Yipes! Outed myself to a co-worker tonight!

[kerrianna]

So I'm working in a new school, cleaning, with a co-worker I just met 3 days ago. We're getting along great, she's a really down to earth friendly person I made a nice connection with right away.

Well, tonight during our coffee break I finally ask her whether she lives alone, already knowing that she will answer that she has a female partner (I had a feeling the first night - little clues). So we get talking about her upbringing in a small town and she tells me how she hated church because she had to wear dresses and always hated dresses (again I guessed that). So I told her Carol hated church as a kid for the same reason and that she still doesn't like wearing dresses. Then I blurt out, "I've got more dresses than her"

:blushing: :blushing: :blushing:

:eek: I blushed so hard I thought my head would explode. She laughed, a little nervously, and said "Nothing wrong with that!" and there was a bit of an awkward silence as I went into red-faced overload - why did I say that to someone I barely know? When I regained my voice I casually :rolleyes: changed the subject.

After work I brought it up again because I figured maybe I took too big of a chance and should do some damage control, and we got to talking a long time about a whole lot of things. I told her my TG story, she asked how Carol felt about it, I told her, she told me how she had thought she should have been a boy when she was young, we talked about the difficulty in telling people...in short we had a wonderful heartfelt conversation!

She told me not to worry, nothing fazes her and she knows the importance of being discreet (which is what I sensed I guess) and thought it was cool. Like she said "It's important to be yourself. There's nothing wrong with that." :happy:

She's the only other person I have told other than you here and Carol. It feels good to have been able to tell someone face to face (even if my face was beet red at first) and get a positive reaction.

But I still can't believe I did that!

LOL, she told me I was welcome to show up for work in a dress. :p
Not sure what the teachers and parents would think of that. :heehee:

After reading Kew's thread on Rachel
http://www.crossdressers.com/forums/showthread.php?t=58270
I realized that it is important to be ourselves and not be afraid. We can be careful, but that is not the same thing as being fearful.

Keep getting brave bothers and sisters. :hugs: :hugs:

[Nicole]

What a sweet story, Kerri! You can never guess how someone will react to a sudden confession like that. I think your accurate perception of her personality swayed the odds in your favor.

I have atrocious gaydar. Must polish the aerials, pronto! :D

[Evert]

Well Kez, I think what happened was great. She must have been sending a lot of positive vibes to made you say that. :happy:

Maybe after her, more will follow!

:hugs: for the brave girl.

[RachelDenise]

Very bold and a great result. I think you read the situation correctly and ttok a chamce. I think the best thing was to clarify everything later. Congratulations on your outing!

[Kate Simmons]

No problem Kerri, I've done the same thing, talked to total strangers about it. Sometimes you can just "sense" the person, you know. I think it's pretty cool that you met a new friend. Much better to be sharing with someone you feel comfortable with than to constantly be on guard. You can probably have some real heart felt conversations with her. Good for you.:thumbsup: :happy:

[Jenny Beth]

What a great outcome, I'm sure your secret is safe with her. I wouldn't take her up on her offer of coming to work in a dress though for obvious reasons. But for some reason I think the sound of high heels clicking in those empty hallways would be kinda fun....:heehee:

[Di]

Wonderful hon:hugs:

[uknowhoo]

Wow! Not your average day at work, eh Kerri?

As Shu Shgu said, you knew, even if not consciously that it'd be safe to come out to her. I'm glad it worked out, and felt so liberating for you.
Congratulations, sweetie. :hugs:

Out of curiosity, was Carol's reaction to your unplanned disclosure similar to ours?

[Angie G]

Well it looks like you have a good new friend Kerrianna :hugs:
Angie

[Charleen]

After the initial shock of "Did that just come out of my mouth", it feels preety liberating don't it? Good for you Hon!

[Lisa Golightly]

Awwwwwwwww... so red :)

[kerrianna]

Out of curiosity, was Carol's reaction to your unplanned disclosure similar to ours?

Thanks everyone for the encouragement. I woke up today and had a momentary OMG moment because we do live in a small community and word gets around.

Carol's reaction was supportive, she said she has to trust I know what I'm doing :worried: , and thought that I picked a good person to tell because as a lesbian (who grew up in a small town) she already 'gets' it.

I do take into account what the ramifications of my behaviour are for Carol.

Lisa, I was red for half an hour! The building seemed awfully hot for awhile. :whew!:

:D

[deniedtoo]

Couldn't have happened to a more deserving person :hugs:

You deserve such great positive feedback, especially to such an innocent "freudian" slip :heehee:

What a roller coaster of emotion, all I can think of is how I have almost slipped from time to time too.

Congrats Ker :love:

[kerrianna]

Couldn't have happened to a more deserving person :hugs:

You deserve such great positive feedback, especially to such an innocent "freudian" slip :heehee:

What a roller coaster of emotion, all I can think of is how I have almost slipped from time to time too.

Congrats Ker :love:

Thanks Kacey, :hugs: :love:

That's really nice to hear.

I just have to be careful not to think everyone will be so cool about it.

Sure makes me want to dance and sing in the street.
Every little bit that reinforces who we are in the face of the gale of denial is good.

It sure was nice to be able to file my nails during coffee break without worry. :happy:

[Wenda]

I can relate. When having a good discussion, I have revealed more than was probably prudent, but so far I don't believe it has come back to haunt me.
When I used to travel a lot by air, I almost always had 'an airport story' when I got home. Something that complete strangers shared with me in an airport lounge or waiting room. Some times strangers are a good outlet. Your first impressions are usually pretty accurate. Keep us posted?:happy:

[trannie T]

Good story, as one who is slowly creeping out of the closet I enjoy hearing about the similiar journeys of others.

[kerrianna]

Must have been the painted tonenails.

Actually we got talking about how I've turned my view of life around and she was asking what caused the shift.

I tried being coy a bit, then finally told her a lot of it was because I have accepted being TG and am able to be my true self more. We had a very interesting discussion during the massage about being true to one's self. (She told me about her new granddaughter and how she noticed when someone is newly born you can SEE who they are at that time, then life bends and pulls them until as adults we spend a lot of time energy and money trying to regain that original true identity). She was very philosophical, down to earth and non-judgemental about what I told her, which was basically the whole story.

It was pretty cool actually. I didn't feel like I had to hide anything or apologize. She's a pretty astute person. Some of the questions she asked me were pretty thoughtful and insightful.

So that's 2 in one week. The whole town will know soon and THEN I can prance down the street with people just nodding and saying, "There goes Kerry, being the girl that she is :rolleyes:"
:D

[Dixie]

A former supervisor at the mine I worked at saw me on Halloween, couldn't get over it.:heehee:

[Evert]

:hugs::hugs::hugs::hugs::hugs:

Oh yeah and one more

:hugs:

congrats! :D

[pocoyo]

Hehe well done Kez!!

Thought I'd answer on here as well as in my message to u!

I'm glad that you told 2 cool people that accepted you for you, that is very excellent! :happy:

Your massage lady sounds cool! I like what she said about seeing who people are.

Good on you Kez me loverly :hugs::hugs::love:
It is brave to be yourself and to tell people who you are...

[CaptLex]

Congrats, Kerri . . . glad people can see that you're just a cool person regardless of what you're wearing. May it ever be so! :hugs:

[kerrianna]

Thanks guys! :hugs::hugs::hugs:

Spent a long time talking to my therapist about it all today too. It kinda normalizes it if you know what I mean?

Still not sure about the family 'outing' though. I think I'll have to actually pick my spot much more carefully with my mom or it could blow up in my face.

Tricky diffusing these gender-bombs. :worried: hmmm, cut the blue wire....or is it the pink wire first?.... SNIP! :yikes:...........:whew!:

[Wenda]

I know that a lot of girls on this forum have experienced disasters from revealing themelves, but I believe that, on balance, more have had good experiences. Life is non-reversable. You can learn from the past honour the past, and celebrate the past, but you cannot re-live it. Re-live each awesome moment of these disclosures, savour them and grow from them. Well done! congatulations! w

[carolinewalker_2000]

You took a risk and it paid off; well done; you have a new friend.

[kimberly_f37]

One down and whole lot more to go??
Telling can just come out and the red face can come on but least one thing u got a friend to share storys with !

Have A Great Day Girl !!

Kim