Not So Sure (CDing and liking the girlies)

[Charlotte23]

im a young straight male, whos loves the girlies, but however i have a side which pulls me to crossdressing, im soo interested in it. I fanatise over doing it but im not sure if i should try it. I dont think alot of people would help and support me AT ALL and if get caught, i would be done for. But i do have a little twitch in my mind telling me to try it. What do i do ? :(

[Michelle 51]

Well let me just say if you please that little twitch hang on for the ride.Not that it's a bad thing but it can sure get a part of you justabit

[suzy]

I think that you're smitten!:hugs:

And I think it is going to continue to eat at you until you try it.....and I think that once you do put on a pair of panties, or some sexy little item of clothes, you'll be so intrigued, that you'll keep doing it and love every minute of it!:D

Welcome to the forum! Hope to see you here more often!:hugs:

[Gurly]

To quote a commercial from way back, "try it, you'll like it". As far as your being afraid of not having support, that is one of the purposes of this forum and we're always here. That said, the pull of crossdressing (ask anybody who is a member) is hard to fight, so you might as well go ahead and do it but obviously be discreet if you're worried about being discovered. Good luck and keep in touch.

[joperinal]

Same story here. When reading on this forum you will be surprised how many of us have the same story. It is not that you are the only one. If you have no girlfriend or wife: try it. It does not hurt anybody. Try before you die.
And if you don´t like it... no harm done.

[Karren H]

Go for it.... but be ware it's not for the faint of heart, not an easy sport or a cheap one so get ready to open up your purse too!! lol

Karren

[Stephenie S]

im a young straight male, whos loves the girlies, but however i have a side which pulls me to crossdressing, im soo interested in it. I fanatise over doing it but im not sure if i should try it. I dont think alot of people would help and support me AT ALL and if get caught, i would be done for. But i do have a little twitch in my mind telling me to try it. What do i do ? :(

Well Charlotte, you have two choices here and they will effect the rest of your entire life.

You can continue to hide this desire of yours and sneak around living in constant fear that some one will discover your "secret" and that you will then be "done for". Many of us on this forum do just that for our entire lives, hiding a significant portion of our lives from every one around us. This is possible, and many even enjoy the excitment of hiding this secret from the world. There are support groups and forums like this to enjoy the company of others with this "secret" everywhere. You will be able to live a sucessful life never sharing this secret with anyone else around you. Many do.

Or you can decide that this is an important part of yourself that deserves to be shared with your loved ones and maybe even the world around you. Those of us who do this find that not only do most people not really care, but that it can enrich our lives tremendously. I consider my life in two genders to be a blessing. I am a much broader person (to coin a phrase) with a much better appreciation of life in general. And most important, I do not have to live my life in anxiety and fear. My clothes hang in my closet, I am known to many of our friends, some at work think I am insane, and some think I am imoral, but the vast majority do not care a fig. The world in general certainly doesn't care. Others are sooo wrapped up in their own problems that they do not even see you.

If you present to the world with common sense and a modicum of good taste (loose the fish net hose and 6" heels), you will find that CDing can enrich your life without the overriding and constant fear of discovery. And make no mistake, if you choose to hide your CDing, the odds are that you will be discovered at some point in your life.

We have all found that the pleasure from CDing does not EVER go away. It will be with you untill the day you die. You can live your life as you see fit, but my advice is to come "out" to those around you and loose the constant fear. In many ways, your life will be happier and more rewarding. Clinging to the attitude that you will be "done for" is an illusion of your mind.

There is a wealth of information here on this forum. Explore the various departments. Spend some time in the archives or just lurk for a while. Join us. Participate. No decision you make is irrevocable. You can always change your mind whatever you decide. Most of us have a lot of fun with this no matter how we choose to live our lives.

Welcome,

Stephenie

[Nicole]

Stephenie for President! :love:

Definitely heed her advice regarding the appropriateness of your clothes. Don't wear 6" heels, a Cinderella wig, and an evening gown to go shopping at Home Depot!

Enjoy yourself and have fun! Life is too short not to give it a whirl.

[stephni]

Go for it.... but be ware it's not for the faint of heart, not an easy sport or a cheap one so get ready to open up your purse too!! lol

Karren

This is so true! If you decide to do it, when you get the urge, don't purge! I'm embarrassed to disclose just how much money I've thrown out when I purged in the past. It's not worth it to purge because you will want to do it again. And again, and again, and again...

Charlotte, you do what you feel is right deep within you. If you choose to dress up, then I welcome you to funner side of life.:hugs:

stephni

[CaptLex]

You are being seduced by the dark side . . . give in to it. :devil: It's simple: do whatever makes you happy. BTW, crossdressing has nothing to do with your sexual orientation - gay, straight and bi men can all feel the urge to crossdress . . . enjoy! :D

[Charlotte23]

Hmm so what can i do to start ?? clothes, make-up accessories.. any tips ?

[Eva Diva]

Just to be clear: loving the girlies does not exclude you from crossdressing in any way. I"m middle-aged now, and I've spent most of a lifetime loving women. I've never had the slightest interest in gay men - they do absolutely nothing for me. This is different.
Do yourself a favor. Go to the pharmacy or supermarket and buy yourself a tube of lipstick. Stand in front of the mirror, and go to town with that bad giri! If it does to you what it did to me, you'll be out shopping for more the next day. I just started this year, and I wish I had years ago, when I was your age.

[gennee]

I tried it and I like it. It's part of me that has completed me personally. Enjoy the ride.

Gennee

:happy:

[cdmich]

Charlotte,

Since the CD bug has you thinking along those lines, you might as well enjoy it. Dressing is fun and you will enjoy it to an obsession. Start any where you want in buying clothes, etc. Before you know it you have clostes full. Only bad point like Karen says be ready to spend bucks. This is an expensive hobby.

Michelle

[Staci G]

Just to be clear: loving the girlies does not exclude you from crossdressing in any way. I"m middle-aged now, and I've spent most of a lifetime loving women. I've never had the slightest interest in gay men - they do absolutely nothing for me. This is different.
Do yourself a favor. Go to the pharmacy or supermarket and buy yourself a tube of lipstick. Stand in front of the mirror, and go to town with that bad giri! If it does to you what it did to me, you'll be out shopping for more the next day. I just started this year, and I wish I had years ago, when I was your age.

And mascara dont forget the mascara and eyeliner and blush and foundation and eye shadow and another tube of lipstick ect...... it is a never ending line at the checkout. but I love every minute of it...Oh yeah dont forget the panties and bras and skirts and blouses and dresses and capris and corsets and pantyhose and .............

I would not have it anyother way

[susiej]

Charlotte,

When I was young, a guy could expect to be humiliated by a store clerk for attempting to buy a bra, and arrested for wearing one in public.

I also have no sexual interest in guys (like 90% of cd/ts men -- same as the general population). I dated and loved women before settling down. I went into the closet, and here I am, after over 30 years in adult life, still in the closet. I have a wife and a couple of lovely daughters, and they know nothing about this side of me. Now, I'm stuck here. The girls, being young themselves, might understand if I came out. But, my most careful opinion of my darling wife is that she would freak, not only over the basic fact that I think of myself as female sometimes, but also that I've hidden this from her for so long.

There was no choice for me any step along the way, except to lose up front the wonderful lady who would have been my wife, by confiding in her when we were dating. And if I had done that, I would have been no better off, because all I could do is "try again" and hope the next girl was more understanding.

I envy you so much. (1) Times have changed, and people in general are much more understanding about the fuzzy edge between male and female. Gays are leading the way for us, finding acceptance in ways unimaginable ten or twenty years ago. We are next. Many company personnel manuals now have policies to cope with an employee changing gender. In your lifetime, maybe even mine, guys en femme will be just another interesting facet of human life.

(2) You Are Not Alone (btw, look up www.urnotalone.com :)). The internet has provided us a way to form safe, anonymous support groups for each other. In this forum, there are thousands of girls who have experienced what you are going through, along with some extremely kind GGs who have come to accept their men being "gender-agile".

So, my general advice is take it easy, take it slow, but take it. Find clothes you like and buy them openly, or over the internet, and wear them at home. Get some breast forms. Do what Lauren says about make-up, because She's The Lady in that department.

I don't suggest you should immediately come out to everyone you know, however. There still is a cost in doing so. Instead, think of your transgender nature as "gender-agility", like a skill. Practice, practice, practice :). Definitely, if you get serious about a woman, consider letting her in on the fun.

You'll probably find soon enough just how gender-agile you want to be (occasional dresser on the one hand, post-op transsexual on the other), and this, along with evolving societal norms, will show you the way forward. One step, one day at a time.

The goddess has blessed you with a gift. Enjoy it to the fullest!

Hugs,
Susie

[Samantha B L]

Hi CharlotteIf you decide to CD,you're in for a real pleasure.Of course you will probably have to keep it a secret from some people.There are hangouts and places where you can't go there enfemme.But if you decide to try it,even just for a few minutes indoors you'll find that it's exciting.

[sandra-leigh]

im a young straight male, whos loves the girlies

Someone posted a link a few days ago to an interview with a self-help type doctor who had written a couple of books and who had come out in favour of crossdressing. One thing the guy said in the interview was that crossdressers are actually more likely to be straight than the general population, because a lot of crossdressers love women so much that they want to be like them.

[Dixie]

[COLOR="Magenta"]I think if you are thinking about it that much, you are gonna try it eventually anyway so why not now? You will answer all questions and won't have to obsess over whether or not to try it, only obsess over what to wear Tee Hee:heehee: /COLOR]

[Teresa Amina]

Try it now; don't suppress it, binge and purge, etc. If it's you it won't go away, if it's not you might as well find out now.

[Glenda58]

Everyone is going to hate me for Charlotte but if you haven't started don't. Find something other than womens cloths to spend money on. Find a sport join a group that digs ditches anything but this. This life can be hard you may lose the love of your life. You could lose your family and friends and maybe your job. You live in fear that if someone found out they could hurt you. Some people have been beat up because of dressing up. I just want you to know this is now a bed of roses.

Now after reading all that if you still want to dress up this is the place to be. It can be fun and exciting. And if you have a partner that is welling to help and go along with it you could have a good life being a CDer. Because once you start there is no going back. You may stop from time to time but we all come back. I know I have been doing this for over 50 years. I now live alone and do what I want most of the time.