Not such a good outing

[Gina_darling]

Hi, I have been out a few times now and up until now all have been fine. No-on ehas showed that they read me and if they did they were polite about it by not showing and still using female pronouns. However last night I went out and I hadn't done anything different with my look since the last time so thought everything would be the same. Started with the ticket conductor on the train calling me "Pal" then off the train a look (was a teenager so I'll let that one go!) Then at the bar I go to that is supposedly tg friendly the barman called me "mate".

Ah well you can't win them all! I had a nice drink with a friend who introduced me to a real girl friend. Turns out she was the sister of my best friend's school friend! Small world, she says she won't say anything and I believe her. My friend would be fine with it anyway I think but I'm not ready for that just yet.

I suppose I was getting a bit complacent, there is still a lot of discrimination out there and I need to be ready for it and let it wash over me like water off a duck's back.

Gina xx

[Kate Simmons]

I guess it depends on what you want Gina. I've come to the point where I don't mind if people know about me, in fact sometimes I WANT them to know I'm a guy. Now, that may sound a little weird to some folks but I think it has something to do with self image and confidence. I'm who I am which can be a blend of male and female at times and at this point, don't particularly care what others think. There just seems to so be much concern and angst about "passing" which I personally feel is overblown at best. So what if they know I'm a guy? My purpose is to have fun and enjoy being myself, not to please every Tom, Dick and Mary I may meet. If they have a problem, it's theirs, not mine. That's the way I feel about it anyway. Just have fun being yourself Gina.:happy: Sal

[Karren H]

Some people just know and there's nothing you can do about I've found... And you have a great attitude about it so as long as you enjoyed yourself that's all that counts!!

Karren

[Kelsy]

Hi Gina,

From the title of your post I though OMG what happened! well it doesn't
sound like your outing was all that bad. A Gurlfriend and I got on an elevator reciently and we were dressed to the nines headed out to the club and the elevator stops at another floor and onsteps this girl. So she hits the button and we head down. She looks us over and breaks out laughing. The lobby came quickly and as we stop and get off a group of guys and girls are waiting to get on and the ladies in the group start with wolf whistles and shouting "you go girl" And we went:heehee: Funny earlier in the day a man opened the door for me go figure:happy:

Jennifer:D

[Angie G]

That a girl Gina let it go And enjoy the good things :hugs:
Angie

[Dixie]

It's funny, but it has been my (very limited) experience that the guys are easier fooled than the girls. My first time out I said hello to a friend as I went in the theatre, and he says hi right back. The lady with him asks who was that, and he says I have no idea who she was, to which she says, Ithink that was a guy and he said NO!! When he found out it was me he was blown away never knew it was me at all. That night I fooled most of the guys but only two girls.

[Mitch23]

Hi, I have been out a few times now and up until now all have been fine. No-on ehas showed that they read me and if they did they were polite about it by not showing and still using female pronouns. However last night I went out and I hadn't done anything different with my look since the last time so thought everything would be the same. Started with the ticket conductor on the train calling me "Pal" then off the train a look (was a teenager so I'll let that one go!) Then at the bar I go to that is supposedly tg friendly the barman called me "mate".

Ah well you can't win them all! I had a nice drink with a friend who introduced me to a real girl friend. Turns out she was the sister of my best friend's school friend! Small world, she says she won't say anything and I believe her. My friend would be fine with it anyway I think but I'm not ready for that just yet.

I suppose I was getting a bit complacent, there is still a lot of discrimination out there and I need to be ready for it and let it wash over me like water off a duck's back.

Gina xx
sounds like a good night to me. i suppose you do get to the point where you just dont care - but i suppose thats some of the buzz. you go girl!

mitch

[susie evans]

that's just the nature of the beast all in all it was ok when i have days/nights like that it just makes me appreciate the realy good ones :hugs:

susie

[Alice Torn]

I had a too small wig, but looked wow, i thought. I was walking, then sitting on a bench, when a car pulled in next to mine. I waited, and waited, and walked around the block, and they were still there. Finally, I walked over, and a man told his kids, not to look!! Then, he asked me for a jump start, and I accepted, jumped his battery, while his kids looked down, or away, in his car. He then said "thank you SIR!" Earlier, i heard a yound lady shout OMG,OMG!!

[Gina_darling]

Thanks for your comments! It is appreciated and I think next time I shall flaunt it and blow kisses and the like!

[Alice B]

I'm sorry that happened to you and that is the very thing I'm trying to overcome in advance to going out. Except for a costume party I've never been out in public, but have a strong urge to do so. In a few short months I will have the perfect opportunity for 3 weeks and really,really want to go out. Without being embarssed, made fun of, ,etc.

[Fab Karen]

Hi Gina,

From the title of your post I though OMG what happened! well it doesn't
sound like your outing was all that bad. A Gurlfriend and I got on an elevator reciently and we were dressed to the nines headed out to the club and the elevator stops at another floor and onsteps this girl. So she hits the button and we head down. She looks us over and breaks out laughing. The lobby came quickly and as we stop and get off a group of guys and girls are waiting to get on and the ladies in the group start with wolf whistles and shouting "you go girl" And we went:heehee: Funny earlier in the day a man opened the door for me go figure:happy:

Jennifer:D

The girl that laughed, I doubt she intended it as a put-down, just some people think drag is something done for laughs ( "hey Bill dressed as a girl for Halloween, isn't that funny?" ).

[Billijo49504]

WOW, I too thought you might have got assaulted or something, or arrested.:heehee: But as long as you got the right attitude, to be able to laugh at your self. Nothing can hurt you. It sounds like the evening ended very well. So, alls well that ends well....BJ

[EricaCD]

I really would not fret it. Remember that, once someone outside the TG community figures out that your genetic gender and presented gender don't match, sometimes they just genuinely don't know how to proceed. Or alternately, as their brain has processed "genetic male" they will simply unconsciously use male pronouns or references. It happens to me regularly enough - even in instances where the person is being PERFECTLY courteous in all other respects.

Obviously I would not give the same benefit of the doubt to someone who was plainly acting inappropriately (and we can all imagine circumstances like this). OTOH, I think we do need to be prepared to cut society a fair amount of slack in our initial encounters.

Erica

[Kelsy]

The girl that laughed, I doubt she intended it as a put-down, just some people think drag is something done for laughs ( "hey Bill dressed as a girl for Halloween, isn't that funny?" ).

Karen
We didn't take it as a put down and just smiled :happy: I think she was far more uncomfotable than we were!!

Jennifer:D