Well it can be a fetish!!

[Robin_1616]

Whats all the hullabaloo about!! Lot's of people feel it's a fetish. Whats the difference and why is a fetish such a negative connotation in some peioples mind? Just don't understand that whole debate?

[susie evans]

it's not in my eyes it's just part of who i am and don't intend to change :heehee:

susie

[Elly]

for one fetishes are not taken seriousely by the mainstream public, and makes some people connect crossdressing with other deviant behaviors like prostitution, and cheating... now most of us here know that it rarely goes in such a negative direction as that, but once again it's public perception and the need to connect things they don't understand to things they know a little more about, often ending in convoluted results... i like to wear PVC and Vynal at clubs sometimes and often get asked if i'm into S&M, or have a master/mistress, ect, neither is true as i am happily married, since i don't try to pass and just wear womens fashions i'm often mistaken for being gay guy... it's all in how the public puts 2&2 together to come up with their results, in short fetishist make those that are legit, or lifestylist look a little worse than they are, everyone is entitled to their fetishes be it wearing a pair of the other sexes underware or autoerotic asphyxiation, but never should a fetish be mistaken for a lifestyle, which sadly is what the general public does...

[Casey Morgan]

Robin, for some crosdressing is a fetish. For some it's not. I think the problem comes when some people tell others their dressing is a fetish and vice versa. Personally, if crossdressing is a fetish for someone, that's fine with me. You do your thing, I'll do mine. But what I do isn't a fetish and I resent anyone telling me it is. I think that's really what's going on when people take offense to THEIR dressing being called a fetish. I believe there really is no debate here, or at least there shouldn't be. It's an individual thing, and so whether it's a fetish or not is up to the individual to define for themselves.

[Theresa(TGirl)]

The reason why fetishes are commonly referred to being "negative" are because they are often things that involve weird or at least un-normal sexual stuff.

Also, in a lot of people's minds, anything that is sexually related is already dirty.

[Karren H]

Me neither..... It's a hobby for me!!! Ice Hockey is my fettish!!! hehe

Love Karren

[Tamara Croft]

The reason why fetishes are commonly referred to being "negative" are because they are often things that involve weird or at least un-normal sexual stuff.
Oh dear..... un-normal?? whos to say a sexual fetish is 'un-normal' ?? sorry, but this is just ******** ..... can't think of a nice word..... so insert your own....... :rolleyes:

[Audrey34]

I have a fetish. It's bondage. I like to tie up women in blouses and skirts (and occassionally be on the receiving end while dressed). Many segments of society still look upon my thing as deviant and abnormal. But I don't care what they say. To me, crossdressing is every bit a fetish as bondage. I love them both and will not part with either. But that's just me.
-Audrey

[Michelle 51]

I don't think crossdressing is a fetish but i think article's of clothing we wear can be.I love underwear, hose and heel's.I dress fully but those article's are a must.go figure Justabit

[Kate Simmons]

Labels again? Tell you what, call me a turnip. We're all here because we are interested in some form of crossdressing and that's good enough for me folks.;) :battingeyelashes:

[Dragster]

Like you Audrey, I'm turned on by bondage as well as CD. I have tried it on my wife a few times, and at the time, I could tell she really enjoyed it, but in the cold light of day, was not sure that she wanted to try it again. Strangely, her attitude to bondage was nowhere near so negative as her attitude to CDing. I'll never understand her!!

Tony

[SandyR]

CD'ing is a part of me! Fast cars, model airplanes, and maybe heels, is a fetish....


Kisses...

SandyR

[Tiffany Tuesday]

Whats all the hullabaloo about!! Lot's of people feel it's a fetish. Whats the difference and why is a fetish such a negative connotation in some peioples mind? Just don't understand that whole debate?
Honey,
there is nothing in itself wrong with a fetish to crossdress but it is a different urge to those who feel trapped in the wrong body or gender and need release by assuming the opposite gender role for a little or a lifetime.

Neither group has any right to denigrate the other but please understand some dress from an admiration for femininity whilst others think it a sexually arousing humiliation. For those who admire femininity, it is repulsive to see it abused for entertainment by either gender!

[marie354]

Labels again? Tell you what, call me a turnip. We're all here because we are interested in some form of crossdressing and that's good enough for me folks.;) :battingeyelashes:

How about a fruit? I think I'm a bit fruity at times. Especially when I think about what I'd look in a itty-bitty, teeny-weeny, yellow pokadot bikini.
TeeHeeHee.....

[Eva Diva]

I just wrote a long response, and then deleted it for fear that someone somewhere would be offended, in spite of my best efforts. These things happen. Let me just say that for me, personally, my dressing is what I consider to be a fetish pleasure. I assume that others share this with me, but I do not generalize my experience to crossdressers as a whole. In fact, I firmly believe that to be incorrect. Many of you seem to take no fetish pleasure whatsoever from dressing. We share the outcome - dressing - but not the motivation. seems to me that there's room for both - or all - of us in the CD community. :hugs:

[Rachel Morley]

For me, I have a strong feminine side to my personality and so I feel like I'm never really in "male mode" ....just degrees of femme-ness (if that’s a word).

I'm always wearing something girly and I don't consider my dressing a "hobby" or a "fetish" certainly it's not something that I might do with the frequency of say, swimming, or cycling, or playing golf or whatever. My dressing is a integral part of my personality that is always there . I just sometimes choose not to express it so forcefully (en femme) and sometimes it shows up more subtlety (dressed as a slightly feminized male)....but it's always there in some form and people can usually tell...... fetish?.... no, not as far as I'm concerned.

[Vicky_Scot]

Whats all the hullabaloo about!! Lot's of people feel it's a fetish. Whats the difference and why is a fetish such a negative connotation in some peioples mind? Just don't understand that whole debate?

I think you will find that the people who feel it is a fetish is very few within the crossdressing community.

I for one do not agree that it is a fetish or hobby. It is part of who I am and was determined in the womb. Not a lot I can do about it.

[jayseedee]

Whats all the hullabaloo about!! Lot's of people feel it's a fetish. Whats the difference and why is a fetish such a negative connotation in some peioples mind? Just don't understand that whole debate?

I seem to have started this discussion in my thread (which was stopped as I was deemed insulting). All I really wanted to know was why so many of us who do derive (among other things) sexual pleasure from cross-dressing, find it so difficult to accept the word fetish. I know that this is not the motive of many on this group and I did not accuse anyone or imply anything, we all have our own reasons and many have posted them here. There does however seem to be confusion over many of the terms used and an almost desperate need to explain ourselves to one another. Perhaps someone could start a glossary on here so we all know what another person really means. Perhaps we could even agree to use the Oxford English Dictionary definitions as they are considered to be the “true” meanings of our English words. Furthermore I would like to point out to those who think us fetishists are a minority group the sparse statistics available do not bear this out. I do hope that this time I don't upset anyone.

[jayseedee]

I just wrote a long response, and then deleted it for fear that someone somewhere would be offended, in spite of my best efforts. These things happen. Let me just say that for me, personally, my dressing is what I consider to be a fetish pleasure. I assume that others share this with me, but I do not generalize my experience to crossdressers as a whole. In fact, I firmly believe that to be incorrect. Many of you seem to take no fetish pleasure whatsoever from dressing. We share the outcome - dressing - but not the motivation. seems to me that there's room for both - or all - of us in the CD community. :hugs:

I wish I'd said this!

[Casey Morgan]

I just wrote a long response, and then deleted it for fear that someone somewhere would be offended, in spite of my best efforts.

There are a couple of pair of nomex undies around here you can borrow if you decide to post what you had originally written. Some people may take offense, but from what you've posted it sounds like that would be more a case of them taking offense where none was intended. I'd definitely be interested in reading it. I have some understanding of what CDing is like for those for whom it's a fetish (I'm trying to choose my words carefully) but I'd love to get a better understanding of it.


Furthermore I would like to point out to those who think us fetishists are a minority group the sparse statistics available do not bear this out.

I've never seen any statistics that break down the community into the various groups. Can you post some, or do you have any links?

[Eva Diva]

There are a couple of pair of nomex undies around here you can borrow if you decide to post what you had originally written. Some people may take offense, but from what you've posted it sounds like that would be more a case of them taking offense where none was intended. I'd definitely be interested in reading it.


My late dad - bless his soul - told me many years ago that you should never talk religion with people. No matter how hard you try to be careful to not offend, someone will take offense, and once they do, there's nothing you can do to turn them around. Funny how smart dads can be! I've made it into a general rule on hot-button issues, although I'm a person with strong beliefs, and a big mouth. :D In this case, I just pulled it back a bit and tippie-toe'd.

The original copy was deleted late last night, so it's long gone.

[Robin_1616]

Well I started this thread basically asking was why "jayseedee's" original thread got bumped. I guess I learned that some people are REALLY sensitive about this issue. Never knew this was the case at all. I guess I'll have to watch what I say to other CD's while I'm out and about so as not to offend anyone.hmmmm wouldn't have all thought that was the case and would have thought this segment would be much more open minded and carefree?

[Danigyrl29]

I recently took a very long course for my employer which included several weeks of schooling in psychology. We discussed all aspects to include fetishes. The instructor discussed travestism and transvestic fetish. There is a difference apparently. Transvestism is the "lower" level of the two. Considered to be "less serious". I remember the instructor, a board certified psychologist, laughing about how he could not imagine why you would want to wear women's clothing. I just wanted to shout, "don't knock it until you try it!"

There are two key criteria before a psychiatric diagnosis of "transvestic fetishism" is made:

1. recurrent, intense sexually arousing fantasies, urges, or behaviour, involving cross-dressing

2. clinically significant distress or impairment, whether socially, at work, or elsewhere

Thus, transvestism is not considered a mental illness unless it causes significant problems for the transvestite concerned.

Just some info I had. I admit that I didn't read the other posts, so I apologize if I have repeated any info.

[Eva Diva]

I'd trust a psychologist as far as I could throw one - in stilettos. :D

Really, someone makes up a story, and when enough of them agree with him/her, it goes in a big book and becomes official.

[Cheyenne Skye]

In my opinion, crossdressing is not in itself a fetish. A fetish is more of an obsession over a particular thing whether it be a particular body part(foot fetish), a certain type of material used for clothing (latex or leather) or some action (spanking, tying someone up). I prefer to crossdress most of the time (femme drab so to speak), but I do on occasion like to air out my fetish for latex and leather clothing. I could just as easily buy these types of things in a male cut or style but as with the rest of my wardrobe, I prefer the feminine styles more.

[Julie York]

I seem to have started this discussion in my thread (which was stopped as I was deemed insulting). All I really wanted to know was why so many of us who do derive (among other things) sexual pleasure from cross-dressing, find it so difficult to accept the word fetish. I know that this is not the motive of many on this group and I did not accuse anyone or imply anything, we all have our own reasons and many have posted them here. There does however seem to be confusion over many of the terms used and an almost desperate need to explain ourselves to one another. Perhaps someone could start a glossary on here so we all know what another person really means. Perhaps we could even agree to use the Oxford English Dictionary definitions as they are considered to be the “true” meanings of our English words. Furthermore I would like to point out to those who think us fetishists are a minority group the sparse statistics available do not bear this out. I do hope that this time I don't upset anyone.

I think you had a good point and I've learned from your original thread so it was not wasted. I think it is that the 'act' of being a guy who likes wearing women's clothing has a wide range of motivations. The easiest explanation for oneself (and others) is "well it's just this fetish thing I have". And for many it is! But because the motivation for doing it spans so far it starts to cross the boundaries of lifestyle and transgender, and so to simplify it as a "fetish" is hurtful to those who see it as a bigger part of their personality than a sexual thrill.

I think that's where you got stung with your thread (as it were) but also why your original thread was very informative. But it doesn't invalidate what you said just because there are areas of crossdressing that are more 'serious' than others.
There are thousands of fetish phone lines. There is fictionmania, there are a million websites. They are not doing it because they are health workers.

[Tamara Croft]

Lots of things can be a fetish, you should try educating yourselves on the word....

Fetish (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Fetish)

[KristyCD]

I certainly thought crossdressing was a fetish for me. But now that I looked up the definition I can safely say I am confused. :happy:


fetish
One entry found for fetish.
Main Entry: fe·tish
Variant(s): also fe·tich /'fe-tish also 'fE-/
Function: noun
Etymology: French & Portuguese; French fétiche, from Portuguese feitiço, from feitiço artificial, false, from Latin facticius factitious
1 a : an object (as a small stone carving of an animal) believed to have magical power to protect or aid its owner; broadly : a material object regarded with superstitious or extravagant trust or reverence b : an object of irrational reverence or obsessive devotion : PREPOSSESSION c : an object or bodily part whose real or fantasied presence is psychologically necessary for sexual gratification and that is an object of fixation to the extent that it may interfere with complete sexual expression
2 : a rite or cult of fetish worshipers
3 : FIXATION

[Joy Carter]

Robin, for some crosdressing is a fetish. For some it's not. I think the problem comes when some people tell others their dressing is a fetish and vice versa. Personally, if crossdressing is a fetish for someone, that's fine with me. You do your thing, I'll do mine. But what I do isn't a fetish and I resent anyone telling me it is. I think that's really what's going on when people take offense to THEIR dressing being called a fetish. I believe there really is no debate here, or at least there shouldn't be. It's an individual thing, and so whether it's a fetish or not is up to the individual to define for themselves.

Couldn't have said it better myself.:D

[jayseedee]

Lots of things can be a fetish, you should try educating yourselves on the word....

Fetish (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Fetish)

I'm glad you said this, I'm sure I would have been shot down in flames. Though it must be remebered that wikipedia is not the definative aurthority on English. The word's origin is from French fétiche, from Latin facticius ‘made by art’, which I don't think anybody could object to

[Lovely Rita]

fetish, impulse, way of life, whatever it is I LOVE IT!!!!!!!!!!