarios with three different approaches. I just want to be sure I know which one you're talking about.

As to the article in the original post, overall I found it interesting and in line with what I have heard other CDs say. There are bits where the author gets into sexual orientation that I don't agree with, but then we as a species are still working through many questions in that area. I also have mixed feelings about the suggestions for SOs, but the author is very candid about those suggestions being formed from personal experience.

As to the use of CD and TV, I am not and never will be one to say THIS is what X means, and it ONLY means that. I have heard the terms used the way the author uses them, and I have heard them used the opposite way. As I recall, the author didn't say CD means X and TV means Y and that's all there is to it; I believe the author said that CD in this article was being used this way and TV was being used that way. You have to give them SOME meaning, and the meanings used here are not inconsistant with how some people WHO IDENTIFY AS THOSE use them. (Seriously, we have to get over this "one word, one meaning" thing we've got going.)

As to the article Peggy linked to, I largely see myself in that, but I am slowly getting to the point where I prefer to be around people (as opposed to wanting to be with people, as the article suggests). I also haven't judged the people I prefer to be with by their intelligence or other such traits but by who they are inside. Otherwise that was a good description of me.

[Ranee Daze]

Dressing for me has always been a sexual experience. There are times when I think that a big part of it all is like I am dating myself in a weird kind of lesbian love circle. Ranee likes all the things I do, she never complains about my driving, we share the same views on social issues and politics and we never complain when either of us snores. We also are perfect sexual mates.

[Lovely Rita]

I don't think anyone really knows. I know that I cross dress to express a very important part of my persona. It completes me. I am happy just as I am and do not feel the need to take it further.