Privacy *sigh*

[Rachel Ann]

Hi girls

I've been getting too many unwanted IMs and emails that almost certainly originated here. So, I had to delete my IM addresses from my profile. If anyone I actually know wants to chat with me, please send me a PM.

One thing might cut down on this. Almost all of the messages in which I could actually identify the sender came from people who joined months ago and never posted, or only ever posted once or twice, right after joining. Would it be practical to periodically purge members like that?

Love

[Tristen Cox]

I was thinking that myself Rachel. I have gotten a PM from a member who has been registered here for 8 months and never posted. There are many who simply become members to make use of the PM system for meeting those posting in the personals. If you go throught the member list however there are quite alot that have signed in as a member and never return. At some point I think it would be an excellent idea to remove them from the list. Sorry about the trouble you've been having. Anyone you place on your ignore list can 'not' send you a private message. Removing your info is the next step I would suggest as you have done to obtain privacy. If this is something everyone would agree upon, I see no reason why we can't have this list cleaned up a bit, but it would do no good for those 'new' members signing up. You know where to reach me;)


Love
Tristen

[Sweet Susan]

Sorry about your troubles, Rachel, and I think your idea is a good one. It has my vote.

[Wendy me]

reachel sorry to hear that yes some pm to pick up people ..........just not reply or say not intrested ..........

huge hugs for you girlfreind

[Stephanie Brooks]

Well, some kind of a cleanup may make sense. Many services, email for instance, will deactivate an account after a period of inactivity. Some will let you reactivate the account within a given time limit, but at some point they kill the account and make the account name available to anyone.

With reasonable limits, I don't see that as being a bad thing. If someone hasn't used their account for a month or two, deactivating it would seem fairly reasonable. Whether accounts are ever killed is something Admin and the moderators would need to ultimately decide.

For instance, if an account were killed and the name made available to new users, what happens to old posts under the original account name? Are those automatically deleted, or could the old messages be reassigned to a unique dead account name?

For example, "AcmeTG" becomes a member and blethers until her fingers bleed. After awhile, she leaves. Her account becomes inactive and then is killed. The forum managers move "AcmeTG" to something like "AcmeTG-Inactive-2005". Someone decides she wants to be AcmeTG and begins posting prolifically. The original posts remain in the system under the name AcmeTG-Inactive-2005, and AcmeTG's posts appear under her name.

On the other hand, killing stale accounts probably does nothing to stop a troll. It takes little effort to create an account here, and it takes an equally trivial amount of work to create a web email address that can be abused. Also, I don't see that deactivating stale accounts contributes measurably to system security. If deactivating or killing old accounts won't help and does nothing otherwise beneficial to the service, then the effort expended in deactivating stale accounts takes the people managing this service away from doing things that would be beneficial to the service.

Just a couple of thoughts.

Btw, I've gotten a couple messages recently too. At least one was an email, the other a PM. While I didn't reply, they were not offensive. In fact, they were complimentary. I guess a girl's got to expect a little of that. :p

[Priscilla1018]

Hi Rachel Ann,

I am sorry you are having a problem, a persons privacy should always be respected , decent people have no problem with that. I also give my vote to Tristen, it's difficult to keep this site clean. People who only post once or twice when they first join and then are not heard from again are, I think, only seeking entertainment and not true friendship like the rest of us.

Love and Hugs,
Priscilla

[Rachel Ann]

Thanks, girls. It’s not the end of the world but it’s become quite a nuisance!


Anyone you place on your ignore list can 'not' send you a private message.
I haven’t had trouble with PMs, just IMs.



I see no reason why we can't have this list cleaned up a bit, but it would do no good for those 'new' members signing up.
Nothing’s perfect, but it would help. Most of the time I have no idea who the people in the “Happy Birthday Thread” are. :p

There would have to be some sort of reasonable time period in deference to new members who are just shy and want to lurk for a little while. A couple of months, perhaps? Of course, this would have to be stated in the guidelines or on the enrollment panel.



just not reply or say not intrested
The trouble is, some of them are legitimate and/or from other sources, so I have to go to the trouble of communicating a little to find out.



I hope just taking my IM info off my profile will clear up the problem.

Again, thanks for your support, ladies.

Love

[Wendy me]

sorry to hear that a few are causeing that,.......i hope people respect each outher
more hugs

[Rachel Ann]

Excellent points as always, Stephanie.


Well, some kind of a cleanup may make sense. Many services, email for instance, will deactivate an account after a period of inactivity.
I don't think that people with a long posting history ought to be deactivated or deleted. People DO go on hiatus from time to time.



Also, I don't see that deactivating stale accounts contributes measurably to system security.
All I can say is that almost all of my unwanted messages have come from stale accounts with a very low post count. And there is also the sheer clutter factor, which has other consequences.



… the effort expended in deactivating stale accounts takes the people managing this service away from doing things that would be beneficial to the service.
I don’t understand why we only have one active mod at a time. Many hands make light work.

Can guests see everything that members can?



While I didn't reply, they were not offensive. In fact, they were complimentary. I guess a girl's got to expect a little of that. :p

If she's lucky. ;) Messages like that are not unwanted, at least by me! I try to reply nicely to anything that’s not in the “wanna f***” category.



... a persons privacy should always be respected , decent people have no problem with that. ... Well, it is the internet. Nobody here really has any privacy. But we can take reasonable measures to protect ourselves.

Love

[Tristen Cox]

As a guest you can not send PMs or e-mails to any members. This is some peoples primary goal in registering. Your IM information IS accessable to every visitor who comes here so they can use that to make contact with you. I originally had a different yahoo id which soon was changed because of that. Although they now can see my new id I just do a quick search on the member list, if they aren't a member or I do not trust them I don't accept their invitation to add them and opt to block them from seeing when I am online on messenger. Other sites/forums seem to be the same way as far as IM services go, so it's really up to everyone to chose whether or not they want that info public.




*hugs*
Tristen

[Rachel Ann]

Just to repeat myself:


If anyone I actually know wants to chat with me, please send me a PM.
:)

[Admin]

Did a little cleaning up and pruned 2000+ inactive users. Not sure it will help anything but it made me feel better :-)

[Stephanie Brooks]

Hi Rachel Ann!



[color=black]All I can say is that almost all of my unwanted messages have come from stale accounts with a very low post count. And there is also the sheer clutter factor, which has other consequences.

Well, from a practical perspective, if deactivating stale accounts would stop the hibernating trolls, then it makes lots of sense!



[color=black]
I don’t understand why we only have one active mod at a time. Many hands make light work.

You know, this makes lots of sense.

Tristen, do you, the other moderators, and Admin have any strategy for forum moderation? We're not in any significant crisis at the moment from what I see. Perhaps it is time to look at the size and complexity of this service and what might be needed in the coming months to keep everything running smoothly. My sense is that this place is growing again, and loading a small number of people with all of the work doesn't seem to be a good idea, especially if we encounter a significant crisis.

The h/w and s/w side seems to be just fine. It's the day-to-day moderation and dealing with problems, both in advance and while they're occuring. Do we need more moderators?


[color=black]If she's lucky. ;) Messages like that are not unwanted, at least by me! I try to reply nicely to anything that’s not in the “wanna f***” category.

;)

[Stephanie Brooks]

Did a little cleaning up and pruned 2000+ inactive users. Not sure it will help anything but it made me feel better :-)
WOW! Thank you!!!!!!

[Priscilla1018]

WOW! Thank you!!!!!!
Thank you very much Admin.
Hugs,
Priscilla

[Fallen Angel]

wow rachel im sorry too. and your right some of the guest regerster here just to drop e-mails on us. some are very encouraging and some are just plain vulger but we are members,a family and freinds i had the same proublem and went to tristen just dont respond to them. when a member sends me a e-mail its pure sincerity so dont be to hasty we luv you

[Ashleigh]

Thank you Admin.

[Claire B]

I agree with the other girls. the purge should be done. I just got am AIM form some clown named BarneyBra. I do not know this person. So I used the AIM blocker. Even though i don't post very much, I truly enjoy being a member and reading the post each morning. I have gained insight on severl issues, just by reading.

Hugs and Kisses
Claire

[Tristen Cox]

As I said all IM info that you add to your profile is visible TO ALL VISITORS. This is a 'public' site and anyone can get that info if you put it up for viewing.

[Fallen Angel]

you are right tristen, we are giong to get fan mail god i luv fan mail

[Lindahexi]

I'd like to agree with the purge idea, and I sympathize with members that get pestered with unwanted IM, PM or Email, but I'd like to say that I've sent mail etc myself, and always recieved polite replies.

Sometimes I just feel it more appropriate than posting here, it depends what I want to know and how private I want to be, I hope that sounds the way I mean it and in no way secretive.

Am I being naive? I sent Birthday wishes to a girl on the 'Birthday List', it just seemed like a nice thing to do.

Linda.

[irish7]

Whew!! I'm still on the list........... lol

[Madilyn]

Did a little cleaning up and pruned 2000+ inactive users. Not sure it will help anything but it made me feel better :-)

Hey Girls,

Long time no chat (to those that remember me). I just wanted to say that I understand the concerns that have been stated in this thread, but I'd hate to think that I'd be "eliminated" in one fell swoop like the Admin has just done. :eek:

I may not actively chat with everyone as I once did, but I still read through the posts and I'm always logged-in when I do. I'll stick my nose in where it doesn't belong once in awhile and post, but in my opinion, I've been pretty "inactive" since last fall. :(

If I have to post once in awhile to be considered "active" then that won't be a problem, but just because I don't post as often as I used to doesn't mean that I don't love all of you and maintain an active interest in what goes on with each of you and this forum. :)

There are a lot of complexities with this matter, and rude IM's, PM's, and E-Mails are not to be tolerated, but please be careful with the arbitrary deletions or you may lose somebody who really cares, but for various reasons doesn't post a lot. Just my two cents...

Kisses,

Maddy :cool:

[Tristen Cox]

No offense to anyone here. I will say this one more time for those who are missing the picture.

THE ACCOUNTS THAT WERE DELETED HAVE NOTLOGGED IN IN SIX MONTHS. That has nothing to do with them not posting. If they have not signed onto the site then they are wasting names other users could have and obviously have no need to even send a PM to anyone. 2000 registered names collecting dust and never returning to simply log in is a huge waste for them and for us. I hope everyone can agree upon this. Anyone going on a extended trip can certainly notify me or Julie M. even administration to have their account held open and active. However this is not a scheduled clean up that will be routinely done.


*hugs*
Tristen

PS. Hi Maddy:)

[spaskinstyle]

I'll probably hate myself for asking this but what is trolling? Everyone is talking about this and I don't know what the heck it is...

Is it something I should be on the look out for? I know, I'm a dingbat GG. Just a little bit ...
Thanks,

Theresa

[DanaJ]

Trolling is explained here (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Internet_troll). The short answer is an Internet troll is a person who sends messages on the Internet hoping to entice other users in to angry or fruitless responses.

DanaJ

[spaskinstyle]

Well thank you Dana, that is not at all what I thought it was. I'm glad I asked after all. Now I know what those disagreeable bunch on the other site are all about.... LOL...thanks for your help.

Love to you,
Theresa

[Rachel Ann]

WOW! I had no idea that this thread would generate so much interest, much less so many varied replies. Thank you girls, for your supportive remarks!



Did a little cleaning up and pruned 2000+ inactive users. Not sure it will help anything but it made me feel better :-)
I thank you! And I'm sure many of the other sisters do as well.



Do we need more moderators?
Could be. Besides spreading the work around, there is something to be said for having several mods with different points of view. If they confer privately with each other and the admin before taking drastic actions, more confidence in the forum results. Some forums have a restricted folder for this.

Btw Stephanie, I love your new av. It's just darling! <3



when a member sends me a e-mail its pure sincerity so dont be to hasty we luv you
Thanks, hon. I try to give everybody the benefit of the doubt at first. If it's one of "those", I say "post for a while so I can get to know you, then let's talk."



god i luv fan mail
We all do (within limits)!



... I've sent mail etc myself, and always recieved polite replies. ... Sometimes I just feel it more appropriate than posting here, it depends what I want to know and how private I want to be ... I sent Birthday wishes to a girl on the 'Birthday List', it just seemed like a nice thing to do.

No argument here. I get nice mail and I love it. Especially when it says something like "you're cute, may I write to you?" - that sets the heart of an old lady aflutter! It's just the obscene solicitations that get on my nerves.



If I have to post once in awhile to be considered "active" then that won't be a problem, but just because I don't post as often as I used to doesn't mean that I don't love all of you and maintain an active interest in what goes on with each of you and this forum.
I remember you Maddy, and it's always a treat to hear from you! :)



Anyone going on a extended trip can certainly notify me or Julie M. even administration to have their account held open and active. However this is not a scheduled clean up that will be routinely done.
Works for me. I'm sure that it will be obvious when it's time to prune the list again.



I know, I'm a dingbat GG.
I took a look at your site and I don't think you're a dingbat. Who knows, I might even buy something from you one day. Tip: It would help everybody if you added "GG" to your custom user title. There's also a special folder where you GGs can talk to each other privately. :)



I just love you all to bits :)

[Danny]

THE ACCOUNTS THAT WERE DELETED HAVE NOTLOGGED IN IN SIX MONTHS. That has nothing to do with them not posting. If they have not signed onto the site then they are wasting names other users could have and obviously have no need to even send a PM to anyone. 2000 registered names collecting dust and never returning to simply log in is a huge waste for them and for us. I hope everyone can agree upon this. Anyone going on a extended trip can certainly notify me or Julie M. even administration to have their account held open and active. However this is not a scheduled clean up that will be routinely done.



If it is to be more or less of a future policy that accounts without LogIn activity for a six month period are subject to cancellation, it might be a good idea to state that in the forum rules so that members are clear on the point.

I read the posts daily, but only Log In when I am going to post a message. Not often that a member would not Log In for as long as six months I guess, but if there is a policy regarding inactive accounts, it might be good to have it documented in the rules.

[Julie York]

If you are automatically logged in, when you visit the site, so you don't have to enter your details every time you visit (cookies enabled etc, remember me tick box) , then it means you can post regularly and keep your cookies logging you in....but you haven't actually logged in for 6 months!

Or doesn't it work like that?

[Wendy me]

when i log in the thingy says oh you again.............was that abought????????????

[Danny]

If you are automatically logged in, when you visit the site, so you don't have to enter your details every time you visit (cookies enabled etc, remember me tick box) , then it means you can post regularly and keep your cookies logging you in....but you haven't actually logged in for 6 months!

Or doesn't it work like that?

You can stay logged in so that all you have to do is bring up the website. But, for more privacy, you can log out when you are finished and clear the cookies. Then you have to enter your name and password whenever you log back in. At least that's the way it seems to work for me....lol.