The adventure is becoming the norm

[TxKimberly]

So some of you may have caught on by now that I travel a lot for work, and in the last 4 to 6 months I've started going out while on the road. The last two months has been a delightful blur of a makeover, new look, new confidence, and a series of outings.
This last week and weekend, I spent in Indianapolis where I met with a local group and a few TGirls, one of which I hit it off very well with. A real nice person named Gina.
This time I decided I was going to go see a movie. I've tried this before but have always chickened out, sometimes right at the door, but this time I went through with it!
As I mentioned on another post, on my way out of the hotel I found the exit blocked by about half a dozen folks that were chatting. I made my way through them and didn't notice anyone taking a second looks until a woman gave me a sincere smile and said "those are CUTE shoes"! I smiled back and said "Thank you!" and kept on walking! Not sure if she made me or not and I guess it doesn't matter.
I was so nervous my legs and hands were shaking, but I stood in the line, ordered the tickets, stood in the concession line with a group of teenage girls around me (this is one of my personal fears), ordered my candy and coke, and I watched the darn movie! I watched "The last Mimzy" and thoroughly enjoyed myself.
It strikes me later, that what started out as a series of adventures a couple of months ago, is now becoming almost normal. Part of me appreciates this, and part of me wonders if this is a really a good thing? I think the thrill and the excitement of cross dressing, is a large part of the pull to do it. If it becomes the norm, and that thrill is not there anymore, will I still want to do it? Hmmm . . .
Kim

[Ammdi]

Kim,
Only you can answer that question.
I for know that it goes in cycles, and the meaning can change after time.
Sometimes the excitement level changes, that's what indicates a downturn swing for me. But it's usually not too long before I'm back at it again.
I used to live in your area, I miss Rudy's, and yer hot.

[JenniferR771]

Good for you Kim--another milestone. Way ahead of me. Don't worry about it--the urges seem to come and go--if i get bored--I find that in a few days I am ready for another new outfit or wanting to get another makeover. That intense fear is not there as much as my first time out, of course.
Odd--I think it is a macho thing--always wanting to go farther--faster--bolder--more perfect than last time--I keep daring myself.
Just think of the gurls that weigh over 200 pounds--they are easier to read. If you like the thrill, try it without makeup.
Try flying en-femme.

[danielle_from_cal]

...If it becomes the norm, and that thrill is not there anymore, will I still want to do it? Hmmm . . .
Kim

It sounds like you had fun. Your smiley face in your photos is contagious. Don't worry abuout going out dressed up en femme "becoming the norm". Being alive never grows old. You are you and it will always be enjoyable.

[krisla]

Kim I am not as far along as you but I can already see that beginning to happen. About 4 years ago I had a week by myself at home and I went out to Starbucks and a couple of movies by the end of the week I was comfortable, Since then I only dressed and went out occasionally, and I lost my confidence. About 4 months ago, when I meet some girls on this forum and went to a Tri-Ess meeting. I have now rebuilt my confidence and progressed to shopping en-fem. Although it is still exciting I can see that it may become normal. But I'm thinking normal probably isn't bad, in fact I wish I could be a normal girl, maybe not 24/7 since I like you have a family. If once a week I can be a normal women I would feel lucky.

Thanks for all your posts, the truck incident makes the things I have run into dressed, minor in comparision, you handled it well.

Krisla

[sandra-leigh]

If it becomes the norm, and that thrill is not there anymore, will I still want to do it?

I suspect you will find yourself incorporating femme clothes into "everyday life".
For example, I have womens stretch denim pants that are now a regular part of my wardrobe. The yellow ones are not a colour that is sold for mens pants, but there is no reason why it couldn't be (it isn't a "girly" yellow), so no-one notices.
I have a number of womens tops that are ambiguous, or perhaps a little feminine but not subtly so. Even some blouses that would be "obviously" womens' when worn with forms underneath, might go without comments when worn in "guy mode", but that would depend a lot on context -- you wouldn't wear necessarily wear it while out with your guy friends, but it might do just fine when you are going out shopping or to the bookstore or out to eat and so on. Sort of like, "I've never seen a shirt like that before, but a guy is wearing it so it must be a guy's shirt, so that's OK".

Now, there are other things that even men would immediately notice as being "womens' clothes" -- things like dresses are dead give-aways -- but "works in guy mode or not" calls for subtle judgement.
For example I have a womens top that is all browns and oranges and gold with large-scale flowers and doesn't look like any mens top that you've ever seen, but it isn't cut low or otherwise shaped as "feminine" so I can (and do) get away with wearing it as a guy. Somehow when I bought it I knew I could get away with it, so I left it hanging in our shared closet, and when my wife saw it, she immediately said, "That's nice!" and I knew I'd gotten away with it (I haven't told my wife about my dressing.)

Beyond the clothes: you might also find yourself incorporating bra and moderate forms (say B or C) into your public appearance. Again maybe not when you are with your guy friends, but if you aren't wearing a stretch top or blouse, people tend not to notice the curve of a B or C form -- with material that drapes, you just look a slightly stouter instead of looking like you have breasts.

The thing about incorperating femme clothes (and possibly moderate forms) into your typical public wardrobe (and perhaps into your work wardrobe too if you aren't a suit-and-tie worker), is that it will just feel natural to wear such things, and your guy clothes will start to feel... stale. I have a lot of guy clothes, and a lot of it just isn't interesting anymore, such as most of my plaid shirts; they had their day. And that process of clothes no longer feeling like the right clothes happens even to "regular" guys -- it's just that for you, the clothes that will become the "go to" clothes that feel right to choose from when you are in "drab", may well become a mix of ambiguous clothing bought from Womens, and "lightly femme" clothing that some women might notice but people aren't going to bother you over.

So yes, you are right, it might not feel like an adventure anymore to "get away with" wearing borderline clothes... it will just start feeling like those are the right clothes to wear all the time. The femme will no longer be something apart from "your life" and will becoming what your life is usually.

[Diana West]

Life is an adventure. And that never gets dull.
To say that the newness is wearing off would be that you'd stop participating in this forum. I believe you've merely incorporated it into your life.
There's that old adage of being able to eat chocolate 24/7 and how it would become a curse after a while.
That's why I like to change back and forth. I truly enjoy the variety and it keeps life exciting for me.
For me, it never gets dull. It's just my waredrobe that gets stale.

[Charleen]

Once we start seeing that most of our fears are unfounded, yes the thrill goes. For me that just means being able to be me. I dress adrogynously at all times. When not at work, like any other GG on a day off, jeans blouse, sneaks ect. It's who I am.
It also helps to flip the switch to the "I don't give a sh*t" position for those rare times you get "the look".
Enjoy your new found freedom!
Love and xxxx, Lily

[Karren H]

The way I look at it Kim, there is always something to do enfemme that is new or different... And yes the adventures become normal but non-the-less always fun... So don't worry about the thrill wearing off... Hasn't for me and I seriously doubt it will anytime soon!!

Sooo... What ya doing for an oncore?? Skydiving enfemme..... Running the Boston marathon enfemme? Bike touring, hiking, flying, subway, museums, zoo, sporting events, concerts, parades, rodeo!!!!!! ........ Class reunion enfemme?? Hehe.

I'm not telling my plans.....

:D

Love Karren

[CharleneCD]

How about replacing "the thrill" with the joy of being able to function and express yourself as a female in society. For me the thrill has always been good, but I do it more just to be able to be my feminine side.

[Marcie Sexton]

For some of the girls it may be the need for a thrill, personally speaking, being accepted as a woman is exactly what I desire, a norm for a want a be gg

[Ashley1]

Don't worry Kim, the thrill will always come back!:hugs:
:love:
Ashley

[Michelle (Oz)]

Just think of the gurls that weigh over 200 pounds--they are easier to read. If you like the thrill, try it without makeup.
Try flying en-femme.

I have been able to dress en femme a day or so a week when travelling for over 6 months and I still enjoy every second. Earlier this week enjoyed a ride on a crouded Sydney Manly Ferry (yes, on reflection a funny choice of destination). I still look forward to the next opportunity.

Flying en femme is something I've contemplated. Has anyone flown en femme in Australia?

Michelle (Oz)

[vbcdgrl]

Hi, Kimberly. I guess, when you think about it, the strangest part of your trip to the movies is this foxy chick going by herself, unescorted. But, I understand what you're saying, you've kinda conquered this Cding thing, what's next?

Vikki

[Dixie]

Bravo:bighug:

[Kenix]

Kim, maybe you are so involved with dressing up lately (and very successfully) that the thrill is gone. Taking a break will bring the excitement and desire back.:happy:

[susie evans]

kim it has become very normal but i enjoy every moment i just don't get as nervous as i used to and every time out is a new adventure :D

susie

[TxKimberly]

. . . museums and concerts, because I HAVE been considering both! LOL
I've never been to the Pops or anything like that, boy or girl mode, and I'd LOVE to!

It occurs to me that my post was misleading. I have not lost the thrill, it was more idle curiosity wondering if I WILL loose it as I become more and more comfortable with being out and accepted.
For example, walking through the group blocking the door did not intimidate as it once would have, but going to the movies was a real heart stopper while standing in line.
Kim



The way I look at it Kim, there is always something to do enfemme that is new or different... And yes the adventures become normal but non-the-less always fun... So don't worry about the thrill wearing off... Hasn't for me and I seriously doubt it will anytime soon!!

Sooo... What ya doing for an oncore?? Skydiving enfemme..... Running the Boston marathon enfemme? Bike touring, hiking, flying, subway, museums, zoo, sporting events, concerts, parades, rodeo!!!!!! ........ Class reunion enfemme?? Hehe.

I'm not telling my plans.....

:D

Love Karren

[Carin]

:clap:
Way to go Kim.
As it becomes more 'normal' you can enjoy what else life has to offer, comfortable in you own skin (and clothes)

[RachelDenise]

Kim, there is always something new to try while en femme. I think you are very brave and a great example to all of us.

[Sally24]

Still thrilling for me after going out off and on for most of the last 2 years. You do get a lower level of thrill, but the up side of that is the terror is mostly gone. I still get a little apprehensive some times, but I have done more and more new things and it really is fun.

Just remember, the more you get comfortable with it, the more things you can try. Ever had your nails done? or a waxing? at a non-TG place? I love going out with my wife. We have a great time and she has another girlfriend that is interested in many of the things she is interested in. We've gone to Menopause the Musical together. Haven't tried a concert yet, but that would be fun.

It's like anything else you like. It is a little more memorable when you first do it, then it gets a little more comfortable. Doesn't mean it isn't fun, maybe even more enjoyable without so much stress?

[Sissy]

Kim you are doing good. You will enjoy this for the rest of your life. Good luck to you. Sissy

[Regina girl]

Kim you are way ahead and no it will always be fun I wish I could go out but my chances are very few.

Regina

[paulaN]

like anything, dressing will have it's ups and downs. when you have done every thing that you wanted to do wile dressed. start at the beginning, and do them all over again. that should keep ya busy for a wile longer. he he

[Brianna Lovely]

Although I've been on the "fast track" in my dressing, my major concern, every day, is "I can't wear that top today, because Mary saw it last week" And, which top looks best with this, skirt, shorts, capries, etc.

I think, as we go out more, we start to think like every-day GGs. What flatters our figure, looks good on us and hasn't been seen by to many people.

Whatever you do, don't fall into the jeans-and-tee shirt every day trap.

[Glenda58]

Nice going I told you doing normal things would feel good. The more you do the more things that you'll want to do. It's not the trill you feel it nervousness the trill will always be there. There always be new adventures out there.

[bobby-joe]

Kim I am not as far along as you but I can already see that beginning to happen. About 4 years ago I had a week by myself at home and I went out to Starbucks and a couple of movies by the end of the week I was comfortable, Since then I only dressed and went out occasionally, and I lost my confidence. About 4 months ago, when I meet some girls on this forum and went to a Tri-Ess meeting. I have now rebuilt my confidence and progressed to shopping en-fem. Although it is still exciting I can see that it may become normal. But I'm thinking normal probably isn't bad, in fact I wish I could be a normal girl, maybe not 24/7 since I like you have a family. If once a week I can be a normal women I would feel lucky.

Thanks for all your posts, the truck incident makes the things I have run into dressed, minor in comparision, you handled it well.

Krisla

define !!!!!!!!!!!!! NORMAL WOMAN...!!!!!!!!!!!