I too came out at work today.

[michelleupnorth]

Well a little background for those that don't know me yet. I'm in the Canadian Military as a reservist. I spent 20 years in the regular force and then switched over. I have come out to my civilian Dr. and he was very cool with it and has set up a referral for me on the 5th of July, I can't wait.

Today I came out to my military Dr. and it was like he was stuck in stupid mode. I told him that I was transgendered and he couldn't even look me in the eyes anymore. I told him that I wanted to see a specialist and he was speechless. He never asked me any questions as to why I felt this way or anything. After a long silence I said "well I guess that's it?" He said "yes, have a good day Sir." I think the Sir comment made was a mistake and I just brushed it off.

I'm going to give him till next week to digest this and then I'm going to ask to see him again.

Because I'm in the military I'm expected to keep my hair short and shave. I talked to someone else who has transitioned while serving and I can get a medical excuse so that I don't have to cut my hair. I have to let my face hair grow out a bit before electrolysis and laser, which I'm also going to need a medical excuse for.

So next week I plan on asking for that. I was having a hard time trying to figure out how I am going to be fulltime as a woman when I need to shave my head and now I know that I can.

Next week should be even more interesting.

[AllieSF]

Wow Michelle, that was a brave move. Good luck with your future.

[Teresa Amina]

he was stuck in stupid mode

:D He probably never thought he'd run into someone transitioning in the Forces. Must have been quite the "deer in the headlights" look :D

[michelleupnorth]

:D He probably never thought he'd run into someone transitioning in the Forces. Must have been quite the "deer in the headlights" look :D

I guess I'll have to educate the poor Dr. and teach him about who we are.:D

[AmberTG]

That might be a bigger task then you want to take on, doctors can be incredibly narrow minded sometimes.

[sandra-leigh]

Today I came out to my military Dr.

That's quite a step up from your recent "no friends" thread in which you were planning to duck and cover until your last 6 months were up, and then move away and start over.

If you don't mind my asking: is the change due to positive thoughts or to negative thoughts? I'm not sure I can explain that quite right, but I'll try: Did you say to yourself "I'm miserable hiding away and can't stand it anymore, coming out is going to be really rough but it can't be any worse than staying in!"? Or did you say to yourself, "Hey, I'm essentially female, and I accept that about myself, and I don't mind the world knowing; if some people can't handle it, I'm not going to let that get me down, because I have the self-confidence to go forward and be who I really am!"?

[michelleupnorth]

That's quite a step up from your recent "no friends" thread in which you were planning to duck and cover until your last 6 months were up, and then move away and start over.

If you don't mind my asking: is the change due to positive thoughts or to negative thoughts? I'm not sure I can explain that quite right, but I'll try: Did you say to yourself "I'm miserable hiding away and can't stand it anymore, coming out is going to be really rough but it can't be any worse than staying in!"? Or did you say to yourself, "Hey, I'm essentially female, and I accept that about myself, and I don't mind the world knowing; if some people can't handle it, I'm not going to let that get me down, because I have the self-confidence to go forward and be who I really am!"?


I still plan on moving away in six months and really look forward to it. I guess the best way to explain it is yes, I am tired of hiding, and yes I am accepting who I am and don't care what the world thinks anymore because it's my life and they have ther issues and I have mine. I'm dealing with mine now and yes this site has actually given me the strenght to do just that.

[sandra-leigh]

I guess the best way to explain it is yes, I am tired of hiding, and yes I am accepting who I am and don't care what the world thinks anymore because it's my life and they have ther issues and I have mine. I'm dealing with mine now and yes this site has actually given me the strenght to do just that.

Cool. Now you don't have to hide in your room alone anymore.

I was reading some pages about crossdressing in the US military. Apparently officially crossdressing even off-base away from any other personnel, is still considered a violation of uniform regulations and could lead to a court marshal there. I haven't seen any comparible analysis for the Canadian military though; I hope you are able to dress off-base at least. And you should have your medical papers soon anyhow.

[Teresa Amina]

crossdressing in the US military. Apparently officially crossdressing even off-base away from any other personnel, is still considered a violation of uniform regulations and could lead to a court marshal there

Way back when I was in the US Navy I dressed even on base :eek: Was nearly caught a couple times, very scary. But I "had to", you know :D

[loriannetucson]

Good for you, Michelle! It sounds like the doc had a "Dee dee-dee!" moment. Next time he just stares tell him you brought him a helmet to wear and that you found his baseball.

[GypsyKaren]

Good for you Michelle, that took a lot of guts, you deserve a pat on the back!

Karen

[claireswife-gg]

Wow, that's great :D You must feel like a load has been lifted (and yet another probably added?) after telling him. I'll bet he was floored. I hope it all goes well for you!

[kerrianna]

Good for you Michelle! :hugs: Another stepping stone traversed along the way. Good luck next week and keep us informed. If they give you any grief a bunch of us will get together and have a tea party outside the base. :D
:love:

[Siobhan Marie]

Good for you Michelle, I would love to have seen the look on your doctors face when you told him.

huge :hugs: and *cuddles*

Anna Marie x

[Shelly R]

Congratulations! That was a very brave thing to do. Good luck! :hugs:

[joanlynn28]

I hope things go well for you and welcome to the group of us fulltimers. Things obviously are more forgiving up in Canada I take it. I met a young gentleman at my support group meeting this month who was not as fortunate as you Michelle. I spoke of how he couldn't hide anymore and went and told the captain of us ship about being transgendered and also homosexual, a big no-no in the US military. The result was he was given a general discharge because of his mental illness (according to the navy doctors) and was said to be unfit for military service. I guess it did not help him either that he was stationed aboard the USS Nimitz and worked around the nuclear reactor. Best of luck to you though, I know how it is I have been fulltime at work now for a month and coworkers(the ones that really care) admire the courage and strength I have shown through my transition.