Has living the female side, help you understand females.

[Tamera]

Since you have stepped into a females shoes and have seen things from their point of veiw. Has that helped you with your relationships with them and seen what a female goes through.
Such as maybe their way of thinking,
Why they may be jealous at certain things you do,
Being jealous of other girls,
Why they may yell at you,
Mood swings,
Maybe being looked at as sex objects,
How men hit on women,
How women are treated in the work place,
Etc.
LOL
Tamera

[Kate Simmons]

One of the biggest things I've gotten from it Tamera is new respect for them. While I will never really be a woman, I have a better understanding of what they are "expected" to do by virtue of the fact they are women. Housework--HOW do they do it?, not to mention running errands, co-ordinating schedules, raising children--etc. etc. Being hit on as a "sex object", expected to look like $1,000,000 all the time when you are tired and don't feel well and the biggest one--being expected to be pleasant all the time when you feel anything but. On the plus side, I've got a better sense of empathy and have a need for interpersonal relationships with friends. No one said reality was easy. Like I said, new respect.:happy:

[Laura Jane]

Has living the female side, help you understand females.

Nope! They are still an enigma wrapped inside a mystery, to me!:D

[Suzie S.]

Nope, never, nada...LOL! While I can change my appearance to look like one, I can't rewire my brain to think or feel like one completely. I am male, like it or not. I do believe that embracing and nurturing my fem side has helped me to at least empathize with their trials and tibulations better. GG's are truly a mystery sometimes, and also one of the wonders of the world! :heehee:

[insearchofme]

What Suzie S. said!!!!

[Angie G]

No I still can't get what goes on in there :hugs:
Angie

[Karren H]

Nope.... hasn't helped a bit.... still don't understand them...

Can't live with them, can't live without them, might as well live as one of them...... hehe

Love Karren

[Roberta Lynn]

Shopping, Before I started to dress more I could never understand the shopping thing.
Now I know!
It is IMPOSSIBLE to have too many dresses, skirts, tops ,shoes purses, ect.
There is ALWAYS something that would be nice to have.
I may not know a lot about women but I do understand SHOPPING :happy:

[Toyah]

I love them to bits but understand them noooo way, I dont even understand myself

[paulaN]

I can't say it has helped me understand them one bit.

[Joanie]

On a surface level, yes, can understand the time it takes in getting prepared to go out as putting on hose, makeup, etc. takes longer than just going out male (actually, I don't go out dressed as a female, don't have the courage yet but you know what I mean).

Beyond that, I don't have periods, so this is only a surface transformation.

[Kristen Kelly]

Can't live with them, can't live without them, might as well live as one of them...... hehe
Love Karren


Shopping, Before I started to dress more I could never understand the shopping thing.
Now I know!
It is IMPOSSIBLE to have too many dresses, skirts, tops ,shoes purses, ect.
There is ALWAYS something that would be nice to have.
I may not know a lot about women but I do understand SHOPPING :happy:

Understanding would be a difficult word to use, understand why they do things they do yes. I understand why it takes so long to get ready, why with a closet of clothes they have nothing to wear. What it feels like to be hit on by men, and what it feels not to be hit on by men when you feel you look "HOT." I have walked a mile in their shoes and yes it has made me a better person, one that understands others but one that truely understands myself.

[Helen H. Heels]

As sister Karren has said, live W/O them but perhaps as one of the sweet gender people.Two marriages and maybe two lifetimes will still bring confusion and questions as to what is going on.

There was a short lived animated series about God and a suburban husband he communicated with. God told this fellow that he created man in his own image but woman, even he could not comprehend!!!

So we continue, a small insight is gained from a forum like this but it is still our expereience that will lead-and don't forget the Mars/Venus disarrangement.

Thanks for listening,
Helen.

[Fab Karen]

[QUOTE=Salandra;824052]One of the biggest things I've gotten from it Tamera is new respect for them. While I will never really be a woman, I have a better understanding of what they are "expected" to do by virtue of the fact they are women. Housework--HOW do they do it?, not to mention QUOTE]

HOUSEWORK EXPECTED? Have you looked at a calendar?

[Kate Simmons]

[QUOTE=Salandra;824052]One of the biggest things I've gotten from it Tamera is new respect for them. While I will never really be a woman, I have a better understanding of what they are "expected" to do by virtue of the fact they are women. Housework--HOW do they do it?, not to mention QUOTE]

HOUSEWORK EXPECTED? Have you looked at a calendar?I know Karen, that's why I put expected in quotation marks. Nowadays, it's a team effort, at least it should be. Still, some guys from the "old school" (like my father in law) expect to be waited on.:rolleyes:

[Pamela75s]

I can not say that I know how a woman feels or thinks, but I do know that I have more respect for them. I have a better understanding on how to treat women, and what they must go through on a daily bases. I try to do what I can to make their life and my wifes life easier. ( I still wish I could live for a good amount of time as Pamela:) )
Have a good day
Pamela

[trannie T]

I still don't understand women.
When I'm dressed I don't even understand myself.

[veronicag48]

I've been dressing for some 50 years. Had numerous relationships(no brag just fact) and into my 4th marriage of 9 yrs going for ever hopefully. But what really gave me an insight to a women's feelings and mind was about 12 years ago when I was working graveyard shifts and watched the talk shows like Oprha ect that related to women and their inner most feelings and how they needed to be nurtured. Crossdressing for all those years just gave me an insight of how they got into and out of their clothes.:heehee: But seriously when I got married for the 4th and final time I was already knowledgeable and could handle and comfort my wife when she started going thru "the change". So crossdressing might have contributed to my understanding of the way of a woman's mind. the talk shows of the early days helped a lot. Too bad there aren't any talk shows to show a woman how a man thinks and get into his mind more.:2c:

[Deborah]

I can only guess that i do. Since i wasn't born a GG i only have an idea.

[jessie_cal]

Nope they are as much a mystery to me as men who don't crossdress :D

[JacquiUKTV]

I'm genuinely surprised that so many answer in the negative. I think I understand women quite well...(flow-diagram to follow :LOL:).
But seriously, apart from being married I 've had many female friends in my life and have been told more than once (as a compliment) that they like me because I "understand how women think".
Going away now to think this over....I wonder (not without some trepidation) whether there's a little secret I should reveal to myself.....

[SandyR]

Well, I really can appreciate how long it takes to get ready. makup, hiar, get shaved, but other then that, nope!

SandyR

[kerrianna]

I've always understood women better than men, although I'm always learning more, about both sides actually. I'm fortunate in that Carol and I are and have always been best friends, and are open and free with each other. As far as political, social issues go, I've always been pretty sensitive to that (I recall making a sculpture/collage thing when I was about 20 that was about the sexual objectification of women, and how many of my GFs GG friends thought it was totally cool that a guy got that.) I'm not trying to brag here...it's just the way I've always thought. Carol was on the frontlines of domestic abuse and very immersed in feminism for a long period too, so I learned a lot about what kind of barriers women have had to and continue to face.

I also grew up in a strong matriarchal family, and with pretty poor male role models, so that must have influenced me a lot.

Women tend to like and trust me as a friend, which wasn't what I wanted sometimes in the past :rolleyes: , but now I'm really glad for that. I've finally started to figure out that I Gender Identify as a female - and that in fact has helped me like men better, oddly enough. :p :D

[Tamera]

With some of the replies. Some of us still don't have a clue about women even though we have walked in their shoes.
While others have learned about:
Makeup, Maintanance, cooking, cleaning, children, and being the streagth of a household and being caring when your male spouse needs a lil' comfort.

1. But what about equality with a man?
2. Being bought a drink at the bar because the guy wants to get lucky?
3. Politics?
4. The things that interests women compared to men?
5. Books that a woman will read compared to a man?
6. What a woman looks for in a man?
7. Things that a women talk about when out with the girls compared to what men talk about when?
8. Birth Control?
9. Having babies?
10.Careers?

Come on get in touch with your fem side and give it what you got!!!!

Many of us say that when we are fem our thoughts and actions turn fem also. Well whats the difference that you see between the two?
LOL
Tamera

[kerrianna]

Okay Tamera I'll try to be more specific with what I think.


1. But what about equality with a man?
Ha! I'd like to believe that we are equal but there is still too many things that say otherwise. Pay inequity, the low number of women in positions of real power (and many who are that act like males to get and stay there), inherant sexism in many organized religions still, proliferation of pornography -much of which debases and subsumes women and much of which is built on the backs of abused coerced young women. I could go on. In our society much progress has been made (with great struggle) but it still has a ways to go. In some societies, being female is worse than being a livestock animal.



2. Being bought a drink at the bar because the guy wants to get lucky?
That hasn't happened to me, but I would be curious as to how I would feel. I think it appeals to some parts of me for sure, just to be pursued, to be desired. Of course if the guy is yicky or scary, not so much fun. That's why GFs travel together.



3. Politics?
See my feminism rant above. Politics is still a man's game way too much in my country at least. Getting a bit better, long long way to go. Women weren't even given the vote until 1929 here in Canada.



4. The things that interests women compared to men?
Relationships are more important than things. Intuition and emotions weigh in quicker. Obviously personal appearance and fashion, but that's pushed by consumerism and advertising so much. These are generalities. I know men who value the things I said, and women who repudiate them. But generally speaking those are a few things that come to mind.



5. Books that a woman will read compared to a man?
Books about ordinary people living extraordinary and courageous lives. Some women really love romance books. I haven't read one for awhile. I should try. Might be interesting now that I've accepted myself more. Again, indivduals read different stuff. Some women like non-fiction and scifi, fantasy, but generally I think they read more general fiction.



6. What a woman looks for in a man?
Depends on the woman. Generally I think women want men to be reliable, trustworthy, sensitive and romantic, have a good sense of humour. Being physically capable and attractive doesn't hurt. I don't think rich is that important to most women, as long as the guy isn't a freeloader. Women want a guy who is going to be a supportive, loving, giving part of their lives, not a draining, difficult, untrustworthy person.



7. Things that a women talk about when out with the girls compared to what men talk about when?
Depends on the people. Sometimes girls will talk about men, relationship, and sex in a frank and open way. Sometimes they talk about thier lives in general. Mostly it revolves around the relationships (family/friends/lovers) of their lives. Men talk about things a lot more - sports, cars, jobs, gizmos. They talk about personal things too but in a much more guarded way. With good friends I think guys let their guard done quite a bit and talk about a lot of stuff women talk about.



8. Birth Control?
Only one of the most important things a sexually active woman has to think about. That's why so many women take charge of that. It's their bodies, their lives (not saying men's aren't, just not the same way) that are primarily affected by ....



9. Having babies?
Some women don't ever want to. Some have a great desire too. It depends on the indvidual. Most women who chose either course are happy with their decisions.



10.Careers?
I think most women in our society want to make some contribution and have a career or work identity. Many women recognize that being a mother is a full time job itself and are happy to pursue that. Sometimes when the two clash it can be difficult because in many cases it is the woman who has to make both work. Partly due to pay and power inequity and social expectations. If guys can make more money and are accepted more into the power structures it makes sense for couples to have the guy working more. I do know many couples where that is reversed now, because a female lawyer for instance is able to make more money than a male freelance writer. I think women would like to see more career choices and more equal pay still available to them.



Come on get in touch with your fem side and give it what you got!!!!
Many of us say that when we are fem our thoughts and actions turn fem also. Well whats the difference that you see between the two?
LOL
Tamera

These are generalizations Tamera. And a lot of what I feel with my fem side isn't really well expressed this way. Having said all the above I think there is much much more in common with men and women than what seperates them. That's why we generally get along and like each other, and why many of us can have both sides co-exist within. My :2c:

[Joy Carter]

Since you have stepped into a females shoes and have seen things from their point of view. Has that helped you with your relationships with them and seen what a female goes through.
Such as maybe their way of thinking,
Why they may be jealous at certain things you do,
Being jealous of other girls,
Why they may yell at you,
Mood swings,
Maybe being looked at as sex objects,
How men hit on women,
How women are treated in the work place,
Etc.
LOL
Tamera

You know Tamera I don't get the notion that women have it any harder then men. Some talk like there are prisoners of this society that they "have to" do what society dictates. And as far as how they are treated in the work place that is another fallacy. I can tell you about two women I worked with that were just out right nasty to men.
Allot of what you ask here is from your one point of view. It's up to the individual as to how they feel.

In my view women are to be cherished. I have several female friends and they all know how I feel about them.

Sorry about going off subject Tamera. I just don't have any revolations about how Iv'e changed my thinking now that I can dress.

[TxKimberly]

No one understands women. Women don't understand women - just ask one!
Now this HAS given me a better understanding of what they go through, and perhaps a bit more respect for them (though my respect factor was always pretty high to start with). I understand my wifes pain when she steps on the scales (something she avoids these days), or when she is looking at a magazine and sighs because she knows there's no way a real woman, who eats, drinks, and plays is ever going to fit into one of those dresses or look anything like that if she could. I understand why she will make a disgusted sound when she is looking at womens jeans and stomp over to the guys section and buy the male levis because they are about half the price and fit better.
I sure as hell don't give her grief when she is putting on her makeup and I have to wait, because I know it takes me twice as long as it does her! lol
But these things I understand are all superficial, and they don't add up to understanding women.
I think to understand women, you have to grasp a few things deep down inside. Like how it feels to have step fathers hit on you, to have managers that you liked or at least respected hit on you and then threaten your career if you mention it. You have to know what it feels like to have your friends abondon you because they don't want to rock the good ol boy boat by speaking up against managers that have harrased you. I'd be willing to bet that most GGs reading these boards could add dozens of things to the "You would have to know" list I just started if they wanted to.

Kim

[Tamera]

It's been intereting on all the replies.

People have often said something to the effect of;
You don't know anything about me, so unless "You have walked in my shoes" don't criticize me.

And it was that phrase that started this thread.

Yea each individual is different. But each sex has familiararities of themselves, whether if they are in a group of the same sex or invoved in a conversation of mixed sex.

Its also interesting in the different roles each one playes in a relationship. For instance one might say "THE HOUSE IS HER JOB" and "THE OUTSIDE IS HIS JOB".

How a woman will flirt, such as the twirling of her hair, or by a certain smile. Compared to how a man may flirt, sometimes by just being SILLY.

These are some things I have noticed.
LOL
Tamera

[XDW Nathan-Natasha]

My insights into the female world have been pretty small as I have yet to go out totally enfemme, but I feel that my understanding of women and their lives has grown since I've started dressing again.
-I think I'm more in touch with women's emotions.
-I think I can understand a lot of what they go through - discrimination, objectification, etc. somewhat better, though I have yet to experience it; when I see it or hear about it enfemme I react and think differently about it now - I guess you could say I take notice.
-My whole impression of men and what makes a man changes when I'm enfemme.
-My whole impression of women and what makes a woman who she is has changed. Heck, even the types of women I find attractive change when I'm enfemme (though my fiance is always beautiful to me...enfemme or otherwise).
-My sense of what's fashionale for women has changed. I can't say the same for my fashion sense as a male. I still dress like myself - which can be good or bad depending on how you look at it (t-shirt + overshirt + jeans + cheap watch + huge crucifix 'round my neck + random accessories and shoes = me as a guy). There are SO many more options when I'm enfemme.
-As strange as it sounds, I think I am starting to feel what it is (probably psychosomatically - that is, physical sensations created by mind's influence, for the non-psychy people out there) to have female sex organs. When these feelings cross with my usual feelings of having male sex organs confusion ensues.

If I think of anything else I'll post it here ladies - espeically once I get out in the world!

[Kelsy]

Insight maybe !! Understanding I don't know? :idontknow: Problem is I have this male side that interferes quite often! I have learned that I does take time to get dressed and ready to go out, that a trip to the bathroom is a bit more involved, oh! and try packing to go on a trip, the boy me can pack all he needs in a carry on the girl me needs to rent a U-haul!! :heehee: Mechanical insight at best --Understanding --- developing!

Jennifer:D

[KathrynTX]

Somewhat. I don't pretend to understand everything about women, but I consider myself more sensitive and responsive to their feelings than the average guy.

[Wenda]

Although I have only been actively dressing for the past three years, I have lived in a femme world for years. Even when I worked in the rodeo industry, most of the people I worked with were women. I apologized to a co-worker this week because I learned from a colleague that she thought I was hitting on her because I was 'over-complimentary' on her outfit at a function.
It was a wake-up call. Some of the people I work with are familiar with Wenda and/or Polly, but I think most of them regard them as 'cartoon' characters rather than actual personalities. I realized on Thursday, that the heavy bald guy who comments on the great shoes, the awesome rust-coloured layered skirt, etc, is not likely to be seen as 'femme-positive'.
Many women have had 'compliments' like 'great boots', which is not actually a compliment on the boots, but rather means "Nice Legs!", or "Tight Ass" or .....?
So, my little lesson is that people understand who they perceive you to be. If I visualize myself as the 40 something femme, commenting on a sister's boots, that is positive. If she receives the message as a 50 something old guy commenting on her boots, that can be very negative.
The message is interpretted by the receiver. w. :straightface:

[Alex!]

I think Kathryn said it best - I am more sensitive to what a woman deals with when compared to a guy who does not crossdress. I certainly understand the need to look nice, and that this process involves many levels - toiletries, clothing, perfumes, makeup, mannerisms, etc. For guys, the ability to look good is relatively easy, though there appear to be few men who know how to dress and conduct themselves as gentlemen (in fact, a lot of women seem to have lost a sense of confident class, too). I understand the whole "looking for just the right shoe" thing, and how searching for the right jewelry can be a major undertaking. I think I also understand a bit better that strange balance between compliment and offense, between someone looking your way nicely and someone staring at you in that sort of manimal way.

Somehow, I feel "sexier" en femme and not so much in guy mode. This is perhaps because women have access to a great deal more in terms of illusion, though it is of course well known that it doesn't take much to turn a guy on (kind of an odd irony - if it doesn't take much, then why do women fuss so much about appearance? Clearly, looking good has much more to do with fun than with men).

But as to what goes on deeper inside a woman's head? I think that shall remain a mystery to me :)

[Rikkicn]

My wife is a feminist and I have had a wonderful education about womens issues etc.
The world is a less welcoming place if your born female. Sad

[Jocelyn Quivers]

While maybe I do understand why I now cannot tell my wife. "Ok lets go out for formal theatre play and dinner" on the spur of the moment due to the time it takes to put on make up and choose an outfit. Or the thrill from spending hours shopping for 1 pair of shoes. My brain is still wired as male and no matter how mature my feminine side gets, it still is ultimately controlled by a male personality and the way I see things en femme is still through male eyes. Jocelyn

[Shelly R]

With some of the replies. Some of us still don't have a clue about women even though we have walked in their shoes.
While others have learned about:
Makeup, Maintanance, cooking, cleaning, children, and being the streagth of a household and being caring when your male spouse needs a lil' comfort.

1. But what about equality with a man?
2. Being bought a drink at the bar because the guy wants to get lucky?
3. Politics?
4. The things that interests women compared to men?
5. Books that a woman will read compared to a man?
6. What a woman looks for in a man?
7. Things that a women talk about when out with the girls compared to what men talk about when?
8. Birth Control?
9. Having babies?
10.Careers?

Come on get in touch with your fem side and give it what you got!!!!

Many of us say that when we are fem our thoughts and actions turn fem also. Well whats the difference that you see between the two?
LOL
Tamera

What a dare! :heehee:
Being full time for the last few years, yes, it has helped me to understand women. Some things I'm going to miss on simply because I can't and won't ever experience them for myself.
Equality with a man? No female is really equal, on the job, pay, discrimination, being devalued (all the time!), not being taken seriously, being invisable, being made to wait because I am a woman. I want basic equality, job pay & etc.
But I don't really want equality all the way, I like a gentelman, I love to be treated like a lady, hold the door open, pull out my chair, and respect me as a woman, and not totally an equal. Have my cake and eat it too? You bet! I'm sure that most women don't want to be equal all the time either.
Drinks at a bar. It is flattering especially if he looks good and has a sense of humor! If he expects to get lucky, not even! I am not cheap, and easy (sleazy). I know most women don't like Mr lucky either. He has to dance too. But a date, I want to get to know him first!
On politics, not anyone's best subject, all opnions are on the table, womens or mens equally.
Intrests, now we are ending up in stereotypes, cooking, cleaning, shopping, careing for others, social activism, these are some of the things I like to do, and have all my life. No longer is this a woman's domain only. Ps. I could use some help with the house work!
I know what I would look for Clean, well dressed and groomed, like to have fun, can dance, sensative and personal, a gentelman, Independant (no emotionally wrecked clingers please!) Most women want the same.
When I'm out with the girls, we talk about the guys (good, bad and the two guys that want to buy us a drink!), our relationships, family, careers, clothes, shoes, who does our nails, other women. Men talk about the same things mostly from their owm perspectives.
We have never talked about birth control, mostly STD's, they know I won't understand from their point.
Having babies, I wish!! I do know what it is like to diaper (cloth type) and feed a baby at all hours of the night, bathe, clothe, the whole deal. The joy is when your baby says it's first word, and takes it's first steps, the god given miracle.
Carrers- see equality.
Now for some of my extras, flirting, I do a lot of different things, seductive is about being subtle, a look of interest, a coy smile and demeanor, play with the rim of my glass, reveal a little more leg, quietly play with the strap of my shoe (if they have them), a very controlled light touch to their hand, sitting close to slightly invade their space, yes, and twirl my hair. Anything else I can learn by watching other women at work. Men can be silly, humorous, fun, and a show-off.
That's it for now, the list could go on forever