I need help/ thank you

[newtothis8767]

So this is hard for me but im nineteen and ive been crossdressing for 10 years and havent told anyone and its killing me to keep the secret in so i need help plzz. I feel like a women i love spandex, nylon, lycra, tight pants, skirts, anything tight, boots, heels, heels, make up, nails, long hair, breeasts, etc but i dont have some of those and i want them see my delema is that i live with my mom and if i internet shop she will find out about me and she wont exept me for who i am. and i only have a couple of outfits and i dont go out in them but i want more outfits whats a good way to get clothing etc... being discreet. plz help


PLZ HELP THANK YOU

[cindychan]

Hmmm it sounds like your struggling with this. What makes you think your mom won't accept it? Best of luck-Cindy

[Barb Valentine]

I think a lot of we use to be in the same spot
You could tell her
Or you could just go shopping by yourself
Shopping isn't as hard as it looks
If you feel uncomfortable just tell them it's for your girlfriend
But a lot of them don't care who it's for
Good luck & keep us updated
:hugs:

[Samantha B L]

Hi there newtothis,Like Barb has mentioned just go shopping by yourself.All of the family shopping mall and department store businesses,strip malls,Wal-mart,etc. and visa versa are CD freindly and some of those places even have special training on how to satisfy and cater to the CD customers for their employees.And there are some places like wig stores,Fredericks of hollywood and Victoria's Secret that are a real treasure and have a big CD clientel.If you are nervous about going to shopping centers and shopping malls that are like 5 or 6 miles from where you live then go to the ones that are 25 miles away or like over in the next county if you have the transportation.I know what you're situation is like.But maybe,has Cindy has suggested your Mom just could accept it?But I've lived with my Mom,Sister and Nephew most of the time I've been an adult and a close family freind told me years ago that my Mom would never accept my CD'ing.She'd never disown me or deny that I'm her son but she'd think it was real freakish and odd.So,really,i just go about my business and do my usual routines and itineraries of stuff throughout my day and even though we're all 4 very close I don't feel the need to always report about every instant of my activities and actually,Mom and everybody else in my family is really comfortable with that anyway. But back to the shopping,you can just tell 'em that an item is for your girlfreind and they won't press the point.Well,Good Luck,Samantha

[Brianna Lovely]

Welcome to the forum.

First, I think you should seriously think about telling your mom. If you read many of the posts here, you'll see how much pain there's been, by keeping our lifes secret.

As far as clothes shopping goes, please consider thrift shops in your area, it will save you some money and give you a chance to explore all the styles available.

[Gina_darling]

I too am fairly new to this. I am 22 and have been crossdressing since I was young. I went shopping for outfits in public just 3 weeks ago and honestly it was not nearly as hard I was expecting. The sales assistants honestly don't notice what you're buying and if they do they don't really care. I'd just go for it if I were you ;)

As for telling your Mum, that will require a lot of courage, however she is your Mum and loves you unconditionally which is unique. So if you decide to tell her she should except it as part of you though it may take time to get used to. Just don't rush into it until you are truly ready. :hugs:

[amanda barber]

Your 19.
get a bank account, a mail drop, a debit card, even a secured credit card. buy something in person at a store.
You can sign a contract and live your life any way you want. Its the poor 17 and under kids that are trapped.

[lynn27]

So this is hard for me but im nineteen and ive been crossdressing for 10 years and havent told anyone and its killing me to keep the secret in so i need help plzz. I feel like a women i love spandex, nylon, lycra, tight pants, skirts, anything tight, boots, heels, heels, make up, nails, long hair, breeasts, etc but i dont have some of those and i want them see my delema is that i live with my mom and if i internet shop she will find out about me and she wont exept me for who i am. and i only have a couple of outfits and i dont go out in them but i want more outfits whats a good way to get clothing etc... being discreet. plz help


PLZ HELP THANK YOU

you're nineteen, maybe you should just start mixing male and female clothing and tell you mom that that is the style now and you like it. with all those wonderful girl low rider jeans out there that is where i'd start. be yourself and at some point she'll realize you like girls clothes more. of course, don't expect her to start buying you bra's next week, take your time and enjoy yourself. start sharing your thoughts with her without using the clinical or fetish words to describe who you are, start doing things like you are her daughter. Remember, Take it slow and give her time to catch up.

Outside of home, "mixed dressing" might lose you some friends but it may make it easier for you to find an accepting GF.

Good luck

[Melora]

All of the above, AND Self check out stands.. Many Wal-Marts have them, I use them.

[SANDRA MICHELLE]

It's easy to say tell your mom but in reality it is the hardest thing in the world to actually do. If it were so easy we would have all done it years ago. If I had it to do over I would have told everyone about this side of me when I was 18 and on my own, it would have made my life a whole lot easier and maybe harder as well. i do believe that it is better in the long run to control how it comes out and to explain your feelings on your own terms. You are 19 and as such you could get a locker at a club, a post office box and your own credit cards which will help keep your anonymity safe. I still say that telling your family is your best move, I think!!! Don't get married to your high school sweetheart before you tell her about your crossdressing desires, she deserves to know ahead of time, I speak from experience. If you asked everyone that is a crossdresser that is or has been married they would almost certainly all say that they wish they could have been honest upfront.
Good Luck!!!

[Wendi0012]

It wasn't until i was a few years older than u are now when I was going through this same problem. Well long story short a fiend of my parents saw me as the woman i am on night in a club a few towns over and didn't wait to see them again but insted called my parents the next day and gave them such a rousting. Needless to say this made coming out evenharder my faather took almost two years to talk with me and my mom even as accepting as she was felt let down because I didn't come and tell her first. Point is parents and family are no different than society they to have opions of there owns how ever a part of them is in you and no matter how difficult it is they will come around. Good luck keep us posted!!

[Avsblues19]

Hello,
I crossdressed for 12 years (I am 22) before I went out and bought my own lingerie. I suggest you get a UPS box. It might not be as cheap as a PO box but you can have any package sent there (a lot of places wont ship to a PO box). Once you get that box, you can have catalogs sent there. Then you can use a credit card or even money orders to purchase what you want from that catalog. Try to find some boutiques in your area and e-mail them and see if they are cd friendly. Most are friendly and some will even schedule an appointment after hours so that you can privately shop.

But sometime you need to shop in person. It is really fun. Go to a walmart that is open 24 hours and has self-checkouts. If you go in the morning there are a small amount of people there. Walmart doesn't keep their self-checkouts open during 10 p.m.-7 a.m. but if you go around 2 in the morning most employees are having lunch. If you have a meijer in your area, they keep their self-checkouts open 24/7. Fredericks of Hollywood is a very cd friendly place to shop.

[Lovely Rita]

Post office Box, UPS store. You can receive all your stuff at these places. Thats how I did it in my teens, many many moons ago.

[jennifer easton]

You know you have youth on your side, most of the sales girls will think your cute and fall all over themselvs to help you out who knows you might get lucky and find some one to share in your fun!, we girls some times feel like every one is out to turn us over to the fun police! not so! listen to your sisters, I know its easy for an old fart to say this but just take control,eas in to the local wal-mart and buy something ,the first time is the worst, it can only get better! as far as talking to your mon, this would be a good start, I know if I would have done that about 40 years ago it would have saved me so much pain and guilt that I probably would have had a whole different out look on life, h-ll I might have been the president haha!, I hope this will help in some small way

[newtothis8767]

Thabk yo uso much for your imput but i need to clarify somethings I live in a small town were i know everyone and i work at the mall so i dont want people knowing i cd just yet. Also i Dont drive so it posses a problem with the whole going to a nother town. And with my mom she almost disowned my sister cuz shes bi. Im not gay im straight but if she new i crossed she with think i was gay because well lets say when i got my ears peirced she called me gay for weeks and it hurts for ur parent to do that. This summer im going to go some were and live as a women if i can get all the clothes and stuff any suggestions were to go.

Thx again