Dear Lesley

[Eva Diva]

Here's a letter to an advice columnist. I think it's more interesting that the subject gets discussed at all than the particulars of the answer.

http://tinyurl.com/2s2yz9

[Ruth]

Considering this letter/response is from the UK mainstream daily press, I think it's remarkably sane and well-balanced. And as we have seen from many stories on this site, telling the SO at the outset is generally reckoned to be the way to go.
So well done to the Telegraph for running this. Let's hope a lot of people read it.

[Eva Diva]

I just noticed how grammatically tortured my second sentence reads. I'll leave it up as punishment. :bonk:

[Kerrie Sifton]

Very good post Eva. Thanks for the link, I may refer to this one more than once.

[sandra-leigh]

Extracting a particular quote that touches on several simultaneous discussions over the last few days:


A fact that I find telling is that second wives apparently get told about their husband's habits sooner than first wives and third wives get told upfront. This tells me that transvestism is a non-negotiable part of a cross-dresser's character and that a relationship where it is not accepted is ultimately intolerable.

Interesting, that. I know that when then topic arises, lots of people quickly jump in and say "Once a cross-dresser, always a cross-dresser", or "No-one ever manages to give up wanting to cross-dress; at most they supress it". But you know, those answers come so quickly that they sometimes seem like a reflexive joke, a running gag -- that and the fact that if anyone did manage to really give it up, they probably wouldn't be around much to talk about it.

I'm too new to cross-dressing to have ever tried to give it up. I'm having too good a time with it at the moment to have any desire to give it up now. But at the same time, I'm too new to it to have developed any deep feeling that it is something that is definitely in me to stay; what is interesting and fun now might turn boring later. Which raises internal questions like, "Am I a real cross-dresser? Am I really transgendered? Or am I just having some harmless fun with myself?"