Weakest link?

[Kate Simmons]

There always seems to be a lot of concern about "passing" by different ones and the necessity to do that seems important. I used to worry about it but am mellower nowadays and just try to be myself most of the time, feminine expression notwithstanding.
I was wondering what some would consider their weakest point in their attempt to "pass" and what do you think you could do to improve your chances of success? I've changed a number of things over the years such as the way I highlight my eyes, the way I style my wigs, how my hair goes with my outfits, the way I talk(not how I sound) and the things I talk about. I've also become a friendlier person overall and realize the value of getting to know others which seems to attract others to me.
Since this Forum is sort of a co-op and we support each other, I thought it would be interesting to throw this question out and see what happens, since we are basically a family here and care for one another. This question is open to absolutely everyone.:happy:

[Sally24]

Right now my weakest link is my voice. I do raise it a bit so it is not automatically masculine, but so far have not had too much luck with the female patterns of speech. My wife says that the only off looks I ever get now are after I have started talking. I practice off and on in the car but I've got to buckle down and spend some real time at this soon!

Sally

[TxKimberly]

Voice and beard shadow.
Kim

[Kali]

My beard is a definite issue; perhaps a veil? ;)

[Helen in OK]

My biggest problem is my size. While I am not the biggest girl here, at 5'14" and now 200+ lbs, I stand out in any crowd of GGs. Unfortunately there are not too many GGs my age with my height, sigh.

Helen in OK

[Teresa Amina]

Matching hair color where it shows under the wig. Just can't quite get it right. The greys in front of the ears don't take the dye well.

[Carroll]

for me I would have to say my wig. I dont really have the money for a really good one

[SandyR]

My Height and left ancle makes it tough to walk in heels, but that may be a good things since it forces me to wear low hells in public......hehehe.

Its all good!

SandyR

[Daintre]

There are 2 things that are a curse, first is my overall size and second is the walker I need to move around.

[ColleenCD]

The 6'2" thing is a passing issue.

Colleen

[ArleneRaquel]

If one is already a perfect " 10 " ,how can one have a weak link ? :love: & :hugs: Trina - Vain CD'er

[Stephenie S]

Voice, Beard, Size (hands, feet, shoulders), No butt, MPB, God, I could go on and on!

But you did ask for one thing. Subjectively, I would have to say "voice". Others may say something else. I think that if a convincing female sounding voice came out of my mouth when I spoke, lots of other problems could and would be overlooked. Just MHO.

Lovies,
Steph

[Amy Hepker]

Loose weight

[marie354]

Voice and beard shadow.
Kim

My beard always has been an issue. I can get it baby soft, but within a few hours, it's sandpaper, a few more and it's visable with out any makeup, after about 6 hours it shows through any makeup.

I'm working on Karren's theory of softening my voice, and ever-so slightly raising the pitch. My SO says that at times it sounds pretty good. I just need to get to the point that I can turn the perfect voice on at will withought too much thought.

She says that my manerisms and walk have progressed well.

More practice, practice, practice. TeeHeeHee.

[Wenda]

My height, 6'1"+, my fairly strong chin. With diligence, I can make the voice work. A suggestion to some of the others who are not satisfied with their voice, Pick a persona, probably someone with a slightly different accent, practice while driving, or alone, and leave yourself voice mail messages (if you have secure voice mail). Don't work on it too long at one time, but work on it every day. Your femme voice (or voices are) is there, you just need to locate it and then strengthen it. w.

[AmberTG]

With me, everything! I've never tried to pass in public, too much stuff for this poor girl to buy to be able to attempt to pass. The heavy makeup concealer, the hip pads, etc. I need to save the money for my electrolysis sessions. Eventually, I won't need to cover the beard, it won't be there.
I go every day with mostly women's clothing so that's no big deal. My adam's apple kinda sticks out and I have big hands, but those things aren't as difficult if the face is presentable. I need a good wig also, I'm missing a bit of hair and would have to hide that fact.
I must say, I did pretty good at halloween, most people didn't recognize me in the black wig and the goth dress.

[aka.laura]

the beard definitely. allthough the problem 's not that big. When we (my wife and I) go out I sort of half-dress (fem jenas, blouse, elegant shoes/boots, discreet makeup). I never got any remarks or funny looks, people probably think I'm kinda "queer" (when they think anything at all). Holland (my native country) is very tolerant about it, Germany too (we live next door), switzerland (where we live): I wouldn't dare :eek:

[Kate Simmons]

The reason I posed this questiuon was to point out that we may feel we have some weak points but it ain't necessarily so. Our interactions with others and our confidence in ourselves are the main things. IMO, everyone here is beautiful despite our supposed flaws. Who we are as people makes all the difference and that is where our real beauty comes from and that is what others relate to. I have gone out in the past at times when I thought I looked terrible yet always received compliments and I would think to myself:"What are they, blind?" What I came to realize is that they were talking about me as an overall person and that is who they related to. It's really about 5% appearance and 95% personality most of the time and others will appreciate you for who you are. I gave up a long time ago on the "impossible dream" of being a physical beauty because there is no such thing, whether we are a man or a woman. We can be the most beautiful person in the world and have the personality of a cactus. We can accentuate the positive and minimize the negative as far as perceived flaws go, but the main thing is our resolve and our confidence to be ourselves no matter what we look like. That is what people relate to and that is what will always give us success. This has been my experience anyway.:happy:

[Lovely Rita]

Like you passing is not my thing.

[silkie h]

Voice & a dimple on my chin. I am very conscious of both.

[MJ]

oh god were do i start, voice , size , looks etc ,etc ,etc

[RobertaFermina]

My weakest link is attitude.

If I am fearful, or judging of others, I don't connect and judge myself (and expect others to judge me) to the third degree.

When I am accepting and curious and looking for ways to connect and enjoy the moment - I know that it doesn't matter if I pass inspection - I will pass into acceptance, and indeed, become a interesting stranger, or desired client, acquaintance, or friend !

My weakest physical link (If I must pass the third degree inspection):
Broad Shoulders and Muscular Arms. I am so big upstairs that I would have to wear C or D Cup Breasts to be geometrically balanced.
I refuse to venture beyond a B Cup - Not ready to buy a bigger set of Breast Forms.


:rose: Roberta :rose:

[Sherlyn]

My view here Salandra is ..... I use to criticize every little flaw I had and thought ..wow how will I ever pass ...sometimes my shadow appeared darker..and.. it was always just me thinking that ...in this thread I see lots of concern about things like this .. really think about it.. we criticize every little thing thats not female about us... to a point where we amplify our own I dont pass feelings ...when you are out and see woman ...do you actual look to see if shes got big arms ...facial shadows ..etc etc I dont.. I just see the whole picture and as long as this person is just doing her thing and belonging nothing seems out of place ...So my weakest link was (and is still a bit there at times ).."dont dwell on my flaws".."Always look at.. and reflect from the inside... My Whole Picture" ..a good friend set me on these ideals

[GypsyKaren]

To me, worrying about "passing", whatever that is, is like worrying about imperfection of some sort, which is a waste of time and energy. There's always going to be something we'd like to change, GGs included, so I just play the hand I was dealt and go out and have fun. Of course, there's nothing wrong with stashing an ace up your sleeve...

Karen

[Siobhan Marie]

To me, worrying about "passing", whatever that is, is like worrying about imperfection of some sort, which is a waste of time and energy. There's always going to be something we'd like to change, GGs included, so I just play the hand I was dealt and go out and have fun. Of course, there's nothing wrong with stashing an ace up your sleeve...

I totally agree with Karen . When I eventually get to go full time, my intention is get out there, enjoy it, live my life and to hell with everyone else.

:hugs: Anna Marie x

[insearchofme]

My weakest link? Lets see.... 6"2 225lbs, muscular, hands, neck (17 1/2), voice.

Beard isn't much of factor since it's coming in white. I've been told by GGs that I have great legs though.

[Elly]

for me it would be beard shadow, i have really dark black hair that shows through the skin easily, and that definable square jaw, both will eventualy be taken care of through Electrolysis and Facial Feminization Surgery, when time and money permit... as for now i don't focus on passing but still wear nothing but female clothing except when i feel really bad like, this week before having my wisdom teeth pulled, that was a pain that put me in a mindframe that i didn't care about looking good, just jeans and t-shirts for a few days, now that that's over it's back to my normal female clothes...