Sometimes feeling defensive

[Nicole]

Sometimes I feel defensive even around my family and friends. None of them know about me and I don't think they would understand if they did. I know they would react badly which would hurt my feelings a lot. Today I answered the phone as Karen and my cousin asked me what was wrong with my voice although it wasn't that different at all! It shows how sensitive they are to even the slightest change, and I am one really big change waiting in the wings! Sometimes I want to shut myself off from everyone I know.

It will take some time to strike a balance, I think. I am still a newbie and trying to be patient. Right now I am just exploring and being me. That is all I know to do. This must be old hat to all of you but I've never had to deal with it before, so bear with me. But overall I am happy. In fact my wife left me a surprise pair of black panties and a bra last night! I look and feel GREAT! I am so lucky and do not feel sorry for myself one bit. Just trying not to be so defensive sometimes... :GE:

[Casey Morgan]

All I can say Karen is that it gets easier over time. I know, the fear and the hurt are tough to deal with. But it's all part of the process hon. As you're being patient with your family and friends, remember to be patient with yourself too. :hugs:

[Lovely Rita]

Wow.....what a wonderful wife.

[Lisa Golightly]

Right now I am just exploring and being me. That is all I know to do.

...and that my friend is what life is all about. :)