Sheri 4242
03-25-2007, 02:30 AM
I think many of us are impressed with how earnest AJ_GG and Nathan/Natasha have been in seeking to learn, communicate, and try and work through the issues surrounding CDing. All of us can appreciate that it is healthy for them to address this prior to marriage!
I would like to correct a misconseption that I noticed in some of the replies to one of AJ's questions -- and I'd like to do so with the hopes that I won't make anyone mad or start any arguments. Attribute this to the professor in me -- teaching and scholarship are not only a part of me, they are something for which I tend to get really OCD!
In answering some of AJ's questions, several people who are CD's said that they weren't TG. Without doubt, the definition of the word "transgendered" seems to be in debate. Therefore, it can be asserted that there is not a precise definition for the word. Often, the meaning of TG depends on who you are talking to, which is unfortunate when we are all attempting to help answer AJ's questions -- the fate of her future with her fiance hangs in the balance of what she learns and, from there, what she can tolerate and/or accept.
I "think" some CDs who said they were not TG were really saying they were not TS. Even within the loosest of definitions, a CD is TG, as is a TV, and as is a TS. "Transgender" is the state of one's "gender identity" and not their sexual orientation. Moreover, TG is aptly applied to where there is ambiguity regarding conventional notions of male and female, or non-conformity to those notions, or moving between the two, sexual orientation notwithstanding.
Not that the following will come as something new to most everybody here, but for the sake of AJ: a transexual (TS) is somebody who believes they were born into the wrong body -- or better put, born the wrong gender. Some will transition through SRS, many will not. It is a common fear many SOs have that their CD may want this someday, but any CD who is honest knows the difference and knows if they fall in this category.
The confusion lies in the fact that TS's do cross dress. BUT, the "m-t-f" CD that is most often refered to here is a heterosexual male who has a duality to their personality -- or an inner dichotomy to their very being, if you will. CD's, such as myself, feel we have a definite male personna and a definite female personna. Another way of putting this is that we feel we have a male side to our being and a female side to our being. "Crossdressing" is the outward, visible expression of the female part of our inner being.
Science has increasing evidence that a CD's mindset is of biological (genetical/hormonal) origin -- there is evidence that, in no small part, the hormone bath received as a fetus plays a major role in this. More recent evidence shows this biological evidence through brain scans. You will hear many CD's say that their CDing isn't something they can just stop or make go away. Well, with physiology, genetics, and hormones all playing a role, is it any wonder why CDing is something that is "hard wired" into our very beings?!!!
((( "Sex chromosomes control sex hormones that bathe the fetal brain and influence its wiring. Recent research confirms male-female differences during development in brain areas with abundant sex hormone receptors." (Cahill, 2005) Simple glandular malfunction during this time has been shown to cause genetic, physiological, and male-female brain wiring patterns. The hormones do not reverse gender identity, but they affect gender behavioral differences. )))
For a long time now, most m-t-f heterosexual CDs have not liked to be labeled transvestites. I was among those who didn't like the term. But, there are some very fine lines in some definitions, and I am now starting to wonder if TV isn't more apropos since it more clearly defines one of the reasons why one crossdresses. There are many who cross dress: heterosexual males who have the mindset explained above, TS's, drag queens, female impersonators, and some male prostitutes. So, it is easy to see why there is some confusion. Probably the biggest myth is that CDs are gay -- but this flies in the face of the fact that most gay men prefer men and not a male emulating a female; that is their mindset. SO's often worry about their husbands or bf's being gay when they find out about the CDing, so hopefuly this latter point will help ease that problem.
Well, I have rambled on too long. IMO, a crossdresser is "transgendered" -- whether dressed or not -- b/c it is a biological state of mind, not current attire. Basically, a transgendered individual has characteristics normally associated with a particular gender, but identify elsewhere on the gender continuum.
I hope this helps -- and again, I hope I haven't offended anyone or made anyone upset.
I would like to correct a misconseption that I noticed in some of the replies to one of AJ's questions -- and I'd like to do so with the hopes that I won't make anyone mad or start any arguments. Attribute this to the professor in me -- teaching and scholarship are not only a part of me, they are something for which I tend to get really OCD!
In answering some of AJ's questions, several people who are CD's said that they weren't TG. Without doubt, the definition of the word "transgendered" seems to be in debate. Therefore, it can be asserted that there is not a precise definition for the word. Often, the meaning of TG depends on who you are talking to, which is unfortunate when we are all attempting to help answer AJ's questions -- the fate of her future with her fiance hangs in the balance of what she learns and, from there, what she can tolerate and/or accept.
I "think" some CDs who said they were not TG were really saying they were not TS. Even within the loosest of definitions, a CD is TG, as is a TV, and as is a TS. "Transgender" is the state of one's "gender identity" and not their sexual orientation. Moreover, TG is aptly applied to where there is ambiguity regarding conventional notions of male and female, or non-conformity to those notions, or moving between the two, sexual orientation notwithstanding.
Not that the following will come as something new to most everybody here, but for the sake of AJ: a transexual (TS) is somebody who believes they were born into the wrong body -- or better put, born the wrong gender. Some will transition through SRS, many will not. It is a common fear many SOs have that their CD may want this someday, but any CD who is honest knows the difference and knows if they fall in this category.
The confusion lies in the fact that TS's do cross dress. BUT, the "m-t-f" CD that is most often refered to here is a heterosexual male who has a duality to their personality -- or an inner dichotomy to their very being, if you will. CD's, such as myself, feel we have a definite male personna and a definite female personna. Another way of putting this is that we feel we have a male side to our being and a female side to our being. "Crossdressing" is the outward, visible expression of the female part of our inner being.
Science has increasing evidence that a CD's mindset is of biological (genetical/hormonal) origin -- there is evidence that, in no small part, the hormone bath received as a fetus plays a major role in this. More recent evidence shows this biological evidence through brain scans. You will hear many CD's say that their CDing isn't something they can just stop or make go away. Well, with physiology, genetics, and hormones all playing a role, is it any wonder why CDing is something that is "hard wired" into our very beings?!!!
((( "Sex chromosomes control sex hormones that bathe the fetal brain and influence its wiring. Recent research confirms male-female differences during development in brain areas with abundant sex hormone receptors." (Cahill, 2005) Simple glandular malfunction during this time has been shown to cause genetic, physiological, and male-female brain wiring patterns. The hormones do not reverse gender identity, but they affect gender behavioral differences. )))
For a long time now, most m-t-f heterosexual CDs have not liked to be labeled transvestites. I was among those who didn't like the term. But, there are some very fine lines in some definitions, and I am now starting to wonder if TV isn't more apropos since it more clearly defines one of the reasons why one crossdresses. There are many who cross dress: heterosexual males who have the mindset explained above, TS's, drag queens, female impersonators, and some male prostitutes. So, it is easy to see why there is some confusion. Probably the biggest myth is that CDs are gay -- but this flies in the face of the fact that most gay men prefer men and not a male emulating a female; that is their mindset. SO's often worry about their husbands or bf's being gay when they find out about the CDing, so hopefuly this latter point will help ease that problem.
Well, I have rambled on too long. IMO, a crossdresser is "transgendered" -- whether dressed or not -- b/c it is a biological state of mind, not current attire. Basically, a transgendered individual has characteristics normally associated with a particular gender, but identify elsewhere on the gender continuum.
I hope this helps -- and again, I hope I haven't offended anyone or made anyone upset.