what makes us ...

[Ellie C]

what makes us ( c/d's ) so slf centered , insular and not nice to know to others ? , answers please

[Cherry Lynn]

I do not think I am self-centered, insular or not nice.

[Sharon]

what makes us ( c/d's ) so slf centered , insular and not nice to know to others ? , answers please


Speak for yourself. I don't believe this applies to most of us.

[marie354]

what makes us ( c/d's ) so slf centered , insular and not nice to know to others ? , answers please

If I can understand what you are asking...

Everyone is a bit self-centered insomuch as we are our own person in our own little world.
BUT... We have to take into account the effect that we have on others as well, whether it be good or bad. In other words, for myself... Some people like me, some are so-so, and some absolutely hate me. I expect this in a world as diverse as ours.........

You can please some of the people all the time, and all of the people some of the time... But you can never please all of the people all of the time.

It's a big 'ol world out there with a hell of a lot of people with all kinds of different ideas for the "perfect world."

[Joy Carter]

what makes us ( c/d's ) so slf centered , insular and not nice to know to others ? , answers please

Oh no Hun ! I'm nice to everyone. As far as being into myself if that is your question. I think after all the years of denial I deserve some attention.:c9:

[sindey]

i can see where ur coming from, but its more of a personal protection attitude. A barrier which can, in its self, push people away, without listening to what they have to say! Most CD's do it, as not to face humiliation, but as a result can lead to lonlieness!

[kerrianna]

what makes us ( c/d's ) so slf centered , insular and not nice to know to others ? , answers please

Oh right, Darrell. :rolleyes: You obviously are nice, not so self centered, and soon not to be insular. I know a friend who thinks so. :love: I think so too. :hugs:

But to address the question:
What you describe sounds to me like a misunderstood person (aka moi). When you don't fit in (and let's face it, most of us think outside the box, YAY!:cheer:) you tend to feel that way. Whether we don't fit in because we're TG or CD or whether we became that way BECAUSE we don't fit in doesn't matter. We don't fit into the box. Our self image suffers because of guilt - 'people would like us if we tried harder, gave more, we clam up, hide, etc..." The reason we do this is because we know we are a bit different and we are living in a state of at least semi-confusion. We are original and unique (everybody is but lots of people are actually scared of being so, poor blighters) and may be out of step with the mainstream, but we are NOT slf centered , insular and not nice to know to others! I have NEVER met such an amazing, giving, loving, nice to know group of people as the CDs on this forum.

Nice try Darrell. Now get over there and look after Angie. :hugs:

[Daintre]

Sorry Darrell, but I really don't think that includes me, or the people I have met on this forum. I have been treated so well and in turn I have tried to spread that caring around also. :happy:

[NatalieGirl]

Darrell, I do not accept the premise of your question. Therefore, I cannot answer it.

[amanda barber]

what makes us ( c/d's ) so slf centered , insular and not nice to know to others ? , answers please

What have you done that makes you think your self centered , insular and not nice?

[tasha]

What have you done that makes you think your self centered , insular and not nice?

Exactly.....
I'm not self centered, insular and I hope I'm nice.:D

[Marcie Sexton]

I don't mean to insult you, BUT...I consider myself a kind, considerate, and most of all LOVING person...something I have just learned as I get, as we all do , get older, is learn to be tolerant and appreciated "all" things with just a bit more appreciation than you had in years past....

[Shelly Preston]

what makes us ( c/d's ) so slf centered , insular and not nice to know to others ? , answers please


I can see why you ask the question many of us for years lived in fear of exposure some still do.

Self centered - well sometimes we get caught up in wanting to dress.
If for other reasons it does not happen so we can feel as if we are a bit self centered because the plan have to dress has gone bust.
Most of us realise this will happen on occasions so do not feel self centered by realising most times other people have to come first.

Insular - For many crossdressing is something that by its nature makes people feel insular. For many they had no idea there were more of us who crossdress. Even more so in the pre-Internet days when information on the subject was very limited.
Who would you tell if you were not part of the forum ?
As we mostly have kept it a secret from our friends or family it can make us feel insular at times


Not nice to know- This is the statement I have most trouble with
The vast majority of the transgendered community are some of the nicest people you will ever meet. We are used to dealing with prejudice and are supportive of others him a situation.
We are always prepared to try and help those in trouble. We have such a diverse collection of people here there is a chance someone will have the answer to any question you care to ask. +?

We are nice people sometimes its just taking the time to get to know us:hugs: .

[GypsyKaren]

I have lots of trans friends, and I have also had the pleasure to meet quite a few members of this forum, and I can say without a doubt that trannies are the sweetest group of people there is, so I really don't know what you're talking about.

Karen

[Susan Johnson]

I can see why you ask the question many of us for years lived in fear of exposure some still do.

Self centered - well sometimes we get caught up in wanting to dress.
If for other reasons it does not happen so we can feel as if we are a bit self centered because the plan have to dress has gone bust.
Most of us realise this will happen on occasions so do not feel self centered by realising most times other people have to come first.

Insular - For many crossdressing is something that by its nature makes people feel insular. For many they had no idea there were more of us who crossdress. Even more so in the pre-Internet days when information on the subject was very limited.
Who would you tell if you were not part of the forum ?
As we mostly have kept it a secret from our friends or family it can make us feel insular at times


Not nice to know- This is the statement I have most trouble with
The vast majority of the transgendered community are some of the nicest people you will ever meet. We are used to dealing with prejudice and are supportive of others him a situation.
We are always prepared to try and help those in trouble. We have such a diverse collection of people here there is a chance someone will have the answer to any question you care to ask. +?

We are nice people sometimes its just taking the time to get to know us:hugs: .

I think you may be mistaking peoples natural reluctance to 'come out' to a world where most people either do not understand our needs or would be openly hostile if they were aware. Some people (and I am one of them) are fortunate enough to have a partner who accepts that 'This is me'. They may not understand why, but they accept that this is something we have to do. I imagine that a lot of us only ever share dressing with a partner and children and friends are probably unaware.

Susan

[Shelly Preston]

I think you may be mistaking peoples natural reluctance to 'come out' to a world where most people either do not understand our needs or would be openly hostile if they were aware. Some people (and I am one of them) are fortunate enough to have a partner who accepts that 'This is me'. They may not understand why, but they accept that this is something we have to do. I imagine that a lot of us only ever share dressing with a partner and children and friends are probably unaware.

Susan


Who would you tell if you were not part of the forum ?
This part of my answer addresses you thoughts

Yes its difficult to tell people due to the reasons you state but is that a reason for being self centered or insular
I dont believe so

[RobertaFermina]

I used to be all of those things, but that was long before I started to CrossDress! LOL!

If this is *now* true for anyone, I'd love to hear what they have to say.

As for me, now that I have lost my terror of Society's judgment and shaming of people who choose to be themselves and be different: "......I feel much better NOW!"

[tightsgirl]

what makes us ( c/d's ) so slf centered , insular and not nice to know to others ? , answers please


I'm an asshole as a man, it only seems fair that I'm a bitch as a woman.:tongueout

[Suzie S.]

I think you're just having a bad day Darrell! I don't resemble any of those remarks, and I'm a cd. I can certainly say it doesn't apply to the fine folks on this forum either! These folks here are some of the most selfless and loving people I've ever had the pleasure of meeting!

Sorry, but I have to disagree with you, unless I misunderstood your remarks.
Please cheer up! :D

[Lanore]

what makes us ( c/d's ) so slf centered , insular and not nice to know to others ? , answers please
Sorry. Cannot relate to any of the above'.

Lanore

[susie bear]

I think you are way off the mark. However in the interest of most of us would you explain why YOU feel that way?

susie bear

[Teresa Amina]

what makes us ( c/d's ) so slf centered , insular and not nice to know to others ? , answers please

Who's putting you down by saying this stuff to you?
People in general are self-centered; who'll look out for you if you don't?
Insular? Tell them to go be considered a weirdo or some sort of perv by most people and see how insular they get.
Not nice? Whoever put this in your head doesn't know any of us then. We're no less nice than any other group of self centered weirdo pervs :D

[Ellie C]

T hankyou all for your honest replies .I was feeling a bit screwed up when i put the thread on, your views have helped me imensley , perhaps im not such a bad person aftre all lol , thanks again :D

[Iniquity Blonde GG]

Who's putting you down by saying this stuff to you?
People in general are self-centered; who'll look out for you if you don't?
Insular? Tell them to go be considered a weirdo or some sort of perv by most people and see how insular they get.
Not nice? Whoever put this in your head doesn't know any of us then. We're no less nice than any other group of self centered weirdo pervs :D
actualy it was me that said this :rolleyes: ( im Darrells SO ). & at time i was so angry & infuriated at the way c/d was been blamed for alot of issues. tyring to explain been on forum was a "good" thing, and could help him achieve alot more answers to his questions that i could give !!
i was cruel i know :sad: but it was only way i could get through what i was feeling, and i have admitted to him today iam scarred of the c/d . but, been on forum is helping me alot more understand the reasons of c/d :happy:

[Kelsy]

not nice to know to others ?

Darrell Hun,

I would be honored to meet any one of the fine ladies on this site! They are all very interesting people. I do understand there are groups who might not accept us well but that doesn't mean we are not likable. At the very least we are pretty!!:heehee:

Jennifer:D

[Miss Lulu]

what makes us ( c/d's ) so slf centered , insular and not nice to know to others ? , answers please


You're just having a bad hair day. Go shopping! A new dress or pair of shoes will put you back into the spirit! Unless... you're PMSing?

LOL.

[Teresa Amina]

iam scarred of the c/d

I can see how this is all scary for you. Coming here and reading all the craziness (and contributing so well to it!:D ) it would be easy to see your loved ones' "interest" leading somewhere you don't want to go. We walk a strange path, but it leads to different places for each of us.

[kerrianna]

actualy it was me that said this :rolleyes: ( im Darrells SO ). & at time i was so angry & infuriated at the way c/d was been blamed for alot of issues. tyring to explain been on forum was a "good" thing, and could help him achieve alot more answers to his questions that i could give !!
i was cruel i know :sad: but it was only way i could get through what i was feeling, and i have admitted to him today iam scarred of the c/d . but, been on forum is helping me alot more understand the reasons of c/d :happy:

tut-tut :rolleyes: , Angie, you naughty girl. You know how sweet and nice we are here. :battingeyelashes:

You are right about Darrell looking to here for more answers. We tend to ask too much of our SO's. It'd be like if I was an engineer and I kept asking you engineering questions instead of asking other engineers. That's what we're here for - to help and support each other, and our SO's. :hugs:

I'm amazed by this group of people. We may act self-centred or confused at times, but overall I've never known such a caring kind group of people. So try not to be scared. If Darrell ever needs straightening out :devil: just send him our way. :spank: :D

[Julie York]

**** off! I'm busy!














:D

[Rachaelb64]

what makes us ( c/d's ) so slf centered , insular and not nice to know to others ? , answers please

Self Centre? - Well everyone is self-centered to a certin extent.

Insular? - It is all about control, If friend ask me to go out I go out, rather than dress. You make yourself insular. Control the cross dressing, dont let the cross dressing control you.

Not nice to know? - You can count me out on this one, I believe I'm an ok person.

Mind you being a cder can get screwy with your head and self-esteem :o

[Lovely Rita]

what makes us ( c/d's ) so slf centered , insular and not nice to know to others ? , answers please


I am not self centered but centered. I am not insular but kinder. I much nicer since I have been liberated to me. I definitely have grown in my capacity to love others more. I definitely love and appreiciate my SO even more.

It has been very positive for me and hope some day it will for you too.

[Sierra Evon]

Does not compute !!!!! :smashcomp :D