The big step.

[JoanFlores]

I found the nerve to talk to the wife about my crossdressing, it went ok, she did not reject me and asked for time to get things sorted out. I have lifted a heavy load off my shoulders, I feel good but she is so, so. I have faith that we will come to a half way point, so I am not sad right now. I think that I can function both ways without to much trouble, I have confidence since we have been married for 30 yaers. If thing go a different way, than so be it, I am happy the path I have chosen.Whis me luck, I need the support so i do not get depressed, Joan

[youngn'curious]

i wish you the best of luck. This would be an extremely hard thing to do.

[Miss Petra]

Take it slow Joan. Dont over whelm her. Make sure you are hers first joanne second.

Good Luck.



Petra

[Alice B]

Did the same with my wife not long ago. After about 3 weeks she accepted my desires and it is getting better. You have made the tough step. Just be patient and don;'t push things. You will love the end result.

[Joni Beauman]

Joan,
Yes indeed, best wishes. Acceptance, if not immediate, can be a long process it seems. In my experience, you might think of this in different time scales. Tiny steps every once in a while and over a few years some progress can be made.

You sure kept it hidden well. I think like many, I got found out after about 20 years - a short, sharp, shock if your not expecting it - apparently.

I think there is the legitimate issue of deception. At least you ultimately were honest. Obviously, its a hard thing to talk about. You might try sharing some of the literature on the subject. JOni

[JoanFlores]

Thank you all for your words of encouragement, for me at the moment, I am calm, since I own 2 homes, last night I stayed in one and the wife in the other with our sons.
I told her that I would look for a good place for her to read up on crossdressing so I am going to give her this place.
For me to win-win, I would be happy for now just staying apart, that way I can dress up and have the house to myself, and in the morning return to the family house and stay the morning/afternoon, and at the end of the day in the evening to my second home, this should give her the time she needs.

[Iniquity Blonde GG]

Its not easy for both of you right now. BUT youve told your wife, and thats one of the hardest steps to make. she will be going through alot of soul searching herself right now. and needing questions answered, when she feels ready to talk to you properly about the c/d. dont rush her, just give her some time, then both of you ( if poss ) sit down and talk about it. if boundries are needed, then discuss whats accpetable to her , and what isnt :happy:
NEVER stop talking, thats key, ( as im sure many off forum will tell you ).
i wish you both the best :hugs:

[Holly]

Joan, you've taken a big step. As the others have mention proceed with slow, deliberate steps. Always bear in mind, this isn't all about you... you are in a marriage relationship and you have a partner. Respect her feelings as much (or more) as much as you desire her to respect yours and you'll be on the right track.

[Sandra]

Like most have said take it slow with her and most importantly talk to each other. I won't lie and say it's going to be a bed of roses because unless you are very lucky it's not, there's going to be ups and downs and you will just have to work through them together.

[gennee]

It's a good sign for you, Joan. Let her have time to sort it out. I told my wife last year. Though not totally accepting, she doesn't stop me from dressing. In fact we share skirts, blouses and tops. We have been married almost 27 years. I'm thankful for what we have.

Gennee

:gorgeous:

[CandyDarling]

I wish you well - I am just 10 days ahead of you as I posted here - my wife found me out. We are all in this together aren't we? !!

[JoanFlores]

Today in the morning my wife was calm and loving, we are going to have dinner tonight and she may ask questions, so I will be as honest as I can.
I hope that all goes well for use, we have been know each other for 35 years.
That you all for your support.

[Marcie Sexton]

I saw a post that gives the best advice...SLOW...baby steps first, you've taken the first of many...let it sink in, allow her time to mull thing over...

I've been through the same thing...it took time for my wife to accept Marcie, but it came with time, now she even buys for her...Give her the time and space to think, but above all be honest, you've opened the door, let her in if she want too...